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I walk down the steps leading out from our apartment complex, we live in the city but not IN the city if you catch my meaning. Its a easily a good 20 minutes to the city proper.

I didn't wanna go there, thoughts of its stench makes me wince.

The afternoon breeze catches my fur, its a cool day but not cold, the wind rustled up my collar moving it about, feels good man.

I haven't decided what to do yet, I've been hungry for ages, Maybe find some food?

My eyes dart around, each movement an interest.

It occurs to me that I don't know how to get food.

Bridget has my food and she brings it home with her, where does she get it from?

I ponder this I as walk, ignoring the occasional weirdo this city seems to have everywhere. Who make kissing noises at random passerby's?

Turning a corner I'm spotted by a child.

She runs over shouting something in a high-pitched tone. The mother leaning on a wall jabbering to another.

Now I'm pretty damn proud of my looks I'm not shy of admitting that. it's likely those wierdo's were just trying to let me know they appreciate me, that's fair.

But this child was going way too far in this affection.

The babble of piercing squeals set my ears flat to my skull, I do not like these situations!

I try to reach out to the mother;

"Hello?"

No answer.

"Excuse me, miss?"

She glances my way momentarily and turns back to her friend.

The girl start's patting my chest how, a little too hard.

I've never been good with kids. Especially with their sticky hands and no regard for personal space.

"Hey, control your child woman!" I shout.

I try to walk away but the girl follows me, stroking my back intently.

I really can't stand this, I hate being touched like this. Why isn't she getting that?

What signals could I be giving off that could possibly mean to her I want to be assaulted?

I try one last time, a final warning. "Hey back off kid." I snarl

This stops her for a moment, she looks back and yells something at her mother. I make my escape.

My tummy gurgles, as I reach the place where the food is, a shop? I think I've been here, it feels familiar.

Looking in through the window I was grateful to be right. There is food here, plenty of it. More than I could possibly eat.

It's arranged in rows behind a glass case.

I'm not sure I understand this set up, how do you get at the food?

I pat my pockets for some reason, no not the pocket, that's probably inappropriate, the one's in my Jeans. What am I looking for?

I press a hand against the glass.

"Excuse me sir!" yell out at a man in overalls chopping food behind the counter

He turns to face me and his eyes light up.

Ah good, I've got his attention. Finally someone who speaks English.

I look down at the slab of raw beef in front of me.

"Yeah, I would like some of this, how do I...?"

How do you get the stuff you want?

Does something need to be traded?

Surely I can't just take it? He needs something?

Ugh my head hurts, too many questions today.

He seems happy at least, that's something.

He doesn't make those kissing noises either, someone polite, bonus!

He swings back around cutting at something, the fresh smell of blood and meat set alight to my senses.

He comes out from behind the counter dangles a twisting tangle of fat and gristle.

Part of me recoils in disgust but most of me is mesmerized.

I guess I do just take then?

I point again at the slab of meat behind the glass and tap it for emphasis.

"...and this one too?"

He drops his offering on the floor and smirks at me, before returning to whatever he was doing.

My stomach roars and I'm feeling faint. Buzzing in my ears starts a dull headache.

I can't have that!

It's on the floor! It's dirty.

Who knows what's trodden on this floor?

Rational voices in my head try to hold back the buzzing in my head but its a losing battle and they grow quieter.

I convince myself its probably fine, its not THAT much worse than eating off of the kitchen table at home? I wonder to myself chewing furiously at the mouthful of heaven Totally worth it.

It's only when I'm done that I notice a few people outside peering in, phones out.

I thank the guy and walk out.

They must be impressed by my fur, who wouldn't be? I did look especially good in the sun it has to be said, there's practically a gloss to it, catching the deep dark and the warm browns nicely.

Maybe it's because I've eaten but I'm way more comfortable getting attention now.

One girl, older than the previous and taller than me runs a hand down my nose and that rumble starts again in my throat, more audible now. My happy noise.

I could stay, I could receive praise and spend hours bathing in it, but I came out to get away from rest. I get enough rest. I wanted to see that roof and that tree.

I parted politely from my fan's and gave one girl another stroke, she looked like she appreciated it.

As I walked I had to re-adjust my cord, had it come lose?

My pants slipped down as I caught them.

I tried pulling them back up but they kept catching on something.

With an awkward motion I reached around to feel at the spot in question.

What was it? A lump?

It isn't a lump, well I guess it is.

Just a little bit extra of me that I never got removed. It never annoyed me before though. Maybe this is why I stopped wearing pants?

It wiggled a bit at my attention feeling muscles in my back move that I've never really noticed before.

Huh I can move it? That's cool, I wonder what that's for?

I lift my Jeans over and pull the cord tight around my waist again, the band of my Jeans tenting on my ass.

I admire myself in the window again and consider taking my shirt off to feel the breeze on my chest.

I opt instead just to pull down my collar some more.

I made my way back to the apartment stopping at the tree I could see from the window, I resist the urge to follow the squirrel that darts madly away from me as I approach.

