Laughing Matters (Yandere Clowns x Child Reader) (Patreon)

((Y/N)'s POV) Age: 6

Today was like any other boring day on this boring form in the middle of where with only chores, the big field with patches of grass for the crops and stuff to be placed for some of the trees, and the rest was crop fields and dirt. We had nothing to really do around here unless you count the video games I have inside, but even then nobody plays with me and we don't get that much internet out here. I'm only out here with my mommy and daddy and they only want to farm and sell what we grow to business people. Nobody else ever comes out here. I was out doing my share of chores like feeding the piggies, chickens, cows, and horses, and taking out the trash in the house.

(Y/N)'s mind-When is something fun and new going to happen around here?

I finished my chores and was about to go inside to play some games, but then I heard something like tires screeching and a small horn beeping from very far away. I looked to see a cloud of dirt being kicked up off the dirt road but didn't see the car that much.

(Y/N)-Daddy! We got another buyer!... Daddy!

I didn't think he could hear me, so I went to the barn and saw that he was listening to music while chopping some wood. I got to where he could see me and he pulled out his ar buds.

Daddy-What?

(Y/N)-More buyers.

Daddy-What? We don't have anyone coming today.

(Y/N)-Well, a car is coming and nobody really comes out here.

I followed him back out to the front of the farm road, but there was only a small car that didn't look bigger than those toy cars at the grocery store I ride in sometimes. I looked at my Daddy and he looked at the tracks to find bigger tire tracks or something, but there were none.

Daddy-Is this a remote control car?

(Y/N)-Can I get one like this?!

Just then the doors opened on both sides and that's when a couple of clown ladies came out to stretch.

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I had no idea what was going on and Daddy looked very confused too before the clown with purple hair walked up to him and put her arms behind her back.

???-Excuse me, sir. My friends and I seem to be a little lost and our car is having some troubles.

Daddy-Um... You all fit in that tiny car?

???-Uh-huh... Oh, where are my manners? My name is Jackie, and these are my friends. Our balloon girl is Lilly.

Lilly-Care for a balloon animal?!

She took out a balloon to blow it up and quickly made... a tiger with 10 other balloons. I had no idea how she did that, but color me impressed.

Jackie-These are the sisters, Koko and Vivi. Koko has pink hair and Summer has blue hair.

Just then they saw me and they locked arms to scoop me up this way. I was now stuck in between a big hug after being launched in the air a little.

Koko-Vivi, look how cute and small he is! ~

Vivi-Oh my god, I was thinking the same thing! ~

Koko/Vivi-AAAAAHHHHHHHH!!! ~

Jackie-Finally, we have Jasmine.

Daddy-Well... If you all need some help, I can look up a tow truck company to come out here. I don't have any car parts for... a car that small.

Jasmine-Oh really... You might want to check under the hood.

Daddy went to open the hood of the small car, but when he did a pie sprung out and hit him in the face. The girls laughed and I did too because it was funny.

(Timeskip 30 Minutes)

The girls were downstairs with me while I played a game in my room. Daddy said he was going to call a tow truck place to take the car, but I don't know how that's going. Suddenly, my door opened and Mommy came in, so I paused the game.

Mommy-Sweetie, where did you meet those girls?

(Y/N)-Nowhere. Daddy and I checked on the car and they all came out of that tiny car, like in the circus.

Mommy-Well... Daddy said they would stay here a while since the tow truck people had 75 people ahead of them.

I was surprised how many people needed a tow truck right now. I wonder why.

(Y/N)-So, where are they staying? In the living room?

Mommy-We don't know, yet, but they are a... wild bunch. We have a job for you. You just need to have fun and be a friend to them. Just where we can keep an eye on you and them.

I thought about what she said it sounded like she was going to have them stay in my room or something, but when I asked her this, she just pointed out the window. I went outside and saw that a big tent was put up.

Mommy-They asked if you wanted to go in and see the inside and play.

(Y/N)-...

(Timeskip 10 Minutes)

(Jackie's POV)

The girls and I were having so much fun with our new friend and he was so cute and playful! He loved our jokes and acts, and he loved the pies I make. I have chocolate and cream, coconut cream, banana cream, and pure whipped cream pie. Koko and Vivi were doing shadow puppets for him and he was speechless when they both worked together to make a realistic person.

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(Y/N)-How are you doing that?!

Vivi-A secret!

Koko-Magic!

Vivi-Koko!

Just then Jasmine peered over my shoulder and gave (Y/N) a little music bax she made and it showed her dancing with him to a song we had from his little Sonic game.

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(Y/N)-You made this?

Jasmine-I also handle putting up the tent, making funhouse, machines, and not to brag, but I do it all 'super' fast.

The look on his face was so adorable, but it soon became better when I tickled his sides to make him laugh. Jasmine held up his arms to make him completely defenseless against my tickle attack and Koko and Vivi came over to enjoy the show themselves.

