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“You sure you don’t wanna come with us?” Kai called out, gently tapping on Leo’s bedroom door.

“No. Fuck off!” Leo snapped back.

“You sure we should leave him?” Kai asked quietly.

Miles shrugged and smirked a little as he said, “He’s still at ‘fuck off’. He’s really not open to conversation til he downgrades to ‘piss off’. He’ll probably be there within an hour or two!”

Kai sighed as he followed Miles to the stairs, walking down slowly behind him.

“Bye lads,” Mr Robinson said casually as he appeared from the lounge doorway and then disappeared into the kitchen.

Giving Kai’s dad a brief hello and goodbye, the two boys headed out of the house. As they reached the end of the driveway, Kai asked, “Is that really a thing? His whole fuck off or piss off thing?”

“I mean… it’s not like it’s foolproof, but usually, yeah. Why?” Miles asked curiously.

Kai pursed his lips thoughtfully for a moment before he replied, “It just feels like the sort of thing I should know!”

“Don’t beat yourself up. There’s definitely things Caleb knows about you that Leo doesn’t. It’s just… how it is!” Miles explained.

“Yeah, I guess,” Kai sighed, then suddenly looked at Miles with his eyes wide and glanced back towards the house to make sure nobody had followed. “Fuck!” he exclaimed, “So… what the fuck? Leo’s in LOVE with you?!”

Half an hour earlier, Miles had dropped that little bombshell, and while Kai had wanted to talk more about it immediately, Miles was reluctant to do so now that they knew Leo was around. They had gone out purely to get the space and privacy to discuss it.

“Yeah,” Miles sighed.

Kai looked at Miles expectantly and huffed in frustration as the other boy didn’t offer anything further. “Oh my god, seriously, if you don’t start talking…”

“Ugh, I dunno, it’s weird just even saying it aloud. I’ve never talked about it. Not even with Leo!” Miles explained.

“What? Then… how do you know?” Kai asked curiously.

“I just do. He’s even easier to read than you are!” Miles stated, being factual rather than insulting.

“So…” Kai started, then paused as he took a deep, thoughtful breath, “How long have you known?”

“I dunno. Years maybe,” Mile shrugged. He puffed out his cheeks and exhaled slowly before going on, “Although I guess that was mostly just… a suspicion. I’ve only been really sure about it for a couple of months now!”

“A couple of months,” Kai nodded, “So… around the time…”

“Yeah, all this dare stuff started,” Miles nodded as they casually strode along the road. “It’s been fun but it’s… changed some things!”

“Slight understatement,” Kai smirked.

Miles chuckled too, then glanced round at Kai curiously and said, “You seem surprised he’s into me, but not… that he’s into a guy!”

“Mmm-huh,” Kai hummed. “I don’t know anything for certain, but there’s been… hints!”

“You mean like the way he is CONSTANTLY trying to get himself into dares where he has to do things with me?” Miles asked, shaking his head a little.

“Hnnh, yeah, he’s… more obvious than he realises!” Kai sniggered.

“Mmm-huh, lot of that going around,” Miles said glibly.

“Hmm?” Kai hummed, missing the hint, “But also, you remember the, umm… the dick sucking dare he got?”

“Vividly!” Miles said, rolling his eyes. He had ended up tied to Kai’s bed for an hour.

“Kinda turns out that wasn’t even the dare!” Kai explained. As he got a shocked look from Miles, he elaborated, “I found the piece of paper. Don’t remember what it was exactly, but it was something about tickling. No mention of dicks!”

“Woah, so he literally made it up so he’d…” Miles started, then stopped, nodding. “Right, makes sense. Probably hoping he’d get me!”

“You’re REALLY that sure he’s into you” Kai asked curiously.

“First of all, fuck you for sounding surprised,” Miles said, only half joking, “But yeah, I am!”

“And you’ve never mentioned it to Leo?” Kai asked.

Miles almost choked he laughed so hard.

“You just… let him be into you and string him along?” Kai asked, suddenly feeling a little annoyed at the thought of it.

“Don’t fucking judge me!” Miles said defensively. “I had two options, tell him I know, or pretend I don’t!”

“And you chose the easy one,” Kai scowled, but quickly shook his head and said, “Sorry, sorry, just… protective. I know you wouldn’t hurt him on purpose!”

