Evil Within: Put The Shootin On (Patreon)

My adventures in collecting green gel and occasionally seeing something spooky continue in this spooky scary train section of the game, which is totally different from the previous spooky scary subway section of the game. 

That's what you get when a game has 700 chapters like this one. You might see more than one train, and you know what, you're just gonna have to deal with it. What, people are too good for trains these days? Are trains not woke enough for the modern era? Well I'm a sweet trainsexual from trainsylvania and i was woke before you jamokes were born. 

Back in my day we has little VHS tape that all the aspie kids were into called Lots and Lots of Trains, they'd play the commercial on TV in the daytime.. But at nighttime they played a different commercial, this VHS tape was for grown ups, but oddly enough it was also called Lots and Lots of Trains. It just meant something different. 

Point is one time at the video store the tapes got mixed up. I had a friend who rented it all the time and he came to school one day white as a ghost. He must have seen some things he wasn't ready for, but I like to think somewhere there was a real horny guy who suddenly got inspired to become a train conductor cause of that mix-up, and maybe now that guys life is way better. 

Now he's a horny guy on a train, and that sounds like the coolest life ever. Just imagine being a cool conductor getting into entanglements with mysterious women who travel by train. That could be a hilarious sitcom like 2 and a half men. But just to be clear, there's only 1 man on this show, and it's my show so it's obviously me, not Charlie Sheen. It's Bachelor Train. On this train the only rule is there are no rules. Rule number 2 no dudes allowed. 

This will definitely be a thing one day, like all my other things which will also be things. Long have i wandered this desert of content, steadfast in my faith that one day i will have quietly amassed enough savings from my 300 side gigs to fund a career making actual art and never being seen here again. A man can dream, damn you. A man can damn crapping hell dream.