(No POV)

(Y/N) was having so much fun with his 'new friends' that he didn't notice that the balloon clown Lilly was not there... Meanwhile, at the autobody shop, the whole mess of cars just kept on piling up for the mechanics Breaklines were cut to cause crashes, but this those cars they found something in the engines that were smashed to pieces, but one of them came intact.

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Mechanic#1-What the fuck?

Mechanic#2-A wind-up toy?

One of them wound it up a little, but when there was a big click they let it go and it suddenly jumped and bit one of the mechanics' fingers clean off.

Mechanic#1-AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!

Mechanic#2-OH MY GOD!!! I-I'M GETTING THE FIRST AID AND CALLING AN AMBULANCE!!!

Lilly-Oh noooo, you dooo-ooooon't. ~

They both turned to see Lilly and all of the broken cars outside were slowly floating away with balloons tied to them that were not very big, but 7 on each car was enough for some reason.

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Lilly-Hahahaha! Hiya! ~

Lilly put her thumb in her mouth and blew really hard on it. Both mechanics stood in awe as her body got bigger. There were speechless and frozen in shock.

Lilly-My name is Lilly and we're going to have 'so much fun'! ~

She playfully jogged in a silly way over to them and showed that even the taller mechanic with one finger missing only made it to her knees... She picked him up and tapped his nose a few time.

Lilly-We can't have you trying to fix our car later. No. No. No. *Giggles*... *Psst* It's not really broken, but that's a super duper secret. ~ *whisper*

Mechanic#1-...

Lilly-Oh well. You get to go bye-bye anyway. ~

She deeply kissed the mechanic for a bit and their body got more limp, the wound stopped bleeding, and when she started blowing into their mouth... They bloated up like a balloon and when she broke the kiss, her lips left a super sticky goo on their mouth. When she let them him, they started to float off in the air.

Lilly-Bye-bye!... Ok, your-! ~

She looked down and noticed the other mechanic was missing now.

Lilly--turn?

She looked at the shop before she blew out her mouth to shrink back down.

Lilly-Ohhhh, I love hide and seek! My baby boy will too! ~

(Mechanic's POV)

WHAT THE HELL JUST HAPPENED?!?!?! She blew my partner up like a balloon to float away! I hid in the shop and I had to get to the office where my phone was to call the police. I heard her humming and clown shoes skipping as she came in, so my body froze and I covered my mouth.

Lilly-Please come out! We were planning this for a month!... You don't want to make a cute baby boy, sad again, do you?!

She is completely insane. I crawled behind the tool sheds in here some more to hide while she made more balloons, tied them to things, and they lifted up slowly...

Mechanic's mind-WHAT KIND OF BALLOONS ARE THESE?!?!?!

Lilly-Really, you should see his bored and sad face... It's a kicked baby tiger. My friends and I have been new to this world for a few months now from leaving work and this parenting stuff sounds fun. We even get to help a sad boy from his boring life. Win-win! ~

She had more things floating and after 5 minutes...

Lilly-Oh, oh, plan B, for 'Big Hand'!

I had no idea what she meant by that, but she ran outside and I took this chance to run to the office and grab my phone. Just as I grabbed my phone, I saw a huge shadow of a hand outside before...

*SMASH*

(Timeskip 1 Hour)

(Lilly's POV)

Lilly-Owei! Owie! OWWWIIIEEEE!!!

My hand was back to normal size with my special helium out of it, but that dirty shop left splinted and fragments stuck inside. I got help from the girls when I got back and they let (Y/N) sit on my lap, but he asked how this happened to me. I had to say something and I will not be a bad mother and lie.

Lilly-*Sniffle* I-I was taking c-care of icky pests that wanted to hurt me, but when I could not find the last one  I SMACKED MY HAND DOWN TO GET IT AND THEN THIIIIISSSSS!!! *SOBBING*

Jackie gave me a tissue to blow my knows and when I did, it sounded like a car horn. No snot came out, so I used it to wipe my tears. (Y/N) was giving me hugs to make me feel better, so I hugged him tightly with one arm and my legs while the last thing was taken out of my hand. I got a bandage. (Y/N) got called back to his house and when he left, I cried some more on my bed in the tent, but Jackie came over to sit by my side.

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Jackie-Hey, turn that frown upside down because you did so well. ~

Lilly-... I want (Y/N) back... and my hand still hurts.  *hmph* *mumbles*

Jackie-Will it make you feel better if we take care of the rest while you play with (Y/N) tomorrow... He'll be all yours until the boring parents and truck drivers go bye-bye too. ~

Lilly-... 'Mostly' better.

Jackie-Coconut and chocolate cream pie for you!

She smashed a pie into my face and I started to lick it off while we all laughed. I ignored the pain I had now... I LOVE MY FAMILY!!!