A Hundred Girlfriends Who Really Love You... In Another World! 42 (Patreon)

"Isn't our little village wonderful Subaru? It's the type of place a man could settle down and build a family, don't you think?" Mamagumin asks me with a smile. To be honest... building a family here sounds like a nightmare.

Sure the Crimson Demons are all perfect little angels that need to be cherished and protected, but they're also very high energy, too high energy even. I have a feeling that I would go insane if I lived in here.

Megumin sputters, I guess she's too shy to even think about building a family. "M-mom...! Don't say things like that! Urgh, I just knew you were going to be like this when you suggested this trip..." By trip she means that her mom is showing me the village.

Right now though it's just Yuiyui, Megumin, Komekko and I. That's because the rest of our comrades, and Papagumin decided to... take a nap. Yeah, this is obviously a scary situation which is why I couldn't say no.

Yuiyui pats her daughter's head. "My aren't you and your teenage rebellion adorable! Daughters are adorable." Why are you saying it like that...? "In fact, Komekko please imagine that Subaru is your papa and say something lovable and iconic." Aren't you being a little too forward!?

Komekko looks me in the eyes, which immediately makes me feel guilty. "Papa! I love you! Even when everyone says you're scum that can't match up to grandpa, you're still my hero!" Oi, my heart just melted. How does she know!? Don't tell me Hyoizaburoo is going through similar things as me! That makes me feel even more guilty! "Kay, I did it. Reward time!" She extends her open hand.

This cute little gremlin that I call my daughter is too cute... Ah, aren't both of my daughters adorable? And so is my beautiful wife... Which is why I put a coin in Komekko's hands. "Here, take good care of it." Wait! What the hell am I thinking!? MMT and KMT certainly are not my daughters!

Komekko immediately pockets it. "Yay!" And then she runs back to her mother, her mission completed I suppose. Ah, I'm a weak man, I need to leave this village before I abuse this soulmate stuff and cuck Hyoizaburoo.

Yuiyui's eyes are open wide. "H-hey, that's a bit much for a casual reward, don't you think Subaru...?" I just gave her one coin... Admittedly it's very shiny, so maybe it's worth a lot? Again, I don't really know much about the currency of this world.

Honestly, it's already a miracle that this village even accepts money from the Central Continent, probably because they're weirdos and want to collect all types of cash or something. So I'll just happily accept this... still, I wish Lalatina was here to reign in my spending.

I wave Mamagumin off. "It's fine Miss Yuiyui, it's pocket change really, I have way more." Still, I'm now sort of learning Nanahoshi had given me way more than I thought, and that I scammed those casinos for way more than I thought as well. I guess that explains the bounty hunting...

Megumin crosses her arms, an angry pout on her face. "Geez, I wish there was a loaded dumbass around when I was a kid. Why does Komekko get this privilege, but I don't?" You're genuinely jealous of your little sister!? She's like half your age!

Yuiyui shushes her. "Now, now daughter of mine, do not speak to your papa like that." And then while her daughter is stunned, she walks over to me and gets a grip on my arm. "You know, this may sounds bad, but money is super attractive." I understand that, but please stop tempting me!

Megumin gasps. "Mom!? Since when did Subaru become dad!? Did I miss such an important cutscene or something!?" Apparently so did I! This is too heavenly to complain about though...

Mamagumin giggles. "Of course he's not your father silly, I'm just teasing..." She sends me a blushing smile. "I love to tease a man..." Ma'am you are married! Please remember that before you take my heart!

Megumin dashes to my other side, and hugs that other arms, she then starts trying to futilely save me from her mother. "L-let him go...! I'm telling this to dad if you don't!" I...! I have an angel in each arm! Heaven! Hellish heaven!

Yuiyui rolls her eyes. "What a loser daughter I have raised, this is why you don't have a boyfriend." Megumin recoils as if struck, probably because Mamagumin just hit her with what might as well be the word version of Explosion Magic.

But she endures. "A-and you married a complete loser who sells broken stuff!" That's your dad, so please don't talk shit about him like that!

Komekko suddenly raises an arm. "Dad doesn't sell broken stuff though! They all do what they're supposed to do!" Huh...? "It's just that dad purposefully puts bad stuff on them sometimes! Like the Dragon Sword Reid replica!" He made that death trap!?

Yuiyui nods. "Indeed, your dad does exactly what he aims to do! And he's an amazing man Komekko... However, maybe you should find... erm... other figures to look up to." Don't say that about your husband while holding onto my arm!

