Inktober - The Hermit (Patreon)

a.k.a "Cursed card" to me. Damn i was so stoked for the idea of breaking the framing this time and showing this being in a full body shot. Soo many things went wrong during creation of this card. Dear lords. I never thought it was possible to make so many technical mistakes.

It started pretty normal. I did some brainstorming, sketched out some thumbnails, played around with the ideas behind Hermit's meanings. 

I knew i wanted to keep original symbols of lantern and staff, but i wanted to show his wisdom in a different way than by him being old. So from a get go I decided to stick to the idea of meditation and hands crossed in a somewhat twisted lotus position (even though that would feel so wrong later on)

On a sketch everything seemed fine. But after putting it in ink and final framing i just... couldn't really be happy with that card. I couldn't figure out what spaces should be black,  what should stay white and where to put gold. I was reapplying ink, tried to cover it with golden paint over and over again, until i completely fucked it up... And without thinking much i torn The Hermit to shreds (unfortunately i was so frustrated with the card that i completely forgot to take the photo of it before it found its new home in a fireplace).

I took few deep breaths and started from the scratch, this time letting my mind flow out of the tight frames i gave it with previous designs. 

"I'll make him full body. Screw the format. It feels way too cramped when his arms are crossed. I don't see him having the knowledge of the universe he acquired through years of solitude. I can't see him being the light to the world. I need to make his posture open, and wise. I need to show space around him. Show where he sits and how he sits."

With that i redesigned him, cut out new card, layed out margins and all important points... Without realising that one of the margin lines was missing... 

This caused me to draw the entire image with a different framing and in the end different composition. After all that struggle to draw this card all over again i hit this wall thinking "Fuck, this card is cursed". Ofc it wasn't, it was just me having pretty hectic few days but still.... i was forced to redo this card AGAIN... or get a bit crafty. 

You can imagine (having this curse in mind) how did it go.
Without thinking logically i cut out the inner drawing of the fucked up card, planned to cut out a hole in a blank card and match the hole to the cut out. Why didn't i just cut one card? Why didn't i just cut a hole in a blank one and put it over the fucked up card to frame it differently and therefore margin it right? Idonno. I was stupid.

I ended up having to stitch the fucked up card back together and then frame it within a blank card with good margins. That worked, but now i had not so cute horisontal cutline at the top of the drawing and a lot of paper tape on the back to hold this damn contraption together. 

But in the end, even though it has a passe-partout look, i managed to finish this damn, cursed by my tired brain, card.
Here I am, living the meaning of this card myself. I acquired the knowledge of how not to make a card by my lonely journey of making one and I'm here to tell you how fucking frustrating it is and it may be for you in the future if you decide not to give up. 

Don't give up. And in the end, if you'll end up with a wonky child like this one, just sigh, and say "You've been through a lot, you're good enough, and you taught me to look out for all the mistakes that i did this time. You - a damn piece of paper with scribbles on it, are a good teacher. And I'm glad that i didn't give up on you."