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a very tired amanda leaves you a very tired voice ramble (Patreon)

Published:
2019-02-28 00:27:49
Imported:
2023-04

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(patron-only)

you loves

i am so tired. i just ran a show-making marathon and added one 24 hour trip to detroit. it's just the beginning of album promo and i am already FRIED.

i got the cold. all the oregano oil and zinc and turmeric did not help.

the "live from here show" on NPR was therefore shambolic and beautiful .... i played "drowning in the sound" with FULL BAND and holy fuck it sounded wonderful and i played bigger on the inside with the band backing me up, also stunning, and i tore ukulele anthem a new orafice. the uke was out of tune, i couldn't hold it properly because the mics were weird, i forgot my own lyrics, i delivered the final note like a dying banshee. it was .... punk as fuck.

you can listen to the whole show HERE, quick:

https://www.livefromhere.org/

meanwhile

the warm-up shows were epic. epically sloppy, epically long. i still need to trim 30 minute off the show. but i feel it, the show, the heart, the point, the arc, the show is real. i have it, i just need to carve. i am so tired. tomorrow i have WNYC radio, then meetings and interveiws, then i get on a plane to toronto to do canadian CBC radio press.

it's dusk.

i had enough energy to make you a voice ramble from my hotel room in new york. here it is

https://soundcloud.com/amandapalmer/voiceramble-feb-27-2019

if you want to READ this voice ramble, you can do so (and peruse the whole archive of voice rambles lovingly transcribed by alex) right here:

https://docs.google.com/document/d/19qKxjXn5tHSDBecgvuy_4a7BnvhA2iG0M_vRpWcPZy0/#heading=h.z0js06m8m8rm 

one thing...

if you were at any of the warm-up shows in hudson or at joe's pub over the last few nights....THANK YOU. i asked for feedback at the end of the night and said to go ahead and leave it here on the patreon in comments but then i realized that would be DUMB because spoilers.

so here, me & hayley made you a gmail address.

write in, i'm reading, and please be kind to me, i'm insecure. but feedback is very very very welcome. the show is still being written. if there's anything you loved, say it. if you hated, say it. if you were confused, say it:

ThereWillBeNoFeedback@gmail.com 

(note that gmail is not case sensitive).

if you wanna just offer up happiness or gratitude about the show, for fuck's sake do it here.

i love you all

dinner then bed

x

a

 

------THE NEVER-ENDING AS ALWAYS---------

1. if you’re a patron, please click through to comment on this post. at the very least, if you’ve read it, indicate that by using the heart symbol.

2. see All the Things i've made so far on patreon: http://amandapalmer.net/patreon-things

3. join the official AFP-patron facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/afpland

4. new to my music and TOTALLY OVERWHELMED? TAKE A WALK THROUGH AMANDALANDA….we made a basic list of my greatest hits n stuff on this lovely page: http://amandalanda.amandapalmer.net/

5. general AFP/patreon-related questions? ask away, someone will answer: patronhelp@amandapalmer.net

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Comments

Anonymous

OMG, I am so excited you were on Live from Here! And you were excellent. :) Much love to you, afp. You rock, always. And the Uke Anthem might be my fav of all your tunes. So happy I danced while I listened.

Anonymous

I'm sorry you got sick. I missed this message. I posted my feedback on the newest post but I''m super grateful for the album. It's like music therapy for healing the wounds of so many people if only by just keeping them company. Thank you.

Anonymous

Just wanted to add: I love you, and I am so excited for my fellow fans and Patrons to see this show.

Anonymous

When it comes to art i like to think of it like this: everyone who comes to interact with a piece, comes on a spectrum. You will literally get all of the possible reactions to it imaginable, eventually. Most people will stop at “i like/i don’t like this” and move on. Some will absolutely get the message and some will go out of their way not to because it challenges who they are as people. Everyone is at a different stage in life. And though we want and sometimes expect others to be on our level, you are right, it is out of our control. It is frustrating. But i definitely think that is the lesson for someone with a message. It is like being a teacher and focusing on the feeling of “how do i reach out to these kids and connect?” All you can do is your best. Some will keep up others will not. A first reaction is what it is, but to reject connection and the lesson as a student eventually is a choice. In time they may learn the same lesson from someone else and thats ok.

Cyn

Late commenting, but I totally get the focus on the hater. I had one who has some power try to destroy me at one of the hardest times in my life. And it basically worked. I know no one can really do that, that it was my clinging to her hate that allowed me to give up. I wrote a lot of unpublished revenge things that helped get it out of my body. I cast a you can't see me, you can't hear me, you forget my name spell. But at one point in my life, she was a colleague, an incredible talent, and I still cannot bring myself to read or even listen to her work. It makes me want to hate, which I refuse to do, for my own health. But there she is, popping into various social media feeds because we have so many common contacts. Still not sure what to do with all that, and it's been nearly 5 years.

Cyn

Oh, your voice - hot whiskey. Honey, lemon, a shot of Irish or whatever, in a large mug with really hot water. Sip it carefully to not burn your tongue, but it's a decent emergency fix for a sick voice. One right before you go on. Maybe one at intermission if it starts to wear off. Water in between. I use it for performances when I'm sick, or if it's a surprise no warm up long reading.

