Mo Dao Zu Shi rereading commentary || chapters 91-100 (Patreon)

Chapter 91: Longing (Part Two)

Wen Ning continued to peel the seed pods, sitting at the front of the boat.

BABY!!!! He's a corpse but he's still working on his fine motor skills for wangxian's sake!! T^T

Not only that, because nobody knew whom he was, Wei WuXian dared to do anything, no matter how shameless it was. Just the first night they went down the Cloud Recesses, and he was already the first to slink into Lan WangJi’s bed. Lan WangJi saw him rolling on his bed the moment he opened the door. Expressionless, he stood for a while before he went to the other room next door that he paid for. Wei WuXian, of course, wouldn’t let him go as easy as that. He chased after, yelling that he wanted to sleep with him. Even after he crawled into the bed, he tossed the other pillow out the window, insisting on using the same one as Lan WangJi. He even went as far as to ask why Lan WangJi was sleeping with clothes on, trying to forcefully strip him.

Halfway through the night, he had suddenly stretched his cold feet into Lan WangJi’s blanket, grabbing his hand and laying it on his chest, “Listen to my heartbeat, HanGuang-Jun!” And then he stared innocently yet romantically into his eyes… In the end, Lan WangJi struck him frozen. Unable to move, he finally quieted.

Holy fucking shit, Lan Wangji, the restraint and patience you have. Also you reap what you sow, Wei Ying, doing all that got just for the pranks got you falling for him for real! HAHA!

After the whole mind-this mind-that business, the owner promptly answered herself, stating, “One room, right? One room is enough! My rooms here are comfy even for two people. The bed won’t feel cramped.”

THE OWNER 100% IS A FANGIRL! SHE DID WHAT WAS RIGHT!

After this, he finally went back inside the room, pretending that nothing happened. He shut the door and sat down at the table. Lan WangJi’s hand reached over and pressed onto his veins. Although he knew it was only checking the condition of his body, as the two long fingers swam up his wrist, slowly rubbing, Wei WuXian’s other hand tightened up slightly underneath the table.

I don't blame you, Wei Wuxian, taking to fingers and rubbing them on the sensitive skin of a wrist IS kinda erotic, dunno why, but it is.

Chapter 92: Longing (Part Three)

Wei WuXian sighed within his heart, Never mind about these further investigations and whatnot… I’m more worried about if being cut-sleeve is contagious through sacrificing one’s body!

Oh my boy. My sweet, pure innocent boy. YOU WERE GAY FOR HIM IN YOUR FIRST LIFE TOO BUT YOU SEE IT ONLY NOW!

There was only one bed inside the room. If Lan WangJi was going to rest as well, he had to sleep on the same bed as him. Despite the number of times they’d slept on the same bed in the past couple of days, a lot of things had become delicate after Jiang Cheng’s words at the ancestral hall of Lotus Pier. Now, much less tell Lan WangJi to sleep on the same bed as him, he mulled things over for so long even when deciding how many rooms to take.

Lan WangJi, “There is no need.”

Wei WuXian somewhat propped up his body, “How could you do that? You’ve also been…” Just as he finished, he started to regret it. What if after he said so, Lan WangJi thought that with so much hassle,  it was best if they had two rooms? Wouldn’t it be more awkward?

I really love how Wei Wuxian is beginning to think more and more about what Lan Wangji thinks and how he himself should act. This is something that he NEVER did, especially towards Lan Wangji, so it really shows that he really wants him and is really afraid of losing him.

This is the difference between flirting and actually being in love. Even in his first life, Wei Wuxian was always the one flirting with girls so people thought he was very amorous and had lots of lovers, but in fact Wei Wuxian has never even kissed before, and that's because flirting doesn't equal loving someone. Yes, Wei Wuxian flirted unknowingly with Lan Wangji when he was young, but this time, he's really fallen for him, and he's really afraid of doing the wrong thing that will ruin the relations between them! It's such a beautiful development for this character!

Back when he was playing the madman, he said something like he could only sleep when he was beside Lan WangJi. Of course, all of that was nonsense. But ever since however long ago, the nonsense seemed to have become a reality. Wei WuXian thought, What should I do now? Don’t tell me from now on I really won’t be able to sleep in a bed that doesn’t have Lan Zhan in it?

Reap what you sow lolll

The owner had quite a good mouth. She grinned, “He’s handsome, you’re cute. It’s different, but both are pretty! Oh, right.” It was as though she recalled something, “If you’re here to visit, you can come check out the Guanyin Temple in our city.”

I told you, the owner is a fangirl. Check out how she used the classic seme and uke characteristics on them XDDD

After a few pokes, he somehow realized he’d never seen how Lan WangJi looked when he was smiling, and so he pinched the corners of Lan WangJi’s lips and pulled them upward, wanting to see his smiling face.

I reallllly have to draw this!

All of a sudden, he felt a small ache come from his finger. Lan WangJi had already opened his eyes. He was staring at him with cold eyes.

And one of Wei WuXian’s fingers was already caught within his mouth.

Oh....ohohoho......ohohohohoho!

Chapter 93: Longing (Part Four)

Being held back by the corner of his robe, he couldn’t roll any farther, rambling, “Lan Zhan, look at you. You poked a hole in the inn’s floor and sitting mat. You’re gonna have to pay…”

Before he even finished his sentence, he felt someone seize the back of his collar and drag him back. Wei WuXian’s back collided hard with the person’s chest. Lan WangJi’s low voice immediately thundered beside his ear, “Pay!”

Something so silly turns into something so sexy lol, pins his robe by the sword, holds him in place preventing him from escaping and them dragging him by the collar to be pressed against his chest lsdklsdkjf smooth move, drunk!Lan Zhan

He grabbed Wei WuXian’s hand and zipped out of their room like a gust of wind, rushing down the stairs. Befuddled, Wei WuXian was dragged down the main hall. On the first floor, the owner and her workers were eating around a long table. Lan WangJi didn’t spare them a single glance, focused on dragging Wei WuXian outside the doors.

The owner stood up, “What’s wrong? Young Masters, did the food not suit your taste?”

Wei WuXian managed to reply from amid the chaos, “It did! Especially the wine. It was strong indeed…” Before he finished his words, Lan WangJi had already dragged him out of the inn.

