The Impossibility of Impossibilities, Part 14 (Patreon)

Deedee spun through empty space. The diapered maid had been asking Sophie to change her, but for the first time, she didn't seem to want to. The next instant, everyone was gone and she was suspended in mid-air. Some people might have found the experience disorienting, or even frightening, but not Deedee. Everything around her delighted her. She giggled and waved at the spiral galaxies that spun gently gently around her. She was so happy. All she needed here was someone to tell her what to do.

“Hey Deedee!” came Christine's voice out of the darkness.

Deedee immediately turned in mid-air to orient herself. “Christine! Master! How wonderful to see you!” she called.

“Good to see you too, Deedee. Have you been a good girl while I've been gone?” asked Will.

“Oh yes, Master! I've been cleaning and obeying everyone, just like you said! I'm so happy! Thank for making me your maid, Master!” squealed Deedee.

“That's great to hear Deedee. Christine, don't you think Deedee deserves a nice reward for putting up with all the bossy women at my penthouse?”

Christine grinned. “Yeah definitely. What do think, Deedee? What would make you really happy?”

Deedee, thought about, then giggled. “I have no idea! All my opinions are so stupid! Could you do the thinking for me, Christine? I'm no good at it!”

“You got it, Deedee. Will, I want you to give Deedee her free will back. Make her like she was before.”

Will scratched his chin. “I don't know if that would make her happy, but if it's what you want...I wish that the old you could see what she has become.”

Next to Deedee appeared a near exact copy. The only difference was that this version was wearing a set of light green nurse's scrubs with no sign of a diaper bulge. Deedee smiled and waved at her doppelganger. The nurse's expression was one of complete shock.

“Welcome back, Margaret!” called Will.

“I...I...oh my god!” panted the nurse.

“Hi!” said Deedee cheerfully.

“You...you made me wear diapers! And clean your house! And sleep in your bed!” panted the nurse. “I was a complete slave!...I...oh god...the bathroom! My tongue! Ahhhh!” Margaret began retching and wiping her tongue against her sleeve. Deedee continued to watch, smiling blissfully.

“See Christine? I told you she wouldn't be happy.” said Will. He didn't seem the least bit bothered by her obvious distress.

“Wait, I'm confused. Which one is real?” asked Christine.

“Both are. That's one is real, and so is that one. I can make as many as I want! Hey Deedee, I wish I had twenty more like you!

The sparkling night sky was suddenly crowded with happy maids, each wearing an identical dirty diaper. They all began waving at each other and saying “Hi!” in identical cheerful voices.

The lone nurse held her nose. “Oh god, the smell! It's exactly the same, but so much worse!”

Christine crossed her arms. “Great! So since we have all the maids we could possibly want, no harm in letting the real Margaret go home, right?”

“The real Margaret” stopped pinching her nose and looked back at the couch. “Uh, what was that?”

“Christine here was just saying that you might like to go back to your old life, with all the freedom and independence and what-not.” clarified Will.

Margaret squinted suspiciously. “So, I like, wouldn't wear diapers or have to do what I'm told anymore?”

“Exactly! You could return to the normal world, get a new job and do whatever you want with your life.” said Will.

Margaret seemed to consider this. It was hard to concentrate with all the other Deedees waving and greeting one another all around her.

“I mean, I appreciate the offer and all. I would like some time off so I can go see my family again. But, like, a permanent thing? I think I have to pass.”

Christine was flabbergasted. “What? But, you're a slave! Don't you want to live independently and make your own decisions?”

Margaret shrugged. “I lived independently and made my own decisions for a long time, and it never really made me happy. Being Will's happy little diaper maid? I was literally thrilled to be alive every single minute. It's hard to compete with that. I mean, some of the things I had to do seem gross and ridiculous in retrospect, but they were awesome at the time.”

Christine wasn't giving up. “But, you were screaming and gagging a second ago!”

“I know! This is the worst I've felt in days! I'd rather go back to being a happy little ditz. It was...it was actual freedom.”

Christine collapsed back into Will's chest. “Huh, fine. You do you, Margaret.”

“I'm glad you feel that way.” said Will. “Your request for time off is granted. I wish that one Deedee shall be free to wander the world, catch up with family, and do whatever she pleases at any given time. All versions of Deedee shall share a common consciousness, including thoughts and feelings. This version shall be returned to her family for as long as she pleases.

