Would You Rather... (Patreon)

“What the fuck kinda question is that?”  Hank turned to look at his friend, head cocked and eyebrow raised.  He would have scooted a bit further away if they weren’t already seated at opposite ends of the couch, but, as it was, he had to content himself with a single empty cushion between them.

The sculpted statue of a man at the far end shrugged, a bashful grin offsetting his comically wide jaw.  “What?  You don’t think about shit like that?”

“No!  Turns out I don’t,” Hank laughed, shaking his head.  Despite his outward surprise, the whipcord brunette had actually long since gotten used to his brawny friend’s odd tangents and unconventional lines of thought.  The chiseled, raven-haired hunk was always coming out of nowhere with entirely random questions and opaque philosophical insights that came to him while lifting.  It was one of the things Hank loved most about his friend, but every now and then the strapping meathead managed to catch him off guard.

Brian shrugged again.  “Okay…but which would you choose?”

“Oh my god,” Hank laughed, his head falling back on the couch.  “What exactly were you doing when this question occurred to you?”

“Jerkin’ off,” Brian said with a proud grin.  He reached down and squeezed his bulge through the front of his loose basketball shorts, his piston arm flexing in the process.  Like their positions on the sofa, the two friends sat at opposing ends of the physical spectrum.  While Brian’s hulking, precision-crafted bulk spilled out of a draping muscle shirt and sat like an anchor, Hank’s lean, toned frame appeared weightless by comparison within the confines of his fitted joggers and small, tight t-shirt.  Brian was olive-hued and tapering, with an exaggeratedly charming boy-next-door face compared to Hank’s pale complexion, ruddy brown hair, and sharp features.

“Not surprising,” the thinner man grinned, looking down at the front of his pants.  There was another key difference between them, and while Brian’s ample muscle had earned him the nickname “Buff Brian,” the wiry brunette was known as “Hung Hank.”  The dark-haired meathead’s average equipment wasn’t subpar, but it didn’t come close to his toned friend’s excessive endowment.  “I don’t know, man…neither?”

“Not an option, bro,” Brian insisted.  “You’ve gotta pick one or the other: a super tiny package, or a pussy.”

Hank knew his friend wasn’t going to let it drop, and that resisting would only egg the grinning jock on.  “Okay, like, how tiny,” he relented.

“Something like this.”  Brian held up a stubby thumb and forefinger, just over an inch apart.  “So small you could piss out of it but not much else.  Little baby balls, too.  Like, you could probably still jerk it yourself, but fucking someone with it would be out of the question.”

Hank sighed.  “And my only other option’s a pussy?”

“Yup.  It’d work and everything like it should…it’d just be full-on lady parts down here,” Brian said, pumping his meaty legs back and forth.

Hank absently scratched at a toned, steely bicep as he thought about it.  “I guess I’d go for the little guy.”

Brian looked legitimately surprised.  “Huh.  Really?”

“Yeah, why wouldn’t I?  Wait…you mean you’d actually go for a pussy,” Hank asked with a laugh, looking equally shocked.

“Dude, hear me out,” the brawny bodybuilder said, holding up a hand to head off the interruption he knew was coming.   “At least with a pussy you could still get with someone, you know?  Not saying it wouldn’t be weird, just that you’d have more options that way.”

“More dick options,” Hank exclaimed, shaking his head.  “You’d have no choice but to get stuffed!”

“So?  Doesn’t seem like it’s all that bad when I’m the one doing the stuffing.”  Brian reached down and squeezed his bulge again, his bashful grin returning.  “Plus, I’m reeaaal good with these fingers.”

“Listen, man…I know you have a…different…relationship with the male body than I do.  You’re around a bunch of naked sweaty dudes all the time at the gym.  But I don’t know if I’m ready to commit to the D so fast.”  Hank couldn’t hold back a smug smile of his own as he watched his friend squeeze.  “Also this feels like an unfair question since you’re already familiar with half of the options.”

