If you are self conscious (Patreon)

Let me tell you something I went through and how it played a big role in easing my self consciousness.

When I was in Hawaii I felt nervous because I haven’t shown skin since I was like a child. When I was sitting on the beach, there were a lot of half naked people in swimsuits with great bods. My partner and I would people watch and discuss how that girl had a really nice butt or how that guy had a nice v-line etc.

Then I realized that we were only checking out and talking about people who had rockin bods. And I also realize I’ve never in my life just looked at a stranger and ever judged them for being fat or wearing frumpy clothes, having acne, or a hair being a mess etc etc.

I’ve always been very self conscious, as I’m sure many people are but I realize I don’t go around judging other people for being fat so why am I assuming everyone else is? I mean the world is a shitty place and I don’t trust people but am I so egomaniacal that I think I’m the only good person in the world who doesn’t judge people negatively for their flaws?

It made me think deeper. If there ARE people who judge people for these things—why should I care? I mean people who go around and whisper bad stuff about a stranger just because of their appearance… only BAD PEOPLE would do that!

Here’s a different way to look at it: would you care what a Nazi thought about your appearance? Would you care what a racist or a serial killer thought about you? NO!

I realized that anyone who would think like that has to be a MAJOR asshole and beneath me so I said fuck it and started dressing stylish, even if it exposed skin and busted out the drip.

Not even 2 days later I was in my hotel walking to getting coffee and a woman was walking by me and looked at me and my drip and she complimented in such a wild way yelling like “OKAY I SEE YOU. THAT IS IT!”

I bring this up because I’ve also learned this from Kpop and Kingdom as well.

There is no such thing as ugly; there is only confidence.

Mullets used to be UGLY. Everyone said no. And now it’s a hotness.

I have good articulation because I didn’t want to be ridiculed for broken English. But look at Eunkwang on Kingdom. The man will speak all sorts of broken nonsense English but do we laugh and make fun of him and tell him to learn proper English? No. We laugh WITH him because he himself knows it’s not good but his confidence makes it endearing and funny. Dude look at BTOB as a group. They make “unattractive” faces ALL the time. Exhibit A:

Is BTOB called an “ugly group”? No. Look at Hongjoong! The bowl cut was a no-no but the more he performs with max confidence; the more I’m OK with it. That’s what happened with mullets!

Beauty comes from confidence.

I don’t know maybe this is obvious to everyone else but this helped me and hopefully it helps someone else too.

Remember, if ever you are worried “what will people think” just think “only a dickhead would judge me for x, and why should I care what some jabroni thinks”.