AnimeCon Harem 13: Missile Defense (Patreon)
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“Let me buy you something,” Kelly insisted, waving across all the anime merchandise on display across each of the booths. “C’mon.”
“You don’t have to buy me anyth—” Stephanie began to say.
“I said let me buy you something,” Kelly pressed. “I wanna buy you something, alright? You’re my girlfriend, right?”
“Then let me buy you something,” Stephanie beamed. “A present!”
“I’m not real into anime, though,” Kelly shrugged. “So there’s no point in—”
“That’s why I need to buy you something!” Stephanie giggled. “Time to get you into anime!”
“Ehhh,” Kelly made a face. “That’s alright. I’m probably about as into it as I’ll ever get. Why don’t we—”
“Are we going to have date nights where we cuddle and watch anime together?” Stephanie asked. “I mean, someday? When we’re able to?”
“I… guess,” Kelly sulked. “I’ll watch it if I’m there with you, sure. Wait a minute— are you still channeling me? Or are you being Emily? Or something?”
“I don’t know!” Stephanie smiled, bouncing on the balls of her feet. “I’ll have to figure all of it out sometime after the convention. When I have time for myself for a while.”
“I’m gonna say you’re borrowing Emily right now, then,” Kelly put on a smirk. “You were already a weeaboo, but Emily’s pretty extra.”
“Are you going to be dating Emily?” Stephanie asked. “I don’t want to assume. You and I are dating, and each of us is dating Brian, and Brian is also dating Emily. Are we also dating Emily? Are you?”
“Can we just drop all that and say we’re polyamorous?” Kelly shrugged. “You don’t have to go making everything complicated.”
“Polyamorous—what does that mean, exactly?” Stephanie blinked.
“It means we all do whatever, and everyone’s basically cool with it,” Kelly gave a half-hearted explanation. “So no one’s trying to be jealous or anything.”
“I… don’t want any other guys in this,” Stephanie paused. “With us. I’m only okay with Brian.”
“Then, that’s how it’ll work,” Kelly assured her. “You know none of us can say no to you.”
“I-I mean is that okay?” Stephanie began to fret. “You don’t want to be with other guys, right?”
“I don’t think so, no,” Kelly said. “But. There’s a lot of bullshit there to unravel, and I’m not sure I even want to get into it.”
“Please?” Stephanie pleaded, clasping Kelly’s hands. “I’ll—I’ll let you buy me anything you want? I’m j-just, I’m all of the sudden, ah, I’m, this seems like a really big deal, and...”
“Stephanie,” Kelly sighed. “Normally, normal me—the Kelly of a few days ago—would’ve been against settling down with just one guy again if I had the option not to. Don’t get me wrong—I never cheated on Dale when I was with him. I did make out with some girls while me and him were together, but he was into it and that was all fine. In this case with Brian and all of you, also being able to be with you and being able to be with Emily is—is something I’m more than satisfied with. That’s a lot more than I had with Dale.
“That’s the sex part of this,” Kelly continued. “I have a high libido, sure. But, sex with Brian is the best I’ve had, and with you and Emily? Trust me, I’m perfectly fine there. Now, relationship-wise… I’d probably be fine just being ‘official’ with you, and having Brian as just a sorta shared sex arrangement for—”
“No,” Stephanie stopped her with a cute pout.
“No?” Kelly paused. “No, what no? You can’t go—”
“No, you’re going to be Brian’s girlfriend,” Stephanie demanded. “B-because I say so. Because I need you to trust me on that. Because, because—because you need each other. I meant what I said before, ev-even if I didn’t, um, say it out in the best way. I’m the spoonful of sugar that helps the medicine go down, as in, I mean to say, as in I facilitate some of the healing you need and yes, Kelly I love you with all my everything, b-but some of the things that are helping you, th-they’re not all coming from me. They’re not all from me, an-and you need to unders—you need to accept that. You need to let Brian into your heart.”
“Stephhh,” Kelly groaned. “You can’t just—is this what getting stuck with an arranged marriage is like? You’re basically saying I have to be with Brian. Like not just sex—that I have to be with Brian.”
“I… yes,” Stephanie nodded carefully. “I am. Please? I-I’m not saying you have to, I’m just, I’m saying—please please please, trust that I know what I’m talking about? That you do need each other, that we’re all a part of, of helping pull each other up out of these pits we have ourselves in?”
“We’ll see,” Kelly said in a non-committal voice.
“Kelly,” Stephanie sighed. “I’m, I—I am not letting any of us leave this convention until I know we’re all okay!”
“You’re cute,” Kelly traced her fingers along Stephanie’s cheek. “It’s great that you feel that way. It really is. But, I don’t want you tryin’ to bite off more than you can chew, alright? Just because you have some magic bullshit now that lets you see how fucked up we all are—doesn’t mean there’s gonna be some quick and easy fix to all of our shit.”