Anonymous

I just got to listen to this today (yep, my working weeks are pretty crazy at the moment), but... what you say about criticism, ah, how it got to me. I'm just so scared people will think I'm a fraud, and that one bad comment/ opinion would make me go mad haha... maybe I need to take courage and finally post some of my stuff... one day :)

Anonymous

the marathon begins!! BE GOOD TO YOURSELF <3 stay healthy, take self-care days, take your ice baths :D And by the way, the album is so so so so beautiful...I've broken your rule to listen to it on good speakers, I'm listening to it on anything and everything because I've already lost count of the number of times I've listened to it, and it just makes me want to love everyone...thank you <3 <3 <3

Anonymous

Thank you. For being you, and for the record, and for putting words to feelings I've always struggled with, and for the reminder that everyone is a teacher. There's a fierce kind of pride in my chest hearing you talk about giving your energy to the people you love and the things you wanna do. It's 6am and I don't have the right words, but I love you so very much. Thank you for being exactly who you are, and for sharing so much 🖤

Virginia Marcs

Notes from Joe's Pub: 1. Your outfit was amazing! 2. Don't forget to take your shoe off for the Ukulele-ing. 3. I loved your stories. I actually laughed a LOT more than I thought I would and it was beautiful. 4. The songs that are generally faster felt difficult but I got the sense that it was because you were exhausted and fighting a cold so this isn't really a criticism, more of a "I really hope you're not too focused on that bit" ... 5. The stories are REALLY coming together - I felt like you were so close and I know that you know that just repeating and ironing out segues will do the trick so I don't feel like you really need any help with that... that's kind of your thing. You tell stories, and connect -SO TRUST YOUR INSTINCTS. 6. I cried in places I didn't expect. Like, I think I cried most during Mother's Confession - and I'm not even a mom. Also, the audience participation on that was great. 7. It felt like a decision needed to be made for the possiblity of the "oohs" for "Name of song removed because it might be a spoiler, but you'll know what I mean," in that it felt really natural to follow Ben's lead on that (I mean, I already was starting it in my head anyway and I imagine I'm not alone) - but the audience around me, and myself, felt uncertain as to whether or not you wanted it to happen so we let it peter out. Yes? No? To Oooh or not to Oooh? :) 8. Have you ever used "Singer's Saving Grace"? I had laryngitis about 7 years ago, so bad, and I had a gig with my swing band. I was going to cancel but someone recommended that I try this "miracle" - haha. I was dubious. I'm not anymore. It won't save you. But it will help. I have a lot of "voice teacher" stuff I want to say but I don't want to be insulting or over-prod at the vehicle through which your art comes because it doesn't need fixing and that's not my point. But, in the event that any of this might be helpful, here are just a couple little tricks that you may already know ... If you're afraid you don't have enough voice to "waste" on even warming up -singing very easily in your lower voice for 30 minutes beforehand to get the blood flowing is so helpful. I understand the fear of not wanting to lose what little is there (if this is where you were at or if you ever feel that way ... ), but if you're going to talk, you can hum. And humming will be better for your voice anyway. You, as a singer, are biologically different than other humans now, because your body has literally built new capillaries to fuel your vocal cords with blood flow. Warm that area up. The blood needs to be flowing to work efficiently. Science always seems to win me over on things and warming up properly is something I used to occasionally neglect, but now that I know the science of it - yeah, warming up is like a religion. I eat breakfast, I brush my teeth and I warm up my voice. (I'm not assuming that you don't warm up, btw. Pleeeeeease know that this is all just given out of love!) Obviously, hydration is the most important thing and pedialyte is my most vital tool for this. And a great steamy shower. But avoid singing in the shower, especially as a barometer for what your voice can do. The information being fed back to you in the shower is false and things will feel easier because you're essentially coated in delicious steam down there in that larynx. Once I'm really good and hydrated, if my upper range is feeling weak, I will drink some caffeine just before I sing (warm up a little with it so you know what's going on in there) sans dairy and the caffeine helps achieve the top notes. This will only last through the first 60-90 minutes but after that you will be really warmed up anyway. Singing sick is always frustrating. I hope that some of this helps and in any case, you killed it. My friend and I were holding hands weeping during "Voicemail to Jill" ... just, extraordinary. So excited for you and so proud of you and so IN LOVE with this album.

Anonymous

I LOVE THE ALBUM OH MY GOD! I am listening now, for a second time already. And this is in the middle of a three city trip, when I usually don't power up my laptop. I'm crying. In a good way.

Anonymous

The snow pictures are SO GOOD! And there's this: I didn't have an orgasm until I was 30. Not for lack of trying. The guy who first gave me an orgasm turned out to be a sociopath. I killed my sex drive. On purpose. So I wouldn't be tempted to fall for anyone again. I haven't even masturbated in almost two years because I didn't want the longing for another person to start again. Today, the lyric in The Ride, "it's just a ride, and you can get off anytime that you like," hit me in an entirely different way. And I sobbed. Thank you, for this album, and all that it means, to so many of us. We love you so much.