Update: Content Still On Hold (Patreon)

TL;DR: I am still very sick and, with one exception, I still won't be releasing videos any time soon.

I'm doing relatively okay now (I'm still feeling good emotionally) but I had to go to the ER last night because my symptoms were so bad. My chronic, severe, undiagnosed health issues continue to be chronic, severe, and mostly undiagnosed. I may be making some progress with a specialist, but sadly, specialists around here are extremely overbooked and I'm looking at over a month in between appointments (my last appointment was July 10, and I'm told I can't be seen again until August 30). I'm on a waiting list to be seen if there are cancellations before then, so please keep your fingers crossed for me!

I chose the specialist that I'm currently seeing because I suspected possible mast cell disease or histamine intolerance. During my first visit with her, she stated that she thinks I am probably experiencing a severe allergy to something, though we don't yet know to what. She ordered a bunch of blood tests (ten vials) to explore that and a bunch of other possibilities.

I don't want to get too much into my symptoms, because it's A LOT of stuff that stretches over a very long period of time. However, for the sake of transparency, I do want you to have some details so that you can understand why it's been so difficult for me to be functional lately:

I'm experiencing a lot of symptoms related to severe inflammation all over my body. Some of these symptoms include moderate to severe bone and joint pain (it's often very painful for me to grip or open things, for example), moderate to intense brain fog (showed up at the ER barefoot and barely able to answer questions last night), pain in my lungs, migraines, and a lot of really unpleasant skin irritation issues.

Again, I want to assure you that I'm doing well emotionally. I have so many people in my life who care about me and I'm indescribably grateful for that. However I'm very tired. I just want to feel better.

I had originally said that I'd catch up on all Patreon perks ASAP. At this point, I just don't know what that's going to look like or what I can in good conscience promise. I'm leaving my account active to people who want to pledge on any level, because I have personally wanted to support artists on breaks in the past. However, I want to be VERY clear that:

1. I will get through all of this, financially, even with $0 in Patreon contributions. Every single dollar that I receive in donations is genuinely helpful and deeply appreciated, however I don't want anyone to feel guilted into pledging. Debt isn't fun for anyone, but I'm in a position where I can comfortably shoulder a certain amount of debt indefinitely. I don't want anyone to feel like my well being is dependent on their donation.

2. While I have been happy to support other artists who've gone on break, I know that not everyone uses Patreon the same way. I've mentioned this before, but I want to say it again: I won't feel ANY sadness or resentment toward anyone who chooses to cancel or suspend their pledge for ANY reason. I promise. It's YOUR money and I want you to use it in whatever way best brings you health and happiness. If that means diverting funds from here to anywhere else, please know you have my blessing and encouragement.

I am keeping a commitment to create and publish a video for a project that a colleague has been working on. After carefully evaluating my abilities, I've decided to keep this commitment because it's a video I've been very enthusiastic about creating. Other than that, though, I'm not sure what my creative output will look like for a while.

Thank you for sticking with me, in whatever way you can. Even just seeing that people continue to watch my older videos is a huge comfort.

Thank you so much.

Love,

Lola