Directing Superman (Patreon)

This was the second February story for Luke K. DeAn, one of the Bosa Tier patrons, and features a bodyswap between Henry Cavill and Zack Snyder.

“Okay, cut! Time out, everyone. Take a break, get some water. Henry, before you go anywhere, let’s just have a quick chat.”

A heavy sigh escaped the lips of A-List actor Henry Cavill as the director’s voice interrupted the scene they had been in the process of shooting. It had been their ninth pass at the scene and they were almost eleven hours into that day’s shoot on a film that was already two weeks behind schedule, so nobody had been happy to hear the director write off their latest attempt. Despite the displeasure, none of them were actually surprised; such interruptions and schedule issues were to be expected when working with a perfectionist like Zack Snyder. The director had a very clear vision for his projects and it didn’t matter how long it took, he was going to get the scene finished in exactly the fashion that he wanted it to be.

With some reluctance, the hunky British actor stomped towards the director’s chair. He wasn’t fooled by the smile on Snyder’s face; the director was less than impressed with what his lead actor had been offering. This wasn’t the first time that Henry had been summoned for a private chat with Zack that day, as the consultations had become something of a regular occurrence throughout the shooting of the Man of Steel sequel. At first Henry had been willing to put it down to the extended period since his last portrayal of Superman in Justice League, but despite his growing relaxation back into the familiar role, he apparently still wasn’t providing the performance that the director was looking for.

Although he was harboring continually growing frustrations towards the director (certainly not helped by the tiredness that had been brought on by such an intensive filming day), Henry hid those feelings behind a polite smile as he approached Zack. You were all but begging to play Superman again, the actor reminded himself. This is the price you have to pay. Suck it up, Cavill! He’d been hired to do a job and he certainly wasn’t the type to go rogue and start beefing with the director, not unless the older man did anything to really upset him which the optimistic actor didn’t believe was in line with Zack’s character. An uptight perfectionist? Sure. Not a megalomaniac though.

“Henry, this just isn’t working right now,” Zack declared somewhat dramatically while scratching at the base of his skull. “I’d like to try something a little different, if that’s alright with you. A little… untraditional, you might say, but I would need your verbal agreement before I proceeded.”

Although confused by the director’s bizarre wording, Henry quickly decided that his eagerness to get the day’s shoot over and done with was a greater driving force than the seed of apprehension that those words had planted. “Of course,” he replied with a nod, “What have you got for me?”

The six-foot-one actor watched as the director fished an object out of his jacket pocket and was more than a little confused at what was produced. It appeared to be some type of jewelry piece, with hoops that wrapped around Zack’s fingers and thumb as well as a red gemstone that now sat in the palm of his hand. After the item was firmly fixed into place, the director then extended that same hand out to indicate he was expecting a handshake. Despite his intense bewilderment at Zack’s behavior, Henry consented but as soon as their hands were clasped with the red jewel between their palms, the most intense chill the actor had ever experienced rippled right through his muscular body.

Henry’s initial response was to try and jerk his hand away but strangely (as he knew he was easily the stronger of the pair) he just couldn’t break the director’s grip. No matter how hard he struggled, the actor was completely trapped; Zack suddenly had the strength of a thousand men and there was no way Henry could compete. The bitter frost that had spread through the actor’s body persisted to the point of pain and even kept him from forcing out a desperate plea for Zack to let him go. All rational thought fled Henry’s mind and he was left to conclude that he was having some sort of cardiac episode or that the director had exposed him to some fast-acting poison.

The truth was actually quite far removed from both of those possibilities and indeed was actually far beyond anything Henry might have seriously considered to be happening. As the two men locked eyes, the hunky actor was startled to discover an almost demonic glee hidden behind the director’s eyes. Zack was clearly reveling in whatever was happening to Henry, but the Superman actor couldn’t understand for the life of him why the director would cause such harm to his lead actor. Couldn’t Zack see that he would have an absolute PR nightmare on his hands if a Hollywood A-Lister died while alone on set with him?

All of a sudden Henry experienced a severe pulling sensation as if somebody had tied him to a rapidly accelerating vehicle, although the actor’s physical form didn’t move even an inch in response to the strange phenomenon. Henry would later learn that it had been the moment where his soul had been ripped out of his own body and deposited into the director’s body. It wasn’t a one-way experience either, as Zack’s own consciousness was passing right back through the magical contraption to spread itself out in Henry’s much larger body. Given he had been the initiator of the swap, the director didn’t experience any of the pain during the transfer that his leading man did, but both men found their sight failing them before being restored a second later - only now from the position of their new body!

Henry’s jaw dropped as he stared across at his own grinning face. But… how? He was in such a state of shock that he failed to realize he had regained the ability to move until his doppelganger ripped their hand free. They took the magical piece of jewelry too, prompting Henry to let out a cry of pain at how his fingers were twisted by the forceful removal of the item. It was that exclamation that alerted Henry both to his restored capabilities and the distinctly incorrect voice that had come forth from his mouth. It took a few moments but the actor quickly identified that he wasn’t looking directly across at his own face but rather up at it. He had somehow gotten shorter.