“Kelly,” Stephanie stared. “It’s important to me. Whether or not it’s easy, or, or quick, those aren’t… those aren’t even factors. Am I supposed t-to, to just give up if it’s not convenient to work through problems so that all of us can be happy? No. I am not giving up, an-and I’m not letting you give up, or put this off, or try to keep living with it, or—anything like that. This is important to me. I’m not letting this go.”
“Maybe that’s it, then,” Kelly growled in frustration. “Maybe I already gave up on some of my me problems. How do you think my life even came to where it is, where it’s going— or, where it was supposed to be going before you and—”
“Okay, okay,” Stephanie cut Kelly off by drawing her into a hug. “Past you gave up on that. That’s okay. But, you’re not that Kelly anymore, an-and. And. Kelly, I’m asking you now, the Kelly of right now, that I love, that we all love, that I believe with all my heart can do anything she sets her mind to, to try again. Can you… can you try again? For me? Please?”
“I… fine,” Kelly grudgingly said. “I’ll try.”
“Really try,” Stephanie pressed. “With all of your effort.”
“Yeah, I’ll try,” Kelly promised. “Just—”
“No just,” Stephanie cut her off. “Come on, let’s go.”
“What, right now?” Kelly hemmed and hawed. “Can we shop or whatever for a bit? I want to—”
Stephanie was already pulling her along through the dwindling crowds of attendees that were browsing the vendor’s room booths, and a mild sense of panic began to rise up inside of her.
Shit, shit—Brian and Emily were over on the SARAH SIDE of the room Kelly thought, already mortified.
REALLY don’t want to fucking run into her right now, because. Well, I just don’t. How would I explain… anything? My hair? The fact that I’m still putzing around the convention when I told her forever goodbye? The fact that I’m meekly following after this shy-looking weeaboo girl, here. Don’t think it ever even came up that I was bi, because me and her already had fucking plenty to argue about. And, I already know just what she thinks of all my life choices.
She kept her head on a swivel, peering through the moving masses of people through to the layout of the booths themselves and praying that her sister Sarah had her setup stuck way over on the far side and out of sight. To her relief—but maybe not her surprise—they didn’t even have to canvas the area in search of their friends. Stephanie seemed to home in directly on Brian and Emily, where they were moseying down one of the nearby aisles together.
She could sense when Brian spotted us, earlier, when he was coming down the escalator—does her thing work like a Stephi-sense? Like, directionally? Can she just track people by sniffing out their familiar feelings in the air, or… something? I know I wasn’t gonna be all into the magic bullshit, but this IS a little interesting.
“Hey,” Brian greeted them the moment they stepped into view. “Everything alright?”
“Stephanie... decided it’s now time for me to resolve all my life problems,” Kelly reported in a dry tone. “So, uh. Here I am?”
“Nice, sweet,” Emily grinned. “Well hey, the best way to—”
“I’m taking Emily,” Stephanie let out a cute huff. “We’re going to work on all of her problems.”
“What? No,” Emily’s mouth fell open. “I haven’t got any. I’ve got Brian, he’s the answer to all my—”
“You’re coming with me,” Stephanie insisted, stepping forward to take Emily by the wrist and then turning to Kelly. “You’re walking around with Brian. I love you.”
“Love you,” Kelly said.
Kelly accepted a kiss on the cheek from Stephanie, and then looked down in amusement to see that Stephanie was taking her by the hand and leading her over to Brian. Stephanie made them hold hands, all while not relinquishing her hold on the exasperated Emily. Steph you’re so fucking adorable. And, Emily—HAH, who’s the tugboat, now? Have fun getting emotionally audited, you little dweeb!
“I love you, Brian,” Stephanie rose up onto her tiptoes to give him a peck on the cheek as well. “Take care of Kelly f-for now. We’ll all meet back up—um, when, when we’re ready.”
“Okay,” Brian chuckled. “Uh, here—Emily. You better take this.”
“Uhhh, yeah, I’d better,” Emily took the plastic bag that held some poster or print they’d apparently bought. “Have fun, guys. But not too much fun. Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do. Unless you really have to, and then—well, don’t get caught.”
“Riiight,” Brian said.
They stood and watched for a moment as Stephanie tugged Emily away, the two girls— bright pink and vivid blue—leaning in close to each other to whisper and Emily attempting to gesticulate wildly with her free hand and nearly swinging the shopping bag into a passerby.
“So…” Brian began, letting Kelly’s hand slip out of his grasp as she pulled away.
“So…” Kelly echoed, crossing her arms in front of herself and not looking in his direction.
“I guess we do need to talk about some stuff,” Brian read Kelly’s stiff body language and seemed even less comfortable bringing any of it up. “If that’s cool?”
“Yeah, I guess so,” Kelly shrugged.
“I mean, the whole magic stuff,” Brian clarified.
“Oh. Okay,” Kelly said, finally looking over. “Sure.”
“Uhhh,” Brian didn’t seem to be sure where to start. “I’m pretty against it, I think. Definitely against it, if it’s influencing all of you girls, because to me—to me that’s not okay. I’m supposed to like, try to keep an open mind about things, and Rebecca told me to make sure I talked with each of you about it to like, see where everyone stands on this first, since it’s an us as a group issue and not just a me issue. So—I guess, I just wanted to hear your thoughts on it.”