“Fuuuuuuuuck you,” Brian laughed, “AND your donkey dick, too.”

“No, see, I’D be the one doing the fucking,” Hank said, scooting closer to his friend.  “You’d be on the receiving end.”

“Not from you!  Not with that little nub.  You’d have to put that bony ass of yours to work unless you just planned on tweaking it yourself all the time,” Brian sneered, holding up his thumb and a pair of fingers as he rubbed them together.

“This feel like a nub?”  Hank threw himself over so that he straddled his friend’s lap and began rolling his hips, grinding his oversized hose against Brian’s muscled midsection.  After years of sharing a living space as well as various locker rooms, it was the kind of easy horseplay they routinely engaged in with each other and their two roommates.  They were all well-versed in the others’ bodies, being almost as familiar with them as their own, but, while there’d never been anything remotely arousing about their antics in the past, Hank felt a sudden tingling break out between his toned thighs.  He went to pull away, only to find a pair of meaty hands clamped to his firm, perky little bubble.

“Ohhhhh, yeah, give it to me,” Brian mock-moaned, pursing his plump lips.  “Now there’s a question…if I actually did have a pussy, would you hit it?”

“What?!  Okay…now this is just getting weird,” Hank stammered.

Brian raised an eyebrow, not letting his friend go.  “Kinda feels like you’d hit it,” he grinned, noticing the other man’s erect state before Hank did.  He started to make a joke but stopped, the odd discrepancy finally sinking in.  Instead of looking at the rigid outline of a ten-inch pole in the brunette’s joggers, he found himself faced with a much more modest tent.  “Uh…is that…is that supposed to be like that?”

A flushed-faced Hank looked down, his eyes going wide.  He was confusingly, achingly hard, but the lump that pointed directly towards his friend shouldn’t have been possible at his size.  “N…no…I don’t…I don’t think sooOOOOHHHH!”  The wiry hunk yelped when Brian abruptly grabbed the waist of his pants and boxers, tugging both down.  Instead of a thick, imposing log, a modest cock half the size it should have been sprung free.  “WHAT THE FUCK?!  What happened to my dick,” he cried, his stomach dropping as the reduced organ continued to dwindle.  “No…no no no no no…” he moaned, the shrinking member sliding below four inches by the time he grabbed for it.  Hank’s head spun as he felt his once-pendulous balls recede, the rigid little poker continuing to whither against his palm.  He stumbled off Brian’s lap, landing in a heap on the floor when his legs caught in the pants around his knees.  “Is that…that can’t really be my…” he sputtered, gawking at the little nub where his hefty equipment should have been.  The absence was palpable, and Hank winced at the lack of contact when he should have been feeling his lengthy hose flopped up against his stomach or draped over a thigh.  “Did you do this?!” he roared, kicking out of his discarded bottoms so he could climb to his feet.  “We were JUST talking about this, and all of a sudden my shit shrinks?”

“What?!  No!  Of course not!  I’d never…how would I even do that in the first place,” Brian stammered.  “I’m just as surprised as…you…oh…oh no…” he broke off in a gasp, his eyes going wide and his face pale when he reached for his bulge again.  “Fuck!  Fuck!”  The chiseled meathead sprang to his feet, tearing his shorts and boxer-briefs down to reveal the flat mound and new orifice where his own package should have been.  “Is that a fucking pussy?!”

Hank didn’t know what to say.  He’d already been feeling a confusing swell of lust, and he was just as captivated as he was surprised by his friend’s alterations.  The bottom of the stunned bodybuilder’s muscle shirt stopped just above his trimmed bush, drawing even more attention to the out-of-place opening between his powerful thighs.  The situation should have been horrifying, and on a purely logical level it was, but it didn’t feel that way.  Staring back and forth between his petite poker and his friend’s gaping gash, Hank practically quaked with desire.  He couldn’t actually tell if his shortened cock was hard or if his thick little nub always felt that way, but it was taking all of his control not to throw himself at his friend.  “Okay…okay…let’s take a breath,” he finally said.  “Are we just going crazy?  It can’t be a coincidence that this happened right while we were talking about it.”

