On Purpose? Parts 1, 2, and 3 (Patreon)

Hannah couldn’t stop a burst of excited energy from pushing through her body. Her bladder was way past sending signals every couple minutes anymore. It was swollen with heavy pee, screaming to finally let go. She couldn’t though, she needed to make sure she could have this accident. She’d peed plenty of times in a diaper while she was alone in her room. But she wasn’t doing that this time, this one had to be in front of her mother.

Her fingers trembled as they sat on her mouse. Her middle finger flicked the scroll wheel. The tumblr page rolled down to yet another woman clad in a diaper. The jealousy burned deeply. Hannah had been faintly attracted to wearing diapers for the past couple years. She’d never put serious stock into those feelings, until on a whim last month, she bought her first pack of diapers. The soft plushy bulk incasing her body. She enjoyed the way they protected her. What made her fall in love with them? Wetting. When the muscles holding her bladder released for the first time, spreading warm pee throughout her diaper, she knew there was no going back.

She wanted to throw away her underwear the very next day. They just felt too thin. There was no way she could let just a little pee out into her panties to feel the warmth again. Her body physically craved the feeling. Even after wearing again that night, she felt the urge to wet her pants again the very next morning. Hannah came to find that feeling never fully faded in the coming month. Something deep inside of her wanted to be wet. Hannah stopped trying to fight it. She couldn’t admit it to herself, but she wanted to give in.

Hannah grimaced in pain. Her teeth felt like they were swimming from the pain. Her strained bladder muscles held back their last accident. Hannah’s eyes widened in shock. She squeezed her hand up in between her eyes as tight as she could.

“I might have waited too long.” Hanna thought, the grim realization washing over her. She felt like if she moved her bladder would release involuntarily. How was she going to get up out of the chair?

“Slow.” Hannah thought, she gently started pushing herself up off the chair. Each increase in angle felt like another ounce of pee in plopped into her bladder. By the time she stood up fully. She knew there were mere seconds. Hannah didn’t expect to have to pee this bad so soon. She had an entire build up conversation planned out with her Mother beforehand. Adrenaline pushed through Hannah’s bloodstream. There was no going back at this point. Thinking on her feet, Hannah turned her head toward the door.

“UM, MOM!!” Hannah yelled, fight or flight kicked in. Her legs started moving independently of her body, she made it out the door, and around the corner. Hannah knew she was a split second away from losing control. Meredith, sensing the urgency in her daughter’s voice, dropped her phone on the couch and got up. She started speed walking toward the sound of her daughter’s voice.

“Hannah? Are you okay?” Meredith’s voice echoed off the hallway walls. Hannah stopped when she heard her Mother’s voice. She wanted to keep going, but she physically couldn’t hold it back anymore. Hannah looked down when she felt the drops. A faint wet patch splattered in the center of her jeans. She watched in awe as it grew darker, then expanded it’s territory. She didn’t want this to happen. It came out as she clenched with all her remaining might. Cool drops started dripping down her leg pants.

“I’m… I’m…..” Hannah tried getting it out, but she couldn’t stop breathing this heavy. The combination of her fear and excitement was too much to get words out. Meredith turned a corner into the hallway. She stopped in her when she saw Hannah standing ten feet from her. She didn’t notice anything wrong with Hannah at first sight. Then her pupils flicked down toward the growing black stain in between her daughter’s thigh.

“Oh my god.” Meredith said, her hands cupped her mouth in shock. “Hannah are you… having an accident right now?” Hannah didn’t immediately respond. Her eyes were mesmerized by the sight, but more importantly, the deepest feeling of happiness washed over her mind.

“Mmm…” Hannah moaned joyfully in her mind. The feeling of drenching her pants was spectacularly warm and comforting. This wasn’t a staged accident anymore. This was genuine. Hannah couldn’t hold it for another second if she tried. It was her first real accident.

“…Yeah. I’m having an accident.” Hannah said, she couldn’t completely hold back her involuntary smile

***

“I don’t think this will be permanent, Hannah. This is just a precautionary measure until whatever illness you’re dealing with passes.” Meredith said reassuringly. She turned her head to the right and gave a sympathetic look at Hannah sitting in the passenger’s seat.

“Of course… I’m 100% with you there, Mom.” Hannah said in fake despondence. Outside her face looked gloomy. Inside, it felt like her skin was on fire. Meredith took one look at the dark pee stain in the carpet and knew what she had to do. After helping Hannah clean herself up into drier clothes, she immediately insisted they head to the local pharmacy to pick up ‘protection’ as she put it. Hannah almost couldn’t believe how easily the plan had worked so far. If she knew it was only going to take peeing on the carpet to get back into diapers, she would have done it months ago.

