Pokemon Jordinio Version - Chapter 21.2 (Patreon)

A few days on the road quickly passed after meeting Gary. Despite what the games would have you believing, Vermillion City really was not anywhere close to Cerulean City.

I would have been quicker heading to Saffron City or Lavender Town. But Lavender Town did not have a gym as far as I know, and fuck going to Saffron City.

Sure, it apparently has two gyms according to what little I can find, a fighting type gym and a psychic type gym. But, the second one was the real problem.

And fuck going anywhere near that place until I either have an army of dark types, or Ash fucks up Sabrina.

The few days that have passed since meeting mister smell you later though, have been interesting.

Because for some reason, the guy keeps texting me.

I paused mid-sip of my lovely vanilla protein shake, now that I'm a millionaire, I can eat whatever the fuck I want after all.
The reason why I paused mid-sip, being the alert sound my phone gave off to signify a text.

Or rather, the short, sweet and crisp catchy tune I'd long replaced my alert sound with.

'You were thinkin' I died, bitch, surprise! I still got them double thick thighs-'

Since it was just a text and not a call, it only went through basically the first verse unlike my ring tone, but hey, still ear catching.

I reached into my pocket and pulled out my phone and opened up my texts. It was a picture of Gary, a fishing rod in hand with an unconscious Seadra dangling from the line.

-Just Caught A Seadra!- The caption on top read.

Then a split moment later, my phone vibrated as another message came through. Another picture.

-Now It's A Kingdra! Pay2Win Bitch!-

I rolled my eyes and snorted at the second picture. It was of Gary standing beside a pokemon floating in the air beside him, like Seadra it was a blue sea horse like pokemon, but this one was much larger, and in one hand, Gary held a up a bunch of TM discs between his teen fingers, as if they were weapons, hell his arms were crossed up over his chest pointing into the air, the fucker was outright dabbing at me in the picture.

He must have caught the Seadra a little while ago, loaded it up with TM's and then evolved it using a Dragon Scale, then probably loaded it up with some more.

Evolution in a lot of ways multiplied the original strength of the pokemon that evolved, so some quick boosts from TM's before evolving it would have been the smart play and what I would have done.

Huffing, I quickly replied, 'A whole lot of bragging for a guy who skipped going to Vermillion City after I whooped his ass to go for an easier gym, bet you don't have the stones to go after Sabrina.'

It was Gary who had informed me about the fighting gym in Saffron City being an actual thing and that there were a whole lot of gyms in Kanto beyond the main eight, it was only that the main eight were generally the stronger ones.

Sans Pewter City for the most part. Brock apparently had potential, but he had the responsibility foisted on him too quick and hadn't grown into himself yet, his father was the original gym leader.

And from what I did actually find of Flint on on the league website, I was actually really lucky to catch Brock instead of him. A shit head failure of a father or not, his known pokemon when he was the active gym leader was stacked.

Golem, Rhydon, Onix, Magcargo, Lunatone, Barbaracle.

And that was his old team, his profile hadn't been updated since he returned to taking over for Brock. So who knows what shit he has now, he probably has a Rhyperior at least.

But yeah, apparently, my kicking Gary's ass was enough for him to decide to not go to Vermillion and take on Surge and instead go after the weaker fighting type gym in Saffron.

He wanted to get stronger before taking on the main gyms. Which is funny, because you won't see anyone with a Kingdra playing through the games deciding they need to wait before taking on gyms.

My phone vibrated again as Gary replied, 'Heh, I'll smell your salty tears from all the way over here once you go get your shit put in by Surge, he's on a whole other level from Brock and those slutty sisters in Cerulean.'

Hey now, that was rude. Only one of them was a slut. I actually quite liked Lily, she was pretty cool in our battle and pretty tough.

'Again, tough talk for somebody who didn't bother battling those sisters.' I replied.

From what he'd told me over the past few days, the only one of the main eight gyms Gary had went after, was the Pewter one and only because of the leader being Brock and not Flint.

When the only reply he sent was an emoji of a middle finger being stuck up, I smirked and put my phone back in my pocket.

And immediately lost my smirk and sighed.

Flint wasn't the only leader I'd looked into lately. I'd checked the profile for Surge just the other day. If Flint's team was kind of stacked, then Surge's was the full on whooty booty of electric squads.

On top of that, Surge had way more than just six pokemon. He had a few that stood out above the rest, but he had dozens of pokemon. Dozens of Voltorb, Pikachu, Magnemite and shit.

But the main ones that stood out above the rest?

Raichu, Alolan Golem, Ampharos, Electrode, Magnezone, Manectric, Jolteon, Laturn and fucking Electivire of all things.
I already had a rough idea of who I was gonna pick for the battle. The most definite being Pidgeotto. We've been working hard since I taught Clefable Thunderbolt to steal that technique for grounding electricity using steel type attacks that Winona used in the anime and we've made amazing progress.

Surge from what I saw, favoured three formats of battles. One on ones, two on two's and three on three's. Mostly, he went with one on ones and two on twos. As far as gym leaders went, he had by far the most wins against challengers. From what I could see, he a lot of the time had multiple one on ones per day, most of them being left up to his Raichu who toasted pretty much all challengers.

I'm banking on a one one one. But, if it's two on two, then I want to use Graveler. And if it's a three on three, I'll use Shiftry as well.

