I Keep Accidentally Getting New Lovers! 02 (Patreon)

"Wanna go!?" Immediately a bloodthirsty smirk appears on my face, as a mysterious swordsman clashes her blade against Sekki. I don't know why she's attacking me, but I'm definitely fine with this.

She licks her lips, our eyes meet and I feel a shock run through my body. After it she continues on the offense, she's skilled. "I definitely do...!" In fact her style reminds me of a certain someone... "Show me what the pupil of my adorable little Iori can do!" Ah, I see now.

She's using the Fire Stance, so she must be Musashi Miyamoto. I'm guessing she heard of me since I took Iori as an apprentice after utterly trouncing him. After that I went back to pounding Suzuka of course.

Before long I take on the offense, and she switches to a more defensive stance, but it's too late. "Down you go!" Normally this would take a bit longer, but I am already used to Iori's different stances, which means I know how to counter her.

She falls on the ground, face filled with disbelief. "Eh? It's already over...? But I didn't even get the chance to spit on his eye as an distraction..." You were planning on doing that!? Well, I would do the same in your position.

Still, I can't let some girls spit on me! I have two girlfriends and one wife after all! And let's not even talk about all the concubines I have waiting for me back home. Isn't this harem expanding a bit too fast?

Someone enters the room, it's Iori and his face is filled with panic. "Wait master, you shouldn't fight sensei for no reason!" This hypocrite! "Ah, you already... you already lost..." He's watching his dawned master with a disappointed face.

Musashi blushes bright red. "Iori, please don't look at your father with a face like that. I will genuinely cry." She's clenching her swords with indignation. I think she never ever lost this quickly to someone before.

I sigh. "Hey Iori, wasn't she supposed to be... dead? Like actually gone?" At least that's what everyone told me, and they all seemed to miss her a lot too. So the fact that she's back is good, I'm just a bit confused.

Iori shrugs. "From what I know, yes. She suddenly returned however..." He smiles, it's clear that he does care about his father. "In the middle of our tearful reunion, I told her about you, and she ran off. Sorry Sensei." I wave him off, it's fine.

It only takes one glance to see that while Miyamoto Musashi and Miyamoto Iori may not be related by blood, they are certainly related by soul. Two little fighting maniacs... I'm the same of course, so I won't judge.

Musashi shrugs. "Eh, my resurrection was pretty lame. I met this guy who is supposedly a Love God, and then he told me it was kind of sad how I never felt the Cupid's Arrow and... Look, it's all dumb mumbo jumbo." Now that she's recovered, she gets up.

She then points her sword at me. "What isn't dumb mumbo jumbo is the fact that our duel isn't over yet Yato Shibata. Watch your back, 'cause I'll keep coming over and over again!" What's with this delinquent!?

I smirk. "If you really want to get beaten up again and again that's fine. Masochist." Besides I will be learning from her too.

Chaldea really is a wonderful place. I don't care if it's a Beast, a Type or an Alien God, it's under my protection. It has both cute girls and strong people after all.

...

"Here it comes Musashi!" To be honest I'm tired of cumming over and over again, but since she's so kindly deepthroathing my dick, I have no option but to cum down her throat. This woman is insatiable!

And also deadly, because the moment I feel the pleasure of release, one of her swords appears in her hand, she aimes at my neck, hoping she can take it clean off with one strike. I parry it of course, with my own sword.

After it both of swords disappear, and she releases my dick from her mouth, which she opens. "Ahhh..." This is a classic, she's essentially trying to show that she swallowed it all like a good girl.

And then she closes it and clicks her tongue. "Tsk, failed again huh..." She's talking about her attempts at killing me just now of course. She has tried this multiple times just today, which is why I always know how to defend against it.

You see... the reason why even I am getting tired of cumming... is because Musashi essentially trained herself into being the greatest whore ever, probably even better tham the likes of Ishtar or whatever.

The reason for that is that she's trying to distract me with sex so that she can beat me. So right now she's completely and utterly soaked in cum, and I have pretty much used her body in all ways imaginable.

To give you an idea, right now the scratch marks on her thighs count to fifty-three. They are only counting her pussy of course, and also only counting today. I'm beginning to think she's not even trying to kill me, I think she might be just a perv...

Musashi smiles in my direction. "So which way do you want to use me next...?" Having such an attractive woman saying that while absolutely covered in my cum is certainly enough to immediately make me hard again.

