Running Late For Work (Patreon)

Shit, I’m going to be late again!

It was an unfortunate truth that Jamie Butterington had arrived to work late more often than he’d actually arrived on time, and considering he had only been employed for two weeks, he was pretty sure that he was making a terrible first impression. With each subsequent late arrival stacking against him, Jamie was already mentally preparing himself for the worst. In fact, he knew that if this trend continued, he would surely find himself back moping in the unemployment line. Although the job itself wasn’t anything all that glamorous or rewarding, as he was only a concessions worker at the Heinz Field stadium in downtown Pittsburgh, it was absolutely essential in helping cover the extortionate rent that his parents charged. They claimed that they only demanded so much in order to try and motivate him to find a better job and move out, but Jamie knew that this was blatantly untrue. Throughout his life, he had known his parents to be greedy and conniving, so despite feeling taken advantage of in such a scummy way, Jamie wasn’t shocked by the fact that they seized the opportunity to use their own child to line their own pockets. Jamie desperately wanted to escape but truthfully he didn’t really have any friends or more reliable extended family to lean upon, so he was forced to remain under the roof of his parental oppressors.

To call the atmosphere in the Butterington house “frosty” would be underselling it majorly; they were experiencing an ice age. Barely a day would go past without Jamie’s father referring to him as “an embarrassment” and his mother was constantly scolding him for what she perceived to be a lazy attitude. It didn’t matter to them that Jamie was trying his best; it would never be enough. The only time that there was any peace in the home was when the Pittsburgh Steelers were playing, as every member of the Butterington clan was a hardcore fan of their home team.

Considering the intensity of his fandom for the Steelers, Jamie thought that working at the stadium they played at would put him in high spirits. Unfortunately that wasn’t the case, as he had been scheduled to work at the fast food counter during every single home game that the Steelers were playing that season, which provided several disadvantages. For one, Jamie experienced the game second-hand through announcements on loudspeakers throughout the concessions area in between every single play on the field. As such there was barely even any point in him watching the game back after his shift had ended, considering the play-by-play he received via the announcements along with the reveal of the final score.

Missing out on the games wasn’t the worst thing about working at the fast food counter in Heinz Field though - oh no, that was definitely how he was treated by both the customers and his managers. Jamie was pretty sure that servants in Ancient Rome were treated better than he was, as during any given six-hour shift he experienced about as much harassment as he had during an entire year at high school! His slender build and waifish facial features made him an easy target and it was an unfortunate truth that the vast number of sports fans that came to the stadium saw him as beneath them in every way.

He’d only had eight shifts so far, but during every single one of them he’d had customers either refer to him as a “queer”, “homo” or even a “fag”. While it wasn’t the first time Jamie had ever had such words thrown at him, they still stung to the point where he often found himself reporting the various incidents to the manager on duty. Unfortunately that was when he found out just how tuned out the managers were, as they merely shrugged their shoulders and dismissed it as a hazard of the job. He was shouted at regularly for things beyond his control. The customer had to wait a few minutes for their food? Totally his fault. The stall was all out of ketchup? His fault again. The customer missed a touchdown because they were standing in the queue for food? Once again, he was somehow to blame.

If I didn’t need the money so badly, you bet your ass I’d quit, Jamie seethed as he ran from the bus stop towards the stadium, darting between the steadily building crowds outside. The game wasn’t even due to start for another three hours and yet Steelers fans had already come out en masse, seemingly just to make him that little bit later for the start of his shift. With the hectic crowds that he was still struggling to weave his way through, Jamie knew that his only hope for clocking in on time would be to make use of a shortcut through the stadium that one of the more seasoned employees had pointed out to him the week prior. They had warned him that it could be a little dangerous, as it cut through an area that was supposed to be reserved for the players and coaching staff, but if he was quick enough to pass through without being caught, he could totally get to his stall right before his shift started!