“We don’t have to keep embarrassing you by talking about it. No 26-year-old wants to talk about that. Anyways, don’t forget you’re going to Auntie Barb’s next week. You promised you would.” Meredith said.

“Wait, what? I’m still going to that. Even after…. This?!” Hannah said, pointing toward her crotch. Meredith waved off her daughter’s worries.

“I’m sure whatever you have will pass by then. I wouldn’t even think about it right now. We’ll cross that bridge when we come to it.” Meredith said.

“Do I want to cross that bridge?” Hannah thought to herself as she looked out the window. She wanted to wear diapers, but did she really want to be in them for an entire week? Let alone to a relative’s house. It felt extremely taboo.

But yet, at the same time, as they pulled into pharmacy, Hannah felt that familiar urge in her chest. The longing for diapers that brought her in this situation in the first place. Her dream was becoming a reality. She didn’t dwell on the relative question once they got out of the car; deciding instead for future Hannah to deal with.

“Alright… where’s the diaper aisle?” Meredith asked, Hannah pretended to scan the aisle signs. She already knew exactly where her diapers were. She pointed toward the back.

“Ummm, I think over there, Mom?” She responded, the two of them walked over to the aisle. When they entered, they were greeted to a long row of colorful diaper packs. Hannah knew the best fitting diapers were in the middle, but she let her Mom scan for them on her own.

“Hm.” Meredith said, stopping directly in the middle of the aisle. She leaned toward the mountain of diapers. Her light brown fingernails slid across the size indicator on a blue pack of diapers. “I think these will fit you.” She said, her hands clutched the sides, and pulled it up toward her face. She closely examined the package. Hannah looked at the stacks of diapers near her while Meredith looked.

“That one definitely wouldn’t hold all my pee.” She thought of a pack of pull-ups. The site of the packages forced the memory of an hour ago to resurface. Hannah shivered in pleasure from it. She re-lived the feeling of the pee streaming down her legs. Completely changing the color of her jeans from light blue to black.

“What if I just pee’d right here…” Hannah thought lazily. She felt her muscles tense at the thought. Every section of her mind focused on the idea. She felt that urgency pull strongly toward the idea. That was met with a swift correction. This wasn’t a private place anymore. This was her town’s pharmacy; she might know people in here. To do it in front her mother too, in the diaper aisle? It would be downright irresponsible.

“Do it.” Hannah thought, “Don’t over think it, or you’ll never do it.” She finished. Living entirely in the moment, Hannah used the short burst of adrenaline to push. She was already decently full again. It was just enough, a squirt of pee jetted out into her pants. Hannah gasped at her action.

“Wait, do I really want to do this here!?” She thought, immediately second-guessing it, but it was too late. Her bladder pressure tipped past being able to hold it. The squirt was followed by a slow trickle of pee beginning to absorb into Hannah’s panties. She looked down helplessly as the warmth spread, from the middle, out toward her thighs. Streams of pee started slithering down her thighs. Dark stains bloomed in the middle of Hannah’s pants.

“Hannah!?” Meredith said astonished. She cradled the pack of diapers in her arm, then rushed over. “Are you peeing yourself again!?” She said, her yell caused a couple heads to turn. Hannah looked up at her mother in dismay. Meredith kicked into Mom mode. She grabbed Hannah’s hand and pulled it.

“Come on, we need to leave immediately. Grab another pack of diapers, now. We need to check out and get you into a new diaper immediately.” Meredith said. Hannah felt a childish excitement wash over her, and her soaked pants.

“Yes Mom.” Hannah said, finishing it with, “mmy..” in her mind

***

“This is literally the most convenient part of my life now.” Hannah thought, as a light trickle of pee streamed out into her diapers. It mostly absorbed into her diaper. Some of it pooled around the edges, before soaking into the dry parts of the front and back. The flow tapered to an end only a few seconds later. Hannah didn’t have much pee stored in her bladder. Her wet mushy diaper made that clear.

Hannah smiled as she gyrated her hips side to side in the near capacity diaper. This was always her favorite part. She loved when it felt like she was swimming in an ocean of her own pee. This put every other thought toward the back of her mind. All she cared about was this feeling in her diaper.

