Lewd Dungeon, Book 10 prologue (Patreon)

Prologue – Trade Chat

(Adventurer’s Guild Official Forums, Miami Branch)

SunnyBunz, MightyMouse, ImAPally, DontYouWantMe, AsaAkiraIsBae, BestGirl, LatinHeat, Salty, Backpage, Craig34, l33tpally, Anonymous3, Anonymous4, RedFox, Kimiko, DonnyJuan, Crusader, BadCompany, HurricaneGal, Scholar, Righteous, Id10t, Satyr, DarkEnchanter, ScoopGirl, VenusFlyTramp, MagicMike, TsundereHealer, Max, LightningLegacy, SwiftTaylor, Domino, Bacchus, Aegis, Temptation, and Lord_Kickass are in the chat.

HurricaneGal: Holy shit, did you hear that message on the TV?

Anonymous4: What, the whole ‘Galactic Assembly’ thing? Has to be fake, right?

MagicMike: Dunno, Anon. We already know that there’s definitely a ‘System’, and it apparently started here when an idiot went to Roswell and pressed a button. If that was the ‘reset’, as we were told, then the aliens are probably real.

TsundereHealer: Seriously? We’re seriously saying it is aliens?

Temptation: If it helps, I can confirm that there is System lore regarding treaties prior to when we got the System, indicating massive wars between civilizations.

Satyr: How’d you get that lore?

Temptation: The System gave me a message, referencing one of the treaties that pertains to dungeons. Which is why there are so many gods enshrined in my dungeon.

Kimiko: So, these are real aliens? For real?

Scholar: Seems to be that way. It will be fascinating to see what they are here for, and what they can teach us.

VenusFlyTramp: But why wait a full year before showing up?

Scholar: Well, there are about 6500 spoken languages in the world today. Not counting multiple dead languages and precursor languages. The top five most spoken languages are Mandarin Chinese, Spanish, English, Arabic, and Hindi. That’s four different alphabets with five wildly divergent word structures and grammar rules. Frankly, the fact that they were able to get their message to translate into those five languages as fluidly as it was in just a year is nothing short of amazing, even with System assistance.

AsaAkiraIsBae: All right! Taking all bets! ‘We come in peace’ at 5 to 1 odds! Alien invasion at 7 to 2! Using us to breed a new generation of warriors at 100 to 1! Plenty of other options available!

MagicMike: What about us breeding them? Did you see the pictures of that catgirl that is the ambassador? Daaaamn!

Crusader: Ugh. Men. Always thinking with their dicks.

Temptation: Don’t be like that, you’ll make your boytoys cry as they wait for your kid to drop so the next one can knock you up again.

Crusader: YOU ASSHOLE! I SWEAR, I WILL FIND A WAY TO END YOU!

RedFox: Or you could give in. He gives excellent massages when he wants to, or if you’ve been good.

LightningLegacy: Wait, RedFox? I thought you and the Valkyries were dead! No one has seen or heard from you since your last dive a month ago!

RedFox: You could say we… ran into some complications, and have had a change of status.

LightningLegacy: Oh. Oh I’m so sorry. Did you get captured and sent to his Breeding Rooms?

RedFox: No, not exactly…

Temptation: You can go ahead and tell them. The soldiers making the run through the dungeon now will let everyone know soon enough.

RedFox: Yes, Master.

SunnyBunz: Wait, Master?

RedFox: Yes, the Valkyries have pledged ourselves to the dungeon, and serve Lord Kuronoth now as his slaves.

SwiftTaylor: Damn. That’s a blow. We thought for sure you were one of the groups that would stand strong against his corruption.

Temptation: You didn’t do much better, as I recall.

Aegis: What role do you have in the dungeon?

RedFox: We’ve been split up, for the most part. Mari joined the FBI lady as part of the first-floor boss fight. Shannon now operates a ‘rest area’ after the Water Temple. Rubi and Tina are now vampires living on the new Undead floor. And I am serving at the Master’s side before his altar, alongside the warlock he owns.

BadCompany: Damn. That’s a lot of power boosting the dungeon. But why break you guys up instead of letting you stay as a team?

Temptation: Because the only place to truly put them if I left them as a team would be to place them on the undead floor, and undeath would interfere with some of their abilities too greatly, weakening their overall effect.

Craig34: So, moving away from the Demon getting some sexy new pawns, anyone know what the alien ship is going to do next?

ScoopGirl: Apparently, it is just hanging in orbit for the moment, though my friends at the national desk say a source indicated that the aliens want to speak to the UN. They seem a little uncertain, though, since the UN isn’t really all that much of a government.

Scholar: According to the System, most planets have a global government before they achieve space flight, and typically only have one language, with a few regional dialects. We must be confusing the hell out of them.

Lord_Kickass: Going back to the dungeon, though, what is this you mentioned earlier about soldiers going through it?

Temptation: Oh, the group of soldiers that announced my existence to the world and gave you all those lovely subjugation quests returned, eager to test how effective mass-produced, System-made firearms are against monsters.

Scholar: Really? I know System rifles perform better than earlier models, but they’ve managed to make them economical for mass production?

Temptation: It would appear so.

ScoopGirl: How are they doing? I imagine that rifles would be something of a game-changer, right?

Temptation: Not as much as you might think. The Boss Goblin fight really hammered them since they tried to go with just rifles for the fight, which meant they didn’t have any melee threats to keep the warriors from simply going full defense while covering the casters. Things… did not go well for them.

ScoopGirl: Are they dead, then?

Temptation: No, though a couple may well wish they were. No, I allowed them to be removed from the fight so they could continue their run and I can get data on how guns work in my dungeon. I may do a specialized version of the dungeon just for those bringing guns in.

Lord_Kickass: REALLY? Damn, that’ll be sweet!

RedFox: Or deadly, once the goblins have guns, too.

Lord_Kickass: Oh, that’ll suck.

VenusFlyTramp: But how would you modify Captain Hentai to work with guns?

Kimiko: VFT, I really, really, REALLY didn’t need the image of that fucker getting any more powerful to haunt my nightmares.

Temptation: Well, I had considered giving him the ability to use magic…