Chapter 21 (Patreon)

I’m gonna be honest. Today is probably the most I’ve been excited for ever since I was dropped in here like a sack of potatoes left to rot after being humped by an old hobo that had a talking shopping cart as his inventory system. Don’t read too much into that.

We step into the shop and an old guy greeted us with a smile on his face. He didn’t say a word, but a wave was enough communication for a socially anxious Ruby, who waved back with a chipper grin.

“So, Jack. What you gonna do?” Ruby asked as she browsed through the catalogue that housed different types of magazines all uni-themed: guns. More specifically, mechashift weapons.

“I dunno. Browse a bit of the comics on display. Maybe the adults only section of the shop?” I wiggled my eyebrows and the teen girl mock-retched.

“Blegh, gross!” She turned around zoomed into another corner of the shop holding, you guessed it, more magazines on guns. I swear, this girl is a gunphilia. It won’t be long before she starts humping her weapons cuz she can’t get a date when she grows older.

God, I didn’t need that in my mind. Go away, intrusive thoughts! Go away! I don’t need you here!

Palming my face, I take the magazine that she left open and flipped through it quickly. Not gonna lie, the hardware some companies advertising through these pieces of paper made my man brain go unga bunga. Maybe Ruby was onto something…

Slotting it back in place, I spot the sun slowly going down, the light shining from the giant ball of gas blocked by the concrete buildings, creating a sort of afterglow along the edges. Looked nice, honestly. Kind of something like a portrait one would see hung in a museum.

Seeing that Ruby was still a bit distracted by the magazines with her headphones now blasting tasteless music in her ears - I swear, I’ll bring her into listening contemporary classical one of these days. FromSoftware, where’s your godlike Gehrman theme when I need it - I decided to browse the other section of the place, that being the Dust shop.

Dust wasn’t really expanded in the show. It was just there, serving as methods of energy and/or propellant for bullets. One thing that took a bit of my curiosity, however, was the fact that aura - a person’s soul made manifest with the physical world - can interact with said thing to create mind-boggling effects… Maybe…

If it’s true, then it meant that Dust isn’t just a source of energy. No, it’s much more than that. Judging by the history of this entire rock floating in space, magic was real… No, it is real. The maidens and Ozpin prove this. Hell, there was even Salem brooding in that dark castle of hers that could use magic.

So, does that mean that Dust is crystallized magic? If so, are they mana orbs?

Since there’s no name I could pin on the thing, I’ll just refer to them as mana orbs. Since they can interact with aura, do Dust contain mana that could reinvigorate a person’s capability to do magic?

It was a long shot, but an experiment worth looking into. With Cinder already having half of the Fall Maiden’s powers, being able to give magic to those capable would do wonders in countering the bitch.

[Quest Received]

[Where’s my Goddamn Magical Fantasy World!?]

[Objective: Uncover the secrets of Dust]

[Bonus Objective: Do it before the start of the Vytal Festival]

[Rewards: 1 Epic Perk Roll, 1 Epic Item Roll, 25 stat points]

[Bonus Rewards: 1 Legendary Perk Roll, 1 Legendary Item roll, 50 stat points]

Oh? Ohohohohohoho??? Well, if I wasn’t motivated enough yet, now I am. In the wise words of Daddy Vergil, “Now I’m Motivated!”

A grin overtook my face as I stared directly into the holographic window, but then it dropped. It dawned on me that I had no fucking clue how to start. That, and I’m so goddamn broke, it’s a wonder I ain’t homeless yet…

Holy shit, did the system give me another impossible quest? Damn you ROB! And here I thought I had a luck perk! Fucking hell…

Okay, it’s not too bad. I can ask Ozpin what the hell Dust is, since he’s fucking ancient. The only thing I need to do is convince him to let me know. We have mutual interests, he wants Salem gone, and I also want her gone. If he knows what's good for the entirety of Remnant, he’ll let me know.

“Ahem…” A fake cough caught my attention, causing my head to twist in the direction of the source. The sold man’s frown made me shiver as he glared at me with his closed eyes. As for how he does that, I have no fucking idea, but it’s fucking scaring me!

How the hell did Torchwick not shit his pants when he came face to face with this guy? Oh right, Cinder is holding his leash. Goddamn femme fatale. I wonder how her head would look impaled on a pike?

Blegh, that was just so wrong on many levels…

“Ahem!” The cough caught my attention again, and this time the shopkeep was literally face to face with me. “Are you buying?”

“… Just waiting for my friend. Ruby, if you know her.” I pointed towards the section of the shop where the girl was busy browsing through the catalogs as she hummed with the tune playing in her headphones.

The old man grumbled for a while, but he ceased his prodding and went back to manning the front desk. Breathing a sigh of relief, mentally that is, I headed to where Ruby was with a slow stride. No point in rushing this because all I needed to do was wait for Roman to make his move.

And then, inspiration. A nasty grin overtook my face as I slowly snuck up behind the short teen who was still reading through the magazine. The pictures on it gave me pause for a second. How the hell was a rotating pole connected to a cylinder with various gears supposed help maintain the structure of a mechashift weapon? That just seemed like a disaster waiting to happen.

