A Thank You, and A Personal Story (Patreon)

Hey Guys and Gals,

First of all, I want to thank you from the very bottom of my heart for your support. I’m writing this to the $5/month tier and above, because it’s here that I see our community really thriving, really taking off, really sticking together and fighting for the ideals of reason, knowledge, fairness, and freedom of thought and expression.

I also want to tell you a story, to give you a little insight into something strange that’s been happening to me over the last six months or so, and how I think that brought all of us here, together. I’ve not told anyone this story apart from Erin, and while I don’t think it’s revolutionary, perhaps it’s just a tad bit revelatory. Either way, I want you to know.

12:34. Nearly every day -- sometimes twice -- I’d look at a nearby clock or my phone, and it’d be 12:34. At first, it was just strange. A coincidence that, because of those sequence of numbers, I simply noticed offhandedly. But then I kept seeing it. 12:34. Constantly. It became eerie. I never intentionally looked at a clock in order to see it. I just kept looking at clocks when it was 12:34. This went on for months on end.

The night I Tweeted the infamous joke on Twitter, I was laying in bed. I looked across the dark room at the clock sitting next to my PS4, and -- you guessed it -- it was 12:34. Except, suddenly, this sequence of numbers seemed to have real meaning. Something fell into place in my head, and everything made sense. I felt like it was telling me to go back to the beginning, to start from an embryonic state, and to move forward in sequence. 1, 2, 3, 4…

Now, I didn’t feel so unsettled by the weirdness of seeing this time emblazoned on a clock over and over again. I felt like this was a message. I’m an atheist, and I don’t believe very much (or at all) in spiritual machinations of the universe. Whether this was mere serendipity, coincidence, or a message, I took it as the latter, beliefs be damned. It was then and there I decided that not only would I likely resign my post at Kinda Funny, but that I would go back to the beginning, figure out what truly makes me happy, and put one foot after the other. Nothing out of order. Nothing out of sequence. 1, then 2, then 3, then 4, just like the clock had been telling me for God knows how many months.

It was at that point that I acknowledged what had been gnawing at me for a long time: That I wasn’t happy doing what I was doing, that I needed to rediscover who I was, and, perhaps more importantly, what made me who I was. And that was an undying love for history and politics, and the stories swirling around in that space. I didn’t know how to get to where I was going -- that would come later, with the help of family and close friends (some of them new) -- but I knew that I needed to walk back to 1, start again, and walk towards 2.

The joke was the impetus for my resignation, but there’s a lot more to the story than that. Much of it I told on my second Rubin Report appearance. But I’m so glad I told that joke, I’m so glad I saw the symbolism in these random numbers -- even if there was no symbolism there at all -- and I’m so glad I made the choice I did. Today, it’s all about rediscovering the sequence that will make me happy. And I think, in turn, I can make all of you happy, too, even if only for 20 or 30 minutes a week, with a couple of new videos that will hopefully provoke thought and inspire your brain. Not to mention what I hope will be many fruitful hours here on Patreon interacting with all of you.

Your support has been overwhelming, far beyond even my wildest expectations. But my vision remains intact: Two videos a week, written, researched, and edited by yours truly, on a diverse array of subjects under those two beloved aforementioned banners. And my vision goes beyond that, because I mean what I say when I say that I want this community to not only thrive off of my contributions, but each others’, too.

Let’s have some fun together over the months and years ahead. Keep that feedback coming, feel free to increase or decrease your patronage as you see fit or as the real world demands, and, above all else, enjoy the content that’ll be coming your way beginning in April. In the meantime, you’ll find me here most days, interacting with you generous and giving souls the very best I can. What you’ve done for me means the absolute world to me, and I have no intention whatsoever of letting you down.

Here’s to the future. And here’s to getting there one step at a time. 1, 2, 3, 4…

Your friend, -Colin