Patreon Prompt 102 (Patreon)

Prompt: Working together as newly hired bodyguards under a rather private contract, Roadhog and Zarya protect the Good Times bar from any public nuisances and disturbances. Finding a rowdy and drunken couple causing trouble, Roadhog and Zarya deal with them the only way they know how.

   The loud racket coming from the corner of the Good Times bar earned the ire of both patrons and employees alike. Uncaring of the nasty looks, Mckenzie and Alden were more than content loudly talking to one another as they chugged down their drinks or spilled them across the floor. Seeing how unpleasant the couple was making his bar, the owner decided to call in his temporary bodyguards.

   Mckenzie and Alden momentarily paused to acknowledge the pair of heavy footsteps approaching them. Turning to the side to shoo the unwanted visitors away, they were greeted by two members of the infamous Overwatch team. Zarya muscular build was on full display with her blue bodysuit, her head of short pink hair doing little to take away from her intimidating demeanor. Standing right next to her was a man whose barrel-like belly and gas mask identified him as Roadhog, an unusual companion to say the least. As different as the two were, they both asked that the couple in question either shut up or get out of the bar.

   Rather than be scared off, Mckenzie and Alden put on smug smiles. They loudly taunted the Overwatch members that they couldn’t harm them. Even if they decided to go that route, it would be a massive pay day when the lawsuit went to court. Acknowledging the limitations of their positions, Zarya and Roadhog were more than happy to show off their little legal loophole.

   With Roadhog grasping Mckenzie and Zarya lifting up Alden, the two of them set the rowdy customers down on the ground and pinned them beneath their hefty backsides. Grabbing hold of their stomachs, the Overwatch members shook them about until they heard the telltale rumblings of something unruly stirring around. All at once the gas came out in a flurry of flatulence that replaced the couple’s loud screams with the sounds of various PHHHHHRRRRTTTS and BRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAPPPPPSS. By the time they had emptied out their gas reserves, Roadhog and Zarya stood back up to see a dazed, but mostly unharmed couple. Getting up on shaky limbs, Mckenzie and Alden ran out of the bar as fast as they could, giving the gassy bodyguards a chance to bask in their noxious fumes and a job well done.