Time For Twat Talk... (Patreon)

I was sitting here trying to come up with a clever lewd title and eventually all I could think of is putting googly eyes over my vagina and telling dumb puns with labial lips. To atone for that crime against comedy, here is the 3D render I made WAY back in 2019 to help me visualize Honoka while writing Becoming Monsters, trusty pink bag included.

Wednesday and Thursday, I edited Therapy 07 PART 1. I wouldn't say it was a rush job, but I gave it a good pass. I cut a little over a thousand words, which isn't some kind of holy ratio, just an indicator to experienced editors that "work was done." In this case, that number was a little low for me, I should have been closer to 2k. Once again, not some kind of hard metric, but this was a flag.

I skimmed it this morning and...yeah, it could use at least one more pass. It could all use around 5 more passes with Editor-kun to get up to polish, but that isn't what I'm doing here and I can't afford Editor-kun anyway. Compared to the previous 2 chapters, there is a dip in prose quality in my professional and self-deprecating assessment.

Not a dip in story, character or setting. I think all of that is there in spades, there is so much to love in this chapter. I even like the chaotic jumping between POV perspectives, feels kind of edgy and experimental where the reader is going "there's so much going on!" and I'm cheering right behind the reader "I know, right!"

Enough excuse making, the chapter is a rough ride. A fun ride, but it suffers from the problems a lot of web serial writing suffers from: it is choppy. I can bemoan that I was on vacation, I was sick, but I hate excuses. It is what it is and while I don't expect you to accept it, I am the one that needs to accept it and move on. Because it is a new month and these stories aren't going to write themselves.

If anyone figures out how to make stories write themselves, I would buy that faster than a magic Orgasm Button.

Also, sorry if Patrons have felt neglected, I will try and do better, posting something like this at least once a month to keep people updated. I'll make Twat Talk a thing. Know that it isn't intentional and I want you all to know how immensely fulfilling it is to have you here and helping me out. Knowing you are here and giving something to me is humbling and dearly needed for me and my life. Thank you. Also know that I'm FAR more reactive than proactive. Asking me a question is far more effective at getting me to do something than sitting quietly with your adoring smiles.

So Therapy 07 P1 is done, I hope everyone loves it, sorry it isn't cleaner but moving forward is the only option. P2 is mostly written. I originally thought, even as close as Monday, that I'd be able to finish everything and drop the whole chapter yesterday. Yeah, that was panic-induced optimism there. I BARELY got P1 out. To make up for it, as one of the next set of Becoming Monsters chapters is the first interlude, I'm thinking I might post 4 chapters this month, one on each of the Mondays. For writing schedule, I have P2 to finish up, then I'll finish the Pirates arc. After that, I am excited to dive into the next Therapy but there is also a nescient idea that has been swirling in my head and I want to get it out of my head. Think Firefly meets Transformers. Not sure if I'll drop that or not, the idea might need more time to "cook." Will largely depend on how long the Pirates chapter will be.

"What about Literotica?"

Excellent question random citizen! To explain, I will quickly sum up what has happened so far. Originally, when I started this, I used Annabelle Hawthorne as the template model...

Back up, let me start a little farther back, some of you are new. Old hats, you can skip the next bit.

I got sick in 2021. Technically, I've been sick for decades, I have a mental disease that is degenerative and medication keeps it at bay. The meds stopped working and I wound up in the hospital to get back on track. I lost a significant portion of my cognitive abilities last year, and recovery has been difficult. I don't actually do as much typing, about 1/2 of everything you see me "write" is dictated and typed up with software, sometimes getting a quick edit to make it look clean. One of the reasons why my writing has gained more conjunctions than it used to have.

ANYWAY, I got sick, writing fiction became difficult. I became discouraged. A friend is writing a book, and she needed a little help with a spicy scene. So I plunked out the scene for her if I wrote it. It was definitely my brand of spice, and it felt good to write. At the same time, another friend commissioned me to write an outline for an erotica superhero story. I said sure, because outlines are easier than prose, but I blasted 25k+ words of outline! I talked it over with my therapist and a plan was concocted to just throw words on a page without worrying about outlines or anything else. Ai Love Therapy was born!

