The Things That Didn’t Get Done: An Invitation. (Patreon)

Hello my loves

Greetings from Woodstock, where a lot of things have not gotten done. Including on my patreon list. All over my life. And probably yours. I said to coco last night:

the thing about the holidays is that you’re forced into a kind of acceptance of where it’s all at.

There is no way out. Assessment pounds on the door.

This is what I managed to get done by this point in time; and this is what I did not.

These are the relationships I am in (or out of) right now; this is where they stand, this is how they’ve shifted.

This is what I managed to give; and this is what I wasn’t able to give. This is how much I managed - or didn’t manage - to care for myself.

This is what I managed to fix, to dispose of, to grow, to mend, to throw away; and the rest?

Well here we are.

It’s the holidays: TOO LATE. The rest doesn’t matter.

This is where we land, this is how far we got. This is where we are.

……..

I have noticed over the past few holiday-whirr days that I am struggling more than usual to accept that This Is Where Things are at and I thought I’d just list a few things here, and invite you to do the same. What are the things that pain you, that nag you, the things that you are just desperate to wrap up but refuse to get wrapped?

This is by no means an exhaustive list, but i’ll give it a stab. This will at least make me feel better. And it might make you feel better too.

I haven’t opened my postal mail since coming back from New Zealand. There are ten boxes. I am paralyzed.

I haven’t finishing writing and sending out those postcards I addressed to the $100 patrons.

I haven’t found my band a stateside manager.

I haven’t picked up and finished all of the unfinished film projects for patreon that just need to be finished.

I haven’t gotten Ash a bunk bed.

I haven’t given away all these clothes and shoes that don’t fit him.

I haven’t mended all the clothes that I’ve managed to rip. They’re just in a huge pile.

I haven’t answered the 1,900 emails in my inbox.

I haven’t answered a handful of my texts from this last week.

I haven’t posted enough $5 surprise posts for patrons.

I haven’t unpacked half of my boxes from New Zealand.

I haven’t been great about flossing and I still haven’t replaced the nightguard I lost in New Zealand at the start of covid.

I haven’t put Ash’s gingerbread house back together since it got covered with ants and I disassembled it and put it in the freezer.

There are many other things.

Piles of Undone.

Things of all sorts - at all levels - that needed mending that didn’t get mended, or would not take to mending. In all departments; art, heart, and hearth.

It is what it is.

Now, we put it down.

We look at what we did.

I did things, too.

I wrote a really good song. And recorded it.

I’ve spent a lot of time with my son.

I’ve started ice bathing again (in the creek. every morning.)

I’ve made some incredible friends.

My band is back together.

I managed to have people over to the house last night.

And for fucks sake:

we made a gingerbread house, period.

I’ll take it. I mean it.

…..

Your turn!!!

Ok: what you got? What didn’t get done? And more importantly:

What did get done that make it all okay?

I love this life and I love all of you.

See you soon, with a song.

x

Afp