“No, I wouldn’t!” Miles insisted, “But consider the options. Option one would be telling him, and how would that go? Even if the whole thing about him liking a guy wasn’t an issue, what happens after that? I say I know he likes me and then, I have to tell him I don’t like him back in that way. That’d be awkward for ANYONE, but with Leo, fuck, you know how well he handles objection. He would LOSE it!”

“Oof, yeah, that’s a good point. That would not be pretty!” Kai winced a little, “So you go with option two… ignore it and hope it goes away?”

“Sort of. It was more a case of… trying to make it REALLY obvious to him that I’m straight and I’m into girls and I want a girlfriend!” Miles explained.

“Ohhhh, that would explain the terrible flirting!” Kai nodded.

“Terrible?” Miles mumbled, looking mildly offended.

Kai didn’t bother reacting to Miles’s mild annoyance. “But yeah, I get it, for Leo to catch on you’d have be really fucking obvious, so… makes sense now!” Kai nodded his understanding.

“I even tried to…” Miles started, but stopped blushing. Realising from the look Kai was giving him that he would have to continue now, he sighed and said, “I even TRIED to like him back. Y’know, I’m not exactly the most desirable guy and I had someone I REALLY like who was into me, so I thought about it, and really TRIED to like him in that way!”

“Ohhhhh,” Kai nodded again, “Was that why you did the whole… straight test thing with me?”

“Yeah,” Miles blushed. “I wanted to be sure, but I didn’t want to try it with Leo and give him the wrong idea and have things end up awkward between us!”

“Hey, hold up a sec!” Kai said as he stopped walking and grabbed Miles’s arm so they faced each other. He waited for Miles to look into his eyes and said sympathetically, “It sounds like you’ve been dealing with a lot, and all on your own too!”

Miles nodded silently.

“Well not anymore, okay,” Kai said with a meek smile, then held his arms out.

Miles looked around nervously. The street was empty but he was still anxious about being seen.

“Oh my god, get over it!” Kai smirked, pulling him into a hug.

“Thank you,” Miles sighed as he held gently onto Kai.

“Never a problem,” Kai said cheerfully as he pulled back. Casually leaving an arm draped around the other boy’s shoulders, he urged him to keep walking as he said, “Come on, we can go and laugh some more at Leo’s terrible plans to get his hands on you!”

“You’re such a dick,” Miles laughed as he walked with him.

*****

Monday had been a bit of a strange day. Luca had shown up early, so he could walk to school with the others, though he had split off from them as soon as they got near school and then spent the day keeping his distance, still not yet comfortable making Kai and the others, as he put it, “Potential targets for Vin and Fin.”

Leo and Caleb’s argument had been resolved with one of their classic tactics – don’t mention it and pretend it never happened! It technically worked, as they were back on speaking terms, though their snarky sniping at each other was worse than usual. Kai and Miles had chosen to stay out of it, as the two usually seemed to figure things out eventually.

Meanwhile, Kai couldn’t help noticing Miles’s behaviour now that he was aware of Leo’s attraction to him. He took every opportunity he could find to bring up the subject of girls, women, celebrities he’d like to meet and be rejected by. It might have actually been amusing had Kai not known what Leo must have been feeling every time he heard it.

Kai himself was as popular as ever, always seeming to draw a small crowd of sycophants who seemed to be able to talk about nothing other than social media. Excited as Kai was to see his follower account growing daily, he found himself just getting annoyed by the constant chatter about who was trending and what was cool on TikTok and any of the other things they seemed determined to make him care about. All Kai really wanted was to hang out with his friends and be able to sit next to his boyfriend in classes.

The evening had been a little better, as Kai had managed to get Luca alone anytime they passed a secluded spot for a bit of covert kissing, though it attracted a lot of teasing, eye rolls and the occasional bitchy comment from the others. Sadly, Luca couldn’t stay for the evening, but the other four had spent the night at Miles’s house, watching a movie with his parents before heading home for a rare night of all sleeping at their own houses.

Though there had been no further talk of dares, nor had Miles exerted his new control over Kai, as Tuesday rolled around everyone seemed to remember the dare that had been given. Both of the Robinson twins had been checked for their compliance with the ‘no underwear’ part of the dare. For Leo, that was as far as it went, and he likely wouldn’t experience any further issues until it came time to change for PE. For Kai, he had more to deal with.