Hahahaha this is so chaotic and adorable <333

On the jujube tree, Lan WangJi struck like a tornado. Just a while later, and all of the jujubes on the tree had been completely picked off. Only after he put them all into his qiankun sleeve did he jump off the tree and open up his sleeve, showing Wei WuXian his ‘spoils of war’. Staring at all these round jujubes, Wei WuXian was at a complete loss as to what to say.

A moment later, he praised, “… They’re so big, there are so many, you’re so cool! Well done!”

The way Wei Wuxian praises him like a schoolgirl in love, and not at all like the cultivator who controls thousands of ghosts and corpses he is XDDDD

Chapter 94: Longing (Part Five)

He also grabbed the hen under Wei WuXian’s left arm, carrying one in each of his hands. Wei WuXian tugged the tail of his forehead ribbon and pulled him back, “You were just fine a second ago. Why are you mad again?”

Lan WangJi’s eyes swept over him, “Do not pull.”

From what it sounded like, his tone wasn’t too happy. It almost sounded like a warning. Wei WuXian couldn’t help but let go. Lan WangJi looked down and moved both of the two astonished hens to his left hand before he could use his right hand to straighten out his hair and forehead ribbon.

Wei WuXian thought, He never stopped no matter how I played with his forehead ribbon, in the past. Is he really mad today?

Sober Lan Wangji clearly lets Wei Wuxian touch his ribbon, yet now in this drunken state, he doesn't. Later, he also doesn't let him touch him. I wonder what's his state of mind is at this point

Hearing this, Lan WangJi turned his eyes downward. He only handed the hen back to him after a long while. Wei WuXian accepted it. He took out a jujube, wiped it on the cloth at his chest, and bit half of it away, thinking that  if Lan Zhan wanted to play, he should just play with him, “What do you want to do next?” He held himself back from saying, ‘Whose house do you want to destroy next?”

Lan WangJi frowned slightly, correcting him, “We.”

Wei WuXian, “Fine, fine, fine. We.”

LOLLLL this always cracks me up (and the audio drama did it so good too!) the way Lan Wangji insists that it's the both of them who want to play, because if not, then he's not playing! Wei Wuxian doesn't have a choice hahaha

Lan WangJi nodded and gave the jujubes back to him. Wei WuXian wiped another on his clothes and crunched down, thinking to himself that it’d be beyond terrifying if anyone knew that HanGuang-Jun wanted the YiLing Patriarch to do bad deeds with him in the middle of the night.

[...]

‘Lan WangJi of Gusu, Wei WuXian of Yunmeng, have been here!’ (what they wrote on the wall)

I also love this part a lot because this is Wei Wuxian referring to themselves as if they are characters in a superhero comic/film. One is the hero, the other is the villain.  This is what people think of them, and that there's a long history of enmity between them. When Wei Wuxian puts it like that it really does sound so ridiculous, but the most funny thing is that this is the truth! THIS is actually what Hanguang Jun and the Yiling Laozu are doing in reality - stealing chicken, ruining private properties and running around doing nonsense instead of fighting and hating each other hahaha

Wei WuXian went forth and looked. There were seven words—‘Lan WangJi of Gusu has been here’.

Wei WuXian, “…”

Holding a jujube in his mouth, he was shocked speechless.

I just imagine him in the middle of the bite, eyes wide open hahahaha so much drawing material!!

Lan WangJi seemed quite satisfied, finally taking Bichen back. After a moment of thought, he reached out again. This time, it wasn’t to write, but rather to draw. A few glares of the sword zipped across, and the small portrait of two kissing figures appeared on the wall. The precision of the lines and the obscenity of the content was enough to make Wei WuXian slap his own forehead.

Lan Zhan, do you know how much time it took me to master drawing scenes like this? And yet you, who don't even draw that much, did it with your sword on a wall! Your desperate yearning for Wei Wuxian is quite the Muse!

Watching how the content of his drawing became stranger and stranger, Wei WuXian felt sorry for both Bichen and the wall as he thought, I’ll definitely have to cross out our names from this wall. I can’t possibly let others know who did this. No, no, no, taking down the entire wall is much faster…

JUST WHAT ON EARTH DID HE DRAW THERE?!

Leaping onto the wall, he looked down at the dog guarding the house, his cold expression making it seem as though he was having a faceoff with it. Wei WuXian’s limbs wrapped around him like a braid, his face buried deep into his neck. His entire body was frozen as he roared, “Stop staring each other! Go, let’s go!!! Take me away, Lan Zhan!!! Ahhhhhhh!!!”

sdfslkdjglksdjg Lan Wangji having a faceoff with a dogggggg I must draw thissss

Now that he could finally catch his breath a bit, he praised, “HanGuang-Jun, you’re so brave!”

Hearing this, Lan WangJi seemed to smile.

Ughhh here we go again XDDDDD

If people where to know about this they'd be soooo shocked, it's as if the Joker and Batman run around the streets doing shenanigans and then the Joker wholeheartedly praises him for how good and awesome he is.

It's like, both Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji are such complex characters, their love and relationship being not your typical one, yet at this moment they're acting in such a cringe, typical way of two people in love hahahaha if only Lan Jingyi was here to see this after Wei Wuxian told him that he and Hanguang Jun don't say romantic farewells to each other

Wei WuXian swept them off of him as he laughed, “You’re so dirty!”

Lan WangJi, “Wash my face for me.”

Wei Wuxian: "you're so dirty!"

Lan Wangji: *wife detected*

The two of them had long since seen each other unclothed before in the Cloud Recesses’ cold spring, but back then, both of the two were boys without a single sideways thought. When he ran into Lan WangJi taking a bath, he didn’t have any other ideas either, and during both those two times, more than half of Lan WangJi’s body was buried underwater. And so, suddenly seeing such an uncovered HanGuang-Jun… It was needless to say that Wei WuXian received quite a big shock.

How....how BIG was the shock, Wei Wuxian?

He couldn’t help but to walk backwards, but as he walked back, Lan WangJi continued to walk forward. Wei WuXian had already backed away to a corner of the wall. He couldn’t hide at all, and could only braven up as he watched Lan WangJi approach him expressionlessly. The distinct Adam’s Apple, fair-colored skin, and smooth, aesthetic muscles flashed before his eyes so clearly that he didn’t even dare look at them straight, eyes averting slightly. He swallowed unconsciously, somehow feeling a bit parched.

