Faith, Draft 1, 1 5, outline, CH 11 (Patreon)

Faith in the Family, Commentary, CH 11

Thomas is talked into taking/taking over a safe sex class with somewhat disastrous result.

I think this is a chapter where me and Ben might end up arguing. The changes he made to the story I feel gut the tension out of it. Where I have Thomas utterly freaking out at realizing he might very well be infected by a lot of deadly diseases, He had him pretty much process the whole thing quickly. The over beats of the story are still there, but I don’t know how well they work in his version.

So that’s it on the comments, I hope you enjoy the file.

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