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We discuss the increasingly bizarre obsession around “objects” being shot down in the sky, as well as the insane circumstance around the toxic event in Ohio (and we will have more on that later this week). Then, our annual review of the Super Bowl broadcast & advertising spectacle. Finally, we answer your Valentine’s day call-in questions!

And, a note from Felix:

Hey, this is Felix and I just wanted to get more eyes on my sister Lucy's incredible writing. she most recently put out this essay on the ephemeral and sad nature of devices in our lives that elucidates concepts that I have been struggling to articulate on the show. Please subscribe! thank you https://open.substack.com/pub/lucydiamondb/p/41-one-november-night-15-years-ago?r=3k2uk&utm_campaign=post&utm_medium=web

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Anonymous

I expected someone to photoshop the cube from the new Zelda trailer over Vancouver or some shit by now. very disappointed

Anonymous

someone probably already said it, but weather balloons change shape when they change altitude because of physics and shit

Anonymous

it’d be funnier to photoshop tingle from majora’s mask being obliterated by an f-22

Anonymous

hey, I'll take what I can get in terms of Tingle murder. not because I hate him, but because he's silly and that means anything that happens to him is inherently funny

M.R. Alchemist

It would be a pretty cool to have first contact at this exact moment in history.

Anonymous

Balloons distract from the fact that Ukraine lost the US's proxy war. Just kidding

etienne

"look we brought this one into a grudging standing war of attrition but trust me bro ... we can fuck up china whole shit if you just let us, this one is different"

Anonymous

Ron desuckdick

Mark Brian Wilson

Dear Chapo, I recently quit smoking and now feel a constant hum of anxiety that is pushing me towards a January 6th style act at my nation's capital. Given your experience being at the real Jan 6th, what kind of potential romantic partners can I expect to meet at said event? Or, how do I stop feeling like I am going to explode?

Yup

not me getting parenting advice from the dry boys

Anonymous

Wanted to throw out a piece of dating advice to non-sex-getters: if you go on a date, try to spend as much time, if not more, asking your date about their life/interests than talking about your own.

orc

Salvia Girlfriends is a great band name

Anonymous

Whelp, Matt was right about the balloons

J.P. McD.

Sister’s friend guy and anyone else with someone from the past or a DM buddy: stop overthinking it, just ask them if they wanna grab a drink. You don’t need confirmation or an elaborate plan. If you haven’t spoken in a while, DM them on some pretense and chat lightly a bit before you ask (it’s fine if this is broken up over a few days). Now the “date” itself might be scarier than it should be if you haven’t gotten your reps in on first dates from online, so start doing that ASAP if not. In most of these cases she is into you or will be if you’re decent to talk to.

J.P. McD.

I’d unironically recommend How to Win Friends and Influence People which taught me this at like age 10

etienne

yeah online date is like video game, it's understood that if you fuck up and get frag you can just load savegame ... uhh I mean just say sorry it doesn't work out and/or ghost

J.P. McD.

I def think of “grinding” swipes on the apps the same way that I thought of grinding out full seasons of NBA Live, and online poker tournaments. Dunno if I’m ND

Alal Alal

That steak talk was like 15min too long imo

Khemith

or be rich. People will listen to you all day if you're rich.