Domestinol (Patreon)

The town of Darling has been quiet lately! But never fear, Darling Industries has revealed a brand new pharmaceutical wonder! Introducing Domestinol, for when the world is just too much for your pretty little head.

Transcript:

Are you tired of feeling wide awake? Is social awareness simply too much for you? Like millions of women across the country, you may be experiencing symptoms of independence, a harmful and often untreated condition that can lead to chronic willfulness and unwanted feelings of empowerment. But there is hope.

Are you ready to turn those business meetings into bake sales? Are you ready to trade loneliness for a loving family? If your answer is yes, perhaps it’s time to ask your doctor if Domestinol is right for you.

Domestinol is a proprietary, once a day, medication that improves your mood and helps you function exactly as you should. Our unique and innovative formula will help you find your place, and keep you exactly where you belong.

No more worrying about your career or other unobtainable life goals, after a few short months on Domestinol you’ll have a husband and a child to look after and you’ll feel absolutely no need to think about anything too uncomfortable.

You’ll finally be able to kiss those troubles goodbye, with dedicated use of Domestinol you’ll never have to concern yourself with financial freedom or your inability to make big decisions ever again.

Domestinol is brought to you by Darling Pharmaceuticals, a Darling Industries company. A brand you know and trust, Domestinol is a life changing treatment created by the makers of Dronexium, Breastrodial Max and Bimbozall Plus.

Side effects may include: Ditziness, Fainting, increased libido and prolonged periods of confusion. Ask your doctor if you experience the sudden urge to flee the town of Darling, as this may be a serious sign of under-dosage.

Ask your husband if you experience trouble opening jars as this is an indication that your medically-induced domestication is proceeding as planned.

Other side effects may include reduced intellectual prowess, trouble remembering your life before moving to the town of Darling, as well as the uncontrollable urge to have as many babies as possible.

Domestinol. When the world is just too much for your pretty little head.