Sexually Harassing Heroines 05 (Patreon)

"I'm calling them Fire Emblem because they're obviously from Fire Emblem!" The stranger's eye twitched. "Unless they're like... cosplayers or something." That sounded kind of funny to the stranger.

Yuuma tilted his head. "Cosplayers...? What are you yapping about, man?" He obviously knew what a cosplayer was.

And if he was back in his world, Lucina and Celica would definitely look like cosplayers. However, in this world their clothes didn't really stand out at all. It was Yuuma who looked like a weirdo since he hadn't bought new clothing yet.

Lucina interject. "I am... equally as confused. What do you mean by from Fire Emblem?" She had been a bit excited when the stranger mentioned that legendary treasure.

That excitement had quickly died out when she realized Celica clearly didn't know what a Fire Emblem was due to the expression on her face, and that this stranger talked about the Fire Emblem as if it was some location.

The stranger grit his teeth. "I mean that you guys...!" He then took a deep breath and stared at Yuuma. "Nevermind, you know exactly what I'm talking about, don't you?"

As both Lucina and Celica immediately looked at Yuuma he could only flinch. "I don't though!?" He just knew he was losing Celica and Lucina affection points, even though he had done nothing to deserve that!

Right now. He had done nothing to deserve that right now.

The stranger clicked his tongue. "Well, I understand why you would want to keep this under wraps. I have read enough cringe fanfiction during my lifetime after all." Why was he suddenly confessing to his greatest sins!?

He continued. "Still to think there was a cheat as cool as this...!" He stomped the ground. "Fucking Aqua!" For a second Yuuma wondered if he was talking about the Aqua he knew.

He then decided he didn't really care. Besides, even if he was talking about the same Aqua, he too appeared to dislike her. Furthermore, the cheat part of this little conversation was clearly more important.

Yuuma tilted his head. "Cheat huh? So you're just like me..." He chuckled a bit. "I guess I should have figured that out by appearance alone. Anyways, let me introduce myself, since we will probably be working together in the future."

He wouldn't make a party with a guy, but he didn't mind working together with people. It also helped that this guy probably had some super broken ability that could come in handy. Alternatively, he had some broken ability Yuuma really didn't want to go against.

So he extended his hand. "My name is Yuuma Abe. These two are my companions as I'm sure you know. Also, they really don't have Fire Emblem in their name." One day they would have Abe in their name!

Lucina nodded, though she glared at Kazuma all the way. "Indeed." She was still trying to work out the Fire Emblem thing, so naturally she was incredibly suspicious of this man.

Celica smiled. "It's nice to meet you." She was curious about what Yuuma said about Kazuka being like him. Could it mean that he too was chosen by the mysterious goddess?

The stranger shook Yuuma's hand. "Right, nice to meet you all... I'm Kazuma. Kazuma Satou. And just like you I have been chosen by a goddess to defeat the Demon King." This was... going surprisingly well?

Once had Kazuma had spotted another guy that was clearly a cheating bastard, he had expected another Mitsurugi. A cocky, arrogant jerk that needed to learn a lesson. Instead Yuuma just seemed to be... normal?

Kazuma couldn't deny that he was strangely disappointed at that. Maybe because he secretly wished he could have picked a fight with him. He was obviously envious of such a cool goddamned cheat, even if he didn't understand all the mechanics of it.

Lucina's eyes widened. "So there are others!" She wondered if they were all as awful as Yuuma.

Celica looked away. "There are others, huh?" She just knew they were all as awful as Yuuma!

Lucina put a hand to her chin. "Still, do you know of the Fire Emblem because you can summon heroes just as Yuuma does?" That would explain a few things. Though not all. She still wanted to know what from Fire Emblem was supposed to mean.

Kazuma waved her off. "Nope, I can't summon anybody. My cheat is a bit... different. And let's just say I know about Fire Emblem... about the Fire Emblem, because of something else." He wouldn't be cruel enough to tell her about video games.

Yuuma sighed. "Can you tell me about this Fire Emblem though? I'm super lost here." Kazuma's eyes widened as Yuuma continued. "Seriously, you have just been assuming I know about it." Even Lucina seem to know about it!

Kazuma took a step back in shock. "You for real don't know!? C'mon man, it's like one of the most popular Nintendo franchises out there! Nowadays... it was admittedly pretty niche in the past."

Yuuma raised an eyebrow. "Nintendo huh?" He got what Kazuma was implying. Lucina and Celica were from a video game, supposedly. "Sorry to tell you Kazuma, but I haven't heard of Fire Emblem, so clearly it's pretty niche."

