Mountain God Chapter 41 (Patreon)

There were many ways to fuck with a neighbor you didn't like. You could TP, their house, you could put turds in a paper bag and light it on fire and place it on their porch, you could throw rotten eggs at their windows, and you could a great many things to fuck with people... But me, with Yasaka's connection to Amaterasu who she was hosting in her palace I went perhaps went a bit too far in my rampant bullying of her.

Every thirty minutes exactly I would send a teleporting ducky that would loudly squeak and squeal shyly at an unholy volume and then when someone grabbed or attacked it, it would explode sending the melted caramel everywhere.

Yasaka screamed when she got the hot sticky caramel into the fur of her tails and but I made sure that her daughter Kunou the sweetheart that she was actually got buried in a pile of marshmallows she had to fight her way out of.

"Moria, are you still tormenting the leader of Kyoto's Youkai faction?" Sakuya wryly asked and I shamelessly nodded giggling in a very ungodly way. "Moria, the leader of the Fallen Angel's Azazel has requested a meeting with you along with the Pope of the church who requests that you travel to the Vatican." Sakuya continued making me raise an eyebrow.

"Did you tell the Pope's messenger that will not be happening at all?" I asked honestly confused and she snickered nodding as she spoke.

"Yes, I took great joy in fact, in telling the mediator that he was a fool who knew nothing of a mountain god and gods in general. If he thought one will just come running when you ask them to come." Sakuya finished with an amused smile.

I shrugged and then gave Sakuya a look as I smiled. "And how has leveling your Time Mage job going?" I asked as I based the whole job system and their abilities on the Final Fantasy Tactics job system that I spent entirely too much time as a child min-maxing.

Sakuya flicked her wrist and a dagger appeared out of her sleeves, and in the moment the knife left her hand a glyph that looked like a clock appeared and the knife dramatically slowed down from the speed at which she chucked it to point it looked like it was just hovering in mid-air. "I already have picked up on how to slow down objects and even other magical attacks. But I still haven't learned how to overpower people's natural magic resistance to affect their own standing in the timeline all other than only changing their speed by some five percent I believe." She explained pouting.

At her words, I looked into the 'Dungeon' and watched the millions of people within, whether they be tribals from Africa to the bog-standard Americans who came in. All were welcome and all could prosper within the dungeon as all monsters within the dungeon came with mana cores that could be used to buy stuff in the shops surrounding Orario and already the mortal governments learned the terrible secret of Orario.

The truth is that magic stones would replace the entire energy industry.

Electricity to fuel a whole family household for a month? The man of the household just needs to come to kill a couple of dozen goblins with a shotgun and the fingernail-sized magic stones could produce enough power to fuel said household for the month.

I even went as far as to make boxes that could be plugged into people's houses for them to put monster stones within the box and thus it would directly fuel the building's electrical needs so long as there were monster stones within the box. And for people who didn't give a damn about electricity or wanted to use the monster stone's pure mana to do rituals and other spells, they didn't have the mana capacity to do. The monsters inherently were all technically edible and their materials could be used for interesting stuff.

"Yes, things are quite interesting," I said watching the interior of the dungeon with great interest before bursting into laughter as I saw the person I was honestly quite interested in... Being himself.

-Issei Hyoudou. Dragoon Knight, level 45-

Sure his level was just above average... But by the gods, the fucking idiot was working far harder in the dungeon than could be expected. Why? Because he managed to fulfill all the dreams of men and managed to pick up a waifu in the dungeon.

"Anyway, how is testing the obstacle course going?" I asked smiling and her eye twitched and she looked at me with a gimlet glare.

"I hate you a bit Moria... Going through portals shouldn't be nearly as complicated." Sakuya literally whined stomping her heels on the ornate marble floor and I chuckled as I made the first section of the tournament a test of intelligence and what was one of the best puzzle games in my previous life? Obviously Portal and I were going to love watching people fall into the pits of fake lava and get kicked from the tournament.

Either way with Sakuya and other people testing my ideas for the tournament, watching Issei Hyoudou getting dommy mommyed by a dhampire waifu he picked up with his delicious' dragon blood, I was filled with entertainment especially as Sakuya spoke up with her eyebrows twitching. "Lord Moria, Donald Trump wishes to meet you about purchasing a large number of monster stones."

At that, I couldn't help but burst into laughter. "Sakuya... Set up the meeting for noon." I said seriously and she raised an eyebrow.

"You plan to push the meeting with the Tamamo Cult back?" She asked and I paused before nodding slowly.

"Yes tell them I have an urgent business and just to push it back an hour or two... A man must meet his meme idols." I said shamelessly making Sakuya roll her eyes and then she held my shoulder making me pause.

"Moria I am glad you are happier on Earth... Would you care to have dinner with the Scarlet Devil Mansion ladies tonight?" She asked and I nodded with a soft smile as her hand on my shoulder squeezed before she skipped through time to go into another room to respond to whoever was talking for Trump.