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EARLY ACCES - What Counts As Cheating? (Patreon)

Published:
2021-05-24 15:01:02
Edited:
2021-05-25 09:45:02
Imported:
2022-05

Content

*edit: patchwork edit job to fix those incorrect %!! Thanks for spotting!

Here's the video all about cheating with lots of audience submissions! Really loved putting this video together and exploring this topic. Really keen to continue this conversation in the comments/discord server!

Hannah x

Files

What Counts as Cheating?

What IS cheating? When I was a teenager, I thought there was a very clear line between cheating and not cheating but is it really that black and white OR is it all about context and personal boundaries? 🤔💔 I'd love to know what you think in the comments, especially around different cultural customs and norms. MENTIONED IN VIDEO Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/hannahwitton TIMESTAMPS 00:00 – Intro 01:53 – What Is Cheating 08:21 – Is It Cheating If… 16:29 – Figuring Out Our Personal Boundaries 22:03 – The Impact of Technology on Infidelity 23:52 – Fidelity Agreements: It’s All in the Details PEOPLE INVOLVED Camilla: https://www.instagram.com/cccasimira/ Savannah: https://www.instagram.com/saffie961/ Mansa: https://www.instagram.com/mansawoodandoh/ Chloe: https://www.instagram.com/endowaddles/ Jo Eliza: https://www.instagram.com/disabled_eliza/ Hannah Eve Amélie Birdy: https://www.instagram.com/bodykindbirdy/ Emily Elouise: https://www.instagram.com/wellness_with_el/ Kira Bre Molly Bob: https://www.instagram.com/bobbinsleak/ Bronwen Matthew Eloise Tracy: https://www.instagram.com/breakthatmould/ Matthew: https://www.instagram.com/mattlikethepaint/ Jess Isobel: https://www.instagram.com/isobelwhy/ SIMILAR VIDEOS Sex Survey 2021 Results! 💕 Pandemic Edition: https://youtu.be/clE2aO5t67Y 6 Myths About Monogamy That Are Ruining Our Relationships: https://youtu.be/w5_Qzzq14LA Sex on the Wedding Night?: https://youtu.be/sRTxO2fT7Tw 💥MY CULTURE, LIFESTYLE & CAREER YOUTUBE CHANNEL💥 Subscribe: https://www.youtube.com/morehannah?sub_confirmation=1 ✨WANT TO SUPPORT ME AND MY WORK?✨ Join The Common Room on Patreon! http://www.patreon.com/hannahwitton 📚MY BOOKS*📚 The Hormone Diaries: http://bit.ly/TheHormoneDiariesBook Doing It: http://bit.ly/DoingItBook Want to be the first to know about new projects & exclusive content? 📝SIGN UP TO MY NEWSLETTER📝 http://bit.ly/HannahWittonsNewsletter 🌻LET’S CONNECT🌻 Instagram: http://instagram.com/hannahwitton Twitter: https://twitter.com/hannahwitton Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/hannahwittonofficial 🎧LISTEN TO MY PODCAST🎧 https://pod.link/1464870183 💕JOIN THE HORMONE DIARIES COMMUNITY 💕 https://www.facebook.com/groups/451313315614742/ 💛MY WEBSITE💛 https://hannahwitton.com/ 🎮WATCH ME PLAY GAMES🎮 https://www.twitch.tv/hannahwitton ⭐CAPTIONS BY REV*⭐ https://www.rev.com/services?ref=hannahwitton 🎶MUSIC FOR YOUTUBE VIDEOS* 🎶 http://share.epidemicsound.com/hannah 🎥VIDEO EQUIPMENT*🎥 Main camera - Canon 80d: http://bit.ly/HannahsMainCamera Lens - Sigma 18-35mm f1.8: http://bit.ly/HannahsLens Microphone - H4n Zoom: http://bit.ly/HannahsMicrophone Vlog camera - Sony Sony ZV-1: https://bit.ly/HannahsNewVlogCamera Twitch camera - http://bit.ly/HannahsTwitchCamera 🎙PODCAST EQUIPMENT*🎙 Microphone - Samson Q2U: http://bit.ly/HannahsPodcastMicrophone Recorder - H6n Zoom: http://bit.ly/HannahsPodcastRecorder *Affiliate links #HannahWitton

Comments

Anonymous

Hey Hannah - at 8m48s in, what you say as the result of the first Insta poll is very different (completely opposite) to what your graphics say. Just FYI!

Anonymous

The only problem I had with the poll was that basically nothing is cheating to me as a Polyam person, but the key is hiding/lying and that distinction wasn't made 😊

Eric Leslie

Seeing the "does technology make things any different?" question right there in the intro made me very happy. I thought years ago now that "PolyTech: How Technology Makes Romance Easier, and Monogamy Harder, Than Ever Before" would be a good book title. Free to whoever wants it, since I'm apparently not going to write it. (I guess I don't know whether that pun crosses the ocean, but at least in the states 'polytech' is a common shortening of polytechnic, a type of higher learning institution, but also in this case polyamory tec--you get it.) The comment from the person who realized they were okay with anonymized (dehumanized) porn but not with Reddit / Onlyfans / "porn with autonomy" was fascinating, and a brave bit of insight to share. As it seems like almost everyone either started with or came around to, every relationship (between however many people) is going to have its own agreements, and how those agreements can be violated is going to be incredibly individual. I agree that the hypotheticals are a good way to try to sort out your personal boundaries, but obviously to have confidence that they're going to be followed by your partner(s), discussion and agreement is pretty critical. Though one of the authors of More Than Two has turned out to be... not great, I've always thought the Relationship Bill of Rights that came out of that book and website was a pretty great foundation to build from, whether a relationship is striving for monogamy or not - https://www.morethantwo.com/relationshipbillofrights.html - but beyond and around that, it will (and should) always be negotiation and hopefully happy consensus. Some want/will/won't lists might be a useful tool.

Eric Leslie

Gosh, didn't realize that comment had gotten so long until I hit post. Sorry. :P

Hannah Witton
>>60474342

why do I always miss these things??? 😂 someone flagged it to me in the discord server, unfortunately my editor is away without her computer/laptop so trying to work on something but we shall see

Anonymous

I would like to say thank you for using my video x

Hannah Witton
>>60476042

ugh yeah I really want to read that book but feel weird about it because of all the recent stuff that's come out about the author

Eric Leslie
>>60476042

Can't blame you at all. Frankly I just pretend all the stuff I think is good was written by Eve. 😛 Which is, I recognize, not a great take. The better take is probably just to say, read Eve's words on it - https://brighterthansunflowers.com/2019/09/02/thoughts-on-the-fifth-anniversary-of-more-than-two/ - and then *also* the 'survivor pod' thoughts on it she references - https://fv-survivors.medium.com/about-more-than-two-ffdad46e100 - and then read it with all that in your brain, if you can. I still do think the Relationship Bill of Rights is a really pretty good little treatise. But there's no denying the rest of its context is messy.

Hannah Witton
>>60476042

oooh thanks for sharing those! I also really love the map illustration that I think the author of more than two created with lots of different relationship styles but I can't bring myself to buy a copy because I don't want to financially support him!

Eric Leslie
>>60476042

Totally understand that. 2nd hand copy or a library, maybe. FWIW, Eve does lay out in that update linked above that she and Franklin both get about $1 in royalties from every copy sold, and the rest of the proceeds all go to Thorntree Press, which she now owns in entirety. So *almost* all of the money would go to her, not him (and all of it from any other books coming from Thorntree that he didn't write, as he no longer has any Thorntree ownership). So that's good, at least.