"I didn't do it!" (Patreon)

I'm not one to be star-struck. Back in a previous life, I actually interviewed celebrities pretty constantly, and the hard truth is, they're a bunch of working stiffs, just like the rest of us. Nice group. They're more eccentric than the average person, so that does make them somewhat interesting, even if only in a mildly iconoclastic kinda way. 

But, they collectively help to define a zeitgeist. And there are those faces, names, and lines we gather during our lives that kinda just remind us, for instance, of our favorite chunks of entertainment. 

 So, chalk it up to a cute kick in the butt while I'm on something of a nostalgic kick. 

I've been re-watching Better Call Saul in advance of the last half of season six. Great show, modern gothic American masterpiece. Michael McKean plays Charles McGill. No spoilers: wonderful actor, amazing performance. 

But when *I* was growing up, there was this movie that was released only one year after I was born. Clue. If you've seen it, cool. If you haven't, it's... a slapsticky little tale that's just stuffed with entendre, innuendo, death, violence... all the types of things that a budding mind mightn't need to be exposed to. 

I grew up in a pretty conservative household — we weren't whackos or anything; rather, many conversations were simply considered "inappropriate at the dinner table" — as did a lot of my friends in that part of the world at that time.

Perhaps it's because the movie was based off a family-friendly board game? But shit, Clue was a movie I was somehow permitted to watch! It cleared the familial censors, defied the household Hays Code, and was one of those tapes you were simply permitted to rent, time and time again, from Blockbuster. I guess it just flew under the radar.

Michael McKean played Mr. Green. Funny, funny, funny. "I had to stop her from ScReAmiNg...!" And this, in a movie that also contained Tim Curry, Madeline Kahn, Eileen Brennan, Martin Mull, Christopher Lloyd, good GOD, what a cast. But, Mr. Green always stuck out for me — shy, but always a little calculating, and in the end (well, one of them), he comes out ahead.

Fast forward. Twitter is new to me, so I'm not sure if any of this means shit. But, I'm snarky, and can't sleep just yet. So, I posted this:

It's a good message, I think. Why not establish such a day. 

And then, I got this!

MR GREEN SAID IM A NICE LADY!!!!1!! And only a few minutes later! (Get some sleep, Mike!)

I'm playing it cool, and not responding, of course. Because I don't want to be THAT person. 

But, it's still kinda neat. Aw. Like, isn't it? I got to make him feel a little bit better for a second, and he hit me back. (We're all feeling like shit right now, I'm convinced, so whatever we're able to do? Double Points if it's just something silly, silly, silly.)

So. If we're searching for a holiday, at any point, to replace one of the more antiquated ones... 

Why not dedicate it to... 

the idea of a dude who seems like a perfectly lovely fella, who writes, acts, plays guitar, has had his fair share of ups and downs I guess, just like we've all had, whose career spans six decades, probably has a wife and kids, cracks dumb jokes, has that one recipe he's really good at, and who... 

I dunno. I'm getting carried away here. I don't even know the guy.

Maybe... 

I'm just looking for something — anything, fucking anything! — in this world that I can just casually feel harmless warmth about, without fear that someone is gonna come out of the woodwork, saying, "WeLL DidN't yOu HeAr aBoUt tHe TiMe / YoUrE WrOnG tO sAy ThAt BeCaUsE" such-and-such. You know the type. People are argumentative these days. More than they used to be. And it gets to ya, you know?

Something unifying? A representative of a common experience? A decent person who's experienced a lot of fun shit, and has just kinda been content to be a fella who hits that stride where he can just go to the grocery store without being bothered too bad, and who is just content with the chance he has to make people laugh, or cry, or think, or whatever he likes. It's his job, and good on him. American dream at best, Good On Ya' at the least? I guess we're all looking for something on that spectrum.

We idolize actors in our society, because we aspire for the recognition, and comfort, and adoration, they receive. But, in the purest sense? They're supposed to be folks who just entertain you. That's the whole of it, you know?

In the modern age, we get to watch them again and again, and they get burned into our heads, and sometimes, the stars align, and they become global tropes that we share. Which is cool. But also pretty new. So aside from all that (and because of all that)? They're avatars for the things that are special to us. Ideas, funny lines, waypoints for comparison to our own experiences, context, context, context. 

Congrats, you lovelies! I have solidly gone off the rails, and you have more witness! So I'll wrap this up. Mr. Green said I was nice (I know, it literally took him like, a second, and he tweets constantly, so what's so special, blahblahblah...), which is just a silly bit of fun that my heart really needed this week. So, thanks, Mike. If I can call ya' Mike.  

I'm sure a lot of actors fit this bill, and deservedly so. But for me... why not:

How's about #MichaelMcKeanDay? I don't speak for the man, but it seems to me that he's not-not on board. Plus, he follows me, now! (I mean, I would. I'm witty! Witty as shit! Right? Right. Right!)

It won't stick today, this idea. But we've got a whole year to prepare for McKeanFest 2023. I'll bring This is Spinal Tap, you bring popcorn. 

El Fin.

On a completely unrelated note, if you're reading this, you've endured through some particularly long-winded Heather-ness! Wow! I imagine that you might actually be the only one! So, here's just a dumb picture of me wearing green, because I was talking about Mr. Green, and there's a theme here, (insert sushi/it's not salmon it's 'red herring' joke here), and you deserve it, bucko!