And to my surprise Megumin nods too. "Yeah Komekko. Even trying to become Kazuma is better... Even trying to become Purge King is better." I'm lower than him huh? That's to be expected I suppose, but it still hurts.

Komekko shakes her head. "I don't want to become like nobody else! I just wanna be me!" A-ah! She's so adorable that I almost forgot that I'm sandwiched between mother and daughter, who also happen to be Gumins...!

She then puts her open hands on her hips. "Actually I do wanna be someone else! I wanna be a princess!" You're already a princess in my heart. Screw this soulmate thing, I'll kill any man who tries to corrupt this creature, including me.

Yuiyui sighs. "Komekko... I already told you that we don't have enough money to buy that dress..." And then she smiles. "Just wear Megumin's old used princess clothes instead! Like usual!" And now Komekko looks like she wants to cry...

I raise an eyebrow. "So what's up with this princess thing?" I don't know what is the source of KMT's tears, but it must be destroyed no matter the cost!

Megumin chuckles. "It's just a stupid line of dresses they sell from the Central Continent... It actually comes from Seven Stars' company, and it's crazy expensive." Well, she does sell luxury goods. "And as for my princess thing... I once wanted to be a princess, and then dad made a dress out of leaves for me." That's... nice of him?

But if the problem is that easy to fix...

...

Yuiyui shouts. "Komekko stop running around! You're gonna ruin the dress... and that thing better last for your entire life!" Actually she will probably outgrow it soon, I mean she is very young. Also it's fine, it's a gift I bought for her after all, so she can do whatever she wants with it.

Megumin's eye twitches. "Seriously, why didn't I have a big brother who spoils me rotten? What did Komekko do to deserve this that I didn't?" A smile then appears on her face. "Though I guess she does deserve this sort of thing once in a while..." She deserves everything! Because she's KMT!

Yuiyui nods. "Indeed... if only your father was a responsible man that could actually attend our families needs." Please go to couple counseling! "Thankfully we have this..." She grasps me even tighter. "Amazing man here!" Stop seducing me by existing!

Megumin pouts, at this point she's not even complaining about Yuiyui holding me. "Hey, dad tries his best. I mean, he's following his passions right? That's the Crimson Demon way..." And he did make a weird forest dress for you apparently.

Yuiyui hums. "Indeed, your father is following his passion of building cursed items that only one person in the entirety of Belzerg buys." That's real sad...! "And speaking of passions and the Crimson Demon ways..." Why do I have a bad feeling about this?

She send Megumin a blank look. "What do you think is mine?" Putting people to sleep? Being smoking hot? Making me hope that MMT grows up to look like you? There are many options really...

But the Arch Mage seems stumped. "I don't... really know. I mean, you're always just sort of... going alont with whatever dad does. And you're not the screaming type either." Yeah, it seems both Megumin and Komekko solely inherited Hyoizaburoo genes for example.

Yuiyui gigiles. "Well, if you don't know, you don't know." You're just gonna leave it up in the air!? "Anyways dear, do you have any specific place you want to show Subaru?" Honestly, I doubt anything could impress me at this point.

I have walked a decent while in this village, and if I learned something, is that if it's chuuni they have it. Seriously there was a sword of legend just... randomly in the ground for example. And there used to be a Dark Goddess sealed in this village solely because they thought it was cool.

Megumin is back to being pouty, how adorable. "Well, I wanted to show him the school grounds, but I can't do it with my mom following me around... that would be totally lame." Please never abandon teenage rebellion. I might cry for what it was lost if you do.

Yuiyui raises an eyebrow. "And why would that be lame...? I attended Red Prison when I was young too you know?" You guys call your school a prison? Who am I kidding, what else would these chuunis call it?

Megumin huffs. "It would be lame because hanging around with parents is lame, my ex-classmates would make fun of me." Ah, the classic... "Also, I was planning to show Purge King myself wearing the academy uniform, but you're too old to wear it. It would totally ruin the vibe." And so the Gumin digs it's own hole...

I feel like my arm might break if Mamagumin grips it any tighter... "Ah? I'm old? Ah? I'm old?" She repeated it!? "First of all, if I wore my old uniform... it would be super tight around my body indeed, I could easily take this man to bed wearing it." Don't even say that, now I'm imagining...

Megumin looks horrified. "Mom!? You have been acting really weird around Purge King, please stop...!" Right, there's also that. I can't exactly blame Yuiyui, because I know she's my soulmate, but her daughter is definitely not privy to that information.

