SHK CH 425 (Patreon)

Lilith was not having fun. In fact, one could say that she was having the exact opposite.

After all, there was nothing else like being smacked in the face by the consequence of your actions to sober up rapidly.

It all started the day before after Lilith kidnapped Camelia and fled farther outward.

Lustburg was without a doubt a very powerful Kingdom. In all of history, whenever adversity it faced, no matter how far it fell, it would always stand up.

All of this had been thanks to the different rulers of each generation — The Blessed.

Lilith was perhaps the first Queen in the history of Lustburg to not be Blessed. To not have any legitimacy and because of this, she had to fight all her way in to become respected as a Queen.

She had to put down many riots, face many schemes, and rises above everything.

For all the above reasons —- Lilith hated Lustburg. [1]

Deep resentment from losing her loved ones during the war and bitterness about how much she had to fight even though she did not even want to become queen.

All of this mixed with her thoughts of self-harm, inability to sleep, desire to die and so many more.

For her, the ruling had always been a burden. A burden she would gladly leave to Sol once he became old enough or any time he wished to get back the power that was rightfully his.

But despite all this bitterness, there had been one thing Lilith prided herself in…The thought that at least, she was doing a very good job at being a queen.

.

.

.

“I was too lax.”

“Please, your majesty forgi—”

The man who was begging on the ground had his head flying before he could even finish his sentence.

Lilith ignored the look of terror the inhabitants were throwing at her and swung her sword. No blood had even landed on it with how fast she moved. But she simply hated how she had to cut something so filthy.

Standing next to her, Camelia gave a bitter smile as she approached the inhabitants of the small city.

“Do not worry. Justice had been given and the oppressor was disposed of. May I know who is the second representative?”

“I am.”

Much calmer now thanks to her holy aura and gentle appearance, a young man approached and Camelia nodded before placing a hand on his forehead.

“With this, you will have my mark for a few days. Visit any church and explain the situation. Everything will be taken care of.”

“Thank you! Thank you!”

Camelia gave an even bitter smile when she watched all of them kneel to her in gratitude even though Lilith was the one who did the job.

She wished to speak but a look from her old friend stopped her from doing so. In the end, she simply sighed and placed her hand in prayer,

“May the Guidance of the goddess be with you.”

Meaningless words those were as the goddesses would never bother themselves with the plights of simple mortals.

.

.

.

A few hours later, even though darkness had fallen, songs of joy and happiness were sung, and burning torches illuminated the city.

A small impromptu festival was taking place and the citizens were happy.

Sitting far away from the fun and the songs, Lilith brough a mug of beer to her lips. Compared to the alcohol she could drink in the castle, it wouldn’t be a mistake to say that it tasted like nothing to her but she simply drank.

Forgetting that with her current body, she couldn't become intoxicated.

“A few golds for your thoughts.”

Camelia reached Lilith while holding a plate full of meat and other such food. She had received so many small gifts she had to flee.

Lilith shrugged, “I am just thinking about how foolish I was to think I was doing a good job.”

Camelia stayed silent before lightly biting on the meat, “You are — Were doing a good job. Thanks to you, Lustburg's national power never fell. The army became more powerful and no one dared to rise wave in the capital.”

“Indeed…In consequence, nearly all parts outside of the capital and the territory of the Duke were suffering.”

Lilith had not tried to make Lustburg better. All she wished was to keep the legacy that was given to her intact and then give it to Sol in the same way.

In a way, she was no different from those corrupt nobles. After all, she only cared about her own need and forgot her duty.

“Lilith. You know my past, right?”

Lilith looked up in wonder at her friend but nodded. Camelia was originally a village girl. [2]

A blind girl raised and loved in a small village before it was attacked and massacred by a bunch of bandits.

“This was during the Era of your father. The nobles were rampant back then and the position of all villages was even worse than it is now.”

“So. I guess I should be happy I wasn’t the worst ruler.”

“Well…You weren’t exactly the best, so you need to take what you can.”

Lilith laughed lightly at the dig and stole a fried chicken leg. The meat was definitely much tastier than whatever that beer was made of.

“Hey! Go get your own!”

“Sorry, pretty sure they would flee or kneel in fright if I approached.”

The two laughed and began to look at the star in silence.

“So. Will you tell me? Why you kidnapped me?”

“Because it seemed fun?”

“Lilith…”

“....Well…I am scared.”

Camelia opened her eyes wide and grabbed Lilith by the hair, “Who are you and what have you done to my friend.”

“Stop it.” Lilith swatted Camelia's hand aside and looked far in the distance, “I am ashamed to admit it. But I am scared to meet Lilin alone.”

Her voice was soft,

“There are so many things I want to do now and many more I want to obtain. But I do not know if I am worthy of them. Self-doubt and hesitation fill my mind. Even though I have gotten a second chance I wonder if I am deserving of it. I am scared to be told that I woke up too late.”

She chuckled,

“So I decided to laugh. Rather than crying and whining as I did for decades, I decided to have fun and face adversity with a smile. Hoping that somehow it would make things better…It didn’t.”

Lilith looked at her hands, “Hey, do you think I am being greedy?”

“Oh yes, you are.”

Camelia’s answer to this question was immediate.

[1]: Go reread CH 49. It was Lilith’s speech and thoughts in the coliseum. I honestly don’t know how many of you guys go reread a chapter when I put this.

[2]: Read Camilia's first interlude.

(AN: So I know I promised happiness; I wasn’t lying. We need some bitterness to enjoy the sweetness. Like with Nent or any other character, Lilith's growth will continue slowing beyond her arc. Once again, Lilith didn’t forget her path. It’s because she didn’t forget that she is trying to change. She is doing it awkwardly and clumsily in her own way.)