Also, Celica and Lucina didn't know one another. Did they just never meet in the game? Maybe they were from different sequels, or maybe the versions he summoned simply hadn't met yet? He supposed it didn't matter.

Actually, now that he thought about it, this whole thing was ridiculous. It was already insane odd that he summoned two normal women. There's no way he also summoned two normal women from the same world as well.

Kazuma's eye twitched. "Dude Fire Emblem shows up on Super Smash Bros." And even if he also didn't play that, he for sure knew about it! Right...?

Yuuma tilted his head. "Super Smash Bros...? You mean that shitty crossover game they made for the Wii U and then forgot about it?"

Suddenly Kazuma felt like he needed to kill this man. "What are you talking about!? It's like the most popular crossover fighter of all time!" And nowadays everyone wanted to copy it as well.

"No it's not." Yuuma supposed it had a small cult following. "The biggest crossover fighter of all time is obviously Playstation All-Stars Battle Royale." There wasn't even any game in the same tier of popularity as it!

"Fuck you." This Yuuma guy was fucking with him. That had to be it.

Celica interjected. "Now, now, let's keep the insults at a minimum." Both Kazuma and Yuuma thought she sounded like a frustrated mother right now. "I still don't get what this argument is about, but there is no need to swear."

Kazuma rolled his eyes. "Ugh, you're just as annoying as I thought you would be." Celica could only gasp. "This is why Gaiden Celica was better, they ruined you... Why don't you go make more deals with dark priests, huh?"

Celica flinched. "How do you know that!? A-and..." Well, she really had nothing to say back at that.

Now it was Yuuma's turn to interject. "Hey, she may be clearly inferior to Lucina, but ley off my fiancee!" Only he could abuse the women in his life!

"Hey!" Why were these two bullying her!?

"No comment." Lucina decided she wouldn't get involved in this fight between madmen.

However, Kazuma's rage immediately died out. Now he was the confused one. "Wait a minute, your fiancee?" That didn't seem like it was a joke. Did he miss something?

Yuuma nodded, though he was scowling. "Yeah, Celica and Lucina are my fiancees! So don't you dare talk trash about them!" If they were trash, then Yuuma would have obviously not asked for their hand in marriage.

Well, forced their hand in marriage. This was medieval times though! Arranged marriages happened all the time anyways!

Kazuma's face was filled with disbelief. "But..." He looked at the two women... they were blushing and looking away. "That's..."

His mind started racing.

At first he wanted to deny this whole thing. After all, if this was the real Celica then she should be utterly in love with Alm, they were arguably the most iconic pairing in the franchise after all. And surely Lucina had paired with someone as well, be it Robin or another second gen unit.

But he knew the truth. This bastard really had seduced them.

He had misread Yuuma Abe, thought of him to be of similar ilk to himself, thought of him to be unlike Mitsurugi, but no. He was a annoying, popular normie who didn't even know Fire Emblem... who barely knew fucking Super Smash Bros.

And yet he somehow had gotten engaged with two main heroines.

He needed to pay.

Kazuma poked at Yuuma's chest. "You and me are enemies now, got it?" Yes, Yuuma had failed the recruitment process. This red unit would stay a red unit. Or more accurately this green unit had become a red unit.

Kazuma didn't really like comparing himself to a green unit though. Even Aqua was smarter than those.

Yuuma tilted his head, still confused. "Okay...?" In the end he just had to accept that some people are incompatible, he supposed. "I guess you leave me no choice, but to pick this fight." He did insult his fiancees after all.

A grin appeared on his face. "I'm warning you though, I don't pick fights I can't win." He was a coward through and through! A nicer person might just call him cautious instead however.

Kazuma scowled. "Fuck. You. There's no way you don't know what Fire Emblem is." He just said the thing!

Lucina finally decided to interject. "Can we please end this already? We have things to do today Yuuma, we shouldn't waste time by fighting what is supposed to be our ally." She really wanted to check out those clothing stores.

Kazuma glared at her. "Hey, stay out of this miss four conversations is all it takes." Lucina didn't feel offended at the comment. Mostly because she had no idea what it was supposed to mean.

Kazuma redirected his glare back at his rival. "From now on I'm your Lyon got it? I'm gonna be your Berkut, your Julius, your... You get the idea. Don't expect to have a nice time while I'm around!" Okay, maybe he was being a bit too extreme.

Kazuma wasn't gonna like... burn his fiancee which he didn't have to obtain more power, or make a contract with a demon king, or be possessed by a evil book. Still, he might spread rumors about Yuuma around!