I take a moment to think. "I want to fuck your pussy again, it's the best." She always rides me so enthusiastically. I must repeat, I think she's just a massive perv lying about her true intentions.

With practiced easy, she gets on top of me, and inserts my dick inside of herself. "Ahhh~... There it is..." At this point her body must consider unusual to not be pleasing my cock, which may be why it so desperately milks me.

The swordswoman begins to ride me like the perv that she is. "Hey Musashi, does this mean I'm now Iori's dad? Or mom? Or second dad?" I never had a son before! Rin is gonna kill me for getting married and then getting a son.

Musashi is hugging me as she moves, to be honest it's kind of icky, considering her current state. "Don't be silly~...! Ooooh~! We are just rivals...! Yeah, I'm just settling our duel right now~!" Um... I still think you're a pervert.

But maybe she's a pervert who doesn't like me. "So you aren't my girlfriend? I guess you don't love me huh..." I can't complain. I still have Scáthach, Suzuka and Jeanne. All who like me consensually too!

Musashi nods. "Yes, I'm not your girlfriend~! You're the only man who I will have sex with, you're the only man I want to kiss, and you're the only man I want to fight against and beside... But I'm not your girlfriend~! Ahhhh~!" I cum inside of her yet again.

I parry her blow, she asks me what I want next. It's a cycle I'm getting used too...

So she will be exclusively mine, and she never denied loving me... But she's not my girlfriend, just my rival. Is this what they call a Situationship!?

I Yato Shibata, have two girlfriends, one wife, one situationship, and a harem of concubines.



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"Tell me, how did this happen Yato Shibata?" Her cold eyes gase at my head wound as she clears them. I heard she was some nutjob who I should avoid, but Nightingale is taking her job completely seriously right now.

I awkwardly smile, I just now she won't like this... "I wanted to test my endurance and skill, so I asked a bunch of my lovers to aim their Noble Phantasm at me." I managed to dodge most of them, but Musashi almost got a clean hit.

It damaged by my spirit origin, whatever that means. And so Master said it wouldn't naturally heal, and that I should seek medical help. She also recommends Asclepius, but he's busy right now healing Musashi after my other lovers had their revenge.

It's a bit unfair to be honest, since it was my idea.

Nightingale's face was basically already set in a frown before, but now it gets worse. "I see, so you're an idiot. Do not do such a thing again, or I'll have no choice, but to remove your limbs. For your own good of course." Hmmm...

My smile turns genuine. "Makes sense to me, I won't do it anymore!" I probably will, but I understand that she means well. Besides, her logic is solid, I won't try getting better with a sword if I can't hold one.

Her eyes widen, as she shows emotion for the first time. "Good." She's probably surprised because most warriors argue back, what she doesn't know of course is that I'm too stupid to keep my word.

However, she took my words as an opportunity to scold me. "What were you even thinking? Campione you may have been while alive, but now you're a servant, so be more careful." Yeah, yeah, I know...

She continues. "I care not for your life, so throw it away if you so desire, but make sure to remain in perfect physical and mental health while doing so." I-I don't think that makes sense...

I chuckle. "Hah, well I care about all three, so don't worry. It's just that I'm a bit stupid... Here's an example, there was this one time I started fighting the wind 'cause I thought it was an invading enemy!" I won of course.

"Excuse me?"

She's excused. "Oh, and there's this girl I know who used to be called a cow, because she's really well endowed, but I embarrassingly thought she was a real cow..." Ah, I miss Luvia. That Astrea goddess is just not the same person.

"What?"

She wants to keep hearing my tales huh? That's fine, talking about them has been kind of fun! "Um... So there was this time my friend wanted to know how strong I was, and I didn't know. So to test my endurance and my strength at the same time I punched myself so hard I passed out." I used to hate that memory, but now it's mostly funny.

Nightingale is looking at me as if I was an alien. "Yato Shibata, I must learn something. Please accept my questions." I nod, she can ask away! "You are not a Berserker yes? And you do not contain Madness Enhancement, yes?" I'm pretty sure you have both of those.

I send her a thumps up. "I'm just a good ol' Saber! And yeah, I don't have Madness Enhancement or any other mental skill of the same type! This brain is all natural...!" I probably shouldn't feel as proud of this fact as I do.

Nightingale put both of her hands on my shoulder. "Yato Shibata, you are sick, perhaps you have been sick since you were born." E-eh!? "From now on, you must come here everyday. I promise to heal you one way or another." O-okay...?

