Diary of my Footboy #Mindfucked- Part 2 (Patreon)

Hello everyone!

Here is the next 2 days from foot boys diary.... Unedited.... The following words are unedited and are presented to you how they were presented to me...

Day Two – Tuesday

Have been at work today so not had as much opportunity to focus on what’s coming as I did yesterday, but it’s still been on my mind. Still really excited about it, thinking of what might be coming and also looking ahead in a ‘this time next week…’ kind of way, like waiting for a holiday.

And what exactly will be happening to me this time next week? I can only guess! Mistress has said she is going to mindfuck me, and really made it sound like it’s going to happen over the day in the build up to second session. Wow! If this is the case it makes me think that she won’t make me forget it this time; she’ll want me fully aware of the effect that she has created as we countdown towards the second session. But I can’t be sure! In equal measure I love the thought of going through the day knowing exactly what is happening to me and having no option but to go with it, or to be mindfucked so that my reality is what Mistress has made it without me knowing.

Also that’s if it does only last around that particular time – Mistress said it might perhaps last through Wednesday and the rest of the week! This could have been another mindfuck and she is just toying with me. I’ve learned that there are many ways Mistress can fuck with my mind and it doesn’t have to be just making me forget a session. If that really is something she would do to me…my god. To go through the whole week…every time I spoke with her or saw a picture it might affect me. I really do love that thought and it being a possibility…feeling Mistress’ imprint on me is wonderful.

I think up until today I have been thinking of these two sessions as separate – yes they would lead into each other, but they would be much like our last three only one after the other. I see that isn’t the case now. Mistress has planned and crafted these sessions, and the time in-between, as a whole two-day hypnotic experience. And from what she’s said I will be so under and open to her for the duration of it. I really can’t express in words how much that appeals to me. I think about how open I am to her already, and my mind just boggles wonderfully if that is only going to get more profound.

Day Three – Wednesday

At the beginning of today I was expecting it to be like yesterday with me being at work again, but it wasn’t.

As I was heading to work I started chatting with Mistress, and within a few messages I just felt so incredibly positive and happy and boosted, ready for the day and anything it would bring. Chatting with Mistress always makes me happy, but this was even stronger, I could feel that she was proud of me and it just made me so confident for what was coming. I must have been sat there absolutely glowing! The new things I was doing at work didn’t seem daunting at all…almost felt like Mistress was there with me, her effect keeping me safe. How sublime it felt.

Later on we got chatting a little bit about the nature of submission, and it was…inspiring. As I started thinking about my responses it made me reflect on the steps we’ve taken together in our journey, and the ones we have still to come. Being Mistress’ foot boy and submissive is incredibly important to me and I value it enormously. It is a source of joy, of inspiration…it’s something in which I can fully be myself and gives me the confidence and focus to be that best version of myself. It’s also incredibly pleasurable and stimulating and so much more! Because of all this I always want to do my best to make Mistress proud of how I am doing under her guidance. I think she could tell I was feeling reflective as she asked me a question of that nature while we were discussing it.

Not long after that she started playing with me a little, while I was still at work, and bloody hell it was so good. I talked before about how open I am to her…I’m always just one word away from feeling her power over me in one form or another, but she got me good with this. I felt her feet pressing into my face as I have so many times now, the hypnotic embrace of her soles and for a brief moment everything just melted away and all that was there was the bliss, safety and serenity of that feeling. And then…and then she told me her feet own me completely now. That washed right over me, I felt it in every fibre of myself. And it’s true, they do. Mistress does. As I was at work I stayed much more grounded than I would have had I been alone and in a position to savour those words and their effect, but I still felt their effect so strongly, and it happened so easily.

Whether Mistress started triggering me at work as some sort of ‘rehearsal’ for the effect of the sessions on me next week, or just because she has fun toying with me, or both, I don’t know. The way she can mindfuck me can just be something as simple as making me wonder about that. She had me feeling pretty drifty already and as soon as she established I was still at work she increased her grip, bringing me even deeper under her feet…and being under her feet is synonymous in my mind with many things now, including trance. I could hear the soft whisper of her voice telling me that, and I drifted further into her scent in that blissful way. I thought about them closing gently around my face when she triggered me, of my mind drifting away into them. Feels blissful to recall even now. I also didn’t think that Mistress would hit me with the erotic trigger while I was at work…but I was wrong about that!

In a way I guess I felt it more keenly as I had to try and contain it more than I would in private...I just love how powerful and undeniable Mistress’ effect on me is; if she chooses to make me feel like that then it will happen, no question. So exciting to be so open like that. And I derive pleasure not just from what the actual trigger makes me feel but from the fact that Mistress has now made it a part of me; it’s implanted so deeply for her to use whenever she wishes. That’s…so wonderful.

The pleasurable sensations combined with the positivity from chatting with Mistress before left me feeling great for the rest of my shift and going into the evening. Like before I must have been sat there just glowing as everything from the day ran through my mind. And it all just delightfully snowballs – the effect itself lasts but thinking about it also keeps it fresh in my mind and brings it back to me, much like the effects of the custom track and everything else Mistress has given me. I’m so lucky.

Mistress played with me a bit more later on in the evening; she brought me under her feet again and I think I sank quite deep until the pleasure she gave me brought me back to reality a bit. As time went on I felt a strong urge to write and tell her how I was feeling and how everything was affecting me, and it started to feel really good to do so, really pleasurable. I always enjoy writing and expressing how she makes me feel but this was more…defined…must have tied into the feelings from earlier when she said she was proud of me and encouraged me to express. As I thought about it more I began to wonder whether I was inspired to express the feelings or whether Mistress has actively suggested it, though I know she’d never say so even if that was the case. Really made me think too how blurred the line is now between my own thoughts and ideas and where her influence on me really starts. Again it is something she would never say, she would always leave it to rattle around inside me, and I love that dearly…it is so much fun and so right for it to be this way, belonging to her as I do.

And that’s how she can mindfuck me, in some ways it must be pretty effortless for her when I start expressing to her. Has she inspired me to do this or actively suggested it? Where do my own thoughts end and her influence begin? I don’t know, I can’t really answer. All I can do is think about it and wonder. The mindfucks can be much more subtle than making me forget something she’s done to me, she can make me question what’s in my own head. I always have the urge to write about being mindfucked – even if (as is usually the case) I can’t define it or even think of something proper to say, just to express…to let her know how my mind is working in response to something, if it is really working at all. She can just drop one suggestion or ask a single question that makes me doubt something I myself did or said…what a powerful influence that is, and how great it feels to be subject to it. This is not to say at all that I don’t enjoy all this happening, I love it. It represents how deeply engrained Mistress is in my head, and how easily she can influence me. Writing this now has been much the same, not really being able to define anything properly – but then how can you define something like that? How do you define what you don’t really know? Of course when it happens that doesn’t mean to say I can’t form my own opinion of it, like if she asks whether or not I did something I can always surmise as to if I did or not, but I can never really know.

So much has happened today I felt the need to document it bit by bit as much as possible. Having written all this now I again have to wonder if this is some sort of way Mistress is preparing me, even softening me up, for the mindfucks that will be coming during the two sessions. They are on the horizon and getting closer, and she might well be playing a longer game with me.

I hope you enjoyed this installment of the diary... next installment will be published Wednesday 24th Feb! 

Chanel x