A look of blissful joy filled the nurse's face. Then, she vanished.

Christine was still skeptical. “So, she gets to spend time with her family?”

“Yes!” said one of the cloud of diapered maids.

“She is hugging our father right now!” said another.

“This so cool!” said another.

“Our happiness is hers!” said yet another.

“And hers is ours!” said another.

Christine looked from one grinning maid to another. “Did you just turn her into a hive mind?”

“Sure did!” said Will, grinning. “A very happy, obedient, rather smelly one. Listen up Deedee! Since I gave your usual babysitter the night off, you have permission to get help from Butt Wipes Inc. Enjoy the party, lady and/or ladies!”

“Thank you, Master!” said twenty smiling women in unison. Will snapped his fingers, and they all vanished.

-----

Jillian was spinning through space. The spiral galaxies that she had avoided looking at since she arrived were all around her. This place frightened her. Receiving the invitation that flew into her window of its own accord, then flying to the near-deserted airport, then walking through the bizarre streets full of strange creatures looking desperately for a cab, then being escorted to the part by a hummingbird; it was all too much. She knew she was lucky to be one of the first journalists to investigate the man who seemed to have taken over the entire planet, but she still wondered if it was all worth it. She wanted to go back to the normal world now.

“Welcome Jillian!” said a man's voice in the distance.

She twisted herself in the air to get a look at the speaker. It was a man in casual clothes, lying on a couch. A beautiful woman was resting her head on his chest. The couch was sitting on absolutely nothing. He had a frothing stein full of beer in his hand, and the woman was nursing a glass of sherry.

“Will Freely, I presume?” she asked.

“Of course. And you are Jillian DuChamp. I saw your coverage of the Greenland Portal on the BBC, and I just had to get an interview. What do you think of my private room?”

Jillian glanced hesitantly around at the city stretched out below her, and the majesty of creation that surrounded her on every side. She squinted and tried to focus only on Will. She didn't like the view. It made her feel small and unimportant.

“Very pretty, but I think I prefer a more intimate setting. Still, if my camera crew were here, I'd be happy to get started.” she stated in her most professional tone.

“Oh, I already gave your crew the night off. They've had their bottles and are ready for beddy-byes. Don't worry, we're live right now. The whole world can see us!” said Will.

“Are you...yes, I see you are. Very well, let's get started. I'm sure all our viewers would like to know more about who you are and what brought you to this point?”

“Well, until recently, I worked as a manager at Arby's. My work was dull, tedious, and relentlessly unfulfilling. What made it worse, though, was having no real hope. No matter what I did with my life, or how much success I achieved, I knew that I was still living in a doomed world. The rainforests were being clear-cut. The mountains were being strip-mined. The glaciers were melting. The coral reefs were dying. Species were being wiped out by the dozen every day. It felt like everything wonderful and lovely about the world was being destroyed, and there was nothing I could do about it. Poverty was rampant. Hunger and homelessness were common. The movers and shakers were mostly interesting in prolonging all those problems for their own benefit. It really made me feel shitty all the time on a basic, fundamental level. I sought solace in pleasures and distractions, just trying to forget for a little while.  Now that I control the entire universe, I've decided to help humanity escape all its old problems and finally achieve happiness. This evening is the time I have chosen to reveal myself to the world, and assure you all that I have no intention of harming you. Feel free to live life as you see fit, and enjoy the gifts I have bestowed.”

Jillian knew her business, and as soon as Will finished this speech, she launched another question.

“And may I be introduced to this young lady you have with you?” she asked.

“Say hello to the nice lady, Christine.”

“Hello Jillian. I'm Christine. I was with Will when he first discovered his powers, and I agreed to go along with all of his little whims. As you can see, I'm in diapers. Will put me back in diapers almost as soon as I met him. He loves diapers, and he's made me love them as well. I was pretty depressed at the time because my Mommy was about to die from cancer. But thanks to Will, cancer doesn't even exist anymore, and my Mommy is busy keeping me fed and changed.  I just want everyone on earth to know that I helplessly poop myself like a baby. Will also gave me a huge humiliation fetish, so whenever I get the chance to embarrass myself, I always go for it!”

Jillian felt herself blush hard on Christine's behalf. Her conversation with Lady Happiness earlier had done something to prepare her for this, but it was still shocking to hear it laid out so plainly. A random person receives the powers of a god, and it had to be a diaper fetishist. She rallied.