With PE taking place in the final double period on Tuesdays, the boys had afternoon break right before it, which they had used to get him ready. Secreting themselves away in a rarely-used classroom, Miles had insisted on putting the buttplug in for Kai rather than letting him do it himself, his sudden and rather forceful insertion getting a yelp from Kai.

For Caleb’s part of the dare, he pulled out a rubber band and said, “I got you an extra small one!” It got sniggers from Leo and Miles. “I just thought if I got a bigger one and we had to double it over to make it tight enough it might catch on your pubes… if you still had any!”

“I have pubes!” Kai pouted as he snatched the band from Caleb.

“Yeah, like… three!” Leo smirked.

Kai seethed quietly at the comment but found it hard to really dispute it. He certainly had more than three, but regrowth from his plucking over the summer had been painfully slow and while he had a small patch, they were fair and blonde, rendering them virtually invisible from more than a metre away. Reaching down, he stretched the band and looped it around his cock and balls. His dick had already chubbed up to semi-hard during the course of their preparations, but he could feel himself getting fully hard just from touching himself. As he felt the tightness of the band, he felt like he got even harder than normal. The band itself, already close to his skin tone, almost blended in fully as it pressed into his fair skin, no more visible than his pubes.

“This is fucking stupid,” Kai groaned as he did up his trousers and looked at the unmistakable tenting.

“Oh, hey, look. You two finally look alike!” Caleb teased, pointing to Leo’s crotch, where his own dick, unrestrained by underwear, was also erect.

“It’s just… cos… not wearing underwear, it feels different,” Leo said, blushing as Miles and Kai exchanged a knowing glance.

As afternoon break was ended by the ringing of the bell, the boys along with the rest of Year 11 headed for the school gym’s locker room.

“Someone’s excited!” the boys heard in a derogatory tone.

Both still hard and painfully conscious of the conspicuous way they were carrying their bags in front of them, Kai and Miles both glanced round, only to find the comment hadn’t been aimed at either of them. It had come from Xavier Vincenzo, a.k.a. ‘Vin’ of the unpleasant duo ‘Fin and Vin’, and had been aimed at Zack Smith, a boy from another class that Kai and the others knew from their weekend football team.

“Piss off!” Zack replied, holding his bag in front of his crotch almost as conspicuously as Kai and Leo.

“And I thought only bender boy got that excited about the locker room!” Finley Watson (Fin) said derisively, nodding in the general direction of Luca who was already heading for his usual quiet corner.

“When exactly DID you develop such a strong interest in penises?” Miles suddenly called out.

The comment drew a range of gasps, followed by laughs.

“The fuck d’you say you little ginger tosser?” Fin snapped angrily.

“I guess hanging out with each other’s definitely a good sign you’re both fans of dicks!” Miles goaded again.

If the first comment had drawn laughs, the second had let rip a full-on uproar in the locker room. Both Fin and Vin, looking furious, started towards Miles but instantly Caleb and Leo were in front of him.

“Just fuckin’ try it, Watson!” Leo growled, the warning lost to most of the boys in the noise but not the two thugs who stopped in their tracks.

“THIS DOESN’T SOUND LIKE GETTING READY FOR PE!” Mr Hargreaves suddenly bellowed, walking in as he heard the din.

The boys quickly scattered and began changing, most of them chattering quietly about the brief confrontation.

Kai had started pulling off his blazer, shirt and tie while casting frequent looks over at his boyfriend. Luca never looked back, not even once. It was another one of those things he couldn’t unsee now he had seen it, the way Luca spent every moment of his day trying to remain inconspicuous and hidden and unseen. It made Kai’s chest ache to imagine how it must feel. Casually looking round, he spotted Zack Smith who seemed to be doing the same thing as Luca. Kai was shaken from his sympathetic musings by the feel of the tight tank top he pulled on. It was like a second skin on him.

“Maybe we should skip the dare,” Caleb said as his eyes darted back and forth between Miles, Leo and Kai. “Those two are totally gunning for us now!” he added, nodding in the general direction of Fin and Vin, though they were not visible, hidden by a row of lockers.

“No. Fuck ‘em. They wanna come for me, I’ll put ‘em in their place!” Leo growled.

