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Early release: "I Am So Bored" (Patreon)

Published:
2019-07-29 17:52:05
Imported:
2023-02

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Howdy everyone! A new story for you today that I'll be posting elsewhere later, but you wonderful people are first to the show. The title stems not at all from my own sentiments, but rather those of our protagonist, a mind controller overwhelmed with ennui who gives himself a challenge to spice things up. Remember, my early releases are first draft quality, so don't be surprised if there's some trouble spots. 

If you missed it [because Patreon makes such things easy to miss], be sure to check out all the discussions going on elsewhere on my page, particularly WDB's incredibly thorough and insightful breakdown of his thoughts on Our Time Was Now and TIOS as a whole, as well as a thread on your favorites of my body of work. I'm curious what people think! I do tend to write whatever I'm moved to write, but knowing what people like has a definite effect on guiding what moves me.

Have a great week everybody! Next up from me will be getting to the July free commission drawing, quite probably followed by the August. More to come!

Comments

WDB

Ice Bear: Aw, shucks, thanks! I'm mostly just doing all this to qualify for the "Brand Ambassador" achievement that I assume Patreon gives out, but I'm a fan of your writing, too! I don't know if I've mentioned that before. (On the topic of "things I probably should've mentioned a while ago": This is your page. I'm just a guest here. No one's coming here for me, they're coming here because of you. If at any time you feel like my comments are starting to distract or detract from what you're doing, *please* let me know and I'll gladly shut them down. I don't ever want to cause you any headaches.) Fellow Icicles: Hey, so, yeah! There's this Community tab where we can have non-story-specific discussions about all sorts of Ice Bear-related topics. Let's get some stuff going while we wait for the next story drop! Favorite ladies? Best protagonists? Funniest lines? Best character named DJ because I guess there's more than one somehow? Is Hailey a secret genius for using "pork sword" as a euphemism? Drop in on the Community tab and let's chatter!

WDB

What a great, fun story. The split perspective was a neat choice, Nikki's a terrific character, and it's all pretty goddamn hot. Excellent work! I really, really loved how structured it is as a story, how what could be a simple "mind-controller wants to fuck hot woman" short becomes this really tense narrative thanks to hard work and a warped dedication. (I sort-of feel like "standard MC trope, but so complicated that it becomes new again" is an Ice Bear hallmark.) Sure, Grant may be a little (okay a LOT) selfish and dismissive of others, but as Emma Stone put it in Maniac, "I'm not 'fucking crazy', I'm just goal-oriented."

Anonymous

This was mostly a pretty good story but the way the POV kept jumping between first and third person kept throwing me off. I felt that the transitions could have been smoothed out for a better reading experience.

WDB
>>25236996

I kept viewing it like the talking-head cutaways in The Office. Once that idea came to me, I was cracking up almost every time Grant would add his two cents.

Greenstar

I swear your stories just keep getting better and better. I agree with WDB, you take something standard and twist it around just enough to create a captivating story that is also absurdly hot. Thank you very much!