Can she tell what's my sickness though!? Like, do I have cancer or something!?

...

"I don't really get how this is part of my treatment..." Not that I'm against it of course. Thrusting my hips against her ass feels amazing, and taking a nurse doggy style is a dream come true... It's jusf that this is a bit weird.

Nightingale tries to respond with her usual emotionless attitude. "Oh~. It's simple, I have realized your intellect rises when... when~... you are having sex~." How though!? It's not like you ever saw me having sex...

This just sounds like an excuse to be a pervert, just like with Musashi. "T-that's why...! That's why we should have as much sex as possible~!" She's slowly losing control of herself. "And then perhaps the effects will... aaaahh~... become permanent." That sounds like a bunch of bull to me!

I slowly extend one hand. "That would sound convincing, but..." And put that hand on her mouth, which confirms my suspicions. "Why is it that you're tongue is out, Nightingale?" Sex with my lovers has taught me that this is prime bitch behavior.

She responds with panting. "It's just... just a natural body reaction. My female body is desperately milking a man's cock, because it believes~...! It believes it can get pregnant~!" For real? That's your excuse.

I roll my eyes. "Just be for real already. Do you want to become my lover, Nightingale?" I assume yes, considering she's basically begging me for my cum. I'm willing to oblige of course.

Her sweaty body trembles. "Negative~. I do not wish to be your lover... Yes, my body~... my body is desperately begging for your seed~... and I desperately want to carry your child~... but that's all part of the treatment. Cum whenever you please~." I...

Screw it, I push my dick farther in, and finally give her the seed she's been begging for. "Okay then, fuck the stupidity out of me!" Even if she doesn't want to be my lover, I still want her.

Her body spasms, cumming. "Ooohhh~!" And then she falls to the ground, trying to recover her strength. "Yato Shibata... you... you are sick..." She's muttering, because that's all she can do right now.

I raise an eyebrow. "Yeah, and...?" She already explained the treatment to me. I guess I should just take her word as a doctor already and accept that I can get smarter if we have a bunch of sex.

She smiles, with a blush on her face. "I shall retire from my position in Chaldea. It is clear that you have special needs and need a fulltime nurse. Which is why I'll be taking care of you for the resf of our lives, I am now exclusive yours, my dearest patient." She doesn't even leave me room to deny her.

Still, what she says sounds awfully like marriage with extra steps... Is this another situationship!?



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With one slash of Sekki I cut down all the audio boxes, finally ending this hell that is called a concert. "Who the hell let this happen?" Probably the girl that was singing in the first place.

Speaking of her, she's now right in front of me, pointing at my chest. "What the hell you think you're doing!? I was pleasing my adoring audience!" Her adoring audience could not move to leave, since they were blinded by the pain.

I smile, trying to de-escalate the situation. "Sorry it's just that my nurse says I should always try my best to take care of my mental health, and your music was making me suicidal." Thankfully I managed to put a stop to it.

Her eye twitches. "But that type of music is supposed to make people happy! I wasn't aiming to make people sad...! So listen to it again and I'll heal your depression!" I rather give up on fighting and sex than listen to that absolute garbage again.

I now realize she didn't mean any harm however, so I'll try to be nice. "Oh, don't worry, you conveyed the tone of the song pretty well." A compliment, and then a strike. "It's just that it was so painfully bad that it made me remember how sinful and disgusting humanity can be. For a moment I almost carved my own ears out." Yep. Nice.

I nod to myself with a polite smile. "I think maybe you should give up on singing and become an idol, since all people care about in that industry is if a girl has a sexy body." I hope she takes my criticism and improves.

She flinches. "B-but I'm already on the idol industry...!" Oh? Good then, sorry I bothered you. "W-wait a minute, don't think I'll just let you insult my career like that! Specially after ruining my concert!" it was self-defense.

Geez, she sure is getting heated. "It wasn't a insult, it was constructive criticism. I just wanted you to know that your music is the fear of all that have fear, and that you should use your body to become popular." Okay, maybe I'm being a bit spiteful. In my defense... Nightingale will have a tough time healing my mental health after this concert.

She grits her teeth. "That's not... that's no constructive criticism at all!" She stomps the ground, leaving a dent on the floor. "Who the hell you think you are anyways!?" A guy who just wanted to live another day.

I raise a hand. "I'm Yato Shibata. Sorry for ruining your concert, it's just that the music was really bad. You have a cute personality though, so don't give up on the idol industry." I respect the grind.