Kai couldn’t help notice the way his brother’s gaze drifted over to Luca as he said it. Was he being protective of their new friend, looking out for his brother’s boyfriend or still working to make up for his own brief bout of bullying? It was hard to tell, but nice in a way to think Luca had someone else looking out for him.

“Yeah,” Kai agreed as he pulled his trousers down and stepped out of them, “They wanna be shitty to someone, then I can handle it!” He shrugged casually as he started squeezing the shorts up his legs, being careful to keep his buttocks clenched enough to conceal the plug.

“Nice ass!” “Going commando!” “Watch where you point that thing!” A group of boys behind Kai had seen his bare butt as he quickly changed, though their teasing was playful, lacking the obvious aggression Fin and Vin usually conveyed.

Kai blushed a little but gave the other boys a playful wiggle of his butt before squeezing the shorts the rest of the way up.

“Nice insults, by the way!” Leo said with a grin, offering Miles a fist-bump.

“I may not be any good in a fist fight, but I can read a bitch for filth!” Mile said proudly.

“I have… literally no idea what that means, but… yeah, nice job!” Caleb smirked, though his smile dropped into a look of shock as he glanced at Kai as he gasped, “Jesus!”

“Yeah, bulging a bit!” Kai said, blushing heavily as he glanced down. The last time he had worn the old PE kit, he had been spared the embarrassment of also having an erection as they had just been too tight to allow his dick to substantially swell. Today, having squeezed an already hard cock in, amplified by the plug and band, he was undeniably chubbed up.

“You look ready to hulk out of those things!” Miles sniggered.

“Nah, it’ll be fine,” Kai said hopefully, though the comment was accentuated by the sound of a slight crack, “It’ll be fine,” he repeated, even less convincingly.

As the boys headed through to the gym, with Kai’s kit/bulge drawing comments and teases from almost everyone and a disapproving headshake from Mr Hargreaves, the PE class got started. As usual, the lesson started with Mr Hargreaves’ usual warm-up – running laps of the gym until he could be bothered to tell them to do anything else!

Slowed by the plug inside him, the tiny shorts threatening to rip off at any time and the exciting jiggling of his bulging cock, Kai soon lagged behind most of the others, though Miles stayed at his side. As other boys began to lap Kai, he found himself subject to further teasing as a slap to his butt triggered a copycat gesture from every other boy that passed him. Soon enough, the rest of Year 11 had found themselves actually speeding up so they could lap Kai faster and give him another slap.

Most were gentle and playful, though both Vin and Fin took great pleasure in slapping his perky buttocks so hard the ‘crack’ echoed around the gym.

“Fuck, this might finish me off,” Kai panted, more from the sexual excitement than the exertion of running. Being the centre of attention, having his butt slapped, having something inside him and feeling the fabric rub against his swollen cock. All of it added up to a level of stimulation that was rapidly pushing him towards release.

“Kai, you can’t just shoot in the middle of PE!” Miles hissed back.

“No, I SHOULDN’T shoot in the middle of PE, but knowing me, I probably CAN!” Kai replied, seeming genuinely unsure whether he wanted the embarrassing moment to happen or not.

Thankfully, before Kai crossed the point of no return, Mr Hargreaves blew his whistle and called them all to gather. Sticking with his usual routine, Mr Hargreaves split the 123 boys into two groups – one to play football, the other to play basketball. As the two groups split down into teams to fill up the two indoor football pitches and two basketball courts, Kai was relieved to find himself not playing right away as it gave him a chance to calm down a little, though the decision to make the basketball teams ‘shirts’ and ‘skins’ definitely helped keep him aroused. Being able to sit and watch a small group of his schoolmates playing basketball shirtless almost made up for the fact he had been split up from all of his friends.

“Enjoying the show, fag?” a voice growled in Kai’s ear from behind as he sat on the bench spectating. He turned to see it was Fin, who had managed to remain with Vin despite most other groups/pairings in the year getting split up.

Kai’s brow furrowed as he turned his attention back to the basketball, ignoring the hateful thugs.

“Can’t believe the little homo’s just sitting there with a fuckin’ boner,” Vin growled, “Don’t know how Mr Hargreaves can let a freak be around everyone else like this!”

“He’s probably a fag too. You’ve seen the way he looks at half the guys in here!” Fin sniggered.

“Maybe that’s how Rob-boner-son gets away with it,” Vin said, sniggering at his own lazy nickname for Kai, “Bet he’s letting Hargreaves fuck him!”