WDB
>>25228290

Okay, so, I thought about this story more (naturally). I really like Nikki's character. I thought Lindsey was charming and funny. I think I hate Grant. Am I supposed to hate Grant? I liked him for most of the story. His idea to handicap himself by only controlling everyone *except* the woman he wanted was a pretty funny MC version of a slumming rich person who lacks self-awareness cracking themselves up by eating one of these, "What did you call them, 'Big Macs'? How delightful!" He has a disgusting amount of privilege, but here he is, sleeves rolled up like the rest of us, making it on his own with only an inability to actually fail as his support. I found him funny, the way that he could convince himself that one disadvantage balanced out a hundred advantages. Even better, I liked that the whole concept for the story was just "dating, but with a mind-controller". Like, all of the things he did in the story were just amplified versions of what anyone does on a first date: you try to present a version of yourself that will most appeal to the person you're trying to impress, and you design an experience to get them to feel something for you. He helps Nikki out with her car, he dresses nice, he takes her to her favorite restaurant, they share stories, etc. Every single step of it is juiced with MC anecdotes (that are funny, or sexy, or funny AND sexy), but it's still the kind of shit nearly everyone's done on a first date. Going back to his place for drinks, again, pretty typical date move. Relax with a drink, get a little more flirty, it's still normal "getting them in the mood" maneuvers. But Nikki doesn't go as far as Grant wants, and he loses it. Just *loses* it. Takes control, insults and demeans her, feels *owed* more than he got because of all of the effort he put in. It's at this point that I realized I didn't like Grant. That maybe he's a tremendous asshole. That maybe I actually hate him. Because if everything up to this point is a heightened version of a normal first date, then Grant's reaction is every asshole who won't take No for an answer. Every asshole who feels that the work he put in, the way he didn't even stare at her tits as much as he wanted to, that all earns him sex. And, I swear, this is not going to be me bringing up consent in MC fiction again. *I swear*. (Nikki feels great about it, no one's harmed, etc etc.) It's not what happens at the end of the story that bothers me, it's *why* it happens. And even "bothers" isn't the right word, since I like the story a lot. It's a great story! I can hate a character and still love a story. And, y'know, I think I might hate Grant. I hate him for his privilege. Most other characters have an awareness of how lucky they are when they can use their powers/advantages to make things go their way. But when Grant can't get a woman he just met, who's incredibly attractive, who's going to have to see him again in a professional setting, to not fuck him on their first date, he feels robbed. Like, if he'd been bummed about how things hadn't gone his way and he fell back on his abilities out of laziness, sure. I can see all of that. But the way he made it Nikki's fault, that she was somehow being unreasonable for not fucking a guy she just met who's the father of one of her students... it's just a colossally shitty thing to do. It's petulant and gross. It's every asshole who feels entitled to sex. I don't know, like I said, it doesn't mean I disliked the story. I really enjoyed it! It was funny and clever. The turn in the end is, motivations aside, pretty hot. I don't think Grant being a terrible person means the story is any less good. It's mostly that his anger and entitlement left me intensely disliking him at the end of the story, and I'm not sure if that's intentional or accidental. Either way, I still really enjoyed the story and I appreciate it, as always, for having enough going on to get me thinking about it later.

icebear
>>25228290

Chiming in re: hating Grant, not to disagree, but rather to add that yeah, I kind of hated him all throughout. I felt like the way he treats Nikki at the end is basically how he infers he treats every other woman he meets throughout the story. i.e. essentially as toys. With Nikki, he'd simply hoped the toy would provide a different form of thrill, but when it didn't... back to the toybox. So yeah, totally agreed, he's a terrible person, but could suppress it for most of one date, and only for his own amusement.

WDB
>>25228290

What's so weird about it (if you don't mind me going on) is that, yeah, Grant treats *all* of the women in the story with, at best, total disregard. Every little aside is a window into a life spent using women for sex and entertainment, without much else on his mind. But the weird part is that I didn't judge him for those asides. Like I said before, they were all sexy or funny or sexy AND funny. Shit, him ragging on Ed Sheeran was a hero move, IMO. It's just, when he does the same shitty things to Nikki that he does to Lindsey and (presumably) Serena and Tara and Megan and on and on, *that* was the line for me. Suddenly it wasn't sexy shit done to a sextra, it was *cruelty* inflicted on a character that I was invested in. And that's not a judgment thing about this story, it's just something about the MC erotica genre that I find fascinating. That way readers can instinctively separate Sexy from Violation, all depending on how much goodwill a character may or may not have generated, or how much of the "before" we've seen of them. Obviously, with this genre, we *want* to see shit like this take place, right? The dominance, the control, that's part of the appeal of the fantasy, right? And for 75% of this story, I didn't judge Grant for his (demonstrably selfish and callous) actions... rrrright up until he did the same to a POV character. Is that weird? I don't know. I just got to thinking about that.

WDB
>>25241943

Part of me even viewed Grant's quest to find some new angle on his routine as a nod towards Ice Bear's tendencies as a writer. "Sure, a story *could* be about a mind-controller going after a woman he's attracted to, but what if he had to do it with only saying words that start with vowels? And he's allergic to a cat she takes with her everywhere?" These MC characters of Ice Bear's are the hardest-working MC characters in erotica!

Anonymous

I used to read something with this similar style of POV switching so it didn't bother me. I also love the added touch of how coach suddenly started to have a dirty mouth by the end. The slight resistance and justification adds a lot more depth and curiosity to what's happening to a character compared to just a droning person reduced to saying "I am your master/slave" Keep up the great work!

WDB
>>25271267

Oh, great point! Those little moments when Nikki's internal monologue gets switched up by Grant's control are *super* hot: Nikki couldn’t help herself; she rubbed her slit against his still-throbbing shaft as her hands guided his to her boobies. (Why had she called them “breasts” earlier? Ew. Her mother had raised her better than that.) Thanks for the reminder!