“Figuring it out now?” Zack asked from within Henry’s body, folding his massive arms over his powerful chest. The director’s attention was immediately caught by how the biceps bulged beneath the tight Superman suit and his stolen eyes lit up in excitement for a brief moment before he locked eyes with the real Henry Cavill once more. “Before you start freaking out though, I want you to think rationally about this. We’ll be able to fly through the filming process - no pun intended - now that I can deliver the performance that I wanted for my film. No more falling behind schedule! That’s what you wanted, wasn’t it?” Henry wanted to protest that he hadn’t wanted it to the extent of having his body stolen, but the director continued: “Besides, you gave your consent. The magic wouldn’t have worked unless you were willing to let me help you.”

Still struggling to comprehend the events that had just occurred, the actor glanced down at the unfamiliar hands and the more slender body he was currently occupying. Now that he was fully aware of what had happened, he couldn’t help but focus on just how small and weak he felt! It had easily been at least a decade since he had last fit into size medium clothing but now the sleeves of Zack’s tee were loose around his thinner arms. The only point of tightness was around his stomach where there was a slight gut which itself was a far cry from the tight core and rippling abs of Henry’s own body. Oh, how he missed them already!

“I didn’t know I was consenting to this,” he protested weakly, wincing as he heard the director’s voice speaking his words. “Come on, Zack. This isn’t right and you know it! We’re friends, aren’t we? Just switch us back and I promise I’ll deliver the performance you were looking for. Don’t do this.”

Henry’s pleas for an immediate restoration to his rightful body were quickly met by laughter and the other man shaking his head. “I couldn’t switch us back right now even if I wanted to,” the body-swapped director claimed, “It’ll take at least forty-eight hours for the magic in that jewel to recharge.”

“Forty-eight hours?!” Henry cried, his eyes bulging in shock and dismay. “You’re messing with me, aren’t you? Tell me this isn’t really happening. Tell me this is just a dream - a nightmare!”

Zack unfurled his arms and slapped his hands down on Henry’s shoulders, with the force of the contact causing the actor to flinch. “Like you said, we’re friends. I don’t lie to my friends,” he replied, speaking calmly as if their conversation was about something as ordinary as a grocery order. “Trust me, this will be so much better for everyone. We might actually finish filming by the end of the month! Don’t worry about being in the director’s chair either. We’ll meet every morning and I’ll brief you on what I want you to do so nobody wonders why Zack Snyder is acting all weird. These next three weeks will be over before you know it and then you’ll be back in this big beefy body of yours!”

It took Henry several seconds to pick up on the information Zack had so casually slipped into his last remark. “Wait, three weeks?! I thought you said that you’d switch us back in forty-eight hours!” His voice - no, Zack’s voice - had risen to a yell as his face twisted into an expression of rage. Despite the intensity of his reaction though, the director continued to wear a smug grin like he had innocently stumbled upon a winning lottery ticket.

“I never said that,” Zack pointed out, “I just said that the magic wouldn’t recharge for another forty-eight hours. We’ll swap back once filming wraps up and I’ll do nothing unsightly in your body in the meantime, you have my word. Now, keep your voice down. People will be coming back to the set any moment now and you don’t want them to think their director’s had a mental breakdown from the stress, do you?”

The scarcely hidden threat in those words sent a shiver down Henry’s spine. Given he had never anticipated that Zack would go to such extreme measures to bring his vision to reality, Henry knew that it wouldn’t be good for him to underestimate the director. Just a few minutes ago the actor would have laughed off the idea of being body-switched but Zack had accomplished that, so who knew what else he could do to pull Henry in line?

“Okay,” the actor mumbled in defeated fashion, bowing his head in a display of submission. Just as the director had predicted, the crew were beginning to return to the set and they would soon be looking to Henry for direction, as well as glaring daggers at him when his back was turned, misguidedly under the impression that he was the reason they were still working at such a late hour.

“I knew you’d understand!” Henry flinched once more as the other man slapped him on the arm in what would appear to everyone else on set as a friendly gesture. From his perspective though, that simple action was laced with mockery and there was absolutely nothing he could do but stay silent and take it. 

“Now, why don’t you get everyone in position?” Zack suggested while rolling his broad shoulders and tensing the muscles in the powerful arms he had inherited from the lead actor, “I’ve got a feeling that the next take is going to be just what the director was looking for and then we can finally all go home… right, Zack?”

The actor just nodded, too conquered to even offer any more words, but that was enough to please his director-turned-tormentor. “Good talk, buddy! I’m sure you’ll have fun directing your first film. It’s a real rush, but it’s a pretty different game to acting. Oh! Speaking of acting, I guess it’s finally time for me to show you how to be a better Superman, huh? Maybe you could take some notes.” Henry silently seethed while Zack took a few steps back and sighed dramatically. The director couldn’t leave without offering one more biting comment at the actor’s expense though: “Working with actors is the toughest part of any director’s job, didn’t you know?”

You’re gonna live to regret this, Snyder. Henry glared at the sight of the broad back muscles (his muscles!) retreating towards the set and shook his head. Just you wait…