The Elevator Thirty-Sixth Floor (Patreon)

Cardonali the magical imp was doing what he always did, he caused  trouble to others for his own amusement.  Cardonali had the ability to  put any thought into a person's mind and manipulate them as he wanted   to.  He stood unobserved or at least unacknowledged in the back of an  elevator waiting to see who would get in.

Barney Harris and Nick Miller had never liked each other since the day Nick moved into the building.  They were actually next-door neighbors.  They mostly ignored each other, but when Barney saw that Nick was wearing the same dress as he was, he said under his breath through a gritted smile, "I didn't know they made this dress in sizes big enough for a cow."

Then in a quieter voice, Nick said "I'm sorry, micropenis says what?"

"What?"

"So you admit it.  You're a micropenis."

"I can get any woman I want."

"I guess you don't want any women.  Are you gay?"

"I'm more man than you will ever be."

"I don't think so.  We all know why you don't wear stretch pants."

"If you were twice and smart and half as fat, you would be merely average."

"Stop changing the subject.  I've got low heels longer than your dick."

"High heels couldn't support a  cow like you."

The insults escalated until punches were thrown.  Barney and Nick had never liked each other, but when for the first time, Barney and Nick saw each other in identical dresses, a fight was inevitable.

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