Unfortunately being new to the job meant that Jamie didn’t quite know his way around the stadium as well as he should, and somewhere along the way he’d definitely taken a wrong turn, because he didn’t recognise anything at all.Panic began to set in as Jamie continued to pick up his pace, eventually breaking into a run as he bolted down a long and featureless corridor. He could feel his cell phone beginning to vibrate in his pocket, but the unlucky man made no attempt to check it, knowing that it surely was his shift manager eager to cuss him out for not showing up on time. Absolutely everything seemed to be plotting to make it the worst day of Jamie’s life, but the truth was actually far from that.

Still moving as fast as he possibly could, Jamie rounded a corner and had only a split second to acknowledge that there was a solid wall of muscle in front of him. If it wasn’t for his intense fandom of the Steelers then he probably wouldn’t have been able to so quickly identify that human-shaped obstacle as TJ Watt, the team’s star defensive player. Under other conditions Jamie would have been elated to meet the dominant athlete, but Jamie’s run of terrible first impressions was destined to continue. Due to moving at such a quick pace, the man found himself unable to slow himself down in time to prevent a forceful collision with the other man, something that was only exacerbated by the brisk pace that TJ was walking at while staring down at his phone. 

Forehead met forehead and the two men recoiled, quickly losing control of their feet and dropping to the ground where their skulls experienced further blunt trauma by bouncing off of the hard concrete. For a fleeting moment both Jamie Butterington and TJ Watt were knocked out cold. Then everything changed.

As Jamie began to rise back to consciousness, all he could think about was how it felt like his brain was trying to break free from his skull. There was a throbbing and unforgiving pain that continued to persist even as Jamie pushed himself up into a seated position. It took considerable effort for him to force his eyes open, but when he did, he was forced to wait until the world stopped spinning and his vision cleared up. Once that had finally happened though, Jamie was quick to identify that something very, very strange had happened.

The last thing he could remember was looking into the startled eyes of TJ Watt before their heads had crashed together, but the guy sprawled on the floor across from him didn’t look like the TJ Watt that was etched into Jamie’s memory. Parts of his face were definitely similar but the body type was all wrong. The star linebacker was supposed to be six-foot-five and about two-hundred-and-fifty pounds of pure muscle, but this guy looked about eight inches too short and eighty pounds too light! Even more strangely, the guy was wearing a uniform for the same fast food stall that Jamie worked at! Maybe it wasn’t TJ that I hit after all? But I thought…

Truth be told, Jamie wasn’t sure how much he could trust his memory. His mind was totally scrambled - he couldn’t even remember leaving the house to get to work! Even though he knew that logically he must have taken the bus from the family home to the stadium, Jamie seemed to have memories of traveling in the back of an uber and fielding questions from an overly chatty driver. But that wasn’t me… was it? The memory was so distinct but it also didn’t make any sense. He didn’t have enough spare change to even pay for an Uber without having to sacrifice a meal somewhere down the line, so it had to be a false memory of some sort!

Jamie’s turbulent battle with his own memory was placed on pause by the slow rousing of the other man. He looked every bit as confused as Jamie felt, but when their eyes locked, the confusion quickly turned to panic. “Wh-who are you?” the fragile-looking man (TJ?) exclaimed in a frightened and somewhat effeminate voice. “What happened? My head…”

“I-I’m Jamie. We had a bit of a collision,” Jamie started to explain before stopping short. Why did his voice sound so low and husky? “I think… I think we might be concussed or something. Do you remember your name?”

“Of course I know my name,” the other man snapped, only for his confidence to falter a second later. “It’s… it’s TJ… I think,” he mumbled, “Yeah, that sounds right! But my surname… I can’t remember my last name!” The man fell further into distress as he scrambled to his feet and looked down at his hands then at the rest of his body. He quickly pressed his hands to his chest and began to pat himself down like the security guards on the door of the stadiums did to entrants. This experience only seemed to send TJ spiraling further into panic. “Why am I so small?! What am I wearing? This uniform…”

While the other man progressed into his mini-meltdown, Jamie had taken the time to rise to his feet as well, but that simple action presented him with another surprising revelation: he was much taller than he remembered being. In fact, he was towering over the other man and a quick glance between them suggested that he was carrying a lot more weight too! No, it wasn’t just weight - his body was all of a sudden stacked with strong muscles! Jamie clenched his fists and admired how his huge biceps bulged and meaty forearms tensed, then flexed the pectoral muscles hidden beneath… Wait, a Pittsburgh Steelers shirt? While Jamie was certain that he’d owned such a garment, he definitely hadn’t been wearing it when he’d entered the stadium. He always showed up already in his uniform, because he never left enough time for himself to change!