*SCREAMS*

Wei WuXian was almost in a state of despair. He clenched his teeth, pretending like everything was fine, “I’m only pouring the bathwater for you. Okay. You can do the rest now.” As he spoke, he was just about to move away when Lan WangJi suddenly reached out and tore his sash belt into half.

His face was still all serious, but his movements were extremely rough. Wei WuXian never expected that he’d do such a thing.

Look who has the upper hand now, mister Wei "let's strip all of our clothes don't worry I don't like men in the Xuanwu cave" Wuxian.

Wei WuXian let out a sigh of relief, “Then take your time bathing. I’ll be outside.” As he finished, he was about to flee and get some fresh air to calm himself when he suddenly heard a splash. He turned around and looked, “Why did you come out again?!”

Lan WangJi’s face was cold, “Not bathing anymore.”

LET'S GO LAN ZHAN! DON'T LET HIM TAKE THE GAME INTO HIS OWN HANDS

Looking at him, Wei WuXian felt a place in his heart go soft. He also thought it was funny. This one’d been like this ever since he was young. When he wanted something, he never said anything on the surface, but rather chased after it as much as he could in his actions.

And why is it that you don't realize that the "something" Lan Wangji wants and chases after in his actions IS ALSO YOU?!

He took up the wooden spoon inside the tub. Carefully, he let the warm water pour evenly down Lan WangJi’s head

Oh, this part reminds me of a drawing I did of Lan Wangji washing Wei Wuxian, and I wasn't sure if that "spoon" (?) I drew was correct?

Chapter 95: Longing (Part Six)

Back then, Lan WangJi took off his hair tie and forehead ribbon on his own. His hair fell and covered his upper body. But now, after he moved Lan WangJi’s wet, black hair behind his shoulder and began to wipe his chest, the thirty-or-so discipline whip marks and the brand at his chest could be seen with clarity.

Again, I wonder how MXTX imagined his hairstyle.

The whip marks climbed from Lan WangJi’s back all the way to his chest, shoulders, arms, sprawling across the smooth, white skin. These almost hideous scars, whether dark or light, destroyed what could be called the perfect male body.

This is interesting because I saw fanarts where people draw Lan Wangji's scars as concentrated on the back only. I think that would've been the case if they'd imagine him receiving the lashes from a wooden stick (like it was depicted in CQL). I always tended to draw his scars as covering the arms and the shoulders because I imagined him being whipped by a whip, and a whip is much more longer and elastic, so while its body can indeed strike the hardest on the center of the impact (the back of the person), the tip of the whip also lashes on the surrounding parts like shoulders, arms, waist etc.

He was extremely gentle, as if he didn’t want to hurt Lan WangJi, but these were old wounds already. They’d never hurt again. And even if they were fresh scars, with Lan WangJi’s personality, he definitely wouldn’t display a single sign of weakness, even at the most painful times.

This is what Lan Wangji does in HoG T^T he hides the pain.

Lan WangJi didn’t say anything, only shaking his hand. Seeing how he looked, all quiet and obedient, sitting in the tub, Wei WuXian felt quite sorry. Curving his finger, he scratched his chin to show comfort. Just the chin wasn’t even enough. Feeling his fingers itch, he even wanted to poke Lan WangJi’s abs, but before it was even halfway there, his wrist was suddenly caught by Lan WangJi, whose voice was low, “Do not touch me.”

A few transparent drops of water still remained on his eyelashes and his handsome features. His expression seemed cold, but his eyes were searing.

Tonight, Wei WuXian had already done countless frivolous little things to Lan WangJi. He’d long since gotten used to Lan WangJi letting him do whatever he wanted. Right now, having been stopped so suddenly, he was still brave, “Why not? Haven’t you let me touch you for so long already?”

Lan WangJi’s lips were sealed. He said nothing, whether angered or not. Seeing this, Wei WuXian was a bit guilty, “Fine. I won’t touch you anymore. Do it yourself.”

As he spoke, he tossed the cloth away and was about to leave. Yet, not only did Lan WangJi refuse to let him go, the hand around his wrist gripped even tighter. He ordered, “Do not go.”

Wei WuXian struggled for sometime and couldn’t get out of it. He steeled his nerves, “HanGuang-Jun, now you’re at fault here. You told me to wash your face, didn’t let me touch you, and didn’t let me go. Just what do you want me to do?”

“…” After a moment of silence, Lan WangJi’s tone was almost unreasonable, “In any case, you may not go.”

Wei WuXian splashed some water onto Lan WangJi’s face, “Look at you, all domineering and unreasonable!”

Lan WangJi didn’t flinch or dodge even as the water splashed onto his face, “I told you not to touch me.”

LKSJDGLKSJDLKHGJLHITURLOHJG THE TENSTION!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Also this is so interesting but this part doesn't exist in the 7seas version. (I mean the part where Wei Wuxian almost leaves, tells him to wash alone, and Lan Wangji forbids him from leaving) This part is honestly really hot, but I think the version of MDZS that 7seas translated from is an older version before MXTX did revisions, right? Even the audio drama has this part, and I think the audio drama follows the newer version.

If I'm wrong please correct me. In any way, I'm so happy that MXTX added this scene it adds to the tension and the sexy build up.

This seemed like a warning. Perhaps because the wine really had a strong aftereffect, Wei WuXian’s head felt abnormally feverish. The corner of his mouth curved up, “If I’m touching you, no matter what, what can you do to me? Punish me by making me copy scriptures? Have me grounded? Or silence me?”

I love this part because I think it holds many meanings. First, it's Wei Wuxian recalling their past, as him being the problematic student and Lan Wangji being the one who was supervising his punishment. It also recalls the parts where Lan Wangji was the one to drag him to punishments himself. Wei Wuxian taket and reminds Lan Wangji of the past they shared, and how their relationship looked like most of the times - of the one crossing the line and the one being punished for it. For me it also holds a bit of bitterness, because this is like shoving it in Lan Wangji's face and saying "you were never chill towards me. I tried to get closer to you but all you did was punish me and be cruel to me".

Second, this also reminds the time Wei Wuxian thought that Lan Wangji would lock him up and punish him in his Laozu days. Wei Wuxian always perceived Lan Wangji as the one who punishes, and maybe what he says here is a recall on that too.