“My thoughts on it,” Kelly gave him a blank look. “It’s magic. How am I supposed to know what to think about it? This is all new to me. I’m not real religious or anything, so I’m not automatically against it or thinking it’s blasphemous or all that. I’m just kinda takin’ things as they come.”
“Okay,” Brian nodded thoughtfully. “I get that. I guess I just—I don’t know. Why didn’t you say anything about it to me?”
“I did,” Kelly reminded him, throwing him a look. “I’ve always been completely up front with you, dude. Told you last night all about the magic shit, I even told you that it was a factor. That it was a factor, but not the factor. Remember?”
“You’re… you’re right, you did say something,” Brian realized, his brow furrowing. “Damn. You did say something, and I didn’t even really… wow. Sorry, Kelly. You brought it up first and I guess I kinda… well, not disregarded it, but I definitely wasn’t able to focus on it with all of this other stuff that’s been happening. You actually did say something about it, and it just got, like, put out of my mind. Fuck. I’m real sorry.”
“It’s cool,” Kelly shrugged again. “Actually mean that, it is still cool, don’t even worry about it. It’s been a busy weekend.
“Well, yeah, but that still doesn’t really excuse—”
“Since I said that to you, you and I fucked,” Kelly started holding up fingers one by one. “Then, you and Emily went through your big ol’ heart to heart with each other, and you two fucked. After that, you and I fucked again. Then, this morning, you and Steph fucked. That’s a lot going on at once. Hell, a couple of those fucks were threesomes. Steph and Emily both came back to us last night with fuckin’ bruises ‘cause of your psycho ex, and then there was her whole meltdown just there by the entrance at us.”
Kelly ran out of fingers to hold up on the one hand and just gave him an empty-handed gesture with it before letting it drop.
“It’s been a long fuckin’ weekend—for all of us—so, no, I don’t blame you for missing out on connecting some random specific weird thing I said last night when we were flirting and about to fuck. Alright? I’m not your fucking psychopath ex and I’m not gonna nitpick you over every petty little thing, so stop fucking apologizing. God damn.”
“Alright,” Brian nodded, quick to swallow back the reflexive sorry that would have come out simply because he could tell she was getting upset. “I—uh. Are you alright? I mean, I’m not actually dense and I can tell you’re not alright, but it’s like—I’m not alright because of the maybe rapey magic shit going on, and you’re not alright for some other reason, apparently, so uhh, help me understand what’s up so we can work through this?”
“Rapey magic shit?” Kelly made a face. “What rapey magic shit?”
“From what I understand so far, the charm magic stuff is making all of you interested in me,” Brian explained. “Or, like, affecting all of you. Compelling you, maybe, influencing you, maybe something like mind control? I’m not comfortable with any of that. Basically.”
“Oh,” Kelly gave him a quizzical look. “Nah. I wouldn’t even worry about any of that.”
“I’m… actually really worried about all of that,” Brian winced. “If it’s anything like—”
“The magic doesn’t work like that,” Kelly shook her head. “Not from what I can tell. I think it’s a bit different for each of us, but in each case it’s like, untangling weird personal stuff we have?”
“But, if it’s making all of you attracted to me—”
“Whoa,” Kelly held up a hand. “It’s not; I was already down to fuck like, right when we first met? You’re good looking and have a pretty great body, attraction’s a non-issue. I’ve been up front with that from day one, remember? I was ready to knock boots, and you were all ‘I don’t do casual sex,’ and that was that. Remember?”
“I… yeah, I do remember that,” Brian admitted. “We—”
“We didn’t have casual sex,” Kelly interrupted. “We had… some pretty intense, meaningful sex. Don’t even start getting hung up on all that all over again.”
“Yeah,” Brian frowned. “I just— I’m concerned. You know? This is all a lot to try to figure out. I really, really hate the idea that it’s affecting you, any of you. Makes it easy to doubt any excuses you make for it, because maybe that’s just magic persuading you to think a certain way.”
“That’s dumb,” Kelly shrugged. “You realize Chloe got magicked too, and she’s still just fine shrieking at you all up in your face and trying to slap the shit out of you? In my book that makes a pretty strong case for us still having free will and shit.”
“Chloe’s in all of this, too?” Brian didn’t manage to suppress a grimace. “Huh. I, uh, I didn’t even think of that.”
“Yeah, she got zapped last night sometime,” Kelly said. “Probably when she was trying to shove all the shit from the hotel dresser down on the floor or break something before that other girl—”
“Rebecca,” Brian supplied.
“—Yeah, her, before Rebecca managed to pull her back outta the room,” Kelly finished. “Sorry, I do know Rebecca’s name, just took a second to come to me. But, Chloe’s definitely touched by our same magic stuff—Stephanie says so, anyways, and she’s definitely not being brainwashed into treating you favorably, or uh, even like a human being, really? So, I wouldn’t worry about it all that much.”
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