"Against the Kitchen Floor" Lyrics (Patreon)

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I don’t owe you my heart, and I don’t owe you my body.

But you should know that I’m sorry for being careless with you.

Lord knows I owed you more, than I’m pretty sure I ever could give anybody

But I can’t pin down what normal people want from foreign objects, bottom shelf erotic products like me

So, I could hold your hand but keep you at arms’ length

Oh, hang me from a branch too high to climb and shake

Less rare than scarce, less diamond than rough

Unlikely to be more than the coal you fail to crush

I… swear I’m really trying.

Get it together, Will, know and do better

It just don’t come natural to me to think

That you’d want me for me

I swear I’m really trying

I’m sorry, I promise, I’m doing my best

I just haven’t learned how to be human as you are yet

I still don’t know who you are. I only know that I’m still lonely

That morbid sort where even company can’t cure me, and the more you reassure the less I trust

But still you gave me your heart, I only gave you my body.

Honestly thought nobody’d want it, let alone notice it’s gone and so I left it home but

Now, now, now, now

I keep a locket with a picture of the back of my head,

Oh, monkey-wrench my side view mirrors, ghost my friends

I’ve lived more lives than enough, I haven’t died quite as much,

But I’m not a real person, just the shit you can’t make up

I swear I’m really trying.

I’m just as exposed if I take off my clothes when we make the closest thing to love that I’m capable of

I don’t know why you would care. But I’m really trying

I’m sorry, I promise, I’m doing my best

I just haven’t learned how to be human as you are yet

Did I really

Have any of that gravity? Maybe you’re quicksand

Because I really couldn’t tell how deep my footprints went

The vertex of my redemption arc, the searching of that virgin heart

I’m catatonic in your arms,

Cryin’ “how did I cause so much harm?”

I’m down pounding my head against the kitchen floor

Apologizing for my life and ever entering yours

Don’t say “I’m sorry but this can’t go on” I know you got scars of your own,

But hide my knives before you go, I’ll either live or die alone

I swear I will die trying

I’m still in the process but I’m making progress.

I promise I honestly want to prove improvement’s possible

I swear I’m so fucking sorry

I’m not a good person, I’m barely a person at all, but someday I’ll be perfect and I’ll make up for it all

And write a fucking song about it ‘cause it has to be all about Will’s fucking drama, god damn it! Sorry. Fuck, I’m sorry.