Chapter Two hundred four (Patreon)

“But what was he wearing when he transformed into a human?” Lianhua demanded, her pen scritch-scratching at the paper in her book. Raff was certain that she’d already asked that question, along with every other conceivable one, and from the look on Blue’s face, he was also mighty tired of answering. Still, he barely sighed before admitting that he still didn’t know, which just went to show that the kobold had a hell of a lot more patience than Raff had ever claimed.

Rolling his eyes, Raff reached down and patted the neck of his big bay stallion. It was a good horse, even if it had a bit of a hard mouth, and Raff would regret leaving it behind. All of the animals bore the brand of the King’s Guard, and it was also quite possible that once those bumbling idiots made their way back to Cliffcross, a mage would be able to track the beasts. Even without that, they were too well-trained and too obviously soldier’s steeds. Better to get rid of them as soon as possible.

He slanted a look at Chi Yincang, who clung to his saddle with the exact same look of suppressed dismay he’d been wearing for three days. The only time the other man looked like his usual self was when they stopped to eat or sleep. Raff would give a fair bit to know why someone like Lianhua’s bodyguard was afraid of horses, but he suspected it’d be more than his life was worth to ask.

A fallen tree caught his eye, and Raff grinned. The tree laid against a rock that pointed up at the sky very much like a rude gesture Raff had had to train himself not to use in front of his noble clients. His usual sort were rather rougher around the edges than these three. Two, now, he supposed.

“We’ll be at the Barrow soon,” he told them. “Just remember, let me do the talkin’, and don’t say anything.” He tilted a look toward Lianhua, who already had her mouth open to ask another question, and she clamped it shut again, lips going white.

Half a mile past the rock and tree, they met up with a deeply rutted dirt road. It was obvious that this had once been a well-used path, but now they were the only ones in sight. Raff pulled the hood of his cloak up around his head, and gestured for the others to do the same. Lianhua hadn’t been happy when he insisted on dragging her pretty cloak through the mud and pulled out a few of the hems, but it wouldn’t do to look too prosperous in the Barrow.

Not long after that, the sound of the horses’ hooves was met with a rather awkward owl hoot. The sun hadn’t even started to dip below the horizon yet, so Raff thought rather whimsically that a pigeon or crow call would have made more sense, but to each their own. He hooted back loudly, copying the no-particular-type of call the other had given. It sounded like something a city-dweller might think a bird would sound like, which was probably exactly what it was.

A figure stepped out in front of them, crossbow leveled and aimed straight at Raff’s chest. The broad, flat face, which looked like it had met the ground more often than not, was unfamiliar to Raff, and he breathed a soft sigh of relief. Then the first was joined by a second, and there was no way he could mistake the platinum curls that cascaded from her ponytail. The sides of her head were shaved, which was new, but he’d never met anyone else - besides Lianhua - with such naturally pale hair.

Ellie was holding another crossbow, though hers was smaller, almost delicate. She gestured with the tip of the bolt. “Hoods off,” she said.

Raff shook his head. He knew how this worked. It would be a little harder because Ellie knew his voice, but they hadn’t spoken in years, so if he just made a few alterations, maybe he could still get away with it. Would she respond better to someone she believed could pay well, or someone with whom she felt a sense of camaraderie? He snorted softly. It didn’t really matter, since he already knew what he had to do.

Holding up his hands, Raff swung one leg over the back of the horse, sliding down to land easily on his feet. “My dear lady,” he said, shifting the pitch of his voice into a higher register and allowing the accent of his youth to infuse his voice. “We’re simply here to do a little… business. If you’re not interested, do say so, and we shall be on our way.”

Ellie tilted her head, brown eyes narrowing as she tried to peer into the darkness within his hood. It was those eyes that had gotten him into trouble, once upon a time. Dark chocolate eyes beneath fair brows, and a dusting of golden freckles across the bridge of that rather imposing nose. She wasn’t beautiful, but she was more than striking.

“Who are you?” she demanded, gesturing again. This time, it wasn’t a ‘show your face’ motion, but a ‘come closer’ one.

He waved a hand, which was covered in one of his few pairs of plain leather gloves, lacking even metal bands across the fingers, or small spikes on the back. “This is quite tedious, madam. I was assured that those who, ah, work here could be, shall we say, discrete. For a price.”