Hannah took to wearing 24/7 quicker than she imagined. After her mother forced her to wear a diaper to bed overnight, she expected one to two days before she might start feeling sick of it. She’d never worn for more than a few hours at a time before this. She was wrong. The feeling of being able to let go whenever she wanted. Not confined to her room anymore, Hannah could stop holding it all day and night. Meredith knew everything that was going on anyways. Hannah was expected to wear a diaper around the house.

Hannah stopped paying attention to the need to go. It felt nice not having to worry about it all the time. If she was in the middle of a game, she didn’t have to get up. She could use her pants like a toilet whenever she wanted. Her mind quickly fell into the pattern of feeling the urge, then quickly releasing it into her diaper. She wasn’t incontinent by any stretch; she’d only had them on for roughly a week. She was quickly developing the bad habit of releasing when she wanted. It was simple to let go now, even when she was in front of her Mother. She even wet her diaper in the middle of a conversation wearing only a tank top and a diaper.

Meredith was confused with Hannah’s rapid control loss. It didn’t seem to add up. One day Hannah goes from having zero issues, to suddenly wetting herself all the time. Meredith couldn’t find any likely illnesses that had incontinence as the only symptom. The way Hannah looked at her accidents too. She didn’t seem super surprised or embarrassed by them in the first place. She came across as indifferent at best about the whole situation. Meredith couldn’t help but field some skepticism.

“I super soaked this one.” Hannah said, she relished in the leaks that beaded out from her gyrating. Her desk chair was developing a slight hint of stale pee. “Need to remember to put a towel down next time.” She mentally noted.

“I should get something thicker this time.” Hannah reasoned, she got up from her chair and walked over toward the closet. Pulling the door open, she looked down at a half-used pack of AB/DL diapers. Hannah undid the tapes of her current diaper, and let it hit the floor in a dud mush. Without hesitation Hannah leaned into the closet and snatched a fresh pair.

“Hannah! Could you come down here for a second?” Meredith called out from the living room. Hannah yelled back a ‘yes’ before laying down on the floor. She slid the diaper underneath her bum, then folded the front up. She expertly taped the four tabs on. Meredith didn’t know about Hannah’s extra diapers, so she threw a pair of loose PJ pants on before walking down.

“Yeah Mom, what’s up?” Hannah said cheerfully. Meredith turned from the TV toward her daughter. She opened her mouth to speak but stopped for a split second. She caught a glimpse of the pink diaper peeking up between Hannah’s waistband. Hannah caught the pause, looked down, then casually pulled her pants up an inch. She didn’t say anything to attempt playing it off.

“Um… I… I was going to ask if you remembered you’re going to Auntie Barb’s tomorrow?” Meredith asked.

“Oh… Yes. Of course, I remembered that.” Hannah lied. Meredith tilted her head to the side and pointed at Hannah’s crotch.

“Do you think it’s smart to go unprotected tomorrow? It doesn’t seem like you’ve made much progress. If I’m being frank, you might be a little worse since last week. I don’t know if I could trust you in big girl underwear right now.” Meredith said. Hannah felt her cheeks flush red. Her mother not only doubted her control, but called it ‘big girl underwear’. She felt the same childish excitement from the pharmacy accident take over. It felt good for someone to doubt her potty training. That childish energy buzzed around her pelvis. She pushed down on her bladder, pushing out every drop.

“I don’t think that’s a bad idea.” Hannah mused, she felt giddy. Part of her recalled feeling weird about wearing in front of her family. In that moment, peeing herself secretly in front of her mom, she didn’t. It felt oddly normal to be in a used diaper in front of her, it’d probably be the same way for her aunt and cousin. There was also a small part of her that felt anxious about being out of a diaper. There likely wouldn’t be an incident, but she’d probably leak a drop or two by accident. It did feel better to wear one just in case.

“Well go pack your diapers then. I’m taking you over there early.” Meredith said.

“Okay, I’ll do it now. Thanks, Mom.” Hannah said, before she spun around back toward her room. Once her face was out of eye shot, she let the smile spread on her lips.

“I’m packing my diapers for Auntie Barb’s tomorrow.” She thought, she couldn’t resist the pleasure anymore. The moment she got back into her room, she dropped her pants, and pulled up her shirt. “People are going to start finding out I wear diapers.” She thought as her mind started running wild. Her hand pressed up against the front of her wet diaper. The initial wave of horny ecstasy filled her mind.

“I’m never leaving these.” Was the first thought to follow.

To Be Continued…