Darling Public Radio - Episode 5 (Patreon)

Good morning, Darling! I hope you’re all feeling marvelous on this delightful Easter morning here in Pleasant county. I’ve just finished putting on my Sunday best, but before I can run off to morning prayer services I have a brand new episode for you! I’m Mrs. Emily Doll and welcome to Darling Public Radio, Pleasant county’s number one morning broadcast since 1955!

Golly, first off, we need to address the poodle skirt in the room and talk about our recent absence from the airwaves! You see, when you last heard from us here at Darling Public Radio a number of new faces had cropped up around our humble town and we were oh so delighted to share their stories, not to mention we were also just about to have a local election!

Well, I’m so incredibly sad to share with you that, according to Darling Industries listener research, our audience simply wasn’t engaging with our delightful community discourse. So for those few listeners who were invested and oh so curious about the goings on of our town’s newest arrivals, all I can really say is that they have integrated splendidly into our fair little hamlet.

I must admit, I was also quite eager to cover the local mayoral election, but in a shocking twist it was discovered that our former acting mayor, Barry Scott, was in fact an agent for an unknown foreign power! His real name was in fact Vladimir Dmitriy Ivanov and he was trying to subvert our democracy! If only we could figure out who he was working for!

Thankfully the fine men at Darling Industries have shut down the evil plot to take away our freedoms, they have instead chosen to establish a corporate oversight board to manage the functions of our swell town in place of elected officials. You see, you can’t mess with our votes if there is simply no voting! Hah! Take that evil unknown foreigners! Freedom wins. Capitalism wins.  ‘Murica wins.

Now enough of that tomfoolery, let's get back to the reason for the season. I’m talking about that most precious and divine Easter blessing, that sacred gift to all mankind.

Carrot cake. You simply cannot have a successful Easter dinner without a well baked Carrot cake.  But worry not, ladies, if you’re feeling truly domesticated you can find all sorts of recipes on the interwebs..

However if that fancy world of tubes isn’t quite your speed, head on down to Darling Grocers which has recently set up a well-stocked sample kiosk. Once you’ve had a taste of that sweet carrot-y goodness you can pick up a freshly made carrot cake, baked right there in the store! What a marvelous modern convenience!

So don’t forget darlings, this Easter Sunday… Pray, Bake, Love!

That’s the Darling Wives Way!

We’ll see you again real soon and don’t forget to visit our sponsor, Darling Industries, building better communities one family at a time!