Yuuma raised an eyebrow. "I don't recognize any of these people."

Kazuma raised his fists. "That's it. We are throwing down right now." He wouldn't kill Yuuma or rough him up too bad, but sometimes popular bastards like him needed to be taught a lesson.

It was time for him to learn the pecking order of this world!

Yuuma did the natural thing in this situation. "Fiancees, guard me!" He took a step back.

He didn't know Kazuma's level or class. Which meant that for all he knew Kazuma could be a max level warrior. And even in the event of them being fairly equal, there was no reason to risk getting hurt.

Kazuma gasped at the sight. "Oi, that's my type of tactic. Please fight like a Lord."

"I'm a priest, so no." He would heal Lucina and Celica if they got wounded! He was contributing.

Celica was the first to step forward. "Right. Please apologize so nobody gets hurt." She wondered if stupidity was common amongst this goddess' champions. Clearly she had awful taste.

Lucina was the second. "Indeed." Her hand was already upon Falchion's hilt. Kazuma may have not indicated he would draw a weapon, but that didn't mean she would hold back.

She only did that when training with her dad, thank you very much! It was a Chrom privilege!

Kazuma clicked his tongue. "Don't think I'm afraid of two chicks, I'll have you know I have an ability that allows me to steal pant-!" Kazuma stopped himself. And then he started to truly think about the situation ahead of him.

Was he really about to fight two war veterans that had helped in slaying gods? Would either of them stop kicking his ass if their panties were stolen? He wasn't dealing with a Darkness here, these two were genuine heroines!

There was only one path available here. "Argh! I have been defeated, but I cannot fall here! I must make my retreat!" Kazuma ran away as fast as he could.

Celica scowled, and looked back at her supposed fiance. "So, can you explain his behavior?"

Yuuma awkwardly chuckled. "Not really. I think he's just... a peculiar individual."

"Right, because you aren't."

"I'm glad we both agree on that, Celica."



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"Wah...! What the hell...!" The guild girl could barely restrain her shouting as she looked at the card. "Another princess...!?" From where were they coming from!? Was there a princess bargain sale somewhere!?

Celica blushed. "Please keep quiet!" People were looking at her direction.

Yuuma raised an eyebrow. "Honestly, I'm with her here. What do you mean you're a princess? I thought you were a priestess?" Having two princesses on his party was kind of lame.

Wait, didn't this whole thing make his gacha pull even more insane?

Celica looked away. "Well, I was raised as a priestess, b-but yes, the truth is that I am a princess. Due to... complications, my identity had to be hidden." In the end Celica wasn't even her true name, even if she preferred it nowadays.

Lucina put a hand to her chin. "A princess with the fake name of Celica who lived hidden in an island while being raised as a princess...?" She was about to break her own mind.

Meanwhile, Yuuma could only glare at Celica. "We got engaged and you were still keeping things hidden from me? That's low. Real low." Should he asked for a divorce? Welp, they weren't married yet, so it wouldn't be a divorce.

Before Celica could rebuke him with the obvious, the guild girl raised a hand. "Wait a second, I thought Lucina was your fiancee? You know, the other princess you hang around with?" Ah. This small little place was filled with royalty.

And here she thought the craziest thing to ever happen here would be Darkness becoming an adventurer.

Yuuma waved her off. "They're both my fiancees. Polygamy and all that." Surely that was acceptable in fantasy land?

"You're engaged to two princesses!? How!?" Yeah, now everyone were definitely looking at his party.

Yuuma crossed his arms. "Well, in my defense I thought I was engaged to a priestess and a princess, so you tell me." He glared at his newest fiancee. "Actually, forget guild girl. You tell me Celica, if that's even your name?"

Guild girl tried interjecting. "Are you seriously calling me guild girl? My name is Luna." She went ignored.

Celica looked away. "Well..." Why did she feel genuinely bad about this? Yuuma was the worst. "It wasn't a big deal, my status as a princess doesn't matter anymore." Except it sort of did.

Once she married Alm they would unify Valentia after all, as the emperor of Rigel and the queen of Zofia. She felt that telling Yuuma about her huge marriage plans with her original lover wouldn't go well however.

Guild girl interjected again. "By the way, not throwing to throw more fire in this, but yes, she totally lying about her name." Yuuma immediately sent a incredulous look towards her.

Luna waved the card around. "It says right here that her name is Anthiese. Oh, and she technically commited a crime by telling me her name was Celica during registration. There's a fee for that." Okay, she was totally trying to throw fire into this.

Why is it that she remained single, and meanwhile there were some royal brats experiencing polygamy? They should all die.