She blushes. "Don't go complimenting me after those comments you... you rat!" And then her eyes widen. "Wait... Yato? You're that super pervert who has tons of girlfriends! H-have you come here to steal my idol purity!?" That does sound kind of hot.

Sadly I lack the authority right now. "Actually I have two girlfriends, one wife, and two situationships." I don't know if she knows what that means. "And no, I'm not here to have sex with you. Because Master would get mad." Damn you Shiro...! Those Command Seals are basically slavery! That's bad!

Okay, even I can tell I'm being a hypocrite.

She pouts and crosses my eyes. "Whatever Rat. Just be aware that my name is Elizabeth Bathory and you're forever forbidden from entering my concerts." As Jeanne would say... a blessing from the Lord!

Still, now I'm feeling bad. "Look... sorry that I destroyed your concert, it's just that it was really, really bad! I hope you improve!" Maybe she just needs a better producer, or better vocal chords! Everything is possible here on Chaldea!

There's tears in the corner of her eyes. "I get it, okay!?" She looks away. "You're all lucky I don't go back to being evil...! Or you would all get it!" She then slumps. "I can't deny what you've been saying though... my popularity just keeps falling and falling." Oof, that sounds bad.

I pat her on the head. "I'll be cheering for you." I will also be leaving immediately, which is why I tense my legs. I have to go have sex with Nightingale so I can feel human again.

Sadly however, Eli holds me by the sleeve. "Oh no Rat, you aren't leaving that easily... Do you know how much QP this all cost? Let me tell you, it wasn't cheap. And you ruined it all, so pay it back." Oh shit.

I gulp. "S-sorry, but since I'm part of the farming squad, all my money goes to Master's wallet..." She's cruel and has no mercy. Though I guess I could beg my lovers for some cash.

Elizabeth growls, her eyes empty. "You..." And then her eyes widen. "Are surprisingly popular with the ladies... the one demographic I can't attract." Oh no. "Yato, I know how you can pay me." But I don't dance.

That's a lie, I'm the best dancer in the entire world!

...

"I just don't get it! Why am I not getting popular!?" Probably because we essentially turn off both the male and female demographic by working together? People keep saying that a male idol working with a female idol is just asking for NTR.

I kiss her neck. "I dunno. You're great, and your music improved a lot." Thankfully she's already naked, so playing with her will be easy. I can't put it in though, 'cause an idol needs to be a virgin.

Also because Eli is just scared of taking the next step, and started crying when I tried, so I felt and apologized a bunch. She sort of reminds me of how I used to be, before I trained with Shiro.

Her eyes gain a wonderful gleam to them. "R-really!? You really think you're getting better!?" And then that gleam slowly disappears. "You're not lying right? I hate when people praise me for no reason." Talk about a yandere switch.

This time I lick one of nipples, her whole body trembles. "I can't say, everything you say nowadays sounds like beautiful music to my ears." I really don't want to give up on being an idol though, because it lets me spend time with her.

She covers her face. "Yato... First you became my partner, and then you saw my Reverse-Scale, and now this..." She squeals. "I..." By the way the scale incident happened when she showed me her naked butt.

She takes a deep breath and shows me her face again. "Yato, I decided to become you exclusive Eli-Chan. So let's get married...!" Oh!? I acquired a second wife!? Just like that!? That sounds awesome, but...!

I shake my head. "No way. I won't let you give up so easily! Because I know you love being the center of attention!" I smile. "I will still take the marriage proposal though." Rin will genuinely rip my intestines out.

Eli giggles in disbelief. "Yato you... Fine... I guess I'll continue being an idol... But I will also marry you." Good! "Which means I'm a shameless idol." She pushes me away out of nowhere.

And then she spreads her legs, and with both hands spreads her pussy. "So... so make sure I always go up stage filled with cum." We really did turn into the idol couple they thought we would, didn't we!?

She slowly looks away. "B-but don't impregnate me. You can't ruin my body just yet..." It's true that such action would ruin Eli's career.

But... "Elizabeth, you're a servant, you can't get pregnant." Why do I need to keep reminding people of that!?

Her eyes widen. "Oh! That's true! At least be gentle though." I pounce like an animal, not being gentle at all and ruining this idol forever.

Huh, I now have two girlfriends, two wives, and two situationships. Isn't my consensual harem becoming bigger than my concubine one!?