Wish for Gilded Gold (Creeping Ojou Coin Tg) Draft (Patreon)

Jalira: Hello again, genie Jalira coming in from the Nagisa’s wish opportunity journalist service, welcome to the show. As you all know the highest of high priests of the goddess Nagisa recently had gotten the opportunity to climb what was essentially japanese mount olympus to meet up with their goddess in person to ask her a wish to change the world they are living in for the better in exchange for their humanity… and also their manliness from what I can tell.

Today I have a very special guest with me to interview who had an opportunity to make a wish like that. Please, introduce yourself~

Roze: Oh, glad to be here today, Jalira~ My name is Roze and you could say I am doing just golden~ Ohohoho~

Jalira: I can see that. When Nagisa said that a lot of you people were going to be extravagant, she was not joking. Now, I have prepared a few questions for you that our watchers are certainly eager to hear the answers to. Would you be okay with answering them for me?

Roze: Certainly~ It’s not like I have any trademarked secrets I need to hide~ Ohohoho~

Jalira: Perfect~ Alright, so the first question would be: To gain your wish from the goddess you had to reach the top world temple, which required a hike up to a pretty tall mountain. How did you do that and was it hard?

Roze: I can tell you that much, it wasn’t easy. I think every one of us took a different approach up the mountain. But I am going to be honest and say that I had a pretty big advantage this time around. Which allowed me a strategy that I would not have taken otherwise.

Jalira: Oh? What advantage would that be?

Roze: I know someone close to Nagisa pretty well, and he just happened to let slip that I would gain a wish the moment I would get up there. That allowed me to think of a wish before that and come up with a strategy.

Well, from all of my planning and strategizing, I settled on gaining money more than anything else. I don’t remember my exact reasoning, but I think I just wanted to be rich at least once in my life. And I gotta admit, its pretty damn awesome, not gonna lie~ Ohoho~

Jalira: I see. But how did that help you climb the mountain?

Roze: Well I knew I was going to get my money back, so I was pretty much free to spend my life savings going up the mountain. I was talking to a few pro hikers and even a few local residents who were well informed, but I just settled on taking a helicopter ride up to the top world temple. It was honestly surprisingly cool and also the reason why the first thing I did as a creeping coin was buy two private helicopters.

Jalira: I… see. Your logic does indeed make sense. Okay, now to the main event why most people have turned in: What was your wish and what changed?

Roze: I hope most of you have eyes and can see my shiny new beauty~ Ohohoho~

Jokes aside, I actually had to reword my wish a few times before we settled on something. See, the problem just was that Nagisa would only grant wishes that are big enough to affect the whole world. Me wishing to be the richest person on earth, is, funnily enough, not big enough. After all, many people live perfectly contempt without even knowing who the richest person before me was. It just isn’t important.

In the end, I wished “that I was in control of all the money in the world.”, as that was something that was something that was sure to affect most people in the world.

Jalira: And what are some of the major changes that happen to you because of that?

Roze: If there ever was a personification of “Mrs. Moneybags”, then I turned into her without a doubt. First off, my skin turned into gold. Not just a skin tone, I turned into genuine living gold, meaning my body became a whole heck of a lot heavier in the span of a minute. To make it even more fun, my weight was also greatly redistributed, with a lot going to my chest for the real money bags and a lot more going to my behind, because I apparently really needed the counterweight.

Oh yeah, I might be making a lot of weight jokes, but what people don't realize when they look at me like this, is that I most likely weigh more than their car. Turns out that if you turn a human sized person into a material about twenty times as dense as they were before, then stuff also happens to their weight. Though I have come to terms with it quite a long time ago and also find exorbitantly hilarious when someone tries to pull on my arm to drag me somewhere, only to realize two seconds later that pulling on me is like trying to move a car with their bare hands. Ohohoho~

Jalira: Interesting. And how did your wish affect the world around you?

Roze: The world was altered to a point where I was officially deemed as the most valuable and important being on the planet. Everything my body produces is pure gold and I can mold it into whatever I like. So humans have started to worship me as a literal goddess of money, as they have decided to only use money produced by me as currency all across the world, as it was the only kind of coin that could literally not be manufactured by anyone other than myself.

So it was impossible to forge. And because gold is also the most rust resistant material on the planet, there literally was no better currency to use than my offshoots. Which I can produce thousands upon thousands of each day.

Though as funny and ironic as it might sound, if you get requests to purchase something from literally every country on the entire planet to stir up their economy on a daily basis, it could be said that I am actually constantly in a money shortage. Which just cracks me up every time I think about it. Ohohoho~

Jalira: That is quite funny, I will not deny that. But with that, our interview is coming to an end. Is there anything you would like to say to the audience before we conclude this interview?

Roze: Remember kids: Love with your heart, use your gold for everything else~ Ohohohoho~

Jalira: Thank you very much for the interview today, Roze! It was an honor meeting you today. This was Jalira, from the from the Nagisa’s wish opportunity journalist service, thank you for tuning in and I’ll see you all… next time~

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If you could gain a wish from the dark goddess, but only if it is big enough to drastically affect the entire world, what would you wish for?