Third, exactly because of all of this, it seems that Wei Wuxian WANTS to spark that past relationship again, maybe because at this moment he's afraid that Lan Wangji doesn't want him in the same way he does, and how can he get his attention if not by taunting him that he'd do something forbidden that he can be punished for?

And finally,  that his words perhaps awaken the sexual desire that both of them had, as we see in later chapters, that they RP the punishing, or that it appears in their dreams. Something that carved the essence of their relationship since their younger days turned to be a desire for the both of them. So when Wei Wuxian suggests it, it's also because maybe he wants Lan Wangji to do that, because like he said, he LOVES it when he's angry, it turns him on, it was the main reason he bullied him so much when they were young. And these words also drive Lan Wangji crazy because he DOES want to punish him so bad, and it really takes all of his strength not to tie him up and f%^&k the brains out of him.

The face, the expression, the eyes, the situation, and the person. Wei WuXian drew in a breath.

As though having decided to go all out, he shoved his other hand into the water, found a certain part of Lan WangJi’s body, and scooped, “HanGuang-Jun, don’t tell me you don’t like it when I touch you like this?”

Wei WuXian’s daring words and act finally enraged his opponent.

Lan WangJi seemed as if he’d been bitten by a poisonous snake, pulling violently. Wei WuXian felt a terrifying force sweep over. He couldn’t help from being pulled in.

Water splashed everywhere. Things had gotten out of hand. It was all the same, no matter who started it first. When Wei WuXian felt a bit more clear-headed, he was already sitting on Lan WangJi’s legs.

The two embraced and kissed each other in such a position for quite a long while.

FIANLLY!!! THE TENSION OF 95 CHAPTER BROKE!!!!! GO KISS AND FUCK YOU IDIOTS GO DO ITTTT

Also Wei Wuxian just plunging his hand in and GRABBING the thing, my god, the way you want this man!

No, hands down, this is one of the hottest love scenes I have ever read and I read A LOT, it's so damn satisfying because you can see how the both of them wanted it so much yet had to control themselves and now all restrains are off and each one of them shows exactly how much he wanted this, Wei Wuxian by teasing him, suggesting things and finally grabbing his d*ck and Lan Wangji by warning him, grabbing his wrist tightly and then finally pulling him inside.

AHHHHHH

Wei WuXian grinned as he caught his breath, “How’s that? You angry yet? You don’t know this, Lan Zhan, but I love it when you’re angry…”

The line that explains everything he did in the past. Just like the scene in the ban when he realizes that boys bully those they like, he confesses that seeing Lan Wangji getting worked up because of him turn him on madly hehehe

I drew this scene according to the audio drama, because right after Wei Wuxian says these words, Lan Wangji pull him into another mad kissing session and I just had to draw that

Wei WuXian’s back hurt from the collision. He yelped a few times, and Lan WangJi paused shortly. Wei WuXian immediately flipped around and pushed him onto the bed, holding him down as hard as he could. He said beside his ear, “I couldn’t tell you’d be so fierce in bed…”

OK SO THIS PART IS THE ONE THAT I NEVER UNDERSTOOD HOW THEIR FIRST SEXYTIME SESSION ACTUALLY WENT!!!

So yeah, this is how EXR version tells it. I don't know if the fault is in the translation or in MXTX missing this when she made her rivisions, but yeah, this makes no sense.

First, Lan Wangi is the one pinning him to the bed. Then we understand that Wei Wuxian flips them around and now he's on top. The entire session that is described afterwards simply makes no sense (anatomically and physically) if Wei Wuxian is on top. And this is why even if I wanted to draw this scene, I just had no idea how.

Going to the 7seas version and other fan translations found online, you can see that no mention of Wei Wuxian going on top exist. He remains lying under Lan Wangji, and all that follows actually makes sense from then on.

After he said it, he indeed untied his sash belt and took off his lower garments. Stark naked, he lowered himself on Lan WangJi again.

Here too. It says that Wei Wuxian lowered himself on Lan Wangji, however, in 7seas and other translations it says that he lowered Lan Wangji back, pressing him on himself.

From a translation online: True to his words, Wei WuXian ripped his own pants off without hesitation. Raw and undisguised, he wrapped his arms around Lan WangJi’s firm shoulders and pulled Lan WangJi back onto himself.

Both of the two were bare. Skin brushed against skin. With intimacy, they kissed, turning their heads. Wei WuXian pressed the back of Lan WangJi’s neck with his left hand, not letting him open up a single sliver of space between the two, biting and rubbing his lips. With his right hand, he chased down the graceful yet powerful lines of Lan WangJi’s back. When he felt the somewhat uneven scars, he stroked them tenderly with the tips of his fingers.

Yup, so again, this makes no sense if Wei Wuxian is on top, because how can he freely caress Lan Wangji's back if it's pressed to the bed? In 7seas version it makes more sense.

However, Lan WangJi’s hands were just too strong, and he liked to pinch the sensitive regions as well. At first, Wei WuXian was able to enjoy it, but it soon became an unbearable throbbing. He gasped, moving his stinging, swollen lips away. His chest heaved up and down, “HanGuang-Jun, w-why are you like this after you take off your clothes? Where are you pinching? You really don’t deserve to be called a gentleman.”

Feigning disappointment, he removed the completely ungentlemanly hand of Lan WangJi’s. Lan WangJi let out a low growl, sounding quite dangerous. Wei WuXian, “Don’t be like this. Come on, I’ll let you pinch me. Pinch here.” As he spoke, he led Lan WangJi’s hand towards his lower region, laughing quietly as he mumbled, “Pinch however you want to. Use your muscles.”

The EXR translation here misses the bit where Lan Wangji bit Wei Wuxian's nipple. Here's from the 7seas:

At first, Wei WuXian could still enjoy the attention. But after a while, he felt that Lan WangJi begin to knead the delicate skin near the base of his thighs/ It was a sensitive area, and Lan Wangji’s hand was terrifyingly strong – it didn’t take long for his pinching to make the skin there prickle and hurt, making him weak and sending tingles through his body. He choked a little on his own breath and pulled his red and swollen lips away to gasp for air. Still having strength enough to tease, he feigned to move his utterly ungentlemanly hand away.

