Selfportraits (Patreon)

The issue of "sexuality" has been actively raised in my life. I am troubled by my rejection of this part of the human manifestation. Not even like that - I want to show myself sexually, but I seem to sabotage this process and make a joke out of it.

These photos are almost a year old. This is the first shooting in which I decided to use underwear in self-portraits in order to achieve that desired sexy vibe (which I have been running away from in my photography for so long). It seemed to me that I managed to photograph what I had failed to capture before. But now I look at these pictures and see just a frightened girl who does not know what to do and how to do it.

Just a couple of days ago, I dug into myself again on this topic, watched this shooting and understood my fear and prejudice about sexuality... Do not look for that logic - but here is my conclusion -

Due to the fact that I don't even know what it's like to be sexy - I'm afraid to express myself sexually (as I imagine it) because I'm afraid of the ridicule of others. It turns out that I'm just afraid to even try, but why I don't understand at all. It's like I'm sabotaging this process myself - when I even try to express myself sexually, I turn it into a joke.

It seems to me that I am missing a large range of emotions in my life because of this prejudice. But I'll deal with it) In the meantime, you can look at my failed display of sexuality in the photos)))

And by the way, I'm interested to hear from you - what is sexy for you in a woman?