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Emotional Dysregulation (Patreon)

Published:
2019-10-20 23:02:10
Imported:
2021-08

Content

I’m prone to strong, sudden flashes of emotions. When I’m trying really hard and feel like I’ve ‘failed’ at something, I get so angry at myself that I start crying. This has been the norm for me since I was a child. After having my stepson Collin in town for the summer, I recognized so many of his behaviors. Crying when he couldn’t do something right. Jiggling in his chair constantly. Unable to control how loud he gets. I started this Venn diagram months ago and just rediscovered it recently. Wanted to share to see if you experience things the same way?

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Comments

Anonymous

I've been working on mindfulness and meditation and changing my self talk for several years now. And yet just the other day, I was shocked at how close to the surface my anger was with my teenage daughter. One second I was, if not happy, calm and stable. The next moment I was in her face screaming at the top of my lungs. I still can't perceive a particular trigger or period of transition. It feels awful.

Anonymous

Swap out leg bouncing for impulsive snacking and you’ve basically profiled me.

Anonymous

Oh, yes, all so familiar!

Anonymous

I could see myself in this graphic including the bouncing leg. My wife calls it “tapping” - “Lisa, your tapping again” or “Stooop” 😂😂

Anonymous

Excited/Anxious/Frustrated: my daily experience! What’s great here is the new phrase for me, ‘emotional dysregulation’ and the interaction of the parts of the diagram. Thank you. Concerning the ever simmering, but generally un-noticed anger at myself, I can trace that back now, thanks to therapy, to an individual in my childhood - I’ll leave you guys to guess who that might be and the clue is I’m a bloke! Oh, and, for me anyway, I’m learning something new which is that in my life, there’s an important difference between on the one hand episodes of anxiety and my excitement and on a the other hand, my moments of frustration. The origin of my frustration seems to be related to behaviours I developed in response to my environment when a kid - I’m told these are called ‘unconscious scripts’ in TA. So, my anxiety and excitement are definitely about ‘now’. My frustration and the associated anger that appear from nowhere when I ‘fail’, are most definitely tied up with the anxiety and/or excitement ‘now’, just as described here by you Dani, but their origin is not in the moment, but, for me at least, they are infuriatingly (!) also tied up with behaviour stuff I seem to have picked up from the environment my parents created for me as a kid. The latter discovery is proving helpful. Your diagram equally so, thank you!

Anonymous

I experience the way everything slides (quickly in my case) to Overwhelm. I am overwhelmed a lot of the time. Recently I’ve been asking my (mostly neurotypical) friends how often they feel overwhelmed. None of them feel overwhelmed on a regular basis. And for me it’s daily. We do deal with a lot don’t we?