“Hanguang-Jun, I can’t believe you’re this feral when your clothes are off. What a smudge on your reputation as an elegant…ah!”

Lan WangJi mercilessly pinched his nipple.  Wei WuXian’s body recoiled and retreated instinctively and instantly. A dangerous sound growled from Lan WangJi’s throat. Wei WuXian hurriedly said, “Alright, okay, don’t be like this. I’ll let you pinch me.” As he spoke, he took Lan WangJi’s hand in his and guided it back down to his lower body, smiling, “pinch and squeeze however you want.”

Now I know that EXR would not miss such a part. I wonder if it's really a different version that MXTX wrote after the revision (I know that chapter 111 was also revised and censored by her.) Again, if you have more info about this, please share! :)

Lan WangJi’s breaths suddenly became heavier, while what was in Wei WuXian’s hand also throbbed, growing even hotter. Beside their ears were each other’s insuppressible pants and Wei WuXian’s moans.

I love 7seas version here too, it seems more elaborate and I think that EXR's version is probably more censored?

Lan Wangji’s breaths turned harsh and heavy, and the veins of his member pulsed as it grew even more scalding hot in Wei Wuxian’s hand. Their ears were filled with eachother’s increasingly uncontrollable panting, as well as Wei Wuxian’s insuppressible moans.

Just as he was thinking how to explain himself to make it sound sincere and serious when Lan WangJi suddenly pushed him away.

With how sudden it was, Wei WuXian’s back slammed hard against the bed.

He widened his eyes, so surprised that he couldn’t move. On the other hand, Lan WangJi sat upright. His chest heaved. His breathing was a bit rushed.

In silence, the two stared at each other for a long time. The first to move was Lan WangJi.

His face was pale, but his eyes were clear. He first picked up a white piece of clothing from the ground to cover Wei WuXian, and then went to find something for himself.

Wei WuXian was still confused. He almost couldn’t believe what had happened.

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO Just as he was about to confess T^T

Although Wei WuXian didn’t know when he woke up, now that he was awake, Lan WangJi’s reaction meant that one thing was clear: he didn’t want to continue what they were doing. He didn’t want to listen to Wei WuXian finish what he was saying, either.

Wei WuXian finally realized just how cruel what he did was.

*CRIES*

Chapter 96: Longing (Part Seven)

Wei WuXian blurted, “No thanks!!!”

Lan WangJi’s hand paused in mid-air before being retracted.

Wei WuXian let out a sigh of relief, murmuring, “You don’t have to. I’ll do it on my own. You don’t have to touch me.”

THE MISUNDERSTANDINGSSSS ;____________________:

Wei WuXian only put on one boot before continuing, “But you don’t have to feel too apologetic either. Uh, it’s normal for men to be like this sometimes. Please…don’t take it too seriously.”

Lan WangJi looked at him quietly, “Normal?”

His voice sounded more than calm.

Wei WuXian didn’t dare respond. Lan WangJi asked again, “Do not take it too seriously?”

NO NO NO NO NO WEI WUXIAN YOU DON'T SAY SUCH THINGS!!!!!!

The way they made this part in the audio drama is SOOO good, you can so totally hear the PAIN in Lan Wangji's voice T^T

Wei WuXian, “Yes, please, thank you… Wait! Then, could we have two rooms please?”

The owner mused, “Why two rooms?”

THE OWNER IS A TRUE FANGIRL, SHE COULD'VE JUST SAID YES AND ACCEPTED THE MONEY FOR 2 SEPARATE ROOMS, BUT THEIR LOVE IS MORE IMPORTANT TO HER!!! CHANGE THEIR MINDS OWNER, THEY ARE IDIOTS!!!

After she answered, she indeed switched them to two rooms before she walked downstairs, holding the hem of her dress. Wei WuXian expressed his gratitude and opened the door to his room. Turning around, he saw Lan WangJi standing in the hallway, holding Bichen in one hand and fiddling with his forehead ribbon in the other. He looked down and said nothing.

Wei WuXian wanted to hide inside his room as soon as possible, but after he looked, he couldn’t walk another step. With much thought, he finally spoke, careful yet sincere, “Lan Zhan, about tonight, I’m sorry.”

With a while of silence, Lan WangJi breathed, “You do not have to say this to me.”

After he put on his forehead ribbon properly, he became the disciplined HanGuang-Jun once more.

This part always made me so sad, that I went and made a comic about it for the Lan Wangji zine, of what happens when Lan Wangji enters his own room.

Chapter 97: Longing (Part Eight)

Wei WuXian reached out, stroking the two kissing figures on the wall, and arrived at the words ‘Lan WangJi was here’ right above it. He had to erase these words, but before he did so, he used his fingertip to trace the lines of the name ‘Lan WangJi.’

Once. Twice. Thrice.

The more he traced them, the more he didn’t want to let go.

My boy you are so in love. I only imagine what must be going on in his thoughts, that he's suddenly so madly in love with that boy he used to know, and that man who questioned his ways in the past. sldkfjsldkfj oh how the turntables, Wei Ying!

Suddenly, picking up on a shuffling sound, he felt alarmed, as it was the middle of the night. As he walked around the corner and looked, he saw a black-robed figure lean forward against the wall, holding a file and trying to even out the graffiti marks on the wall with much dedication.

Wei WuXian, “…”

Wen Ning turned around. His face was covered in white dust, “Young Master, why are you here?”

Wei WuXian, “What are you doing?”

“Oh.” Wen Ning, “Young Master Lan wrote so much. If the people here woke up tomorrow morning and saw this, it’d probably cause them quite a lot of trouble, so I’m here to get rid of some of them…” After a pause, he asked, “Where’s Young Master Lan?”

Nobody deserves Wen Ning. He's such an angel. The sheer fact that he THOUGHT about the possibility that the inscriptions can ruin Lan Wangji's reputation! He's so considerate!

Wei WuXian could tell at first glance that he was feeling embarrassed. Unconsciously, he glanced at himself, and realized he had a few red fingerprints on his wrists, made by Lan WangJi when he grabbed him and pushed him onto the bed. He touched his lips. They were also still slightly swollen. When they dizzily rolled around on the bed, hugging so hard they almost became one, Lan WangJi bit and nibbled at his body. His neck was probably quite a scene as well.

sdfsjdlkgjsldkjhlskdjh!!!!!!!!!!!!