But first, I wanted to evolve Graveler to make sure I secured my win. The problem being, I was having trouble doing that.
Sighing, I leaned back where I was sitting against a tree and took a gulp of my protein shake.

I had no idea how to go about trade evolving pokemon. It wasn't like Graveler was an Onix, which then only had to have a metal coat used on it to evolve. He was a legit trade evolution pokemon, no item required.

…And no matter how much I looked into things, there wasn't anything about pokemon evolving through trades anywhere on the internet or in the pokedex.

The most I could find at all, was a reference that Kadabra needed a massive build up of energy to facilitate its evolution into Alakzam. But, that still left me completely blank on going about it. Was it an outside source of energy needed, a build up over time of accumulation or training, or just pure strength gain?

I probably wouldn't worry over it quite as much right now, if it wasn't Surge. It didn't matter what adaption it was. Game, manga or anime. Surge was a cunt. A cocky, mocking punk ass cunt.

Losing at anything to guys like that, was the worst. All of my opponents can tell you that from experience.

"What's got you so down in the dumps?" Hilda asked as she finished up packing away her tent finally.

As always she was up much later than me. So until she was ready to go, I've just been doping myself up on sweet sweet protein for my lovely sweetheart Chansey to use later.

You see, my protein shake is not just protein powder and milk. Nor even is it just protein powder and moomoo milk. Mixed in, is a product only one such as I have access to.

A Chansey Egg. Not the reproductive kind, nasty, but rather, once a day Chansey produces an egg in her pouch, full of amazing vitamins and heaped full of vitality in actual energy form or something to that degree.

Do you know what that means? Let me simplify it in a simple mathematic equation.

Protein Powder + Momoo Milk, the best and healthiest milk I've ever come across + Chansey Egg = These muscles are full of win.

I only really came across the benefits of Chansey's eggs just after leaving Cerulean when I topped up on the good shit like Moomoo Milk. But even in that time span, I've noticed my gains are even greater than ever, my muscles are the muscles that will make even Machamp weep in envy.

And even better. I've grown. I mean, that is obvious going by the age of this body and all. But, I've grown too much. A whole two inches since I started this journey already. That probably doesn't sound like a lot, but I was already five-one when I arrived here in this younger body, now I'm five-three.

Now, let me tell you my friends. I hit my max height by fifteen, it was just a bit under five-six. I was a manlet by every definition of the word, a proud awesome manley with a big honkin' cock, but a manlet nonetheless.

If this keeps up, I'll shoot right by my original full height. And, it's all thanks to Chansey. For you see, not only is her egg so amazing, so is she. When using heal pulse on the body, she can actively use the nutrients and shit in the body to stimulate the body as well.

Well, to simplify it for the dumb fucks. It means I'm gonna be a juggernaut baby.

With a big honkin' cock.

Clefable may have Heal Pulse, but she can't do shit like that. The Chansey line are pretty special when it comes to healing, and I love her more and more each day.

"Trying to think on how to evolve Graveler," I put all that out of mind for the moment and replied to Hilda with a shrug, "The most I can figure out is he needs some massive store of energy to trigger the evolution or something like that, but I've no idea how to go about that."

"Oh?" Hilda tilted her head, before her eyes widened briefly and she laughed, "Oh! That's right, you never went to a normal school never mind a trainer school right?"

"…The hell has that got to do with anything?" I gaped at her. Did she just randomly want to make fun of a poor kid that never went to school?

I mean, it's a lie, but wow, brutal. I didn't know she had it in her. What's next, is she gonna make fun of mentally retarded people?

"Heck," she shook the cable in her hand, "It was this exact thing I used for it."

Huh. I don't think Hilda would lie to me about this….but at the same time. It sounds so stupid. Like, at face value, I kind of get it.

…But it's a fucking cable cord man.

Then again, in some cases, people and pokemon have been able to share energy and shit without even that much really. Like Z-moves and Mega Evolution. At least a cable directly connects the two.

But still, a cable man.

Well, whatever. "I'm just not gonna bother questioning the stupidity of it all," I shrugged and stood up, "So how do we do this?" I asked.

"Just send out Graveler and another pokemon and have them hold on to both ends of the wires, the pokemon transferring the energy should hold on to this end though." Hilda explained and held out the cable to me, showing one end that had a little arrow pointing inwards through the cable towards the other end in bold red.

"And if it isn't enough?" I asked.

"Then switch to another pokemon," Hilda shrugged again, "You're not just limited to one pokemon y'know?"

Huh. Well, alright then. I reached for my belt and grabbed two pokeballs, quickly bringing out Graveler and Pidgeotto. there's no doubt after all, that Pidgeotto is my strongest pokemon as of right now.

A little bit of explanation and minutes later, and I bore witness to perhaps the stupidest thing I've seen since I got here.
And I've met a ginger scrub called Cross.

The sight? Graveler and Pidgeotto standing at opposite sides, each holding an end of a cable in their mouths.

Stupid, oh so stupid, it was really so so damn stupid and cringe looking. I could lose cool and manly points for th-
My internal cringe was cut off by Graveler erupting into familiar bright light and beginning to change shape.

Cringe, oh so cringe. But Arceus fucking damnit. It actually worked.

And mere moments later, my Graveler, became a badass sturdy Golem.