Her mom tilts her head. "Oh, of course I'm not gonna do that Megumin, it's just a hypothetical." She then whispers on my ears. "It really would tear super easily though... It's a memento of my innocent school years, so wouldn't it be fun to ruin it?" I must not get a boner. I must not!

She then looks back to her daughter. "By the way, for calling me old, you deserve a punishment." So she really did get mad about that huh?

I smile, and fail to control my mouth. "It's fine Miss Yuiyui, you look just as beautiful as your daughter." You also look a lot more taken than your daughter! Seriously Subaru Natsuki, why are you flirting with a married woman!?

She blushes as red as her eyes and looks away. "What a gentleman... and I know you mean it too, since you're always sending me enchanted looks." Sorry, it is true, I have been perving on you.

Megumin gasps. "P-Purge King!? Please don't say stuff like that! Just let her self-esteem die, and then she can fix it on a midlife crisis or something!" You are the daughter every mother wishes they had. Truly.

Mamagumin chuckles. "It's funny you put it that way daughter of mine, because you see, a midlife crisis would imply I'm at the middle of my life. However, as Subaru has clearly said, I'm a flower who challenges you." I can't lie and say you are not.

Megumin begins sort of silently muttering. "What kind of mother compares herself to her teenage daughter? Yeah, she's definitely having a midlife crisis." She then glares at her. "Mom, look... can you just let go of Purge King's arm already? You're married, and people have been giving us strange looks..." Every look from a Gumin is strange.

Yuiyui pouts. "I will not let go of this gentleman. People are just weirded out because for once, I'm actually spending money, for once I get to treat my cute daughters that I love." I bought Komekko one dress though... And I didn't buy Megumin anything.

Still, I guess I can sort of understand being frustrated over not being able to buy the things your children want... Actually, I can't understand it at all, mostly because I have no children of course.

And my own parents never struggled financially as well, so it's not like I exactly needed for anything... Ah, I don't even want to think of what my dad would say if he saw me in a situation like this.

Megumin rolls her eyes. "You're talking like Purge King is the richest man on the planet." You were comparing me to a loaded old man a moment ago. "But he's not, that's just something I told everybody so you all would leave him alone. Purge King doesn't even have a house." Ah! My feelings, they are being crushed mercilessly!

Yuiyui's eyes widen. "Is that... is that true?" Ah, I have a feeling all her dreams are suddenly dying! Sorry to disappoint a Gumin, but everything that your daughter just said is completely true.

I nod. "Yeah, I actually live in the academy dormitories... I don't have a house, and the only reason I'm even trying to start a company is because..." My true love comes to mind. "Because I'm engaged now, and I need to provide for my future family. I don't care if I have to grovel and beg for it, or work harder than anyone else, my fiancee will have a happy life." And for that I need money.

Megumin glares at me for some reason. "Oi Purge King, you were supposed to look less cool just now, so why did you decide to aim for a triple S ranking?" I just confessed to being a homeless bum, that was super uncool.

Her mother is actually drooling. "I might lose control..." What is that supposed to mean!? "I guess we should go back home then... I'm seriously at my limit." You seriously need to explain yourself!

She then glares at her daughter. "But before that, it's punishment time!" Are you some sort of murder bear!? "Here's some trivia, all Crimson Demons have a strange tattoo they're born with, and Megumin's happens to be on her butt!" I have a boner in public. It simply cannot be helped.

Megumin sputters. "D-don't go shouting that in the middle of the street!" And then her eyes shine bright crimson. "A-and you have one on your womb, so shut up!" If this keeps up I might die...

Suddenly I'm broken free by a true angel. "Um... Subaru." Komekko is trying to get my attention, and her please have also calmed down Megumin and Yuiyui. That's the power of being adorable I suppose.

She's holding a little flower, which she offers to me. "When I grow up... let's get married!" Ah, now I'm being attacked by three Crimson Demons. Though the last one is clearly a different type of attack.

Megumin and Yuiyui free my arms, and so I grab the flower with one, and then pat her hand with the other. "Of course Komekko." I don't plan on marrying her at all, but saying anything else would make her cry.

She smiles. "Okay! Later on I'm gonna make a written contract, so you can't go back on your word!" That's a bit too much! "If you do, I'll summon thousands of demons and engulf the world in eternal darkness! I'll become the Crimson Demon of Envy!" That's definitely too much! Still adorable though.

