Flops E. Bunny (Patreon)
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This is the Story of Flops E Bunny
And the little girl named Freddy.
Freddy loved Battle axes and Dolls
Soccer and every flavor of music,
Coloring and computer parts,
Sitting in the deep woods behind her house
While attempting to understand existence
The model of which, in her mind,
was not unlike her catastrophically curly hair
Freddy loved all of these equally
But what Freddy loved most of all
Besides her family
Was Flops E Bunny
Now Flops was not just any bunny
For Flops was an Heirloom
Flops had been stitched into existence
for Freddy’s Grandmother
Who in turn gave it to Freddy’s mother
And now Flops belonged to Freddy
All had been well
All had been right
Since the first moment
Since the first stitch
Until this very moment
When Flops found itself
In the imperious care
Of Freddy
Freddy fell deep into sleep each night
With the patchwork pet
In her matchstick arms
Each morning
Freddy would awaken
With Flops somewhere in the bed
Some mornings Flops would be in Freddy’s arms
some mornings Flops would be in all
Manner of locations about the room
Some mornings Flops would be as he had been
Some mornings Flops had a wear or a tear
So
Without a care Freddy would merely think nothing of it
Skip or snake slither downstairs to find her mother
Giving Flops to her mother
Who would in turn
Turn her over
To her grandmother
Who would fix Flops up in moments
For when working on Flops
Time did not stick to Grandma
The way it did at all other times
At the very end of their brief reunion
Grandma would
Inspect Flops
Running her care slowed fingers over Flops
Stopping specifically on the ever unchanged
Black Velvet Heart Patch
At the center of Flops chest
Giving it a knowing squeeze
Feeling the bump
Confirming that it was still there
Many days passed
Many nights went uneventful
Until that night
The night after Flops got left at Tabitha’s house
After the cartoon themed birthday had run it’s sugar coated course
Freddy was not concerned about Flop’s absence
She was capable of sleeping
Flops would be returned tomorrow at school
So no need to concern herself
With that rationality
Freddy slipped into slumber
Not giving it another thought
Her brain shutting down
Amidst thoughts of a cataloging system for fish in an aquatic library
The next thing Freddy knew she was awake with a gasp
The sound of a blade sinking into melon still ringing in her ear
So as she got ready that morning she told her mother of the tale
Of what had happened
In the realm of dreams that night
All the while her mother spun around the house throwing life into some kind of order
half hearing her daughter
The whole time
After having fallen asleep
Freddy found herself pulled under the bed by a myriad of grotesque stuffed animals
Those lost unwanted things who had forgotten the joys of being cuddled
Too consumed by spite to find new humans
They resigned themselves to taking unprotected ones
Keeping them until they were used up
Somewhere in the charred forests of nightmare
They would cast the bodies
Never to be seen or heard from again
Freddy found herself pulled though worlds that were threaded together
By doors that led from one dream scape to the other
Portals from
City to space
Cathedral to Sewer
Cave to Seaside
Freddy fought but found herself bound
Freddy said mean things to the smelly bears
Freddy kicked perpetually soaked dragons
nothing stopped them
All of them urged on by their leader
A stuffed Pig they called Petunia
With an eye hanging from a string
Half seared but still able,
Limping all the while
It was when they came to find themselves in the belly of a bare metal cargo plane
That they all heard the tin bell ring of a playskool phone
Which somehow rang out above the uninsulated cabin of the aircraft
All the stuffs in the plane searched high and low
Until finally a frog found the phone
Who listened to it
Then shakily held it out
for Petunia to take from his shaky spaghetti like arm
Freddy couldn’t hear the call
Merely saw the color pale out of the neon pink of the pig
Petunia hung up the phone with a slam
Breathed a moment
“Flops found us,”
Screamed Petunia
all the stuffed animals
Began to run about hysterically
Seeking out a door
Not expecting the cabin door to open from the outside
Or the lights to go out when it did
There were little cartoonish cries of pain then
Gurgles like mouths full of soda pop
Thuds of plush bodies hitting the steel floor
One of the plushes
An otter
Yelled he found the door
Just in time to thump against it’s frame
Blubbering about God
Sobbing about not wanting to go out like this
Petunia and the remaining stuffs
Dragged Freddy through the door
Over the Otter who had been split down the middle vertically