Now I wanted to share. I thought, I'll put my stuff on Literotica. It works for Annabelle, it can work for me. I also hate Amazon, so I should put Becoming Monsters on there as well! The second half of this is where things went wrong. I need to give a bit of a timeline to give context. First week of December 2021, I cancel Kindle Unlimited for Becoming Monsters. I won't go into the headache, but suffice it to say, Amazon said the service would be canceled on Feb 9 2022. Fine, whatever. Second week of December I finish Therapy 01 and submit it. First time, so it takes a bit longer, is published on Dec 18, 2021. I quickly push out the next two chapters and I'm off to the races, each of those chapters averaging 2-3 days from time of submission to time of publication.

I then try and publish Becoming Monsters Ch 01.

There is a lot to cover which I won't, but just know that for a period of 3 weeks and over a dozen submissions, I learned that Literotica doesn't want to use HTML tables and instead they will publish my chapters with the Status boxes as the same graphics I used in the book. This was a headache and a half. Eventually, a mod go involved and I got the first chapter published on Lit. Not perfect, but compared to other chapters all over Lit, it is a Cadillac of smut. The next two chapter were not a problem because the next two chapters didn't have Status boxes, so didn't need to give them images. That was fine, but I couldn't post past Ch 03 until the Kindle Unlimited was up. Worked out, formatted Chapter 04 and submitted on Feb 09.

And waited.

Sent reports and emails. And waited.

When March rolled around, I also submitted Chapters 5 and 6. I had 3 chapters sitting and I had no responses. I resubmitted chapters 4 and 5, thinking there was a problem with their system, but I know believe that was a mistake and just reset me to the back of the queue on March 1. I changed how I did things, bringing everything over to Patreon and organizing a different, delayed schedule. I have chapters 7-9 drafted on Lit, but I won't hit the submit button until this month as part of the staggering. I was getting ready to pull the trigger and move everything over to my blog. Lit then contacted me and let me know they understand my frustrations and they have just been backlogged like crazy. This was a week ago. I respond well to this kind of apology, so I said fine. They said they would have published Chapter 4, but the images were corrupted when I uploaded the images. I resaved the images and reuploaded them. Still taking some time, but this morning I got the notice the uploaded images were downloaded and...just right now, I found that the 3 chapters are schedule in the pending menu to be published on April 2, 3, and 4 respectively. Alright! Finally!

So, there is no definitive schedule moving forward, but this is how I will submit and when you should expect Literotica Publishing: If Lit hits their dates, chapters 4 5 and 6 will be published on Apr 2 3 and 4th. On Apr. 4, I will submit chapter 7, the next two Mondays getting 8 and 9. Chapter 7 has graphics, and the wait time is 2-3 weeks normally, which means is will probably go live in the second half of April, followed soon by 8 and 9. According the new stagger, Therapy 7 will be submitted to Lit probably the first Monday of May, but it will go live that same week. Patreon will get Becoming Monsters 10, 11, 11.5 and 12 in April, Therapy 07 P2, Pirates 03 and either the Transformers idea or more Therapy, depending on time. I might also see about posting stuff on my blog as a test to see how formatting for THAT works, or look into Wattpad because I'm still miffed over the lack of support Literotica has.

Goal accountability, Patreon pulled in four chapters. The three Becoming Monster Chapters summed 14.1k words. Therapy 07 P1 was 15.4k. Total last month is then 29.5k. So close! As atonement, this month is getting four Becoming Monsters chapters. Also getting the Honoka picture up top. I won't always be able to do more just because I do less one month, but I do like to hold myself accountable to my goals.

*reads post above*

Or just count this post. Yeesh.

I'll get back to writing and masturbating, or masturbating while writing. This has been the first edition of Twat Talk. Queefing off.