“You kidding? You seen the shit he posts online. That little cockslut’ll let ANYONE fuck him!” Fin snorted.

Kai was trembling as he sat in front of the two thugs, getting talked about like he wasn’t there. This wasn’t like when the others talked about him during dares, that was enjoyable. This was… horrible. Kai almost cried, not so much for himself, but more for anyone else who was subject to it more frequently. He wanted to get up and march across to the footballers, grab Luca and just hug him and tell him he’d protect him from Vin and Fin and anyone else who ever wanted to be mean about him. He didn’t. He remained in place, getting increasingly angry and upset.

Thankfully, Kai only had to endure the hate for a couple of minutes before one of the basketball matches ended and he was called up to play in the next one.

“I reckon you guys are skins,” Vin said as he strode onto the court, looking at Kai and his teammates, “Shy Kai’s looking for any excuse to get his kit off!”

There were sniggers at the mocking nickname, but nobody really wanted to argue with Fin and Vin, so Kai and his four teammates pulled off their shirts and tossed them aside as they readied for a game of five-on-five. Kai felt so exposed as he stood on the court wearing nothing but socks, trainers and the tiny shorts. Despite the nastiness of two of his opposition, having so many eyes on him was exciting once again and the thought of possibly causing some erections made his own dick positively throb.

Kai was not known for being good at sports, mostly because he was not good at sports! It meant his teammates generally avoided passing to him whenever they could. It allowed Kai to avoid moving around too much, which was good as the sharp rapid movements that came from playing had the putt plug slipping back and forth across a sensitive spot that made him feel like he could shoot again.

“Jesus, has he got a wet patch?” someone asked from the sidelines. Nobody needed to ask who he meant.

“It’s probably sweat!” “That ain’t sweat!” “Oh my god, is he gonna blow?” “I told you he’s boned up and not just hung!” “Low key jealous!” “He’s got balls! Ha, get it!?” The comments only added to Kai’s distraction and reluctant excitement.

The more Kai moved around the court, the more he heard the gentle ‘pop’ and ‘crack’ of seams on his shorts straining to stay on him. Scared the back might split apart and accidentally reveal his buttplug, Kai started doing his best to move more carefully and as they neared the end of the match, and end of the lesson, his shorts remained mostly intact.

Suddenly, with very little time left, Kai found the ball flying his way. He caught it and looked round desperately. Seeing the other players charging his way, he froze for a moment unsure what to do. People were shouting things at him, but he managed to make out just one of them, a shout of, “TAKE A SHOT!”

Kai looked to the basket, lined up and jumped as he tossed the ball. Suddenly he was hit by a wall of bodies. He went flying, tangled up in them and as he hit the ground he heard a rip. As the opposing players jumped away, gasps began, soon replaced by laughs, joined quickly by cheers, jeers and taunts. Kai’s shorts had managed to rip in several places, likely with a little help from some opposing hands that he had felt pulling at him as he was unfairly tackled. While the elasticated waistband remained intact, very little else did. The sides and crotch had all split, revealing even more of his body and, more significantly, allowing his cock to spring free, completely on show as he laid splayed on the floor, his plump, smooth balls hanging heavily beneath.

“Oh my god!” “Kai’s got his dick out!” “Boner boy!” “That’s so embarrassing!” “Ha, no pubes!” “It looked bigger in his shorts!” “He’s enjoying it!”

The ruckus quickly drew the attention of the other basketball court as well as the boys playing football at the other end of the gym.

Dazed from being knocked to the ground and feeling like the world was collapsing in around him, Kai was only just beginning to think about covering up when he felt both of his arms get grabbed. He was lifted from the floor, presumably under the guise of ‘helping’ him, though really it just stopped him from covering up. The hands belonged to Fin and Vin, of course.

“SIR! KAI’S HAD A SLIGHT ACCIDENT!” Fin called out, despite the fact Mr Hargreaves was already fully aware, and on his way over.

“Robinson, what are you doing?” Mr Hargreaves demanded.

Kai winced as the laughter and howling continued around him, more boys from across the gym gathering to watch, including Leo, Miles, Caleb and Luca. “I don’t know, sir,” Kai whimpered.

“Let him go, I’m sure he can stand!” Mr Hargreaves huffed at Fin and Vin.