“Tell me your last name, TJ,” Jamie gruffly demanded, mentally surprising himself with just how forceful he was with his words. He was beginning to put things together in his mind, although his thoughts, feelings and memories continued to be a jumbled mess that stubbornly refused to sort themselves out. “Tell me your surname, TJ.” Jamie actually surprised himself with the forceful nature of his words. He wasn’t usually so dominant in his attitude - or was he? He couldn’t actually be sure any more. Everything was so foggy…

“It-it’s Butterington! Trent Jordan Butterington!” the other man exclaimed in a panic, confirming the odd suspicion that had begun blooming within Jamie’s mind. When he put work into it, he too could finally sum up his own surname and he was confident that it was Watt. Deep down though, Jamie knew that it wasn’t quite right. Butterington had been his surname, he had worked at the fast food stand in the stadium, he had been the one with a diminutive physique and a nervous disposition. Now all of those things belonged to TJ. Simply put, the two men hadn’t so much switched bodies as they had switched lives.

Jamie paused for a moment to really consider what this change-up meant for him. He had gone from being the only child of uncaring parents to one of three brothers in what appeared to be a tight-knit loving family. Not only that but his new upbringing and career had caused him to sculpt the kind of hard muscular body he had always secretly lusted over and wanted for himself! As he looked at it, there didn’t seem to be anything negative about the experience for him - although he supposed the same couldn’t be said for TJ, who had lost so much and gained very little in return.

Before either of them could even try and put into words what had happened to them, a third voice joined their conversation: “Oh, there you are, bro! I’ve been looking all over for you.” Jamie and TJ glanced over towards the source of the voice and both instantly recognised the short and stocky man as Derek Watt, the middle child of the Watt brothers and another member of the Pittsburgh Steelers roster. His sudden appearance sparked anxiety for Jamie and TJ, as neither of them seemed sure of who Derek was actually addressing with his remarks until he came up and slapped Jamie on the shoulder. “You’ve been on this team longer than me, dude. How are you still getting lost?”

“I… don’t know,” Jamie replied through nervous chuckles. He’d never actually had a brother before, nor many close male friends, so he was somewhat uncertain about how he was supposed to act in front of Derek. Thankfully the other man didn’t seem too perturbed, although he did flash a questioning glance Jamie’s way before turning his attention on the other individual present - TJ, his real brother. Not that he seemed to know of it, of course.

“This is a players-only area,” Derek remarked disapprovingly, “You shouldn’t be back here… TJ.” The pause had been for Derek to check the name badge on the smaller man’s uniform, and there wasn’t a hint of recognition as he’d said it either. Jamie felt equal parts fascinated and guilty as he regarded the exchange, especially due to how TJ’s eyes darted between them in manic fashion before he bowed his head, mumbled an apology and scurried away. Jamie wanted to call out to the other and reassure him that they would meet up later to discuss whatever the hell had just happened to him, but he knew that it wouldn’t be a wise decision with his brother right there. The less suspicious Derek was of him, the better!

With the non-Watt element removed from the conversation, Jamie was now free to follow Derek on the correct path towards the locker room. He remained quiet, choosing to listen to his brother talking about how life at home with his wife and kids was. Strangely, Jamie could actually remember visiting Derek and his wife and playing around with their beautiful children, but he was also aware of the fact that they were actually TJ’s memories and not his own. He didn’t have any nieces or nephews… and yet, when he thought about them, there was a familial love blossoming in his heart as if he really was their uncle.