He thought about it some more. Wen Ning didn’t know where he was going, but he didn’t know either, did he? In the beginning, when he was with Lan WangJi, he never thought about this problem at all. He took it as granted that they’d continue like this without change. But after tonight, maybe he and Lan WangJi wouldn’t go back to how they were ever again. Without Lan WangJi, it seemed as if it wasn’t too impossible for him to roam the world on his own.

But a voice in Wei WuXian’s heart told him with clarity, No, you can’t.

The words he said back on Koi Tower really proved to be true. The current Wei WuXian couldn’t do without Lan WangJi.

OH MY GOD.

Chapter 99: Hatred (Part Two)

But he didn’t know that after Lan WangJi, Wen Ning, and he departed from Lotus Pier, Jin Ling secretly went to find him. Realizing he was gone, he threw a tantrum at his uncle who ran madly around, making people unsheathe their swords. He criticized that Wei WuXian ran away all because of him, and Jiang Cheng slammed him on the ground right after. And so, Jin Ling decided that he might as well do everything, taking Fairy to trace Wei WuXian’s tracks.

LMAO I can't with the mental image of Jiang Cheng throwing a tantrum in front of everybody. running around like a crazed man hahahaha.

Also Jin Ling went after Wei Wuxian! I wonder what he wanted to tell him.

A monk replied, “The dog was wild. It bit anyone in its path. I was unable subdue it, and it ran off.”

Jin GuangYao, “Find it and kill it. The dog’s quite bright. It wouldn’t do us well if it led someone over.”

“Yes!”

The monk left with his sword, and the doors finally closed. Jin Ling was more than astonished, blurting, “You’re really gonna kill it? You were the one who gave me Fairy!”

[...]

Jin GuangYao broke into a smile, “Brother, what are you thinking? Of course, I know Jin Ling’s not only a child but my nephew as well. What did you think I’d do? Silence him by murder?”

Lan XiChen didn’t say anything. Jin GuangYao shook his head, turning to Jin Ling, “A-Ling, you heard him. If you make a ruckus, perhaps I’d do some scary things to you. Do as you see fit, please.”

This really sends chills down my spine. The way Jin GuangYao is so ready to break character so fast in front of the nephew he cared for for years!!! The ease with which he suggests to kill the dog he himself gifted him as if it never meant anything. The ease with which he implies that he can kill Jin Ling himsel, after all those years he played the considerate nice uncle....I mean it must be such a shock to poor Jin Ling.

Ant it really makes you think how Jin Ling always loved Jin Guangyao more than Jiang Cheng because the latter was always harsh towards him. But in reality when Jiang Cheng constantly threatened to break his legs it was always, ALWAYS because he was afraid for him, yet he never did nothing of the sort. Jin Guangyao, on the other hand, was always caring to Jin Ling, telling him to avoid fights, and yet at this moment threatens to kill him in the most brutal way and he isn't even joking. He says it with the most calm smile on his face.

Wei WuXian glanced at him before turning to Lan XiChen, “It’s like this. I couldn’t sleep tonight and took a stroll outside the inn. I only came here accidentally. HanGuang-Jun’s in another room. He doesn’t know I went out.”

Jin GuangYao found this strange, “You two got two rooms?”

We gotta hand MXTX a prize for this entire scene that will happen now, where the villain, in the "final boss fight" part of the story, is the one who's interested in the relationship of the main characters and makes it progress, acting in such a gossiping way as if he's an old auntie in the town market, and not the chief cultivator of the entire cultivational world, who tricked everybody, killed important figures, arranged the deaths of thousands using the tiger seal, and now holding people hostage.

However, there was no joking tone in Lan XiChen’s voice, “Young Master Wei, did something happen between you two?”

Without the genial smile on his face, he looked even more like Lan WangJi with such a serious expression. Wei WuXian couldn’t understand why his reaction was so big. He felt guilty in the first place, “Sect Leader Lan, what could’ve happened between us? As of the moment, let’s turn our attention to dealing with this one.”

He gestured to Jin GuangYao with his eyes. With the reminder, Lan XiChen replied, “I was too impatient. My apologies.”

THE WAY LAN XICHEN KNOWS THAT THEY HAD A FIGHT JUST CAUSE THEY GOT TWO SEPERATE ROOMS

Yet, Jin GuangYao smiled, “So it seems that a problem indeed happened. And not a small problem, at that.”

I can't this is hilarious hahahahahahaha like "let's halt my evil plan to figure out just what happened between second young master Lan and you, young master Wei?" *sits down with a bowl of sunflower seeds* "spill the gossip".

Jin GuangYao, “Of course not. I just had to comment. HanGuang-Jun spent so many years in yearning, and even today he hasn’t gotten his happy ending yet. Not only does Sect Leader Lan have a good reason to feel impatient, even an outsider can’t bear watching it.”

Wei WuXian whirled around, “What yearning? What happy ending?”

Hearing this, both Jin GuangYao and Lan XiChen seemed surprised. They examined his expression carefully, as though trying to see if he was purposely pretending to be oblivious.

THIS MOMENT LMAOOOOOOOOO

Lan Xichen just realized that Jin Guangyao lied to him all these years, is currently held hostage without his powers, is listening to how Jin Guangyao threatens to kill people just like that, and yet at this moment both of them are so SHOCKED that Wei Wuxian has no idea about Lan Wangji's feelings, that they suddenly turned to be at the same team of "girl, are you serious?"

Anger could be seen on Lan XiChen’s face, “If it were not related to you, could he have done those to himself without a reason?!”

TT_____________________TT

Wei Wuxian was really the one who changed Lan Wangji. :')

After you were satisfied with the killing, you were a spent arrow as well. WangJi was injured on your rampage. He was in no better shape than you, barely supporting himself by leaning on Bichen. In spite of this, as he saw you stumble away, he immediately followed.

This is so beautiful omgggggg I still imagine it in such a cinematic way. AHHHH I WANT TO DRAW EVERYTHING!!!

WangJi hid you in a cave. When we arrived, you sat blankly on a rock within the cave. Holding your hand, WangJi was giving you spiritual energy. He kept on whispering to you. But throughout the whole time, you repeated the same two words at him.

