Smooth Smooth Luffy Chap 1 (Patreon)

One Piece Parody: Phone Fic

Was doing blood work, doc visit and waiting in line to get meds got this done

Smooth Smooth Luffy


What if Shanks's crew stole the Sube Sube no mi, instead of the Gum Gum? Luffy eats the Smooth Smooth fruit making his body eternally smooth and slippery. After an incident where Luffy is nearly burned alive by pirates, Garp finds out and decides to teach the boy the basics of armor haki. Luffy uses a staff for a weapon, enjoys wrestling, and still aims to be King of the Pirates!


Chapter 1 


Monkey D. Luffy, a boy who became a Smooth human after eating the Sube Sube no mi, has trained to become a pirate. His goals to build a great crew, explore the Grand Line, find the One Piece, and become King of the Pirates; obtaining the ultimate freedom. He plans to achieve his goals all while having fun and having adventures. 


His devil fruit power made his skin silky smooth, even as he went through puberty he didn't get a single body hair. His body had no blemish or imperfection. The only notable scar he had was on his face which he inflicted by stabbing his cheek to prove his bravery. Which happened before he ate the fruit. 


He was given a cloak to wear, as his usual attire consisted of speedos or nothing at all. Because of his powers his body is slippery, blades, bullets, even physical blows just slide right off him. So Luffy got into a habit of fighting naked, as his clothing could be grabbed and lead to him being caught. The speedos were a reasonable alternative.


The cloak covered his practically naked form, so he wouldn't stand out when he visited a town or city. When he needed to fight he could just throw off the cloak and go to town. He was armed with a staff, lovingly crafted by his brother Ace. The only other item he had was his Straw Hat given to him by Red Haired Shanks. 


The boy may have looked like a twink but he was deceptively strong. His years of training had built up quite a bit of muscle. When he flexed, it made his muscles really pop. He wasn't scared of setting off on his own because he was strong!


Which the Lord of Coast learned first hand when he tried to eat Luffy the day he set sail. He dodged his attack and gave him a swift Sumo Slap to the face shattering his teeth and cracking his skull. 


-x- 


He was taking the East Blue by storm. He took on the Alvida Pirates, when their paths crossed by chance. The woman had quite the ego, demanding her men praise her for her beauty, and if they didn't she hit them with her club. "Tell them boys, who's the most beautiful pirate in all the seas?"


"That would be Luffy-sama!"


"What?!" Alvida gasped. 


The men had seen Luffy in his half naked glory, and had become smitten. Luffy was quite the beauty, with a natural charm that drew people to him. When he left the Goa Kingdom he left quite a few suitors behind. "Aww you guys are sweet, but I like strong men!" Even as Luffy fought them and knocked them out the guys had hearts in their eyes. 


He helped free Koby who had been made a slave on her ship, for two years. He proved his strength and courage by standing up to Alvida. He had used some form of invisible force to block her club and force her back. 


Luffy followed through and hit Alvida with a Sumo Thrust, sending her flying off into the distance. Marines arrived, cannons blazing so Luffy bolted out. Koby went with him. He may have wanted to join the marines, but this situation wasn't ideal. 


There was a Marine Base nearby, but Koby was scared to go there. "They have a demon locked up there. A man known as the Pirate Hunter Roronoa Zoro!"


"Sounds interesting." Luffy smiled. "I'd like to meet this demon." Koby couldn't believe it. He hadn't met anyone like Luffy before, but he was glad he met him. 


-Luffy's Haki-


"Hey Luffy, how'd you block Alvida before, was it your devil fruit or something else?"


"I used Haki." 


"What's that?"


"It's a power that exists in all living things. My Grandpa taught it to me. He didn't want to at first but then he learned some pirates almost burned me to death." Koby's jaw dropped. He was so blatant about nearly being killed. 


Luffy's Pov


I had been following my brother Ace around and learned his hiding spot for his pirate loot. I also met his friend Sabo, but the meeting turned sour when they planned to kill me.


 The pirates he stole from were looking him, but found me instead. I had clothes on so they managed to drag me away. They wanted me to tell them where the treasure was, I knew but I wouldn't talk.


