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Eclipse, The Character Assassination Of Jacob (Patreon)

Published:
2020-09-15 05:48:37
Imported:
2022-01

Content

Sorry this one's right up to the wire again. These Twilight reviews are getting a bit... Exhausting.

Files

Eclipse, The Character Assassination Of Jacob

Comments

Diego Valdes

It has been so many years since I read this book or seen the movie. I spent the entire synopsis portion of this cringing. I forgot how bad it was.

WillRigby

You ain't seen nothing yet The Dominic Smith

Ashley Laduranteay

Worst birthday present ever. Just kidding! Glad to see an upload on my birthday, even if it's this trash.

Anonymous

Just remember, Twilight means never having to say you're kidding. Good luck with the 4th book, good sir.

Anonymous

Me sees the name of the episode: called it. Dom: who cares about Seth? Who cares about Leah? Free realistate meme : its terrible foreshadowing.

coredumperror

Hey cool, I didn't know you'd gotten a house! Did you buy, or are you renting? I bet it's nice having a lot more space. :) By the way, you mention Breaking Dawn right at the start, but I'm pretty sure you meant Eclipse. Also, "How did he enter the spirt world?" is written in your conspiracy blackboard. I think you meant "spirit"? Though an intentional typo would be amusing.

Anonymous

Still loving Il Neige ending credits music.

Exquisite Williams

As a Twilight fan I regret to inform you that it gets worse (even when I'm rewatching or rereading I can tell you I only like eclipse as it jumps into breaking dawn)

Anonymous

When this series is over, we need a compilation of Dom re-enacting al the books. It's absolute gold!

Exquisite Williams

Also, Stephanie Meyer being the terrible person that she is (death to the author is very apparent) decided to destroy Jacobs character because everyone liked him too much

Anonymous

Honestly, I'm glad you did Fifty Shades first without the Twilight deep-dive, it meant you were able to judge the book on its own 'merits' without that influence. It would be interesting for you to share your thoughts of Fifty Shades now you've read Twilight, but I don't know if that's really fair on your poor sanity!

Exquisite Williams

Also I am typing so much but Edward's mental space is soooo wild he just thinks so much and every other page is "woe is me I'm a monster" It is glorious. But the movies improve on the issues while making things hilariously worse I cannot tell you why I love them so much.

Anonymous

Jasper was not an expert in newborn wars because be was a confederate soldier. He was an expert because he was a soldier in newborn wars for territory in the Southwest and Mexico.

Anonymous
>>44083744

Honestly it would be really nice to get a novella series from the perspectivr of the rest of the Cullens. I know we get some insight in Midnight Sun because Edward reads minds but we don't get nearly enough imo

Anonymous

"My boy, look how she massacred my boy." was exactly how I felt after I read that forced kiss scene. (I had hope back then...)

Anonymous

So so glad I never read this series

Anonymous

Where can I download this version of bad guy lmao

Anonymous

The only good characters in Twilight are the ones that Meyer doesn't spend enough time on to ruin. :D

Saaski

😂 Loved the tee shirts!!

Robin Hildebrand

wow. Never expected Fifty Shades to be quite so similar to Twilight when it came to the abusive angle.

Melanie Klump

I think the whole imprinting thing would have worked better if they could only imprint on people who were mid-teens or older. The idea of finding someone who's your perfect match is sweet, but once you start bringing children into it...yeah, no.

Dragoncat

I think the reason I enjoyed this book way back when was A. I was not as educated on social issues as I am now and B. I was taking none of it’s seriously. To me it was cheesy, laughable melodrama.

Anonymous

I think its a bit short-sighted for people to assume that Bella was the whole reason why the Cullens and the Tribe were fighting. No one mentions that the newborns and the redhead won't stop once they get to Bella, they would probably try to hurt the whole town.

Anonymous

The fact that Bella has to marry Edward in order to have sex sums up the stupidity of celibecy till marrige. They've been dating for less than a year ?

Anonymous

New headcanon: Edward possessed Jacob's body at the start of Eclispe with the intent of making Belle hate him, which is why he's suddenly a prick. He didn't expect Jacob to find his way into Edward's body, but the werewolf does and tries his best to keep Belle away from Edward-Possessed-Jacob but can't explain it because... uh... he'll sound crazy? It works like curse rules and you can't talk about it? But the boys forget to turn back before midnight and so get stuck in each others bodies forever and completely forget they were the other person, resolting in huge personality changes but limited modivation changes. I am 100% serious and definitely not reading too deep into it (im joking)

regina burks

"It's not that deep, bro," never fails to make me giggle.

Anonymous

This may or may not have been in the book. Don't remember. It's been a long time and Smeyer puts a lot of stuff on her website to fill in gaps in the story if people have questions (sort of like Pottermore), so I've lost track of what comes from where. But I'm pretty sure Sam injured Emily by accident while asleep. He was having a dream that upset him and he turned into a wolf in bed, accidentally raking her face with his claws in the process. I know the movie was vague about the circumstances and that upset people for the same reason.

Anonymous

Im pretty sure it was referenced in the book. The whole accident thing sounds really familiar, and i never been to any of her websites or read anything other than the actual books.

Anonymous

Maybe it's just a matter of opinion, but I didn't really get domestic violence vibes if it is purely an accident like that. Sort of like if somebody is driving and accidentally injures their spouse in a car accident.

Anonymous

I have two daughter’s that I didn’t let read these books because I didn’t let them. I read them before coming to this discussion with them because a friend of my older daughter had described them to me in detail. I don’t believe in sheltering kids from the world; as very young teen girls, I didn’t believe the books showed healthy relationships. They did read them and were not fans, at all. They actually tracked down a meme with Louis and Lestat that said something like Lestat “ Is he sparkling ?” Louis “ That shit is completely unacceptable.”

Anonymous

Finally found time for Breaking Dom. The dress-up segments are even better than usual! Would appreciate audible trigger warnings like in the past