“‘Get lost’!”

T^T!!!!

My baby Lan Zhan! He was so afraid to lose him! He probably blamed himself too, that he was never there for him, and if he was there for him, if only he didn't reject him, would Wei Wuxian's path be different? (THIS IS WHAT I DO HOG FOR)

I really wonder what he whispered to him in that cave. Also poor boy trying to transfer the spiritual energy not knowing that it's useless ;____;

Growing up, he had never talked back to Uncle and me even once. But for you, not only did WangJi talk back to him, he even met with his sword the cultivators from the GusuLan Sect. He heavily injured all thirty-three of the seniors we asked to come…”

Meeting Wei Wuxian broke Lan Wangji out of the world his sect and his uncle built for him. He could see things in another light, he tried to do things in another way. Perhaps Lan Wangji never wanted to be the perfect student his uncle tried to create just because the crimes of his mother. Perhaps he really did want to be like Wei Wuxian and have a taste of his world (I suppose his drunken states show somewhat of his true unrestrained desires). And now that the life of his love was at stake, that was the real moment he dared to break everything he known, only to protect him ;___;

But he said… that he could not say with certainty whether what you did was right or wrong, but no matter what, he was willing to be responsible for all of the consequences alongside you.

Yup. Again. This is what I believe he felt, that he felt responsible not only for Wei Wuxian's actions, but for his state of being in general. I believe this is why he wanted to bring him to Gusu in the first place. He suddenly felt that if he won't be there for him and with him, Wei Wuxian's situation will deteriorate. Again, this is what Lan Wangji in House of Gentians tries to do. He tries to get closer to him after years of rejecting him, believing this is his fault that Wei Wuxian turned this way.

They say those years were him reflecting on his mistakes, but in reality he was entirely bedridden. Even so, when he knew of your passing away, he still dragged such a body to Burial Mound to take one last look, no matter what…

*CRIES*

Lan Wangji in House of Gentians uses every amount of spiritual energy he has to hide the fact that he's hurting. Just like Wei Wuxian said himself in this novel, even if the scars were still new and still hurting, Lan Wangji would never show it.

Young Master Wei, after you returned in your body, how did you pester him and confess to him? Every night… Every night, you had to… And you say you do not know? If you did not know, why did you do such things?”

[...]

At first, he did those shameful, theatrical things in order to make Lan WangJi feel disgust and throw him out of the Cloud Recesses so that they wouldn’t meet each other again, going their separate ways. Lan WangJi wouldn’t have failed to see what his real attitude was. But even when this was the case… he still chose to keep him by his side, refusing to give Jiang Cheng the chance to approach and make things difficult for him. He answered all questions, granted all requests, indulged him and forgave him again and again. Even when faced with Wei WuXian’s myriad of almost cruel teasing, he was still able to hold himself from crossing the line.

Y'all probably remember the comic I did about this part. It always made me wonder, JUST HOW IN HELL DID LAN XICHEN KNOW OF THE SHAMELESS THINGS WEI WUXIAN DID TO LAN WANGJI WHEN THEY ROAMED TOGETHER?!?!?!?!?!?

Wei WuXian really couldn’t keep on thinking any longer. He rushed towards the Guanyin Temple’s doors, and cultivators immediately stopped him. Jin GuangYao, “Young Master Wei, I do understand your current excitement…”

Right now, all Wei WuXian wanted to do was to rush back to the inn, rush to Lan WangJi’s side, and tell him his feelings no matter how much he rambled. With one strike, he sent two monks who tried to stop him flying away, roaring, “You understand my ass!”

Hahahahahahahahaha the powers he suddenly gets when he's in love and understands that he was an asshole!

Chapter 100: Hatred (Part Three)

The shocking confession just now struck Lan WangJi with such force that he still hadn’t finished processing it. A few rare streaks of loss and confusion appeared on his normally calm face. It wasn’t the first time Wei WuXian hugged him as if he was clinging on for dear life, but this time, it was as though Lan WangJi’s body had turned into a heavy log. He froze so much that he didn’t even know where to put his hands.

Wei WuXian, “Lan Zhan, did you hear what I said?!”

Lan WangJi’s lips moved. A moment later, he spoke, “You…” He’d always been concise and comprehensive with his words, never pausing at all. But right now, he paused with more hesitance than ever. Another moment later, he continued, “You said…”

Oh this is GLORIOUS XDDD

He's frozen, speechless, shocked at the shameless words, happy at the shameless words, AND HE IS HELPLESS hahahahahaha

the mighty Hanguang Jun who prepared himself for the boss fight is standing there like a puppet being hugged by the man who told him he loved to have sex with him just now.

Lan WangJi gathered four cushions from the temple, giving two to Lan XiChen and Jin Ling and two to Wei WuXian and him. But for some reason, both Lan XiChen and Jin Ling moved their cushions quite far away from them. And coincidentally, they gazed into the distance in unison.

Something tells me that Lan Xichen and Jin Ling moved the cushions farther because of different reasons

After a deep breath, Wei WuXian whispered, “… I really do have a bad memory. I can’t remember a lot of the things that happened in the past, including the time at the Nightless City. I don’t remember a single bit of what happened during those days.”

Hearing this, Lan WangJi’s eyes widened slightly.

The way he widened his eyes really shows how surprised he was to know that Wei Wuxian didn't remember his confession. He probably really DID think that Wei Wuxian did all those shameless things to him because he remembered Lan Wangji's feelings. The RELIEF the man must be feeling at this moment!

(Or maybe, deep down he's also disappointed that his love doesn't remember the heroic deed he did for him. Remember what Wei Wuxian talked about when he save MianMian and how I said that Lan Wangji was probably taking notes? hahahahaha what if that was his heroic deed he wanted Wei Wuxian to remember him by and come crying to him telling "I'm sorry" and "thank you" like Mianmian lolllll)

Wei WuXian, “You’re really great. I like you.”

“…”

“Or in other words, I fancy you, I love you, I want you, I can’t leave you, I whatever you.”

“…”

“I want to night-hunt with you for the rest of my life.”

“…”

Just how beautiful is that?!