Yuuma's eye twitched. "For real?" Now that this fee thing was brought up, he actually had a reason to be mad.

Celica sputtered. "Look, that may technically be my name, but I-." She never got to finish.

Mostly because a star struck Lucina was suddenly began holding onto her shoulder. "You... are Celica."

"Yes?"



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"No need to make such a grumpy face, Yuuma." Lucina was as confident as one could be as they walked. "We are sure to succeed with the legendary Celica by our side!" She still couldn't believe it...!

To think arguably the greatest legend of Valm was now her comrade...! Lucina was naturally extremely excited. She had been a girl raised on tales of legend after all.

The only thing that could make this better is if Yuuma had the luck to summon the Hero King next! Which was actually a possibility... his power clearly didn't care about time. As expected from a boon granted by a goddess.

Celica's smile was brittle. "I... don't know if I'm that great! But I'll try my best!" She didn't understand this time thing at all.

Apparently Lucina was from the far off future? As in, around two thousand years in the future? And somehow Celica was still remembered...? It sounded like rubbish to her.

But it was good to hear about how she and Alm had ruled justly and wisely. Now she just had to defeat this Demon King and come back to her actual fiance so that future came to pass. According to Lucina the future wasn't certain just because it had happened on her world.

Something about... alternate timelines? Well, she would need to ask for a better explanation later.

Yuuma sighed. "Your best better be good enough, or we are in deep shit." He was mad, but not about her lying about her identity and all that.

He was mad about the consequences of that.

Celica had commited a crime when she lied about her name during registration, and now Yuuma and his party owned cash to the government... So they had to take a dangerous quest.

The other reason he was mad was because of something kind of unrelated to the secret princess. He simply couldn't accept that for some reason his power decided to summon two people from the same world, but from different times.

He didn't even know that was possible! Why didn't the goddess tell him!?

Lucina gasped. "You can't talk like that to a legend, Yuuma!" At this point she had more or less forgotten that she had slept almost naked with that legend.

Celica blushed. "No, it's fine... I really messed up. So let's find this Rookie Killer so that I may truly apologize." Well, fighting something with that name did sound scary.

Which was probably why it paid so much. Thankfully Celica and Lucina were certainly not rookies.

Yuuma looked around. "We should stumble onto one eventually, we have been running around its territory." Or more accurately, the territory of other monsters.

The Rookie Killer was a interesting monster. It acted as a bodyguard for lesser monsters such as goblins, pouncing on newer adventurers who thought they were in for something nice and simple. Alternatively, if the adventurer was experienced, the Rookie Killer would let that adventurer tire himself by killing those goblins and then attack.

Naturally such a intelligent monster was not a species that could be allowed to thrive near the Town of Beginnings. So a quest to take one that had been sighted recently was paying super well.

Lucina nodded. "Indeed... Though it would be useful having a hunter right now. For all we know that beast is purposefully avoiding us." Lucina and Celica were technically low level, but any being with eyes could tell they were strong.

Yuuma scratched his chin. "That's true..." He left out a frustrated groan. "Honestly, at this point I just want that damn thing to pounce on me already. Can't it see that I'm a rookie!?" Then they could it kill it!

A black panther pounced on him.

"Ah! Help!" Several things happened at once.

Yuuma had no way of defending himself, the attack came from the back after all. Lucina and Celica were quick however, extremely quick. As soon as the attack happened, both moves to defend their summoner.

The Rookie Killer was hit with both a fireball, and with a slash from a woman who could split stone in half. Naturally it died.

However, Yuuma was still freaking out, and so he metaphorically used everything he had.

His party had technically defeated a fellow reincarnatior. His party grew in size with the addition of another princess. His party just defeated the infamous Rookie Killer. Due to all these factors... that bar was filled.

With a bright flash... she was summoned.

There was no way to describe her with any word, but fantastical. Something about her just made her seem... magical. And the book she was carrying... the tome... made both Celica and Lucina shiver.

It emanated incredible power, enough power to make both Celica and Lucina go deadly silent. They instinctively knew that if a fight started... they would lose.

"Um... where am I?"

Yuuma slowly sat up. "Ah. I summoned you to another world by accident. My bad." He summoned another hot chick!? This power had to be rigged!

"Eh...?"



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AN: New waifu. For those who are lost because her name hasn't been clarified yet, it's Julia. Ah... I'm sure she has no complicated history with stuff like this. Not at all.

Deirdre moment.

Julia should be the last waifu summoned for a decent while, so I can give the team some time to breathe. Next time it might be the legendary man...

There was actually a version of this chapter where Sigurd was summoned.