“Well part of him can!” someone shouted out, causing more uproarious laughter as Kai’s hands desperately clutched over his erection.

Mr Hargreaves sighed frustratedly as he said, “Go, get out!” He gestured to the door and added, “Wait outside my office when you get out!”

Kai nodded, red-faced, then glanced at his friends and remembered the final part of his dare – shower after class and ask at least five other people if they were doing it too! He started off towards the door to the locker rooms, conscious that the ripped shorts had ridden up a little now they were no longer held down by his crotch, putting the bottom half of his buttocks on show as he walked. Not wanting to fail the dare, he stopped. Already regretting it before he even said it, Kai called out above the noise, “Is anyone joining me in the shower after class?”

“Oh my god!” “Jesus christ!” “I kinda do actually! What?” “Pervert!” “That’s so funny!” “That’s so embarrassing!”

“QUIET!” Mr Hargreaves bellowed, “THAT’S DETENTION FOR YOU, KAI. GO STRAIGHT TO MY OFFICE! AND THE SAME FOR ANYONE WHO ISN’T BACK TO WHAT THEY’RE MEANT TO BE DOING IN FIVE SECONDS!”

Kai whimpered at getting detention and carried on towards the exit. As he stepped out into the hallway, he headed straight for Mr Hargreaves’ office and stood beside the door. As he stood waiting, he attempted to salvage the shorts. His attempts were ultimately pointless and only served to stimulate himself so he stayed rock hard. The coldness of the hallway made him shudder and he wished he had been able to pick up his tank top, not that it provided much in the way of cover or warmth, but still being clad in just the ruined shorts felt horribly exposing.

When the bell rang, the boys started piling out of the gym and once again Kai was subjected a constant stream of laughs and taunts as they headed past him and into the locker room. Mr Hargreaves appeared about halfway through the group and glared angrily at Kai. As he got closer, he growled, “I meant AFTER you get dressed!”

“Oh, sorry,” Kai said as he started to move.

“No you don’t,” Mr Hargreaves said instantly. “I’m not having you going in there and causing more commotion,” he said, gesturing to the locker room that the last of the boys were now heading into, “Sit down in my office. I’ll be in shortly!”

“Yes sir,” Kai said sheepishly as he went into the office and shut the door behind him. He sat down in the chair facing Mr Hargreaves’s desk then looked down at his still hard cock. “No… don’t!” he said to himself, shaking his head as a thought occurred to him. Still being hard when the teacher came in to, inevitably, admonish him would be humiliating and there was little chance of his cock going down on its own any time soon. Cumming might be the only way to get rid of it, but did he have time? Having been on edge for much of the afternoon, he felt like it wouldn’t take long. He reached down to pull the elastic band off and tossed it aside, then wished he could take the plug out, but he had nowhere to conceal it, so it stayed in as he took hold of his dick and started stroking.

It felt instantly incredible. Thinking about being exposed to all of Year 11, about his walk of shame out of the gym, about the teacher seeing him naked and hard, about the 100+ boys just two doors away getting changed. All of it added up to a truly thrilling wank, which thankfully also meant it was quick.

He had been stroking for less than a minute when he felt himself ready to blow and it was only in that moment he realised he hadn’t even considered where he would shoot! The shorts were barely there, and certainly not enough to absorb a massive load. There were no tissues. He didn’t have time to get a sock off. Shooting over himself might mean talking to Mr Hargreaves while covered in spunk, and he certainly didn’t want that! Jumping to his feet, he stopped stroking to give himself time to think, but it was too late. The plug, the excitement, the rapid wank, it pushed him too far and he knew he was going to shoot!

“Okay, now…” Mr Hargreaves started as he opened the door.

Kai turned to face him purely on instinct, just as his cock began spurting up its load. He was frozen in place as his dick throbbed and bounced and sprayed. Mr Hargreaves was frozen too, looking absolutely bewildered.

Facing a teacher who looked like he didn’t know whether to laugh or shout, Kai gasped his way to the conclusion of his orgasm, gave a timid grin and said, “Sorry, I thought you wanted me to cum to your office!”

Comments

Naked Justice

Hopefully Mr Hargreaves gives Kai what he wants and makes him attend the next PE classes in classic green style naked... Really, very embarassing. I envy my name twin for this humiliating experience of exposure.