Anyway, not my problem. I just want a simple weapon that can shift from range to melee without much of a fuss, unlike Ruby’s monster of an anti-material sniper-scythe.

Creeping up behind the girl, I hold my hands beside her sides, and as the girl lay distracted, I pounced. My fingers came crashing upon her ticklish flanks. The girl stiffened, her hunched posture going ramrod straight as she let out a wordless scream.

The magazine she held in her hands dropped to the floor as the tickling came to an end. I cackled madly behind her, and the girl turned to glare at me with teary eyes.

“Jake! You meanie!” I cackled some more.

“Revenge for last week.” I winked and the girl pouted. “Can’t handle my magic fingers? Then don’t mess with them in the first place.”

“Alright! Alright! Jeez.” Ruby pouted some more before she grabbed the magazine that flopped to the ground. “I will remember this. You will rue the day you messed with me.”

“Oh, talking like big girls now, are we?” The teen blushed as her mouth struggled to form a word. “Word of advice, practice socializing first before trying out complicated words in the dictionary.”

“… I hate you…” Ruby pouted some more, and I couldn’t help but chuckle out loud. God was it funny teasing the poor girl. She was just too adorable! And no, FBI, I ain’t a pedo. She’s technically an adult. I’ve read the laws. Old to wield giant weapons that could kill or maim a person, old enough to be considered an adult.

Still a bit confused as to why the drinking age remained the same, but not like it could stop a person if they wanted to get drunk. Pretty sure there were smuggling rings in Beacon that brought in contraband, a.k.a. liquor where Huntsmen and Huntresses in training good get smashed after a grueling day of hard work.

And if some freaky stuff happened under the sheets during the time? That’s on them if they multiplied nine months later. Not that it was that much of a problem. Apparently, it was accepted. Encouraged, even. Declining birth-rates and all.

Great, now I’m remembering that humanity in this world is actually facing an extinction level threat. Fuck my life…

It was at this moment that I heard some commotion coming from the front desk. The sun had already sunk beneath horizon, giving way for the broken moon to illuminate the night.

My eyes grew wide.

“Jack? What’s wron- Mpf!?” I clammed a hand over her mouth and stuck close to the wall. The girl tried to struggle for a bit, but after a moment, she stopped. I don’t know why, but I’m not going to look a gift horse in the mouth, because right at the front desk, I saw an all too familiar person with orange hair and a bowler hat, followed by a dozen goons dressed in smart suits.

Roman Torchwick is here, and my heart was beating faster than ever before. No, this wasn’t because of fear, nor anxiousness. One look at my face was enough to show that I wasn’t afraid.

A huge grin threatened to split my lips as I continued looking at THE Roman Torchwick, one of my favorite characters in the entire show. Probably the only grounded in reality man of the show.

And now I get to fight him. Well, me and Ruby, but the idea was there.

I locked eyes with Ruby, and she was giving me deadpan, as if to say ‘really?’ What can I do? Yang was a bad influence on me. I also blame my heritage.

“You brought Crescent Rose?” Ruby nodded as she patted the red box-looking thing strapped over her waist. “Good, now then. We are going to help Mr. Shopkeeper here, after all, you wouldn’t want the store closing because of bad business.”

Her eyes went wide, then was replaced with a determined glare. Of course she wouldn’t want the store to close. It housed most of her favorite gun magazines, the selfish brat. But hey, it hits two birds with one stone. She gets to act like a hero and save her magazines.

I looked at my hands. With how much I sparred with Yang, my fists were as deadly as a real blade. Throw in my reinforcement as well as my natural(lol) durability, and I was pretty sure my punched would knock someone’s lights out for the next week.

I frowned… Did I learn how to hold back…? I didn’t, did I? Ah shit… Hopefully they have their Aura’s unlocked, otherwise… Yeah, let’s not think about it.

I turned around and saw the barrel of the gun pointing directly at my face. Looking at the wielder, I saw a goon looking at me with an annoyed expression.

“Hands in the air!” If I was a lesser man, my knees would’ve wobbled, and I would’ve fallen straight on my ass. I am not most men.

“UNGA BUNGA!” The yell caught the goon off guard and shocked him long enough for my hand to grip around the pistol he was holding. I applied force and the plastic fell underneath my grip.

The goon looked at the gun in his hands, or the remnants of it, and looked at me with a neutral expression. He raised his arms to his side, but my yell notified the others in the front desk.

Welp, I wasn’t really a sneaky kind of person. Why else would I go for the tank/juggernaut build?

Giving the goon a grin, I clenched my fist and gave the man a solid punch in the gut. His Aura - thank god he had one - flashed and broke, before he was tossed into another goon. The two sailed across the air and impacted the glass windows of the store, shattering them into tiny little pieces.

I winced. Here I thought I would be able to avoid that from happening like what happened in canon, but I guess the window was always meant to be broken. Sorry, shopkeeper, your window will be missed.

Also, Ruby apparently rushed after them like a kid high on a sugar rush… God fucking damnit…