Walking today has been nice and I feel loads better having done it but I'm not sure I'm all that healthy. I should stretch more.

All through today my body has been making odd clicks and noises especially in my joints.

I stretch out my feet in the grass, feeling them pop in a few places.

I should really get more exercise.

My pants slip down again and I sigh frustrated.

I'm gonna have to get a proper belt if I'm gonna keep wearing these, this cord is shit.

Thankfully there's no one around now, it's quiet and in this patch of park it's far away enough from the cars that's they're not deafening.

I focus on the tree. Feeling my ears move with the effort, watching, listening for those tiny movements that go against the flow of the wind.

The ones that speak of small hands and tiny feet moving about on thin wiry branches. The flutter of wings and the actions of small mammals.

I feel at peace for a moment just watching. I sit in the grass cross-legged and stare up.

I still don't know why I find this so interesting, its like a need of mine, an addiction but still sated from that meal I had I was a bit more docile.

I lost track of time, I may have napped at one point I sort of come to my senses with my head in the grass still watching the tree super zoned out.

I yawn.

I've been out here for a while, I'm so tired.

I push myself up, the sun is low in the sky.

Wow must've been out longer than I thought.

The apartment is within eye sight so I amble over there in no time.

At the door I'm a bit stumped, it's closed.

Granted thats quite a normal state for doors, but that was the problem with this one. I need it to be open. I stare blankly at it.

It's not opening on its own clearly.

Thinking, I remembered that I had to push it open on my exit, so it stands to reason that I should pull at it.

That did nothing either.

I bang on the door, nothing.

A low grumble resonates in my throat.

There's a bunch of things next to it, some are lit up, some have weird squiggles on them. Door bells?

I tried pressing them at random and felt several sink in and was combined with an awful sound.

More awful sounds now, like they are twisted distorted jabbering from the speaker

I figure they must be people though it could be a chorus of zoo animals for all I can hear.

One of them I recognize though. It's Bridget!

Her voice lights up one of the buttons and I press it in again.

"Helloooo?" She say's

"Hey?" I speak into the door

"Ooooh little Braddie! Where have you been? I've been worried sick!"

"Just outsi..." I start but the sound dies from her end.

Lights turn on and Bridget comes flying out the door and pulling me inside.

"Are you ok?" she says caressing my face.

"Yeah, fine. Why?" I say a little alarmed by her.

my eyes squinted, she cups both hands to my face.

"You were out so long, I was worried something happened." She said teary eyed.

"What do you mean, what could've happened?" I ask

"Oh it's just...You know...You're alone and...well I'm just glad you're back." She said wiping her nose. "There are some nasty things out there at night."

"You shouldn't stay out too late." She scolded me.

"Uhhh...." I say " Um ok?" I didn't like seeing her like this. Clearly something had scared her.

"You promise?" She asked

"Y...yeah, sure I promise."

Bridget cheered up when we got back home. I was glad to let my jeans fall off properly now, if I'm honest I'm not sold on them.

They were pretty awkward today. Besides that "smaller" shirt I got this afternoon seems to be stretching out already so I may as well go back to my old stuff.

Still always good to have clothes I suppose.

Oh wow, though. That light fuzz I had this morning really filled in!

Creamy white fur all over my lower face, framing my nose. That's great!

What a difference that makes too, I look more angular, sleeker, hotter?

Yeah definitely more attractive. Chicks dig a good full beard, I have a proper one now.

I feel that tingle again, damn it I can still smell Freya, I cant get her out of my head.

Bridget nails dinner again tonight, with my favorite, I guess I'm not picky though, fresh juicy tuna is hard to fuck up.

Cutlery was insufficient today, maybe it's the walk and I've worn myself out but my hand kept cramping up holding the fork.

I try stretching it out a bit, wiggling my fingers but nothing changes, the skin bulges strangely when I grip the fork. Is my palm thicker?

Chris comes in at some point but I barely notice him these days since he pays me no mind, I think he was at work? Meh who cares. I finish my meal, choosing to just use my tongue.

Bad manners I know, but Bridget doesn't seem to mind.

Of course she doesn't.

I thank her for my meal and spare Chris a glance as I walk by him on the sofa.

He rubs head as I pass and I'm left a little speechless.

Is this contact?

It's progress I suppose, it's best not to press it further.

I acknowledge his affection, giving him my best version of a thumbs up, he knows what I mean.

He smiles, I smile

That's all that's needed.

Climbing in to bed tonight I rub at my face feeling the comforting softness there, It really did grow in fast, is that normal? I know people can grow beards in a couple day's if left unshaven.

I bury my fingers in it, its soft and thick but not long.

My inspection irritates my whiskers and I sneeze.

Meh, its probably normal. I've heard of stranger things.

My bed is warm my body glows with calm. There's that tiredness again, at least now I have an excuse for it.

Images flash in my mind of the tree and the birds, that was nice. maybe I should go again, though not so late.

My eyes close.

I'm asleep as soon as my head settles.