“It's great you feel you can share that, Christine. Turning back to Will, may I ask what your plans for the future are?”

“For the time being, I am content to allow humanity to spread onto the new worlds I have created for them. There are a lot of cool things out there to see, but I wouldn't want to spoil it for you all. I doubt I'll be interfering very much, unless someone really starts making a mess. I'll be focusing on making my own little realm as perfect as possible. Willtopia is already shaping up to be a paradise, but there's still a lot of tweaking to do before I am content with the final product.”

Jillian knew she was in dangerous territory, but that had never stopped her before. “I'm sure many of our listeners are wondering about the apparent barrier you've created around...Willtopia. Are ever planning to allow men or children back in? And will the women here be allowed to leave?”

Will didn't seem bothered by the question, but Jillian noticed a frightened expression interrupt Christine's beatific smile. Maybe he had expected the question, but she hadn't. Or perhaps, she had hoped it wouldn't come up.

“I have no plans to alter the rules of my domain. Everyone who I expelled can easily find new homes elsewhere. As for my current citizens, some might choose to leave, but most will not. Everyone is happy here, and I intend to keep it that way. Look around you! Who wouldn't want to live surrounded by beauty like this?”

Against her will, Jillian found herself looking around and taking in the view. It did make her feel small and insignificant. The spiral galaxies looked close enough to touch, and yet it was apparent that they were so far away that their light couldn't possibly be seen from earth under normal conditions, and so vast that a thousand generations could live and die in the time it took them to turn a fraction of a degree. Next to them, even the pods of whales soaring through the evening air were insignificant. Jillian was a reporter. Her career depended on the unshakable belief that people needed to hear what she had to say, that what a single person said and did could still matter, even in a world of billions. For a moment, she forgot her solemn duty as an interviewer, and let the universe pour into her.

“Its funny.” said Will, his voice becoming suddenly serious. “Those galaxies sprang into being merely because I wished them to, and yet even I feel insignificant next to them. They actually make me feel humble, instead of proud. I'm just glad to have had the privilege of being the cause of so much wonder. It really puts everything else I desire into perspective. I'm a horny man with a diaper fetish, so I've created a paradise of diapered women. I suppose if you made a rabbit omnipotent, the world would soon be nothing but big juicy carrots and sexy rabbits. Maybe I should put aside my venal desires, and just focus on making the universe itself greater and grander.”

Christine rolled her eyes and began a mental countdown. One...Two...

“Or...” said Will, snapping his fingers. Jillian's contemplation of the infinite was interrupted by a baby bottle that suddenly launched out of the cosmic void and arrived in her hand. The liquid inside was the color of creamy coffee, and on the side were printed the words: Boom-Boom.

“Uh, what...what is this?” sputtered Jillian.

“A party favor.” answered Will, taking another sip of beer. “A little something to make the evening special. Drink up!”

Jillian was still wondering what kind of awful trick was in store for her when the nipple entered her lips. She didn't want to drink from a baby bottle, and certainly not this one, but the words went straight from Will's lips to her arm, and suddenly she was drinking. Within a second, she was sucking harder to get as much of the drink in her as possible. It was the loveliest beverage she had ever had. It made her feel delightfully full and satisfied. She felt her emotions mellow out, as though she were drunk. She looked out at the swirling galaxies around her, and they no longer felt threatening. They seemed peaceful in their unthinkable vastness.

“You enjoy your evening, Jillian. The party is just beginning!

-----

Janet was somewhat relieved when Sophie reappeared, but was less thrilled to discover that she was now apparently unable or unwilling to rise from her chair. The reappearance of Deedee, or rather the crowd of identical women who all looked and acted exactly like Deedee, had done nothing to alleviate her anxiety. Clearly, Will was using his powers to ensure that this evening was going to be special, and she very much doubted that this would turn out to be a good thing.

“Hi!” greeted the crowd of maids as they appeared.

“Uh...hi. Which one of you is Deedee?” asked Janet, looking back and forth at the identical smiling faces.

“This one!” said each Deedee, pointing to herself.

“And that one!” said each Deedee, pointing to another.

Once again, Janet found herself performing the official Willtopian mental shift. She accepted the unspeakable weirdness in front of her and focused on the purely practical. She turned to Sophie, who was still collapsed into an easy chair and drinking from a winged baby bottle. “Damn Sophie! You have a lot of diapers to change.”