Regretfully, he pulled the golden ingot he’d gotten from Blue out of his storage pouch and waved it at her before making it disappear again. All suspicion vanished in a blaze of pure greed, and Ellie took a step closer to him. Raff took an equal step back, keeping his chin tilted down, so his face remained in shadow.

“Whattaya want?” The first man’s coarse voice made the stallion shift uncomfortably, and Ellie returned to her place, a flush making her freckles stand out even more.

“We need to get rid of these beasts, for obvious reasons,” Raff said, waving at the horses, with their clear brands and bearing the trappings of the Royal Guards. “Then we need a small wagon, such as might be appropriate for, hmm,” he waggled his fingers as if thinking, “a lady of a certain standing.”

Sneering, the ugly man asked, “What standin’? You wanna look like toffs, do ye? Even I can see y’ain’t one.”

Raff barely managed not to laugh. It was funny that he had spent so many years pretending to be something he wasn’t, and then when he tried to be what he was, no one believed him. Instead of laughing, he managed a disdainful sniff, saying, “Then you should have your eyes checked, dear sir. But the cart is obviously not for me, as I am indeed no lady.”

Behind him, Lianhua choked, and Raff allowed himself a tiny grin. “The only point of contention, then, is whether or not you can do as I’ve asked,” Raff said. “I was assured that you could, but perhaps a mistake has been made, and I should take my business elsewhere after all.”

The man and Ellie exchanged glances, and Ellie stepped up again. “The only mistake you’ve made is thinkin’ that you’re walkin’ away with that gold. Lay it down on the ground, then take your friends and walk away. This is the only chance I’m givin’ you, an’ that’s only because you remind me of someone.” She shook her head. “Though how, I don’t know, ‘cause he was never such a ponce.”

Raff lifted a finger, and he could see from their reactions the moment when Chi Yincang pulled out his spear from his snazzy little storage ring. Now he could only hope that if the man had to start swinging it around, he didn’t manage to accidentally behead his gelding. Honestly, he knew that was unlikely, but the way Chi Yincang acted around the beast made Raff nervous.

“I think not. You get these lovely beasts, and all of their tack, and we get a cart. If it takes more than thirty minutes, we’re riding away,” Raff said, then took out the gold bar again and tucked it into the leather saddlebag hanging from his horse’s saddle. He closed the flap, gave it a pat, then stepped away from the animal.

Ellie hesitated, clearly torn, but her eyes were locked onto the saddlebag as if everything else had just faded away to nothing. “All right,” she finally said, lowering the crossbow and gesturing to her man. “Go on, Bear. Tell Lep we’re sellin’ his cart. Get it fancied up, best you can, and hustle it back here.”

Bear looked uncertain. “He won’t like it.”

Ellie spared him a brief glare. “Go.”

Bear went.

An awkward silence fell, but whoever broke it first would lose some contest of wills that Raff could sense would be dangerous to fail. Ellie’s weapon remained down, but he’d seen her use it, and he knew she could bring it up and fire a bolt in less than two seconds. The odds were good that whoever she hit would survive, but Raff didn’t really feel like hauling a foot of wood out of anyone today.

Time passed, and the sun crept inexorably toward the horizon. Raff watched it with grim resolve. The moon was barely more than a sliver now, and the night of no moon would be tomorrow, or, at the latest, the day after. He wanted to ask, but that would only make them stand out even more. Everyone knew exactly when no moon would occur, if only because they needed to know when to lock themselves inside their homes and pray to whatever gods claimed them.

Not a single word had passed between them when Bear returned with a cart and another man. The third man was a weaselly sort, small and twitchy, with bulbous blue eyes and lips that were far too thick for his pinched face. This, then, would be Lep.

“You can’t just take my cart, Ellie,” the little man said in a surprisingly deep voice. “I need it to take our, ah, goods in to market.”

Ellie waved at the horses. “We’ll have fine new steeds t’ carry our loot, Lep. Y’ just have t’ magic off those marks first.”

That made Raff feel a bit better. He’d heard there was an unlicensed mage working out of the Barrow, and hoped whoever it was would be strong enough to lift the magic out of the horses’ brands. Otherwise, they’d be butchered for meat, which was a terrible fate for such excellent beasts.

