Rebuilding Megan: The Blog of Megan Waters (Patreon)

August 3, 2020

The date went okay. He's got a few issues, but largely he was very nice and sweet, he wasn't was degrading as other feeders have been.

He didn't call me a piggy. He didn't grab my flab without my consent. He didn't force me to eat more than I wanted.

I didn't feel objectified and that's really all I want. Fuck, dating as a fat woman is such a tricky thing to navigate. I think I will call him back though,  I think after the cheesecake he made he deserves a second date.

I know, I know, jesus what a fat cow I am. Going on a second date just because he made me cheesecake. But that's the thing! He made me something! From scratch! All the others just ordered take out. It's like none of them know how to cook, which considering this lockdown you would think they would take the time to at least learn an important skill.

Anyways it was really good cheesecake. I must be becoming a fat woman in mind now too if food is what gets a second date out of me. Food, food, food, I'm ruled by it. I think my project last year has given me an eating disorder, like binge eating disorder or something because it seems like binging is just how I eat now.

Every night I'm waddling (Ugh, I can't believe I waddle now) around my apartment eating something. I can't seem to help myself because I go to bed every night with a stuffed tummy, which as a certified nutritionist and personal trainer is NOT something you should do! It's no wonder I'm ballooning like I am. I think I might actually touch 400 pounds by the end of the year at the rate I'm going.

And then then?

500? I might as well go on my 600 pound life by then.

I'm really starting to think I won't be able to lose all this weight by my will power alone. No amount of diet and exercise can fix this because I'm too hungry to diet and I'm too weak to exercise. I might very well need surgery to get back to normal.

Hah, normal. None of this is normal. It's not normal to be over 300 pounds, hell it's not normal to be over 200! It's not normal to get turned on by obese women eating cake. Having a belly apron isn't normal either.

Anyways in other news in my life, riots are still going on downtown at the court house and people are still being fuck wits when it comes to masks.

WEAR. YOUR. FUCKING. MASK!

How hard is it to understand! I will not date anyone who doesn't mask the fuck up when we're outside in public. I'll walk away the first moment they whine or complain about having to wear it. As a morbidly obese woman I'm at high risk to catch it.

*sigh*

This fucking year.

#datingwoes #datingwhileobese #wearamask #boytoy #2020sucksass