“But how did it happen at all?!”  Brian’s massive hand hovered just above his altered lower half, a hesitant expression on his face.

“How the fuck should I know,” Hank spat, giving in and finally pinching his tiny member between a pair of fingers.  He gasped at how sensitive it was, his stomach dropping when he thought about how it used to spill out of a closed fist.  “Did either of us piss off a witch or something?  You’re the one who’s always bringing the weird ones home.”

“Bro!  Why do you keep trying to blame this one on me,” Brian cried, thrusting his hips forward and pointing at his abdomen.  “I’m not exactly unscathed over here.  When I said I’d rather have a pussy I didn’t mean I actually wanted one.”

Hank sighed and shook his head.  “I know, I know. I’m sorry…I’m just freaking out.  What does it, uh, feel like?”

“Weird,” the meaty jock said, squirming in place.  “It feels like I should be hard right now, but there’s nothing there.”  His stubby fingers finally made tentative contact, sending a shiver through his brawny frame when the tips brushed against his sensitive new lips.

“Yeah…about that…” Hank stammered, his face going red again.  “Why am I so hot right now?  No offense man, but you shouldn’t be turning me on so much.”

“Why ARE you so hot right now,” Brian said, looking embarrassed when he realized how quickly and emphatically he’d said it.  “I mean, not that I…you’re not…I just…” he trailed off, defeated.  “Fuck it, dude.  I don’t know why, but I want you so bad right now I can’t stand it.”

“We…we were talking about that, too.  Remember?  I was talking about how you’d be into dick, and you were talking about how I’d have to use my ass to…to…” Hank’s eyes went wide when he realized he’d begun tweaking his aching stump at the thought of Brian’s probing fingers rooting around inside his painfully empty hole.  If anything, he’d expected to fantasize about plowing into his friend, but even though the dark-haired hunk lacked the equipment, all Hank could think about was getting penetrated by the strapping stud.

“Oh shit,” Brian gasped.  “At least that explains why I want to…” he stopped himself this time, but just barely.

“Why you want to…what?” Hank asked, his stomach fluttering.  There was a moment of silence as Brian opened and closed his mouth several times before finally lunging forward and dropping to his knees.  His hands resumed their earlier position on Hank’s firm little bubble, but, unlike the previous encounter, this time the flustered meathead swallowed the entirety of his friend’s diminished equipment.  “OOOUUuuUUOOOoHHH!”  Hank arched his back and howled, a lightning bolt of bliss shooting through him as the kneeling jock worked everything at once.  The handsome brunette had received more blowjobs than he could remember over the years, but none of them had felt even remotely close to the ecstasy coursing up and down his spine.  At his previous size it was only possible to work parts of his girthy monster at a time, but now his oozing head, sensitive shaft and churning balls all sat comfortably within the confines of Brian’s warm, moist mouth.  That also left his friend’s hands free to begin pushing against and probing his ravenous button, the combined sensations making his head spin.  He grabbed Brian’s muscle shirt and pulled it up to the other man’s broad shoulders, his toned pecs heaving when the kneeling beefcake stopped long enough to let it be pulled free. “Oh fuck…oh fuuuuck,” Hank moaned, tossing the shirt aside.  “You’re…this feels incredible…”

Brian just laughed, pushing his swallowed digit deeper into his friend’s hole.  “Feels like you’re gonna break my finger back there.  I…”

“Are you two starting without us?”  Both of the altered men froze at the familiar sound of Brad’s voice, quickly joined by Eric’s.

“You know how they get, dude.  Keep ‘em waiting too long and it’s bound to happen.”  Hank and Brian exchanged a quick, panicked glance before looking over at their two roommates sauntering in.  The fit pair undressed as they walked, stripping down to their underwear by the time they crossed the threshold.