Once they were in the locker room, Jamie was greeted by several more of his new teammates, all of whom seemed pretty hyped for him to break the team’s sack record for a single season. Although he felt guilty of potentially robbing TJ of such a momentous achievement, the more praise he received from his peers, the less time Jamie spent even thinking about the other. It was becoming increasingly more difficult to do anything other than live in the moment and considering he was about to play his first ever game of professional football, it seemed like indulging in his new life was the most sensible route for him to take. He was supposed to be a seasoned pro and the Steelers fans were expecting him to dominate their rival team’s offense. He wasn’t about to let them down!

As he quietly got dressed up in his black-and-yellow uniform, his new brother approached him again. “Are you sure you’re okay, dude? You’re being super quiet and you were kinda spaced out back there in that corridor,” Derek asked, his voice laced with concern. “Did you hit your head or something?”

“Uh yeah, I did actually,” Jamie confessed, “Headbutted that skinny kid by accident when he rounded the corner too fast.” He chuckled lightly and shook his head, trying to play it off as if it was all no big deal. Once again he felt a pang of guilt at referring to TJ as a ‘skinny kid’, but he supposed that it was accurate under their current circumstances while they were in their life-swapped states.

“Dude, you could be concussed! We need to get the team doctor to check you out,” the middle Watt brother remarked, a hint of irritation mixing with his previously displayed concern. “That damn kid,” he added in a mutter, “If he did concuss you… he should be out of a job.”

“I’m not concussed!” Jamie exclaimed without even a moment’s hesitation. The absolute last thing he needed at that moment was to get quizzed by a doctor, because he wasn’t sure he’d be able to sufficiently answer the questions that he might be asked. It wasn’t exactly an understatement to call his brain a battlefield at that moment - he was struggling to identify which memories and thoughts belonged to Jamie Butterington, and which belonged to Jamie Watt. “Seriously bro, I’m fine. Not even a headache, trust me. I was just getting into the zone… it’s a big game tonight. Defense needs me in top form.”

Derek continued to hold his gaze for several more moments, silently weighing up how much he trusted his younger brother’s judgment, before finally relenting. “You’re right. You better kick ass out there,” he advised Jamie, slapping him on the shoulder once more. “But I’m keeping an eye on you, bro. You know JJ will tear me a new one if I let you get hurt on my watch!”

At the mention of their older brother, Jamie was suddenly distracted by a flood of memories all featuring JJ and once again he was reminded just how nice it was to belong to a caring family. Even if he and his brothers gave each other shit and competed over every little thing, it was all in the name of fun. Jamie no longer had to feel unwanted in his own family; if anything, as the youngest of the three, he was secretly their parents’ favorite!

Focus up, he instructed himself as Derek finally walked away. You can think about the craziness of this situation and the morality of how much you’re enjoying it once the game is over. These guys are counting on you! Keeping that in mind, Jamie jumped up from his chair and started towards the door that led out to the pitch. It was time to put all the distractions aside and get in some warm-up reps because it wouldn’t be long until he had his helmet on and the game was starting…

Elsewhere in the arena, TJ Butterington was having a terrible afternoon. He had been chewed out by his manager after finally arriving at the fast food stall and the threat of being fired continued to loom over him like a dark cloud. By the time he reached his designated concession stand, TJ barely had enough time to load up his register before the arena’s gates opened and the massive crowd of Steelers fans began to roll in. From that moment on, he didn’t get a single moment of peace as the fury of impatient customers hit him like a freight train. The next several hours flew by for TJ, but every passing minute was torture as he was subjected to name-calling from both the people he was serving (many of whom were already drunk) and his overbearing manager.

It was during a brief lull of customers that TJ finally got to listen in to the commentary playing over the loudspeakers in the foyer, but what he heard came as a punch to the gut. “How good is number ninety?!” the commentator exclaimed, “That’s Watt with his fifth sack of the day!” In order to survive the chaos he had endured during the first part of his shift, TJ had clung onto the (admittedly rather wild) thought that this wasn’t really his life - that he was supposed to be the star football player, not Jamie. That should be me! He had a crazy theory that when they had collided, their realities had somehow been switched, and he hoped that he would be able to convince the other of such.