Slowly and without enthusiasm, Sophie flipped Janet the bird.

“Urrr! Fine. Deedee, you all need a change. Get on that.”

One Deedee piped up. “Ooh, Will told me what to do!”

Another Deedee called out. “Oh, Butt-Wipe! Yoo-hoo!”

Another woman materialized, wearing a v-neck tank-top and a smile.

“Hello! Who needs a Butt-Wipe?” said the smiling woman.

Twenty hands eagerly shot up.

“My, there certainly are a lot of you! Don't worry, I have all the wipes and diapers you could possibly need! Who's first?”

Janet shook her head as she watched the grinning, brainwashed woman spread out a changing mat and break open the first of many poopy diapers she would change that night. This was what Will was turning the world into. Vapid, near mindless woman with smiles pasted on their faces and shit caking their rear ends, being wiped over and over til the end of time. Maybe humanity really would happier like this, but they would hardly be humanity. All the more reason to insure that the plan succeeded.

“Pardon me, ma'am?” said Missy. She looked incredibly embarrassed. “May be I be excused for a moment?”

“What? Why?” asked Janet.

Missy hung her head. “I have to, you know...”

“Just tell me!” said Janet, annoyed.

“Use the potty.” whispered the short, chubby woman. Janet laughed, remembering how she herself had felt just before Christine had forgiven her. In Missy's upside-down world, using diapers was cool and sophisticated, while being potty-trained was only for losers. It occurred to Janet that the nearest bathroom was in Sophie's room, just inside the hotel.

“Hm, maybe. Check me.” ordered Janet. It occurred to her that with Sophie indisposed, Missy was pretty much at her disposal.

Missy stuck two fingers into Janet's waistband. “You appear to be dry, ma'am.”

Janet laughed and turned around, waving her butt in Missy's face. “That doesn't prove anything! Get your nose in there and really sniff! Come on, panty girl!”

Missy seethed inwardly, but she couldn't refuse the order of any diapered woman. She knew full well that Janet was unquestionably her superior. She shoved her face into Janet's padded butt and inhaled deeply.

“You are clean, ma'am.” came the reply.

“Are you sure?” said Janet, smiling evilly. “Check again!”

Janet pushed, and felt a satisfying squelch as the seat of her diaper expanded around Missy's face.

“My apologies. Your diaper is quite stinky and full.” said Missy, more jealous than disgusted.

“Right! Let's get off to the nursery. You can change me, then deal with your own shit!” ordered Janet. She really liked having someone to boss around. She wondered briefly where Shelly had gotten off to.

The two women slipped through the crowds of happily chatting women. Clown-girls were juggling, friendly animals were either serving refreshments or being enthusiastically petted, and cheerleaders were doing gymnastics on the grass. There were still quite a few non-transformed women at the party, but Janet noticed that they were considerably fewer in number now than when the party had started. Diapers were now common enough in the crowd that she didn't feel a bit self-conscious about pushing through them with her recent “accident” wagging in the air behind her. When the pair reached the doorway to Christine's Nursery, they heard a frantic voice from within.

“Don't let the door close!”

“Oh dear, I'm sorry!” said another woman's voice. This one sounded familiar to Janet. Was that...

“Mom?” called Janet as she entered the Nursery. Inside was a young, blonde woman dressed as a superheroine, another dressed similarly but in a pair of Pull-Ups, and Janet's mother and sister, Sonja and Ashley respectively.

“Janet! I was so worried about you!” said her mother, running forward to embrace her. “Never go out of my sight again! Oh, honey, that diaper is so full! Hasn't anyone been changing you?”

Janet embraced her mother. “Yes, Mommy. I've been fine. You do remember that I've been on my own for a few years, right?”

Ashley cut in. “Yeah, we're a little fuzzy on that, actually. I remember going to your college graduation, but I also remember having to babysit you when I was in high school. Just eyeballing it, it looks like the version where you're a little pants-pooper was more accurate.”

“Don't you give Janet any trouble about her baby-pants, Ashley! Panties are a privilege, remember?”

“A what?” said Missy, confused. “Ma'am, perhaps you like to discuss this on the changing table?”

Sonja turned on Missy. “Sweetie, let me deal with this dirty diaper, okay? Why don't you go find some pants?”

Missy arched an eyebrow irritably. “I don't take orders from you!”

“Do what she says.” said Janet, resting her head on her Mommy's shoulder.

