Heart Healing with Diamond & Rose Quartz (Patreon)

I think the healing is working because while proofreading it forced me to look at my resistance and everything I hate about myself. Putting all that aside, however overpowering my distaste for my "experimental" makeup and "never big enough even when curly" hair, I can honestly say I did not half-ass this video. 

About my efforts to induce the most tingles:

I've already told you about creating the aesthetic and I went all out trying to match the rose quartz theme with overwhelming amounts of green and pink, both colors associated with the heart. I was gonna stick with all green for a uniform theme, but when I set up the trigger close up shot of playing with rose quartz, I wasn't happy with how the green lighting just drowned out the natural color of the rose quartz, defying the purpose of showing it up close in the first place - so I switched to the least obnoxious shade of pink I could contemplate.

Why the triggers tho? In all honesty, I filmed the shots with me in it last Friday night, thinking that would be the end of it. That's what my videos have been about, right? Saturday afternoon, though, during editing, I found that I got sick of looking at my own face and listening to my own stupid jokes that weren't funny. I mean, some were funny and I left them in, but others had me at "please stop you're not as funny as you're trying to be" - what can I say, I, too, am just an awkward Sagittarius ascendant. So I had to do something about that. I found the basic video a bit boring and while that may be a good thing in terms of putting people to sleep, it started to get painful. For me. To edit. The most fun part was getting creative in covering up my annoying-ness with triggers I don't use very frequently. I thought it would be cool to add some close up triggers related to what I'm talking about, so after cutting together the skeleton all of Saturday and Sunday afternoon, Sunday night was spent trying to record some book tapping ASMR, hand movements, clonking sounds of the crystals... I just kept going until I felt I had enough sounds to fill the parts I decided I was gonna cut out and reread with the super close up tingly voiceover, admittedly, until I was ready to pass out flat. A drawback of having a flipped sleep schedule is that my circadian rhythm is still working and every night at 4AM sharp my body gives itself a hit of cortisol, leaving me with scheduled anxiety attacks and eventually muscle fatigue as, well, I should be sleeping. ... Back to hands. Someone once asked me to make a hand relaxation video and I haven't done one yet. From what I understand, hand movements are supposed to be soothing - can anyone here confirm this? In all of my ASMR history I haven't found much appeal in looking at someone's hands for an extended period of time. But many people seem to enjoy it, so I thought I'd give it a try. More potent, for me, are the brushing and tapping sounds my hands are actually making. But I achieved my goal of making a less boring video, fading in and out between the regular reading and close up triggers. Do you like it or is it distracting? I know my brain functions a little differently and I'm very, very easily bored as my attention span is just not the longest. So I may be doing you a disservice by tailoring my videos to fit my ideal tingle experience. You let me know. 

I also don't have a lot of foresight as I just started highlighting the bits I had to rerecord, not realizing the book was going to be in the shot. I would have just skipped that if I had more diamonds to ASMR on, but, alas... I'm a fucking peasant and can't afford 25 carat diamonds for tapping XD I hope having the tiny one to heal your heart will do.

About the healing...

As always, nothing in this video was scripted. I just went by feeling and, I don't know how to explain this, something happens whenever I make videos like that. I'm the one just following how the energy unfolds as if I were healing an actual person, despite holding the rocks up to a camera and only creating the illusion. It still works and my best guess is that I'm subconsciously projecting the idea of what a viewer of mine would need in any moment and this is what the stone responds to. If you have a theory, I'd love to hear it. 

I hope this proves useful to you and I would love some feedback of what you felt during the healing. The concept still mystifies me. How can a generic video induce very real healing experiences in certain people? And why do I feel what I feel when I'm standing in front of the camera? You know, life's big mysteries. But as long as it makes a positive difference in you, I'm happy. I was very impressed with the effects of the amulet. I wore it all of Friday to acquaint myself with its energy as part of the preparation for the video. That is because I'm not familiar with the soft and peaceful vibration of the rose quartz so I can't just put it on and jump into it - I go through a phase of burrowing through resistance for a while and trying to film during that phase seems counterproductive. Eventually, the vibration of the crystal prevails and draws out the hidden softness in me that I try to tuck away and want no part of usually. But I can't do that and pull you towards healing softness at the same time so fuck it if I hate who I am and how I look when I'm like this, that's a me thing - not a you thing. This video serves a purpose and I believe it's doing that, though I let you be the judge of my creative abilities. 

Please don't tell me that I look good, though, and don't make comments about the color of my lips. I hate it and nothing you say can convince me not to. That's a me thing - not a you thing. 

I hope you enjoy the video anyway. Outtakes and new poll coming soon!