“And I want to sleep with you every day. I swear it’s not the heat of the moment or joking around like I’ve done in the past. I’m not doing it out of gratitude either. Anyways, it’s not because of anything else. I really just like you so much I want to sleep with you. I don’t want anyone but you—it can’t be anyone but you. You can do anything you want to me, however you like it. I’ll accept everything, as long as you’re willing to…”

And this too! The straightforward way in which he says all these things, is so Wei Wuxianishly beautiful!
BUT ALSO WEI YING YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW SEX BETWEEN MEN WORKS YOU HAVE NOOOOOO IDEA WHAT YOU JUST TOLD LAN WANGJI TO DO, BECUASE UNLIKE YOU, LAN WANGJI DID LOOK AT GAYP0RN BOOKS AND HE DOES HAPPEN TO KNOW A THING OR TWO AND NOW HEARING YOU SAY ALL THOSE THINGS HE CAN DO TO YOU + ON AN EVERYDAY BASIS, YOU HAVE NO IDEA WHAT YOU SIGNED UP FOR LMAOOOOO

Wei WuXian couldn’t let out another sound. Amidst the darkness, Lan WangJi had already embraced him tightly, stopping him with his lips.

Lan WangJi’s breaths were short and disordered. His hoarse voice whispered beside Wei WuXian’s ear, “… fancy you…”

Wei WuXian hugged him tight, “Yes!”

Lan WangJi, “… love you, want you…”

Wei WuXian raised his voice, “Yes!”

Lan WangJi, “Cannot leave you… do not want anyone but you… it cannot be anyone but you!”

He repeated over and over again the words Wei WuXian said to him, his voice and his body trembling at the same time. Wei WuXian was almost under the illusion that he was about to cry.

After every sentence, the arm he wrapped around Wei WuXian’s waist tightened. Wei WuXian hurt from the embrace, but the arms he wrapped around Lan WangJi’s back tightened as well, almost making him unable to breathe. But still, he savored every moment as he wished to hug him even tighter.

He couldn’t see anything.

But their chests were right against each other’s. The two hearts couldn’t hide at all. Wei WuXian felt it with clarity—Lan WangJi’s throbbing heart, the heat that was about to break out of that chest, and something that landed at his neck before disappearing soundlessly, something that might have resembled a tear.

This part actually makes me feel tightness in my throat and as if my breath is taken away. When Wei Wuxian says it, it's beautiful, but when Lan Wangji repeats that, in the hoarse voice, shaking, it...it hits different. It's Lan Wangji who went through hell,  in Wei Wuxian's first life,  in the 13 years he was dead without return, and in his second life when he seemed so cruel and teasing. Now, finally having his feeling returned, with all those promises, Lan Wangji repeats them again and again while holding Wei Wuxian tightly, as if trying to make the words real, making them come true, hoping that this isn't a dream, that Wei Wuxian is here, he's his, and that he's never going away again.

My heart really feels it. I want to cry with him!

After he entered, he was just about to throw the person down when he saw Wei WuXian and Lan WangJi on two cushions by the side, still stuck together and refusing to part.

Su She coming in late to see his arch enemies are actually gay for each other.

Perhaps Su She had been holding it back for too many years. He’d keep on rambling all on his own even without anyone provoking him. He examined Lan WangJi from top to bottom and mocked, “Things are already like this, and you’re still holding up the front you think looks so calm and collected. How long do you want to keep it up for?”

Bruh, the man just had the love of his life finally confess to him, da hell you want, thinking it's all about you!?

BTW it always was so "URGHHHHH" to think that after they confessed they still need to sit there in the temple and deal with Jin Guangyao's evil plot, like who the hell have time for that?! THEY JUST SHARED THEIR LOVE FOR EACHOTHER AND I BET ALL THEY WANNA DO IS GET OUT, FIND AN INN, TALK MORE ABOUT THEIR LOVE AND JUST FUCK.

Anyways, remember when I drew that?

You should be glad you didn’t study at the YunmengJiang Sect, Sect Leader Su.”

Su She’s voice was cold, “Why?”

Wei WuXian, “Or else you would’ve long since been angered to death by me. When I was young, every day I wholehearted believed that I was a prodigy, that I was such a fucking big deal. And not only did I believe it in my heart, I even flaunted it everywhere.”

Like I said in the commentary of previous chapters, I really like the self criticism Wei Wuxian expresses to his past self. It's an interesting character development.

Su She’s face was almost green. To anger him was Wei WuXian’s original intention, anyways. But suddenly, from above him came a light laugh.

It was so extremely light that one would doubt they heard wrong.

But Wei WuXian immediately looked up. He very clearly saw beside Lan WangJi’s lips the transient glimpse of a soft smile that resembled sunlight reflected over snow. This time, not only Su She, even Lan XiChen and Jin Ling paused in astonishment.

Everyone knew that HanGuang-Jun was always cold and never smiled, almost unlively. Only few had seen what he looked like when he smiled, even if it was just a slight curl of his lips.

Nobody expected to see his smile under such circumstances.

Wei WuXian’s eyes were immediately opened wide and round.

A moment later, he gulped. His Adam’s apple bobbed up and down, “Lan Zhan, you…”

THE WAY LAN WANGJI IS JUST SO HAPPY  AT THIS MOMENT THAT WEI WUXIAN LOVES HIM THAT HE LAUGHS (LAUGHS!!!!) AT THE MOST STUPID UNFUNNY JOKE EVER JUST CAUSE IT'S WEI WUXIAN WHO SAID IT LMAOOOOO EVERYBODY'S SO SHOCKEDDD

From amidst the storm that had just broken inside, a crackling streak of purple lighting struck right against Su She’s chest, sending him flying backwards. Su She slammed into one of the mahogany pillars, and immediately heaved a mouthful of blood. The two monks guarding the temple door were also affected by the echoes of the attack, thrown onto the ground and unable to get up. A purple figure stepped steadily over the threshold and into the main palace.

The rain blew hard outside the temple, but the figure wasn’t too wet. Only the violet at the hems of his clothes darkened slightly. He held a paper umbrella in his left hand. Rain drops crashed onto the umbrella, water splashing everywhere. The cold light of Zidian continued to sizzle in his right hand. His face was darker than the stormy night.

Jiang Cheng making a sexy entrance from the pouring rain like:

MDZS rereading commentary || Chapters 101-110 

MDZS rereading commentary || Chapters 81-90