They tried to stab me, punch me, kick me, but their attacks just slid right off me. So the leader whatever his name was threw me in a sleeping bag and strung me up over a burning flame. It hurt like hell, it was scary, painful, and I thought I was gonna die, but I didn't talk. 


It taught me my fruit wasn't perfect, and some phenomenon could still touch me. Ace and Sabo rescued me, and we bonded over it. When Grandpa found out he was pissed, he decided to show me a technique he said would help protect me. 


He gave me a first step to learning haki, but refused to teach me anything else since I wanted to become a pirate. He tried to tempt me saying there was even more to haki, but he'd only show me if I joined the marines. I figured I'd figure it out eventually on my own, so I stayed true to my dreams. 


It is a form of spiritual power, by channeling my spirit I can shield my body, or enhance an object to attack. Grandpa said he put his love into his fist, which is why he could still hurt me even though attacks just slide off my body. Different emotions can effect one's spirit, so I learned to do the same. 


End Pov


"Amazing, do you think I can learn to do that?" 


"It is possible, if you work hard enough." Luffy took a lot of hits and went through a lot just to scratch the surface of haki. "This world is such a mysterious place there is so much more to learn and discover." Koby was amazed. 


His grandfather trained him hard, his body was a well honed machine, needing only knowledge to tap into something greater.


-x-


Going to the Marine Base was a smooth affair. The captain of the base was a corrupt asshole who ruled by fear and violence, and his spoiled brat of a son treated the village like he owned the place. Roronoa Zoro stood up to the spoiled brat, but since he threatened those he was protecting, and fighting the marines would make him a criminal.


So the swordsman called the Pirate Hunter, referred to as a demon, made a deal to protect the family he defended. One month strung up in the execution yard, if he survived the family would be forgiven and he could walk away a free man. Luffy decided he liked this guy and planned to wait for him to finish his trial before getting him to join his crew. 


The fact Zoro didn't want to be a pirate was a trivial matter. What made Luffy snap was that the spoiled son Helmeppo never planned to honor his deal with Zoro, and was even gonna execute him because he was bored. Luffy punched him, slipped into the Marine Base and got Zoro's back.


When Captain Morgan tried to execute Zoro and Koby via firing squad, Luffy jumped into the hail of bullets and acted as a human shield via haki. Zoro couldn't believe it. The marines charged in with swords but their attacks just slid off Luffy's skin. "Just what are you?" 


"I ate the smooth smooth fruit and became a smooth human, attacks just slide right off my body."


"But before you stopped the bullets?"


"That...I used my haki. They wouldn't have hurt me but I didn't want to risk the bullets sliding off my body and hitting you or Koby." 


"Devil fruit...haki?" Zoro had thought this guy was just some pervert pirate. The fact Luffy showed up to talk to him wearing nothing but speedos didn't help. 


"Yep...shihihi I told you I was strong." He used his staff to fight back against the marines, breaking their swords and smashing their guns. Zoro was impressed, not only was Luffy strong, a capable fighter, optimizing his devil fruit power and this haki power. He also showed more honor and caring than the marines. 


Luffy defended his honor, got his swords back, and even saved his life. So when the choice came of joining Luffy's crew and fighting against the marines; there by becoming an outlaw, or staying here and dying, it was really a no brainer. 


Zoro got free and blocked a whole squad of marines using his three sword style. "My goal is to become the world's strongest swordsman, even if I become infamous the world will know the name Roronoa Zoro as the strongest!" Zoro said proudly. "I'll cut down anyone who gets in the way of that dream, even you Captain!"


"Well the future King of the Pirates deserves the best, I'd expect nothing less of my swordsman!" Zoro smirked at his words.


"Big talker!" The marines got mopped up pretty quickly. After Morgan and Helmeppo were taken out, the marines actually seemed happy he was defeated. Even his own men hated him just lacked the power to stop him. 


Zoro had joined Luffy's crew, the man who wanted to be the World's Greatest Swordsman, and the man who wanted to be King of the Pirates. The two were about to take the East Blue by storm. Zoro wasn't exactly wrong with Luffy being a pervert though…


To be continued Smooth Sex and Haki Training Wrestling