Dr. Jonathan Crane, MD - Entry 042 (Patreon)

LUCENZO: Wake up, Dottore.

CRANE: Mmm.

LUCENZO: It is time.

CRANE: Hngh… time for what.

LUCENZO: Time to operate.

CRANE: (sigh) … Fine.

(Bolton is already prepared. Out cold. Jon washes his hands, has a mask put on)

CRANE: Extraction of the Amygdala, Dr. Jonathan Crane present. Assisted by Dr. Lucenzo Valentino. Patient is Lyle Bolton. Surgery beginning at <TIME>. Tightening Mayfield clamp. Beginning on left side. Performing Temporal Keyhole Craniotomy.

(wet drilling)

CRANE: Well, whaddya know… you do have a brain after all. Preparing Endoscope, and… there we are. Navigating under the temporal lobe… I… will you put that god damn switch down? What am I going to do when I’m working on a man’s brain?

LUCENZO: You are full of tricks, Dottore.

CRANE: Not when I’m working. I didn’t become a Doctor with tricks. Now put it down.

(puts down switch)

CRANE: Thank you. Push the damn thing, I’d wind up severing an optic nerve, then we got a half blind Bolton bitchin’ til my dyin’ day. Coulda just used Propranolol. *sigh* There you are. Cut. Cauterize. Extracting Amygdala. And… done. Left amygdala removed.

(alarm goes off)

LUCENZO: More guests have come to play.

CRANE: Goody.

LUCENZO: (using a walkie talkie) Galatea, mi amore. Another fool has come, bring them to me. You. Back to work. Other side.

CRANE: Both sides in one session? He needs time to heal up.

LUCENZO: We have no time! (strikes CRANE) Now finish it.

CRANE: (laughs)

LUCENZO: You find this amusing?

CRANE: This? No. I was just thinking how much I’m gonna enjoy guttin’ you like the pig you are.

LUCENZO: Mmhmmhmm… but not today, Dottore. Work.

(wet drilling, then a distant caw)

CRANE: (chuckle) I’ll be damned.

LUCENZO: Que?

CRANE: The Hessian rides tonight. (short laugh) Performing Temporal Keyhole Craniotomy on right side.