Mamagumin giggles. "Oh, aren't kids adorable? If only there was a way to become the father of a few while skipping the annoying phase of taking care of babies..." Ma'am, please stop! "It would be pretty crazy right? Having a teenager calling you papa..." I repeat my previous thoughts!

Megumin's face is bright red. "Why am I getting so teased today!? What did I do!?" Nothing, you're just as perfect as always my little angel. The truth is that I'm the one at fault here...

Following Yuiyui into the city was a mistake, I shouldn't be giving one of my soulmates if I want their love to die. That's why once I go back... I'll completely cut contact with Megumin's family!

Or at least I'll try. Komekko is too cute, please nerf her.

/////////////////////////////////////////////////

"We're back...!" Mamagumin's eyes widen in surprise. "O-oh, I see you all are awake already..." They weren't napping were they!? You were totally expecting them to be under your spell still...

Wolbach grins as she takes a sip of her tea. "Indeed we are." Ah, of course she wouldn't be able to put the goddess of sloth to sleep permanently. My fiancee could have probably woken up at anytime, in fact she most definitely could.

Aqua shrugs. "It was weird that everyone decided to take a nap at the same time in the first place, I decided to just go with the flow." I see, magic didn't even affect this dumb goddess, but she saw everyone napping and decided nap as well.

Komekko runs to her dad's arms. "Look papa! I'm a princess now...!" No...! She's calling another man her father! Actually, that is her real father. As I thought, hanging around Yuiyui is way too dangerous.

Hyoizaburoo laughs as he pats her head. "You were always a princess Komekko!" He then looks at his wife. "Okay, so was it you or Megumin who decided to sell their body to buy this?" What kind of comment is that!?

Megumin looks down. "I already regret coming back here so, so much..." Today has been terrifying to you, hasn't it? Well, I'll eventually do something to apologize, so don't worry and just forget the trauma best buddy.

Darkness chuckles. "I for one think it's charming. You have a great family Megumin." Of course you of all people would think that. Please remove your opinions from this room as fast as possible.

Yuiyui ignores them and responds to her husband. "Oh dear, nothing of the sort happened. Subaru simply bought the dress our daughter wanted so much, but couldn't have it. By the way, did the debt collectors show up?" Angelic debt collectors...

He sends me a thumbs up. "Thanks for that Purge King! I appreciate it a ton!" I apologize for my numerous sins. "And yes dear, they did show up, but then we told them of the Purge Kind, and they decided to come back later to have a cooler confrontation scene." As always, the Gumins are wonderful.

She nods. "I see, I see. Now..." She looks at her daughter. "Now Komekko, why don't you go play outside for a moment? Papa and I need to have a... important talk." Why is it that my survival instincts are screaming?

Komekko pouts. "I just got back though...! I won't go unless Purge King goes to play with me too! Oh, and Chomusuke! Oh, and Big Sis! Oh, and Miss Darkness! Oh, and the cool drunken lady!" That's our entire party though! Well, I'm willing to go of course.

Megumin sighs. "Well, let's go then." And MMT is on the same wavelength as me. Anytime with KMT is precious and should be throughly cherished after all.

Yuiyui clears her throat. "Actually Megumin, you should stay... you're old enough to hear this. Also, Darkness and Wolbach should stay as well..." She looks at the Water Goddess. "Can you go play with her Aqua?" I don't know if I should let Aqua unsupervised with children...

Komekko looks away. "No! I won't leave unless I either have a full party, or someone with scary eyes buys me tons of food." I already did that though...! Still, what kind of conversation does your mother even want to have?

Aqua might secretly be a genius, because she gets up and runs away from the house. "If Komekko doesn't follow me, she's a loser!" The little girl immediately follows her. I guess I owe Aqua one...? At least she has cleansed herself of one of her sins, I guess...

Hyoizaburoo laughs. "Ah, how adorable... I truly do love my family." He then looks at his wife. "So what do you need Yuiyui? It is rare for you to start such a meeting." That's probably a bad sign for a couple.

Ah, I'm on the ground. "I can't take it anymore...!" I'm on the ground because Yuiyui jumped onto me, hugging me, and I fell. "I can't take living like this Hyoizaburoo! Subaru here stolen my heart and now I can't live without him!" O-oi...!

She's crying, very exaggeratedly at that. "I want a divorce! I don't want to be with you anymore...! Both my body and soul yearn for... for... for this true man!" Ma'am... You truly are Megumin's mother.

And speaking of MMT... "Mom... what?" She might be selectively erasing a few memories of her soon.