Lep turned to look at the strangers for the first time, almost as if he was surprised to see them there. He reached into a bag hanging from his neck and took out something like Raff’s lost darklenses, except that the circles of glass in these were clear, instead of smoked. He slid them over his eyes, which instantly grew to impossible proportions. Inch-long lashes blinked, and he said, “Oh.”

Everyone waited, and then Lep removed his lenses and tucked them away again. “All right then,” he said. “But it’s set up as a merchant’s cart, not a noble’s, ah, carriage.”

That was being generous. This cart was only good enough for a merchant if that merchant had fallen on some very hard times. The wood of the lower half was weathered and gray, while the canvas stretched over the top was a patched and faded yellow. The wheels looked solid, though, and the two horses pulling it might not be matched bays, but they looked sturdy and not too old.

Ellie stared into Raff’s hood challengingly, her lips curled. “Good ‘nuff, I think, for someone desperate enough to come here.”

Raff acknowledged her point with a dip of his head, then motioned for the rest of his party to get down from their mounts. They’d remained astride, ready to run, for the entire encounter. There was no doubt that if it came to a fight, Raff’s side would win, but while he was willing to kill if he had to, he saw no dishonor in both sides surviving to fight another day. At least as long as they wouldn’t be fighting him on that other day.

“A trade, then, madam?” he asked, bowing smoothly.

Ellie’s lip lifted a bit more, a barely concealed sneer, and Raff felt a little sad at the sight. The woman he’d known had been hard, it was true, but she had her own honor. He’d also heard her new name, ‘Two-faced Ellie’, and suspected he was about to find out how she’d earned it.

Reaching out, he smacked his horse on the rear, and the animal pranced forward a step, his eyes rolling to look back at Raff uncertainly. “Go on,” he said, and it walked on. The other two horses and the pack mule followed, until the stallion reached Ellie, where he paused again. She reached up and scratched gently at the animal’s cheek, and Raff felt his shoulders relax. She always had a weak spot for animals, though she’d kill a man as soon as look at him.

Quick as a wink, Ellie had the satchel open, pulling out the gleaming gold bar. It shone buttery yellow in the fading light, and her smile widened until all of her teeth were on display. “There y’ go, Lep,” she said offhandedly. Now you get t’ keep your cart, an’ these folks get t’ find what a crossbow bolt feels like when it slides through their guts.”

Lep’s grin matched hers, and even Bear smiled, though it twisted his flat, broken face in ways that were very uncomfortable to look at. Lep raised his hand, light already gathering in front of him, as Raff said, “Blue. Your turn.”

The light went out, leaving Lep gaping at his hand. Two bolts flashed through the air, and the hairs on the back of Raff’s neck lifted as they split and shot to each side of him. One struck each crossbow, and the two weapons burst into splinters, leaving Bear and Ellie with expressions matching Lep’s.

Raff circled the three bandits, watching for any of them to draw a backup weapon, or for the mage to do anything at all, but they were all too busy staring at the short, inconspicuous figure standing in the worn road. Blue’s hands were up, but when he saw that none of the three attackers seemed capable of doing anything, he dropped them rather uncertainly.

No one had liked Raff’s plan when he explained it over lunch, but the kobold needed to get used to such things. Raff, Chi Yincang, and even Lianhua were well used to facing human opponents, either in real battles or on the training grounds, but Blue still saw humans as something other, something strange and dangerous, and he needed to get over that right quick.

With an easy leap, Raff settled into the seat of the small carriage. Picking up the driving reins that Bear had looped over the seat, he kept his face turned away from the trio on the ground as he drove the horses forward. He was close enough and high enough that one of them could easily see his face if they looked up. They didn’t even try, though Bear and Ellie’s hands were beginning to drip blood into the dirt. For the sake of their past friendship, Raff hoped Ellie’s injuries weren’t too bad, but there was no denying she had brought it on herself.

As he passed, each of the others hopped up into the cart. Even young Kyla managed on her own, in spite of the fact that she was small even for a human child. Chi Yincang kept his black eyes fixed on the bandits as they faded into the distance, but none of them spoke until night fell.