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Rise of Skywalker Trailer Reaction: IT BLOWS!!! (Patreon)

Published:
2019-10-22 17:06:51
Imported:
2021-07

Content

Ah, what a f***ing disaster, this thing landed with a thud and a flop.  Could the lack of plot in this abomination be further proof that the reshoot rumors were accurate after all?  Watch and judge for yourselves!

Files

Rise of Skywalker Trailer Reaction | Proof The Rumors Were True?

The Star Wars Rise of Skywalker trailer dropped last night and the verdict is in: DISASTER! The trailer not only sucked, it also seemed to validate a number of rumors, including numerous plot leaks and allegations of massive reshoots. Here is my Rise of Skywalker trailer reaction, and my analysis of what went wrong. #riseofskywalkertrailer #riseofskywalker #starwars

Comments

Stone_Loki

I really thought at first I had clicked the wrong video. Was watching with Jeff on WCB and thought, I’d this a joke? Am I on the wrong stream? Remember folks, JJ isn’t messing around on this one lmao!

Anonymous

Endless Puke-a-thon

Anonymous
>>28156102

Movie for kids??? Who'd wanna expose a young mind to such garbage?

P.H. Vale

The sporses are back. Rey still has no personality. Kylo still has a face only a mother would love and keeps forgetting his helmet. CGI Leia is just... WRONG. 3PO has a software glitch or his optical sensors are broke, because the gang of cardboard cutouts are not his friends. And where did the "Resistance" get all those people and ships from within 2 days? JJ is going to prove again that he cannot finish a story, that he can't even tell a story, and that his only strength is flashy visuals. Add insult to injury: I don't recall Leia training at any point in the Disney Canon. I read the books up to "Leia Princess of Alderaan." At no point did she train in the force. Not in Aftermath (she was pregnant there, and went into labor during the end ceremony, but, thanks to Chuck Wendig's great understanding of female anatomy, she stayed there), not in Bloodline (where she's roughly in her late 30s, early 40s, and still a senator.) Disney has a story group that, instead of having control over the current canon, does nothing. They don't understand coherent storytelling. It's just one massive mess.

Anonymous

No one will ever find a more biting, in-depth and damned entertaining analysis/reaction than Lord Doomcock’s!!

Anonymous

I hope you're wrong, Doomcock. I hope there won't be any Star Wars fans leaving cinemas in disgust. I hope they'll boycott Disney's rubbish. I know I will. Incidentally, you should too, Doomcock. I'd remain one of your Vagabonds if you admitted that the world can manage without your review of The Rise of Skywalker. Don't ask us to reject this film but go and watch it yourself 'because you have to because you're a critic and because your fans... blah blah blah....' I think all your fans will respect you more if you refuse to watch it yourself. You know - because you've told us more than once - that if you pay to see this film Disney will laugh at you and dump all over you for being a witless dumbass for whom they can vomit and/or defecate 'films' and still rake in the cash.

Anonymous
>>28157011

I think it's funny that Kylo spent all that time repairing his stupid helmet (instead of just making a brand new one)... and then he STILL doesn't even wear the thing half the time.

Anonymous
>>28157375

If he's going to see Rise of Soywoker in theaters (to review it on YouTube) I believe he's going to buy a ticket to another movie (and then slip into the Star Wars theater). I've heard a lot of people talking about doing that. I myself am just going to stay home entirely. I don't want to see the movie... just the scathing YouTube reviews.

Anonymous

Remember when KK said, "The Rise of Skywalker... that title doesn't mean anything..." Well, it seems they wanted an ambiguous title because they had NO sense of what the story would be. "Just say SKYWALKER somehow. That'll put asses in seats."

Anonymous

Doomcock knocks it out of the park and knocks the park out of the park too with his lastest autopsy on the trailer for J.J. "Frankenstein" Abraham's incompetenly switched together collection of rotting body parts Pukasfilms is ironically calling "The Rise of Skywalker". For me the lobotomy of C3PO is a metaphor for what Disney has attempted to do to all Star Wars fans since 2015. Sorry Disney but your attempts to perform this experimental brain surgery on many of us has failed catastrophically. We have resisted and we will never yield to your intellectual barbarism. Doomcock is our Gandalf to your Balrog and Doomcock says to you "you shall not pass" !!! Hail Doomcock and Harvey and The Fandom Menace !!!

Anonymous

BTW, Doomcock, I like the end of the vid where you talk about the meaningless fight choreography. That's been consistently bad in the entire sequel trilogy. There's a really funny (and really long) blow-by-blow video (made by Shadiversity) where he talks about how AWFUL the fight scene is in Snoke's throne room. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qyzwBWsqqw8

Anonymous

Make tshirts and posters! We’ll wear and display. Without respect, we reject!

Anonymous
>>28158284

Some people said they felt sad that C3PO was dying. I got a sense of relief from that scene. It was like a mercy killing! I thought, "Thank god he doesn't have to suffer with this miserable Disney nonsense anymore."

Anonymous

Well done, sir! This looks like a hodgepodge of scenes made specifically for use in a trailer, which is probably what the whole movie will be like. Yet, there are normies out there who somehow seem to think it "looks fantastic." Good catch on the bad fight choreography; I must have missed it in the miasma of mediocrity. (The music is terrible, too; it's loud and blaring, as if they turned it all the way up to 11 to say to the audience, "feel something, dammit!")