“Oh!  Uh…we just…I mean we were…” Hank stammered, biting back a groan at the sight of his friends.  He knew he should have been mortified at being caught with his shrunken cock in Brian’s mouth while the other man’s finger was two knuckles deep inside him, but all he could think about was how attractive his friends were.  Brad’s blonde, buff frame rode the line between his own lean build and Brian’s oversized muscle, filling the gap with a tapering, athletic frame.  He was the classic jock, a disarming pretty-boy with sparkling eyes and a plump, ample package filling out his straining briefs.  The twitching rod wasn’t as big as Hank’s had been, but the sudden rush of memories of every time he’d seen the perfectly proportional pole hit the addled brunette like a punch in the gut.  The same went for Eric’s brawny, freckled bulk, already on full display as the stocky ginger stepped out of his boxers.  He was nearly as wide as he was tall, his unsculpted boulder of a body covered by a sparse dusting of ruddy hair that emphasized his beefy nature.  He had a fat, wide cock that was just as short and thick as the rest of him, and which filled Hank with the same familiar longing.

“Just gettin’ each other warmed up,” Brad purred, stepping close and wrapping his arms around Hank from behind.  He slid his hands up beneath the blushing brunette’s t-shirt, groping the lean man’s defined, modest muscle while grinding his twitching briefs into Hank’s perky cheeks.  “How’s the little guy doing today?”

The thin man gasped when one of those hands dropped and swallowed his diminutive equipment.  He instinctively bucked his hips against it, causing his firm bubble to simultaneously work the front of Brad’s shorts.  “Bet…better now,” he stammered, unsure where the words had come from.  He knew none of it made sense, that his friends should have been equally panicked by their altered bodies and altered behavior, but the scene was playing out as if it happened all the time.  In front of him, Hank watched as Brian casually shifted over on his knees, swallowing Eric’s pudgy cock without the slightest hesitation.  Instead of working the ginger’s plump cheeks, the olive-hued Adonis slipped a few fingers inside his new entry, a series of low whimpers slipping out around the invading cock in his mouth.

“Glad to hear it,” Brad purred, slowly stripping Hank’s shirt free.  He reached down and gave the brunette’s bottom a rough squeeze, his voice a smug chuckle.  “And how are the ladies doing?”

“Hungry,” Brian spat.  He heard how desperate he sounded, but he didn’t care.  All that mattered was getting the handsome blonde’s twitching cock inside him as soon as possible.  He could feel Brad pulling his briefs down behind him, and as soon as the other man’s bulbous head brushed against one of his rooting cheeks he fell into action.  Hank moved with a strange muscle memory, leaning forward and popping his hips to swallow his friend in one smooth motion.  “FuuUUuuUUccCCKKkk yyyeeEEEEeessSSS,” he howled, his reduced cock forgotten entirely as the one he borrowed from Brad lit up his insides.  Hank knew he should have been embarrassed by his cracking wails and the way he so eagerly impaled himself, but he was too busy wondering how he’d missed out on something that felt so good for so long.

On the floor in front of him, the raven-headed mountain of muscle was experiencing a similar revelation.  After he’d worked Eric’s fat log into a spit-slick pillar, he’d lowered himself onto his back and readily accepted the burly brute inside him.  Brian’s wide jaw was slack, his eyes glazed as his prominent pecs slammed up and down from the force of the ginger’s piston thrusts.  They made for a mismatched pair in more ways than one, with Eric’s hairy, uncrafted bulk looming over his friend’s machined muscle.  Hank didn’t know who he envied more; Brian for getting to go for a ride on the shorter man’s lusciously thick organ, or Eric for being able to make the beautiful bodybuilder squirm.

But he also knew it was a moot point.  As soon as the buff, virile blonde was finished with him he’d get his own crack at the stocky stud, and while his pitiful cock may have been useless as far as Brian was concerned, his warm tongue and nimble fingers could more than pick up the slack.

He locked eyes with Brian and grinned in solidarity as they were both penetrated and brought to the brink by their friends.  They didn’t need to say out loud what they each knew the other was thinking - they’d both made the right choice.