Midnight Pals: what's the deal in the UK (Patreon)

Rowling: hello children
Rowling: I have good newssss
Rowling: sscotland thought it could get away with being lessss transssphobic
Rowling: well!
Rowling: not on my watch!

Rowling: I’m delighted to ssssay that wessstminsssster issss going to put those filthy ssscotsss their place
Rowling: imagine! Getting all uppity like that!
Rowling: we’ll sssoon put them back in their place!
Rowling: and that place is
Rowling: under the heel of the king

Stephen King: but joanne
King: what if
King: what if Scotland doesn’t like that
King: you just gonna
Barker: break up the UK over this?
Rowling: I would dessstroy 100 UKs if it meant the oppressssion of just ONE transss perssson!

King: I don’t really understand what’s going on
King: so you’re saying that Scotland decided to be less transphobic and England just
King: told them they can’t?
Rowling: yessss
Rowling: you make it ssssound like it’sss ssssomething bad, sssteve
Rowling: it’ssss actually very very good

King: I still don’t get it
Rowling: you wouldn’t!
Rowling: you americanssss! Alwayssss sssso obsssesssed with your ssssilly ideasss of
Rowling: repressssentational government
Rowling: here in England, the king tellssss ussss what to think and we like it!

King: It just seems to me that, you know, the people of Scotland have spoken on this?
King: and it seems really
Rowling: don’t worry ssssteve
Rowling: you’re going to get usssed to the idea of minoritarian rule real fasssst
King:
Rowling: we’ve got alliessss acrossssss the pond even now

King: I still don’t get it
Rowling: sss you wouldn’t sssteve
Rowling: I wouldn’t expect an American to underssstand the sssubtle beauty of British governance
[at the English parliament]
Large number of inbred gentry: [clacking Habsburg chins in dismay]

[at the English parliament]
Lord Thistlewit Splodge, MP for North Wankingshire: I say I say I say!!! Scotland thinks it can self-determine?  Egad!
Lord Winston Hefferbottom, MP for West Hemmingwedge: Motion to fuck around!
Lord Skeffington Hooblebooble, MP for East Hinkleswitch: Second!
Lord Nigel Dinglehopper, MP for South Slurrysham: [hurumphing through dundrearies]

Rowling: look at what the transsss made ussss do
Rowling: with their ssssilly demandssss not to be killed!
Rowling: they made ussss break up the UK!
Rowling: if they loved your country you’d jussst conveniently disssappear

King: edward, you’re British
King: explain what’s going on
Edward Gorey: I say, old bean, I’m not British
King:
Gorey:
King:
Gorey:
Gorey: we’ve been over this before