Anonymous

That trailer is such an incoherent mess. I said it elsewhere but how the hell is the throne room in one piece? A space station blows up and the bloody chair doesn't even move 🤦‍♂️

Anonymous
>>28161215

The whole idea of visiting the wrecked Death Star is just stupid. Considering how big the entire Death Star was, isn't it convenient that the most recognizable pieces just happened to land close together, almost completely intact, within a limited geographic area (presumably on Endor) that can be reached on foot, *without* sinking or getting buried by other debris? Speaking of Endor ... wasn't Kylo Ren already there once before, to retrieve the melted Vader mask shown in TFA? I guess he just missed that the Emperor was there, too, supposedly still alive somehow, hiding in the wreckage.

Silentphil9

Sarah Michelle Gellar, I implore you. STOP your insane husband from speaking.

Anonymous

Great analysis, Lord Doomcock! May Disney’s failure soon be complete. Nein to IX!

Anonymous

Space Horses riding on Star Destroyers. Can you imagine the mindset of somebody who actually thinks that is a cool idea? Can you imagine Space Horses in any of the original Star Wars movies??? (I can just visualize Admiral Piett in "The Empire Strikes Back" bringing the bad news to Vader's chambers: "My Lord, we're under attack ... a herd of space horses are stampeding on the outer hull! They appear to be lead by a short Asian woman wearing a burlap sack!") If that had actually happened in "Empire", I would have thought it was stupid and incongruous, even when I was a kid. I still do.

Anonymous
>>28183918

"but it's a kids movie!" notice it's a kids movie when it's criticized, but when it's not criticized, they never say, "wow, what a great kids movie!" i love how it's a kids movie when it's convenient to call it that. i can handle space horses, but i am more pissed off about the throne room where Luke and Vader fought even existing...hell, the 2nd Death Star being there period. Star Destroyers coming out of water, Rey waits to train in the 3rd movie??? the fact that Ep 9 will be canon making the OT worthless, perhaps! i rather have space horses any day, over how they ruined everything else in this franchise. but why should i care, honestly...there is no way in hell i'm going to see this, even if it turns out to be the greatest movie ever made. fuck, Disney!

Anonymous

i honestly didn't think the trailer itself, was that bad. it also wasn't that good. i felt nothing watching it. the more i watched it, the more angry i was becoming because of how they ruined this once great franchise, so wait, i did feel something...pure anger and disappointment. that's right, those are emotions too. Luke, Lando, Han, Leia...i bet they do some shit scene where they force ghost them together and say, "hey, we gave you what you wanted, didn't we?" just like how Terminator 2 ended the story for me, Aliens wrapped things up as far as i'm concerned, and the original trilogy ended with Return of the Jedi. even if the EU is fantastic, 'Return' ended very, very nicely. so, it's not so much this new trailer i thought about, it was more how when i was a kid back in the late 70's/early 80's, how i felt the magic of this franchise, and how it made me feel...Disney Star Wars has no legacy! no magic! it's a franchise for the Tumblr crowd. Disney Star Wars just isn't for me. thank god i can still watch the OT, even the prequels. as always, FUCK, Disney!

doomcock
>>28155708

Jar Jar is going whole hog on THIS one...and thus the destruction of Star Wars will be complete!

doomcock
>>28158375

Thank you for this TortureVision! Normally I look more at the meaning of things than at details like sword fights, but it was so glaring I found it absolutely appalling!

doomcock
>>28158487

Your wish is my command Jason! https://www.zazzle.com/without_respect_we_reject_t_shirt-235250165416070110

doomcock
>>28179576

Is he still yakking? Has he no sense??? I smacked him down, he needs to STAY down!

doomcock
>>28190494

Well said Edge Scarborough! I hear you my friend, and I agree...anger is definitely feeling something... :D

Anonymous

This is Star Wars in name only. For people with nothing but air between their ears. Star Wars in film ended with return of the jedi.

Anonymous

100K+ views! Impressive ... most impressive!

Bird of Evil

I think Star Wars began going off the rails when it was revealed Darth Vader was Luke's dad, necessitating Obi-Wan's force ghost having to tell Luke later on "Anakin was seduced by the Dark Side and became Darth Vader, so IN THAT SENSE Darth killed Anakin".

Bird of Evil

How much better if Anakin and Darth were brothers, with the former killed by the latter and a multi-generational feud being set off. This would resemble the feud in Greek mythology between the twin sons of King Oedipus, Eteocles and Polynices, who hated each other so much they had fist fights in the womb!

Bird of Evil

If Star Wars and the MCU had only remained true to their original vision, if only they had been made to entertain and on occasion provide moral/ethical messages, Disney would be sitting on a gold mine! Instead Disney has turned Star Wars and the MCU into sewage pipes delivering SJW/Marxist propaganda. We have gone from the Hero's Journey to the Mary Sue's Trip to Nowhere.

Anonymous

Where are the keys to my Stardestroyer? I have to bombard spezial spots on earth. Witch on first Disney, Luckarts or JJ a hard choise

Anonymous

Reshoots, Schmi shoots. I'm not paying for any more bullshit, and I suspect neither are any of your followers, Lord. I was pondering a year ago how these people must feel putting work into something that will be the theatrical equivalent of a defective firecracker that sputters a bit and even goes poof, but ultimately disappoints.