Evil Within: Gettin Dangerous (Patreon)

This is my favorite kind of Blue Glow. The kind where i get stuck on one part for way too long and have to entertain myself by spiraling into madness, eventually getting hung up on some truly inane tangent that becomes a weird running joke i never would have thought of had i not been beating my head against a wall for so long. 

There are some true gamer moments in this one, both epic wins and legendary fails. My awesome sniping talent is only matched by my propensity for getting totally screwed over by dumb silly bullshit. Like getting grabbed by the ghoulies and repeatedly decapitated by a dark carnival juggalo ride. All because my childhood hero and role model instilled in me a deep seated predisposition toward getting dangerous. 

Beyond that what more do i gotta say? I literally just described the entire episode. I get stuck on one part, get dangerous, and get silly. Enjoy. There's nothing else to prattle on about here and i think i'm losing my mind anyway because the game i'm watching has too many Scooby Snacks in it.

Sometimes i put on a jerma stream as background noise to write to, but he's playing a Scooby Doo game right now and the goddamn sound effect when you pick up a Scooby Snack is so loud and constant it's driving me crazy. 

No man could compose a funny patreon post under these conditions all i can hear in my head is crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch god damn doesn't this dog ever get full. No, he doesn't. He's Scooby. The goddamn snacks are literally made to his exact tastes. 

That always confused me by the way. Who the hell manufactures Scooby snacks? Is there a factory somewhere? Do they have other customers besides Scooby and if so why are they called Scooby snacks? Was the snack named after him or he after the snack? 

If Velma can answer me that, I'll watch it. But it won't, and i don't want to because i know it's dogshit and hate-watching is for losers, so somebody's gotta pay me for it.

Why am I talking about Scooby Doo here? Because he's awesome, that's why. Nobody needs a reason to talk about Scoob. Also i just remembered the movie "Scoob!" does in fact explain the Scooby Snack thing. That movie was extremely forgettable. 

None of this has anything to do with The Evil Within, which is the game you're about to be watching. It's early in the morning and i'm about to go have me a a bowl of delicious Cinnamon Life. Paper bowl because my dishwasher is broken. That's a real snack. 

What am I even still typing for? What is this my blog now? Basically, yeah i guess it is. It doesn't matter. I can write anything i want here. But I'm done for now cause that goddamn Scooby Snack noise made me hungry. Goodbye.