Troublingly though, it was getting more and more difficult for TJ to remember his life as a Watt. He could no longer remember his parents’ names nor where he went to college. Instead those parts of his brain were filled with memories of his life as a Butterington and they were becoming more prominent as his shift progressed. By the time the game (and thus his shift) was over, TJ had almost completely forgotten about his theory until he heard the name “Jamie Watt” being spoken over the loudspeakers. Startled back into realization, he quickly took off from the stall and hurried into the stadium’s staff only area. Ignoring the staff worker who snapped at him that he wasn’t supposed to be there, TJ did his best to navigate the maze of unfamiliar corridors until he finally found himself in the vicinity of the locker room. As he approached, the door opened and Jamie stepped out, still sweaty from his MVP-worthy performance in the game.

“Hey, we really need to talk!” TJ hissed as he rushed up to the other and grabbed him by the forearm. Upon gripping onto the man’s thick arm with his dainty hand, TJ was suddenly struck by just how small and weak he was now when compared to the other man - he didn’t like it one bit! “When we hit heads, we switched bodies or lives or something. The specifics don’t really matter but what does is that I’m starting to forget my life before it… is the same happening to you?”

TJ waited with baited breath for the response as confusion flashed across Jamie’s face. But to his horror, that confusion shifted into annoyance as Jamie swiftly pulled his arm out of TJ’s weak grip. “I don’t know what the fuck you’re talking about,” he grunted, glaring down at the man that he now towered over, “And I’m pretty sure you’re not supposed to be back here. What are you, some kinda stalker?” Although TJ had been on the receiving end of countless hurtful words throughout his shift at the fast food stall, these ones were definitely the most damaging. “Get the fuck outta here, dude, before I call security.”

He doesn’t remember anything! TJ’s heart dropped like a stone and tears began to spring into his eyes as he considered what that meant: it was only a matter of time before he completely forgot his previous life too. He’d be trapped as a total loser! “P-please-- Mr Watt--” he began weakly, only to break off when the locker room door opened again and Derek exited. Recognising how hopeless his situation was, TJ quickly staggered back and scurried away while fighting the urge to cry.

Jamie watched the strange-behaving fan hurry away and felt nothing but confused. The kid had been talking complete nonsense! Did he honestly expect Jamie to buy into the idea that they had switched lives when they bumped heads? Dude definitely needs a whole lot of therapy! What a whackjob.

When Derek arrived at his side and asked if Jamie wanted to report what had just happened, the youngest Watt brother just chuckled and shook his head. “Nah, he’s not worth the time or energy,” he replied dismissively, already pushing the strange encounter to the back of his mind. Instead, he threw an arm around his brother’s broad shoulders and began to steer him towards the exit. “Come on, bro, let’s go have ourselves a celebration!”

The two men had quite the different experience when they arrived at their new homes: Jamie at the mini-mansion he shared with his beautiful fiancée and TJ at the rundown shack that the Butterington family rented. The whole Watt clan, including TJ and Derek’s older brother JJ and their parents, had hastily set up a post-game party to celebrate Jamie’s career best performance and for the next few hours Jamie received constant reminders from various members of his family just how proud they were of him. Even Derek and JJ kept their teasing to a minimum, although he couldn’t escape the brotherly ribs entirely, and the trio engaged in a brief bit of playful wrestling out in the yard while their respective wives and girlfriends rolled their eyes and dismissed the whole thing as “boys being boys”.

Meanwhile, over at the Butterington home, TJ found himself getting confronted by his mother as soon as he stepped through the door, who was demanding for his next month’s rent in advance. Bitter by the events of the afternoon and still possessing a few remaining shreds of his former confidence, TJ stood his ground and refused. As expected, threats of being thrown out onto the street followed but he did his best not to rise to the obvious bait. Instead, after retreating to his basement bedroom (which was adorned with various Steelers merchandise, including a jersey for #90: Jamie Watt), TJ pulled out his phone and began looking up local rooms to rent. If he was forced to live this unrewarding life for the foreseeable future then at the very least he deserved to escape from his hellish new family…