It’s stuffing still oozing out in a slow tickle
Petunia and the stuffs
Staggered through the streets of New York in the 1920’s
A Killer Whale stuff’s head exploding
a spray of polyester fiber fluff
Flitting on the air while Petunia piled them into a bus
The bus flew through the streets as the passengers screamed
Petunia not knowing how to drive
The swirving getting worse
Once the windshield shattered
Forcing Freddy to curl up and cover her face
Finally emerging to see three stuffs done in
A Velociraptor whose head had been run through on the glass in the windshield Fram
A Gorilla who arms had been torn off and it’s head caved in
The frog who had answered the Phone screaming outside the bus as the back tires rolled over it
Petunia drove the Bus into the Washington Square Arch
Emerging in the woods of Fantastica,
Bringing the vehicle to an abrupt stop
In the forest shared a border with any number of magical lands
Petunia took an inventory of his remaining stuffs
Freddy heard it but did not see them all call out until it got to the Squid stuff
That got half way through but then inhaled hard and went silent
Freddy turned over to watch
The Rhino get strung up into the canopy of the tress
A stuffed reindeer with no nose disappear with a yelp behind an oak tree
Memory foam rolling out near it’s roots
Some children’s animated show monster freaked out and tried to run
Only for a sharpened stick to impale him in his tracks
The point sticking in the grass
White tready stuffing gushing down the knotty spear
It was only Petunia , An oversized Bear, and Freddy now
Petunia knew where to go
Running with Freddy over his shoulder
The Bear close behind
Until they reached a great waterfall
Which Petunia threw Freddy off of
Jumping in himself after Freddy hit the water
The bear close behind
Freddy and Petunia tumbled up onto the valley floor
The Valley Petunia knew all too well
This Valley of Torn Pages, said Petunia,
It’s smooth onyx walls lead up beyond contemplation
Each day it rains acid,
beneath a sun so bright it scorches and stains even squeezed closed eyes
each night
it snows ashes that smell of the those whose stories that have been burned, never to be read again.
Each day
the eyes of the ravenous ones watch you from above the edges of the valley
Each night
The Ravenous seek to feed, pray you are not to slow to get caught
Freddy heard the words and thought Petunia a gloomy gus
Which was a phrase she had used all her life,
That she had learned from her mother
That she had learned from her mother
It was a phrase that all at once she heard from behind her
In a voice so gravely that Freddy could not believe it came from
The patchwork Bunny
That ripped the head off the oversized bear
Tossing it to the ground
You had to know this would happen, Petunia,
Flops strode slow at the Pig, Poly fill dripping off his paws,
You knew I would come for you.
If we don’t deserve to be loved,
Petunia pulled a human femur out from amongst the rocks,
Then they don’t deserve to be loved either.
Never once thinking you could simply find the ones who were without,
Flops said,
It’s time for you to show the others why you don’t take from me.
Freddy watched as the two danced about the valley
Petunia swinging repeatedly
Some making contact
Others flying wildly
All the while Flops waited
Until Flops caught the bone
Snapped it over his corduroy knee
Flops proceeded to stab Petunia repeatedly
Flop’s paws moving in blurred fury
Until at last Flops drove the two pieces into Petunias knees
Headbutting the Pig
Leaving Petunia broken and gushing fluff from the dozens of wounds
“I shall leave you here until the Universe swallows itself whimpering its way out of existence”
Flops stood over the semi conscious pig,
“Broken and bleeding but never unconscious
Torn apart but always right here for all too see
A memorial to any foolish enough to ever think about touching my Freddy and her family.
And do you know why, Petunia?”
Petunia merely coughed up fluff
“ Because you’re a big dumb stupid face.”
Of all the things Freddy had bore witness too, this made Freddy gasp.
“Time to go, Freddy”, Flops turned towards the girl, “Time to wake up for Waffles”.
Flops kissed the girls forehead and all at once,
Freddy was awake.
In the hour or two after, Freddy told the story to her mother.
Within three, Freddy was at school
In those moments before circle time,
When Tabitha returned Flops to Freddy
Freddy couldn’t help but notice the scratches and tears
That had happened in her dream last night.
The implausible nature of it did nothing to effect our young Freddy
However,
Instead she hugged Flops tight
Feeling the little orb deep inside of Flops
Knowing that somehow it was hugging her back
Before putting him in her backpack