“Yes, ma'am.”  said Missy. Missy hated having to listen to anyone who wasn't cool enough to be diapered, but now she had no choice. Figuring that her best chance to find pants would be in Sophie's room, she headed to the door that led from the nursery to the hallway. The door was closed, however, and the superheroine was banging on it loudly.

“Hello. Can I please pass through? I am on urgent business!” Her bladder situation was indeed urgent, but more important was the task of finding pants, which a diaper girl had given her. That was clearly more important than whatever this non-diapered woman was up to. Missy wasn't sure where Pull-Ups ranked in terms of status, but since she herself wasn't wearing them, she didn't see any reason to rank them higher than panties.

“I'm sorry, ma'am” said Lady Happiness, trying to keep her voice under control. “It won't open! I don't understand how this is possible!”

Jasmine pulled on Lady Happiness's sleeve. “Lady Happiness, I...I don't have to go anymore.” She confessed sheepishly.

“Ohhh, don't worry honey. I'm sure you could have made in time if the this door wasn't locked. You'll get a fresh Pull-Up this time. No Failure Diaper, I promise!”

“I guess super-strength isn't one of your powers!” laughed Ashley.

“That's why its so odd! I should be strong enough to shatter a brick wall! But this door won't even dent, no matter what I do!” said Lady Happiness, clearly losing her cool.

Janet listened to this exchange as her mother wiped her rear and showered her with baby powder. If the exit was closed, it was probably Will's doing. That meant there were no bathrooms at this party now. Bad news for anyone unfortunate enough to be wearing big girl pants.

“Well, sorry Mom. It seems like you're stuck here. I guess you'll just have to suffer through the party like the rest of us.”

“This is a party? What kind?” she asked.

“The kind where a magic hummingbird leads you though a hotel and into a nursery?” asked Ashley.

“The kind that's thrown by an all-powerful pervert.” said Janet.

“Excuse me, can I use the changing table after you?” said Lady Happiness. “My Cadet had a little accident.”

“We heard.” said Janet. Her mother was just putting the final tape into place on a fresh diaper. It had an image of Cinderella across the front.

“It wasn't my faaaauuullt!” whined Jasmine. Technically, none of her accidents were her fault, but this time it was especially true.

Janet climbed off the changing table and allowed Jasmine to take her place. Another woman, this one wearing a professional blue pantsuit, ran through the door from the garden and crossed the room without speaking to anyone. She struggled desperately with the door knob.

“C'mon, c'mon! Open dammit!” she said through gritted teeth.

“You can't get out that way.” said Lady Happiness, carefully wiping down her faithful cadet.

“What! Oh gawd, tell me there's another bathroom! Will made me drink a weird baby bottle, and my guts are absolutely melting!”

Janet frowned. “Was there a...label of some sort on this bottle?” she asked.

Jillian was visibly struggling. “...Boom-boom” she said.

Janet's eyes popped when she considered the potential implications. “Okay, you need to be in diapers, like, right now!”

“No, please! Not that! Just a bathroom! Any bathroom! A house plant! I'm begging here!”
Janet smirked. She couldn't understand how anyone could object to the convenience of diapers.

Missy winced and began squeezing her legs together in an obvious potty-dance. How could anyone be offered diapers and just refuse?

“I'm sorry, sweety.” said Lady Happiness as she pulled a fresh pair of Pull-Ups up Jasmine's legs. “But I think she's right. That bottle you drank sounds a lot like what my sweet little Beverly drinks to keep her nice and weak. You'd be better off in a nice diaper for right now.”

Jillian's stomach made an audible gurgle. “Noooo! I'm just here to interview Will. I'm not supposed to...get...mixed up in all this!”

Lady Happiness set Jasmine back on her own feet. She looked disappointed that her Pull-Ups were once again bare of stars. “Come on, honey. You''ll feel better with a diaper on, I promise.”

Jillian pouted as the superheroine took her by the arm and gently pulled her onto the changing table. She sniffled as her shoes, skirt, and panties were pulled off and set aside. By the time the wiping, oiling, powdering, and taping up were done, she was crying openly.

“There, there! These aren't even Crybaby Diapers!” said Lady Happiness teasingly. Jillian had no idea what she was talking about, she just wanted to sink deep into the ground and never be seen again. When she finally had the courage to glance down at herself, she saw Beauty and the Beast dancing together on the front panel of her bulging diaper. She buried her face in her hands.